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Catherine Ommanney

"Some People are Not Destined to Be Friends"

Catherine elaborates on her relationship with Erika.

Sep 24, 2010

I realized today that it's time I explained myself a little more and rather than writing my blog when I’m rushing in a cab or walking down the street or whilst on the phone, I am actually going to spend the time to write and express myself properly and address some major issues I have not yet relayed!

FYI, Charles and I were on the rocks and on the point of no return, probably even prior to filming this first season. But I’m not a quitter and kept trying to hold our new family together. It is unbelievably surreal watching my life last year in one of the saddest times in my life -- full stop.

I sit there and think -- is that my life??!! The pained expressions on my face -- I was absolutely miserable.

Lets get back to Aunt Francis Fiasco to begin with: I arrived on time nearly two hours before some of the other gals and their guys rocked up (heavy traffic? My ass!!) Charles was the only one not invited and when I left he was furious. I didn’t realize the other men were coming and I knew that when he asked me when I got home, who was there, he was going to go nuts! I had that in my mind the entire time. I had long chats with Aunt Francis that were not shown as well as offering to do all the cleaning up before an hours drive home again -- Aunt F told me the wine was off! Saw her too for a nice chat at the premiere party. Wish I had an aunty like her to go and see on Sundays!

 

Stacie was not around to be able to say goodbye to. The end.

As far as Tyra Banks crap -- REALLY??????? OMG if I ever wish I'd not opened my big mouth on that opinion!!!????? Talk about flogging that one to death!

All the other stuff I own. Good, bad, and the ugly.

 

Erika bollocks - oh dear -- Stacie’s single girlfriend that happens to be attached to the hip of Stacie for most "occasions." Every single time we met I would always make sure she never felt left out -- I knew firsthand about sometimes as a single mother turning up without a partner can be a little lonely at times. I made sure she always got a drink and brought her into conversations when she was standing alone. I stood out in the pouring rain one night just to walk in with her, so she didn't feel awkward when Stacie was busy etc. I NEVER gave her any cause to want to rip my head off. By the way obviously there aren't enough minutes in an episode, but that whole barrage lasted half an hour at least before I bowed out unable emotionally and unwilling to extend energy I didn't have, fighting her battle. BS. Very well-balanced. She has a chip on both shoulders.

Thank god for Lynda shutting her down and sticking up for me -- as a host of what was supposed to be an ice cream social, with our kids there listening next door, I was really disappointed Stacie let it go and also my dear friend Mary was mute. Who said she was in shock? Well sit in my chair then! That’s shock.

We are all different, thank god. That's what makes life interesting and the way we handle situations. Anyway Lynda and Mary left, came back to mine that night and loved me back to life -- mwa. God, they were hard days and hard nights! I put on a very brave face. But I'm a Leo through and through, but on the rare occasions my girls see me cry, I get so upset with myself for letting them see, but then we are all human, and it's OK to not be able to carry the burdens 24/7 sometimes. I can’t beat myself up about it.

The reason I didn’t engage with Erika at the gay marriage event was because every single time I saw her she would accost me (whatever the occasion!) and bang on and on about our differences! I didn’t want any distractions from what we were there to talk and educate ourselves on gay marriage. Enough Erika! Some people are destined not to be friends. It's fine.

Got to love Jason. He makes me laugh so much and really he gets me. He has been an awesome friend from the moment we met!

Finally I don't like to repeat myself normally but I am - THANK YOU so much for all your comments. I actually read every single one now as they give me hope, encouragement, and some criticisms I need.

My daughters are at school back in the UK, as that was always the agreement with their daddy back home. I miss them sooooo much, and seeing them every week on the show fills me with so many emotions. We have never been apart. Can’t wait until they come back to see me in D.C. very soon!! My unconditional love for them grows stronger every day. I’m so proud of them. The three of us were going through such serious turmoil back then, but I hope I have taught them some good lessons in life. They will never be victims and there will always be the mountains they too will have to climb. I hope I have equipped them well in lessons of life, if nothing else!

Funny old life isn't it? Only two more episodes, and I have a feeling they are going to be nuts!! Enjoy ... X

(P.S. my dress on WWHL was by Alice and Olivia for all those that asked!)

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your my favorite! You are funny and not afraid to tell it like it is. Most of the other ones are just plain crazy and out of touch with reality. Stay Cool!

cat, don't despair - that erika woman was being the typical yankie mean girl bully. i've experienced it while i've been over here too. they think they can punch you in the gut and then 'move on'. that's not how us british gals do it! she was terribly rude and you had EVERY right to remove yourself AND your girls from that situation. i could not believe the cheek of the woman following you out to bully you further! she IS a mean girl.

chin up lovey.

Dear Cat,

Hope you keep up...you seem to be going through a really tough time and certainly did not deserve the low level behavior from Erika but so be it - some people are just mean-spirited. I find your comments funny and yes, maybe too direct for people that have been hiding behind their sofas all their lives so maybe one unsolicited piece of advice is to listen and try to understand the limited world most people live here. It doesn't mean you have to be deceitful but rather it is a way for you to engage in less conflict. So what if people are dumb and stupid? Let them be who they are - you are not responsible for showing the way or teaching them anything...enjoy your life with your daughters.

I sincerely hope you are able to work out whatever personal issues you are having with your husband...I am sure it's not easy but then, we make our beds and then we have to lie on them. Also, nothing is perfect, is it? Hoping you can work things out if that is what will make you happy...

All the best,

Cat You are one of my favorites on the show and think it's great that you stay true to who you are. Coming from a person who is a new person on the block as well, I too have been called "the mean girl". Some people are not meant to be friends! Your great and look forward to the last few episodes!

Love you Cat! Erika is the one with issues. Just because you don't like Tyra Banks doesn't make you a rasist. I've lived in Europe and the people there don't have the over sensitivity to race as people here in America do. It is wrong of her to judge you like that. Good luck to you and your lovely girls. Hope you get to see them soon. If there is a second season of the wives of DC, I hope you are on it. It wouldn't be the same without you!

Cat, love you just the way you are and the way that Erika has treated you in public and around the other women is just plain RUDE with a capital "R". It totally makes me sick when women play that game as it just makes them look small and you just hold your head up and stay the heck away from her. Ever since your comment about Ms. Banks, she has had it out for you in a big way, I truly believe it has something to do with the "black" thing. And the sick item is, you are the least prejudice person in the crowd it seems. Thank God you have other good friends on the show etc. and I would not even worry about her being in a room with you, ignore her, it truly made me cry when she started that crap about your being mean with your children over at Stacey's house. It rather pissed me off to be honest. I know you have your hands full with your husband traveling and with your friend's passing, I know you were totally overwhelmed as well. My love is with you and I would be honored to be in any room with you, I think you are so classy, funny, lovable and kind. And I think you are a very good mother, don't ever doubt that. Your children are so intelligent and great. Pat yourself on the back, sometimes we all need to do that.

I like you Cat, but you definitely strike me as someone who can dish it -- but not take it. Work on that.

Cat: I was absolutely shocked by Erika's behavior..truly shocking...I cannot believe that she is allowed to be filmed...is she a housewife too? You are a great mom, and a great friend..she is not on your level..keep your chin up!

Hope whatever you were going through is better now! You have become my favorite housewife!!

Hey Cat, your blog has made some things more clear to us viewers. thanks for that. I had to comment about it because when you mentioned Erika always on the hip of Stacie, well, it echoed what I keep saying to my friend when we watch the show. I wondered if she did not provide some kind of security for Stacie to show some racial balance in the group. I even at one time wondered if she was one of the housewives that almost chose, so they let her hang out so much....As for the meeting to discuss gay marriages, I had to wonder why Stacie and her husband were there...I had the feeling that David probably already knew their stand, and I have known people like them who repeat that worn out phrase "marriage is between...blah blah blah" The incident at Stacies house with Erika digging in with her heels was pathetic...she knew the kids were in the next room, and what she did was low class....I think she wants to be a part of the show and it seems like she doesn't mind being a mean girl...your conversation with Jason about "the desperate housewives" in MD, reminds me why I don't like living where I am at...I believe I don't fit in here either because it very much the same way..when you don't feel like you fit with the community, it can be a horrible thing...I am about to put my house up for sale...You are more like the average american woman more than you can imagine...you are just around the un-average of the bunch of us, trust me....I wish the show were going to be longer,,,it seems like the NJ show wouldn't end, and we don't want to see this show end so soon.....

Got kicked out by my bloody iPad :+} So was saying how I was from France and had a hard time at the beginning but Americans can make the best of friend you just have to test there happy face through the tribulation of life. Unlike inEurope where it a slower process to make friend at the in the US even the people you do not give too shits about you seem nice - LOL so hang in there!

Cat I am totally on your side,Erica has been rude to you all season. She has a problem not you. Keep your head held high and know the truth will reveal itself. Stay strong and enjoy your time in the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA.

Cat, your a spitfire. I enjoy your personality on the show. Im sorry that some of the members play the race card and have no sense of humor. Although what you say can be rude and chastise you out of American social groups, dont change. There are people, like me, who are very cultured americans without being snobby. I been through all of Europe and even though not through England I understand where you are coming from. Im sorry you have to deal with catty Americans BS I assure you there are many Americans like you and who support you. Just because your rich and in DC next to politicians doesnt make you a class act. Beware of these people, travel more around the USA it quie different place to place. You would fit nicely out west side of the country where I am from. Keep it up girl, I dont think anything wrong with you, many other ppl are just messed up in the head.

Cat, you are fabulous! As for Erika...her attitude speaks volumes and the way she acts is disgusting. Thank goodness for Lynda and her not being afraid to put Erika in her place! Im sooooo tired of the purple, green, pink categories and its pretty thick on this show. How sad!

Cat, you are very blunt and you do not have a filter, it seems as though you feel that you can say whatever you want to people and they should accept it but when someone speaks their mind to you you are mortified. You can't have it both ways, if you can dish it you should be able to take it. If you don't want to be the recipient of bluntness and unfiltered comments then maybe you should give others the same courtesy.

Cat surely you can be a bit caustic at times, but I get you. I don't think you have a single mean bone in your body. Eff Erika. I think she just wants to be one of the housewives and just trying to butt in and get some face time on the show. Oh well. Shrug it off I say. Move on. You have 2 wonderful daughters. Love them. Good Luck.

Cat,

I feel so silly writing this (I NEVER take the time to comment online--that's reserved for chats with "wine-n-whine" nights with girlfriends), but I have to comment after tonight's episode! You are a breath of fresh air, in my personal opinion. I also moved to DC from a completely different place, and I found it very difficult to be myself. There are so many people there who are absolutely wonderful and so many people who are insecure and looking for a reason to fight (who has time for that?!). You are hilarious, you are charming, you are intelligent. Please keep being you. There will always be people who don't appreciate honesty or a biting sense of humor, but that shouldn't upset you and it certainly shouldn't keep you from speaking your mind. People are so damn sensitive these days, and it is such a waste of time! Keep being you...watching you develop friendships reminds me so much of my move to DC (I was 23 when I moved there, so I was absent the kids, husband, and lavish parties...but the human condition of trying to make your home in a place that's unfamiliar is completely familiar to me). Can't wait to see what happens. Hope you're loving life!

I totally get you. Although you really seemed harsh at first... I can really see myself in you and how we relate to people. Erika was totally ridiculous. I wished you would have put her back in her place as you know to do so well. By the way, I'm french. and arriving in America 7 years ago was a cultural shock and it still is at time. sometimes, you make comments and you don;t realize that it upsets people because back home, everybody would probably agree with you or laugh about it (like the Tyra Banks S..t). It is so frustrating when people cannot get over it. can't wait to see you for the last two episodes and the reunion show. Bisous !

Cat, Tonight's episode was heartbreaking, to watch you obviously in a very raw emotional state. You always make me laugh, and your sarcastic wit is pure comedy. I am sorry that you are going through a tough time, but you are such a strong woman, I know you will come out on top! I know some people don't get your humor, but I find it refreshing.....you will always know where you stand with Cat! Your daughters are beautiful, and you looked just drop dead gorgeous on Watch What Happens Live with Andy. Hope you will be back next season! Your biggest fan in Illinois:}

Cat, I want to apologize to you for Ericka’s behavior. As an American woman that has lived on foreign soil I can appreciate the hospitality that has been extended to me when I have lived abroad. Obviously Ericka has no couth, manners, feelings or for that matter decorum. How anyone could justify her comments much less pursuing the conversation in front of your children is beyond belief. What an impression that must have left on your girls. You did the right thing by leaving and seeing after yourself and your children. I hope you meet more enlightened and joyful people with a big dash of fun in the days ahead. Cheers to you! Daphne

Cat: We love you. I'm sorry you had to go through such a hard time in your personal life while taping these episodes. You handled yourself with great strength. Your girls adore you; you are an excellent role model for them. Thanks. Watching you reminds me to be strong.

Erika was way out of line, she was rude and mean in someone else home. Shame on her and NO CLASS at all! Your correct, omg beat it to death, I to am NOT a Tyra Banks fan, do not care for her at all. Erika you owe all the ladies an apology for your crap and Cat again, you were out of line especially with the kids there.

Hi Honey!! I just love all you DC babys!! I think ya'll are so cute!! Especially YOU, MARY, STACIE, & LYNDA!! I love, love ya'lls hubbys also!! Now, ya'll have yummy husbands!! HMMMMM! I am married, not dead. ;) I see some viewers stating, oh DC is boring. Come on, they just got going, give them time. Why does it always have to be argueing, and bullsh t? I love it, ya'll are sticking together when some dumb ss drunk wine-o, attacks the other (or kids). I really hope you & your honey, and the others I named above stick it out! More power to ya!! KISS KISS!! t from texas

Cat,

I knew you were unhappy in your marriage after I watched the exchange between you and your husband three episodes ago. I, must admit, did not care for you for after the first episode. I do not have this opinion anymore. I have a couple of friends with your abrasive in your face personalities....

Always remember...Every single raindrop encourages flowers to bloom.

Cat, first of all let me tell you that you are my FAVORITE housewife ever! I love that you say whats on your mind! You have the guts to say what others only think. I love it!!

I can't believe Ericka attacked you the way she did. I mean, she really needs to just get over herself. She seems to be one who likes to stir the pot so to speak. Her behavior was totally inappropriate in the first place, and then to carry on with it in front of your children when you were trying to keep it together and get your kids out of there. I don't know how you kept your cool, but I would have lost it on her. She looked like a total jerk.

Wising you peace, and all the best.

Cat: You are right. Erika was over the top, but you are consistently snarky. And Erika is right, then you act innocent, hurt, wronged. You may have been going through a hard time, but you may have a velvety smooth voice that you knowingly use to deliver a verbal one-two punch. You knew exactly what you were saying about Mary's daughter.

Cat,

Thanks for the explanations and knowing that you did have something else going on during the dinner with Aunt Francis makes things a little easier to understand. As for tonight's episode, I think you got what you deserved. I don't mean that in a mean way but you are the first one to speak your mind and offer your opinion whether it's asked for or not. You have stated many times that it's your London "Brashness" that always comes out. Well tonight it was Erika's brashness that came out. Both of you were out of line and need to learn some manners. Also, you can't run out of the room every time things get a little uncomfortable or make you a little hot under the collar. You've confronted people over and over again on the show and we, as the viewers have seen it make others uncomfortable and tonight, right or wrong, Erika did it back to you. Either way, it's not nice...

Cat, you are more than wellcome in my home in Oklahoma any day ! I love you taking on politics in America. Especially on the healthcare you spewed at that crone you had to talk to. That is what America gets for letting a Brit in. Some valuable knowledge straight and to the point. Am I anit-american, No, I just hate our government, yeah, and bitter, why, I have had a terminal lung disease a very long long time and no help at all. Such a long horrible story I will spare you from. But we are a lot alike. Maybe I should go to England. I bet I could get help with my illness. And probably, get along with a lot more people, Like you. You Go Girlfriend !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Love Jackie

Cat, You get attacked because you are not a sheep. You are your own person. You do not adopt an opinion just to feel part of a crowd. You will never be a sheep. You have an independent mind. That is something to cherish. It is better to have a few choice friends and be your own person than to sell your soul to be liked by the sheep. Sheep are so insecure. Your lack of insecurity threatens them. They can't mold you into their image. They can not understand you. They never will. It is their loss, not yours. You are incredible just the way you are.

Cat, I think Erika is just jealous~!! She's not even a housewife. I think she wants to be part of the show sooooo bad that she needs to stir up crap.

Cat, when you were first introduced I did not like you, but as the show goes on you have become my most favorite housewife. You are smart, sincere, progressive and ORIGINAL. I think, Erica was wrong in attacking you like that, and the only reason she walked up to you in the end was because it would have looked bad if she had not. Also, Stacie as host did a poor job, she should have intervened and calmed the whole situation down. But, from her blog it seems that she agreed with Erica and wanted someone to check you. Awful!

I wish you best of luck in your life.

You are just fine. Be yourself. And don't let anyone treat you like that again, whether a guest or hostess.

I think you're great! You are honest, forthright,and are not afraid to voice your opinion. I admire that!! We should all be that brave....we sure would have less problems in this crazy world!! I love to listen to you talk..marvelous. You, Lynda and Mary make the show. Keep up the good work!!!!

Cat,

I understand where you're coming regarding the Erika situation, but you really do seem to contradict yourself a lot. You say that you always feel accosted and attacked every time you interact with her and yet you do the same thing when you come into contact with the Salahi's (especially Tareq). I do believe Erika came out of the gate swinging at Stacie's home, but you yourself have done the same thing on more than one occasion. You also have a habit of "annihilating" people behind their backs, which in all honesty, is probably worse. It just seems a bit hypocritical to me.

Bottom line: Erika was wrong (and does have a slight chip on her shoulder), but you're no angel yourself.

Erica was out on line, and in front of your kids no less! Good for Lynda for the assist in the situation. Shame on Stacey for not doing more to calm the situation.

Loved your speaking so openly for marraiage equality. Ditto for Lynda.

Nice to see more sides of you as the show unfolds. I still think you are brash at times, but I also love that quality. I do not think your intent is to be mean, but rather some people are sensitive when it comes to bluntness. I would ask them if they preferred you lied to their face? Sadly, some would say yes if it meant making them feel better.

Liked the episode.

Cat, hope all is well; can't wait to see what you bring to the show next season once those personal, heavy burdens have been lifted.

Just an observation but I think Erika is nasty because she's very jealous of you. Please stand up to her or she'll continue to victimize you.

Cat! I think you are great, real and honest. I love that you are continuing life in the U.S. and still giving D.C. a shot although you are no longer neccesarily obligated to do so. Good luck with the book & all else, I think you seem positive and introspective so you will follow your heart and surely with your will and brashness (we all need to be sometimes) you will be right where you need to be when all is said and done. I hope the times you miss your girls will not be too horrible and that will pass somewhat easily between the times you will be able to be with them :)

i don't like tyra either...not a fan of oprah or ellen(and i'm a gay man)...agree with your opinion...no one should judge you just because you don't like a black talk show host(by default that does not make u a racist)...love ya!

You are simply wonderful. My partner and I adore you.

You don't owe Erika anything, you're entitled to like or dislike anyone regardless of their color. Personally I wouldn't like Tyra if she was white, purple or green, just don't like her. I think you're great as do a lot of other people : ) So don't let Erika get to you. She isn't one of the housewives, WHY is she even speaking???????

I think you are a wonderful person just the way you are. I loved you even in the first couple episodes, I could tell you were just being real and others were taking some things WAY too seriously/too far (hint hint Erika).

You keep your chin up! Your daughters are two very blessed little girls, your love for them absolutely radiates from you. It could be what keeps me literally smiling nearly every time you are on camera.

God bless you Cat. I pray all your sorrows are just a road to one huge happiness ahead.

Cat, I love you and can see that you are a wonderful, amazing person. I also see what Erika sees in you. I don't think you're bad, I just think you could be a little more sensitive regarding your comments to others. Not that you asked, or care! LOL! It would just be a positive change for you and all.... love & peace! xoxo

Cat - I don't know what Erika has up her bum about you, but she needs to get over it. She definitely attacked you for no reason. And if the reason is regarding Tyra, so what! We all see people on TV or print that we "like" or "don't like".

Cat, I think you are wonderful just the way you are. I love your sense of humor. Just know that some people won't get you and you may need to apologize and never talk to them again. That's how I've done it.

And last point, I don't think Mary would publicly stand up for anyone if both her feet were on fire. My take is she wants to be liked by everyone and wants everyone to like each other. But, there are times when, as a true friend, you need to speak up.

Cat, I think you are a beautiful, wise, and witty person. I love that you speak the truth. I can see the fakeness in a lot of people and I know from the moment you opened your mouth you were my kind of girl. This world is so full of politically correct people and when someone says..."wait a minute you are fake and I am not going to pretend like I like you" people say "How dare her!" Well bravo Cat, Bravo!!!!! I wish you all the happiness in the world. Your girls are amazing, you are beautiful and I hope you get to read this...(they don't post everyones comments). Keep staying true to yourself....it is a breath of fresh air. Amanda Panick

Cat, I feel so horribly that your daughters overheard their mother being criticized. I remember a similar incident in my life, twenty years ago, that I will never forget. Long story short, my mother was late to a birthday party for one of my uncles, because she gave someone without a vehicle a ride home from their job. While I was in another room playing with my cousins, I overheard my aunts and uncles criticizing her, saying that he priorities were "screwed up." It hurt to hear my mother scrutinized behind her back in such a meanspirited way. Just had to share that with you...

Cat--you're my fave!!! I have no idea why that Erika HATES you. Love Lynda for shutting her up. She truly has a good heart. Keep strong Cat. We're all praying for you!!

Cat, I think you are very brave. You've endured a lot it seems and I give you a lot of credit for doing it on camera. Erica's behavior was abhorrent, she should have pointed that "mean girl" finger back at herself. I hope things look up for you. Oh and your girls are fabulous, what angels!

omg. I am not the type to get online and discuss anything I see on tv cause i like to think I have a life....but...that Erica was DEAD wrong tonight. I don't know how the show may or may not have been edited but honey, that lady is hypocritical with a capital H.! Cat: I happen to like your style. I think you tell it how you see it and at times it may seem crass but you did nothing in this latest episode to warrant the nastiness that was Erica on that couch. I found myself angry and disgusted at Erica and wanting her to get the hell off of my television screen. And listen, I don't fancy Tyra Banks either...and no....i don't know her. Something about her just irks me. I'm sure she is as sweet as apple pie...but she irks me nonetheless. You don't have to like anyone you don't want to and Erica was the sole cause of that nonsense on the couch. She was mean, negative, rude and unnecessary. Hmph...play your position Erica (that of the sidekick). Good night from New York City.