Failure examples include:
Do you own the home featured on the show and on Bravotv.com?
Did you send your Financial Statement over in disappearing spy ink to Stacie to protect your privacy?
Did you donate any more wine than the one sparkling wine bottle you sabraged onto Lynda's badonkadonk for Paul's birthday party?
Man Rule: Look people in the eye when you are talking to them.
Failure to do so will give off the perception that you are either hiding something or not telling the truth. Eyes are often called the window to the soul and failure to maintain eye contact is disrespectful to the person you're lying, I mean, talking to.
Exceptions: You have no soul.
See also: If you can fake sincerity, the rest is easy.
Man Rule: Your wife should never have to tell you to apologize.
Especially to another woman. If you're unable to recognize you have just screwed the pooch big-time with a member of the opposite sex, you should be quarantined for the duration with a 24-7 ration of Oprah and Dr. Phil reruns until properly sensitized. In the case of disagreement, yes, women should encourage men to apologize in an abundance of relationship caution, but to be "told" you have to apologize indicates your internal filters need to be recalibrated and tuned up for life outside the cave.
Exceptions: Guy's Night Out (GNO)
I am not apologizing while getting my drink on, "Sorry For Partying" rules are in effect while men are in their "If I had feelings they would be hurt" zone. Women, we need this precious downtime from shouldering responsibility for always being wrong under the Hilary Clinton Act (HCA) that declared the #1 Rule that was obvious to women for centuries, "Men are always wrong," which was amended recently to add HCA #2 Rule: "When in doubt, see Rule #1."
See also: Darwin's Guide to Evolutionary Relationship Building
Rich is HYSTERICAL and so right on, and poetically put! This blog actually made me feel compassion for the first time for the crazies.... and that's what they are; CRAZY. It's like watching the Kelly / St. John break-down clip, at some point everyone is going to get that zap to realization like the girls did. Unfortunately Tareq and even his brainwashed follower are very unlikable crazies. I hope we have a ton of talented people going to school to be qualified therapists. If these reality shows are just a window into the vast number of people in need of a good adjustment by a licensed professional...... we are gonna need a ton!
Hi Rich, You are brilliant and hilarious. I am very happy for you and Mary as it looks like you guys have a great family: loving parents and good kids. Lots of luck to Lolly in her job hunting. Please keep on posting. You made my day. Thanks mucho.
Great blog, Rich, and spot on. Loved your humor!! All of us should be so lucky as to have a Rich, and Ebong, or a Jason as our "other halves". What great MEN. Hope to see all three of you next season...you are worth watching, as well as the women. Bravo can delete the little boy and the abused? little girl from next season. We love you, Rich!!
Rich Amons, you are one funny man...and I love your rules! Fortunately the men in my life KNOW these rules and live by them...which is why they are in my life! You, Mary and your family are fabu - hope to see you next season without the crazy delusional ones!
Rich, I heard you mention on the show that you are Irish Catholic and since I am as well, I knew I'd like you! Coming from a family of 11 was a struggle but my Mom was very involved in our lives as Mary is. You definitely got it right when talking about the "Salami's"!! If one of my brothers threw wine in a woman's face, I'd kick his butt!!! When will they ever get it? NEVER!! Best of luck to you, Mary is a lucky woman - wink wink:)
When will you have a printable copy of the "Man Rules" in their entirety. I love you, your wife, your kids & most of all your crazy pants. The relationship you have with your wife is refreshing. Best of Luck to you, Mary & Lolly.
I know I seem to be the only one who feels that you need to clean up your own house and not worry about anyone else's. Your all obsessed with this couple. I don't think you are funny in the least just arrogant. Maybe Bravo has not let any negative be posted unless it is about this couple. I have posted a few negative comments on your Ladies and have not seen them yet.
Rich - you are all that and a bag of chips! Great blog. I enjoyed getting to know you/Mary this season.
well written. What a gentleman. Too bad there aren't more of you in this world. Thanks for writing. I hope your fellow castmates (certain househusbands) read this and take note.
great blog, spot on. You are well-spoken and a gentleman. Too bad some of the other househusands cannot take tips from you. Disrespecting women doesn't get you much love (unless your wife is a sociopath)
You are a bright guy with a great wit. He will not ever get it. We all know little boys like him. You stood up for your family in a non confrontational way. Mary had really had it with them. I love her!
I hope you blog about the consequences of breaking a man rule. Someone posted about Tariq throwing wine in Lynda's face. When that was revealed on the reunion show a lightbulb went off in my head. I instantly "got" him. He's one of those guys. So what is the appropriate guy response to seeing this assault on a woman without her escort? Ebong pretty much said that if he had been there he would have knocked Tariq out. If Ebong had been there it would never have happened. I guess what I'm asking is if someone at the dinner should have kicked his ass.
Awww! I have a huge crush on you Rich (sorry Mary!)....surely to God, those Slimy Salahi's won't be asked back next season. He**, for that matter - they should be in jail for their shenanigans!
Unfortunately, you have to be a real man to understand Man Rules or to know that they apply to you. I'm sure this blog went right over Tareq Salahi's head.
I think you and Mary are adorable together. Mary was right that the "S" couple hijacked the show but Bravo let them do it. I think it's too bad Mary's charity did not get the publicity it should have during the show.
Rich! You and Simon are my two favorite husband bloggers! Yeah for you two, keeping it real. I love it. I think I will stick around for you guys.
Nicely written, thanks for adding a little class to the tone of the show. Your family is lovely, your wife seems to be so much fun. I really enjoyed your segments immensely. Cat was also magnificently entertaining. The Salahis are scum, period. Time is not on their side as scandal after scandal proves them to be degenerate grifters.
Your blog is very well-written and hilarious. We always like the episodes where the editors feature the Amons family because you tell it like it is. (your reality). And you can crack up at yourselves which make it seem like 'you get it'. The summary of the Man-Rules in this blog cracks us up. The Turners and the Amons should be featured more; telling the truth, finding the truth and seekingthe truth, what concepts!
Rich, I truly enjoy reading your blog. You are very well spoken and know how to communicate without offending. I love that men (for the most part) can have their differences and then move on, whereas women hold onto their issues much longer. I think your family is a typical one with the regular problems that face each and every one of us. Yes, we have to deal with our children and try to get them to a place where they are independent, but the road is bumpy along the way. Hang in there, you and Mary are doing a great job. Thank you for sharing with all of us.
i think you are very good husband father and writer.I am a Housewives fan and its the first blog i ve read so far that brings up the whole housewives circuit(cirque)to the right level. I like you distanced and authoironic comments, sharp eye wrapped in diplomacy. Keep writing!
Your pants you modeled for your wife- $160 ? Your haircut -$60? Your wine you drink- $40 ? Your blog - PRICELESS!
Please get The Donald to give u a show!!!!!!!!!
love it! I think that sums up what went wrong with the show. The Salahi's high jacked the show, as your wife puts it, and i would have enjoyed the show alot more without them. Mary was my favorite, she seemed the most real and i loved your family. Michaele seemed very fake and her husband seemed like he wanted to be a "housewife" and would insert himself to get air time. This is why I think he broke so many "man rules" which is aweful. Love your blog and your family and i hope yall are back next season! Best wishes xoxo
Another honest and funny/real blog! Well done! Your family is wonderful and I love the interaction between you all. You showed us a "real" family (not the Candy mt. kind) and for that we fell in love with you all. I thought it was only right that all of the "men" (and the one little smudgy elf) got to be on the reunion shows because you were all very much part of the season. Also I loved you guys being there as the protectors of your women.
You maintained your family dignity and rose above the sparkly muck! Well done! Hope your family is on again next season and that it is a NON sparkly season!
So funny and entertaining, it's nice to see someone not take life too seriously, relax and enjoy whatever you can take from it. It was very impressive how you handled yourself in what was a really pathetic spin of circling from two very self absorbed lost in la la land people. They really deserve each other, but it is sad that they do not recognize how much mental health care they need. Body language is very telling and one could sure tell by their faces, they did know they had been caught, so they just kept spinning.
It appears you and Mary have a strong marriage and support each other as well as being good role models for your children. Good job! When someone is doing harm to you, making a choice to remove yourself from them is the best decision. Hope the next season, should there be one, is minus 1 couple and some highlights can be put on living a "real" life filled with "normal" events, rather than what they added or imploded into the show. All the best to you and your family.
I AGREE,"..eventually you run out of people to blame and there is just you". AS reprehensible as the Salahis are, and make no mistake they are strange and criminal, your family joined the show knowing their history. While severe damage came out while filming, it seems to me that Mary was game enough to sign up for the show, Salahis and all. Their reputation preceeded them, and you have no one to really blame other than yourselves for being part of the DC show, highjacked and all.
Dear Rich, I love your blog. You are a breath of fresh air and your messages are entertaining. I have really enjoyed getting to know your family. Love Mary and Lolly. Wish our families could hang out. I thing it would be a blast. Looking forward to next season.
BRAVO ! BRAVO ! BRAVO !...Your the MAN! WOW what a reunion, everyone showed their true colors. Wish I could have been there in person so I could share my thoughts and opinions about all of the shameless actions that took place during the show. Just as well, at my age of 79 years young I would not have been very polite or been able to behave myself. Take good care Barbara Oh, tell Mary I remember Arthur Godfrey I use to watch his show, he was the greatest entertainer , also I can see a resemblance .
Thank you for your comments. You brought out some really good points. I hope they will be taken to heart by certain people and they can move forward and in the future be better people.
I waswatching the reunion. Did Tareq really just say he threw a glass of wine in Linda's face because his wife has MS? Whatin the World!
Rich, You hung in there very well and survived the experience. Everyone, in their less viewable way & with less chance of friends seeing it, experience weird, lying, cons artists to a lesser or greater degree. We become strangely attracted and constantly confused by them. What I love about your season was that a really BIG con artist snuck into your lives and you all were strangely attracted and constantly confused by the two of them. This helped me put my own life experience in perspective in that if it could happen to all of you guys, then, of course, it did happen to me. The best that can be said of them is nothing at all. My rule #1: If you can't say anything nice about someone, try to say nothing at all. Congrats on a great season - you and your family are terrifically real.
Well said...BRAVO! I wished we were able to see more of the Amons instead of the foolish behavior of the Salahis.