Hey everyone! I can't believe we are nearing the end of the road for this season with only one episode left. Thank you all for hanging in there till the end despite all the ugly fighting this season. I sit here with a heavy heart because this episode enrages me, saddens me and disappoints me. I was actually excited about this girls trip to Austin (a place I truly love) because I wanted everyone to get past the petty BS and get a clean slate and "reset". I DO NOT want to write this blog right now and it blows my mind that I've moved back to Dallas to end up spending this much time defending myself and why I'm loyal to LeeAnne. I am 100% sure of my choices in not turning my back on LeeAnne and I highly doubt that Stephanie would disown Brandi Redmond for her poor behavior or for getting wasted all the time. You can love the doer and not the deed. That is precisely why I speak in terms of "stand in her shoes" which means I always try to understand where the other person is coming from. But, of course that empowered mentality is way over some people's heads and that's why I said I had to talk down on their level.
Some people think LeeAnne and I have some dark secrets we're holding over each other. Not true. I've pealed LeeAnne off the floor when she was in her darkest depression and she has literally fed me when I got down to about 90 pounds after my boyfriend cheated on me. You never ever forget when someone was there when no one else was. I've seen LeeAnne's bloody bashed in face when her fiancé tried to kill her and beat her face into the ground.
So as if I would be a switch hitter and go sit on the #TeamStandi bench and not take up for my sister of 30 years. Let's be real here. The girls are all saying I turn a blind eye on LeeAnne's behavior...how quickly we all forget about me calling her out and screaming down her throat on the street in Episode 5.
Stephanie didn't approve of my remark at dinner in Austin, but I do surround myself with women who bring out the best in me and do not normally spend time with girls who are so childish, judge harshly and talk over each other this rudely. I felt thrown under the bus. Hearing Stephanie say in her confessional that I was one of LeeAnne's bitches and her mouth was just low. I would never imagine sweet Stephanie would speak so nasty. I think what she said about Marie taking it up the a-- , was even lower! I'm sure her Pentecostal parents were so proud when they heard their angel speak such profanity! I feel like an idiot right now for putting any effort into trying to unite this group.
The thing that blows my mind even more about this whole insane situation is that it could have all been alleviated by Marie Reyes owning it. I want to puke when I visualize her big bug eyes lying straight to our faces. It really is dangerous behavior and it's shocking that the girls can't see it. Ok, I will give Brandi a little credit because she did mention a few times that she did see that LeeAnne felt betrayed by Marie.
But we are dealing with a pack mentality here and Brandi's voice isn't strong or loud enough to convince the rest. It shocks me that Marie is so prideful and willing to ruin a 20 year friendship instead of just telling the truth.
Again, there were only three of us in that car and I had never met Taylor so it certainly wasn't me who told him that stupid story. Marie saying that he "made it up" is just more lying. Lying is a slippery slope and you start with one and then have to keep lying to back up the first lie. Really, out of all the things he could have pulled out of thin air it just so happened to be the one thing that us three were present for! OMG. I feel the heat going up my face right now. I have zero tolerance for liars!!!! When Brandi brought it up in the bus that Taylor said Marie told him that story, I was proud of LeeAnne for keeping her composure and not going off on Marie right there, right then. I knew she didn't want to ruin the rest of the drive to Austin.
I know all the girls and you viewers probably think I'm lying when I say I did not hear LeeAnne yelling at Marie that night. I wish to God I had heard it! I don't normally drink as much as these girls and you can see me running around the house giving everyone Fireball shots. We started drinking on the bus early that day and proceeded to drink ALL day! I passed out cold. I woke up when LeeAnne came back in the room and got in bed. She was half crying and half fuming and told me she lost it on Marie. She was beyond hurt that Marie would use this stupid private story against her ESPECIALLY with this group of girls she was trying to reconcile with. I actually encouraged LeeAnne to go talk to Marie the next morning and take ownership of her behavior. Oh, but I'm her bitch. Ok.
FACT: LeeAnne was B E T R A Y E D.
FACT: Marie L I E D. Well, has lied several times now.
FACT: LeeAnne should not have threatened her or yelled abusively.
FACT: I do not approve of or condone that behavior. I'm in N O way an enabler.
Can we stick to the facts? I was beyond pissed that Marie was looking like the saint and all the girls were completely clueless, oblivious or maybe they were just consciously choosing to ignore Marie's betrayal to get at LeeAnne. LeeAnne repeatedly tried to apologize to the girls that morning and they kept cutting her off. I swear, I have never been around so many rude women, sounds like LeeAnne blew a gasket and went overboard on the threatening yells and if the girls thought it was truly life-threatening why did Cary record it instead of calling 911? I almost wish she had nipped it in the bud on the bus right when Brandi revealed that Taylor said Marie told him that story. I think she brewed over it all day and then with the all day drink fest it was just a recipe for disaster.
These girls can call me names for being loyal to LeeAnne. At the end of the day, it's about our loved ones knowing we love them unconditionally, not the opinions of others who only see what they want to see. I was not going to let LeeAnne run away and leave Austin under those circumstances and let Marie win. Iron sharpens iron and true friends stand by your side even when you're at your weakest. I wish everyone in this world had the sisterly love that we have. Do LeeAnne and I get on each other's last nerves at times? OH YEA! Has she approved of every choice I've made? HECK NO! LeeAnne hated it when I used to do drugs and the old crowd I hung around here in Dallas, but she was always still there for me. Again, love the doer not the deed.
Stephanie and Brandi have been friends for about 10 years and LeeAnne and I have known each other three times longer than that. They of all of the girls should understand the meaning of my loyalty.
Dont tweet me unless you have something good to say. I really can't handle the hatred this week! @TiffanyHendra