Cast Blog: #RHOM

Did Thomas Kramer Overreact?

Lea thinks he went too far with Elsa (but is glad she stood her ground).

Confusion, Contradiction, Confrontation, Fashion, Fun, Food and Fights
...and let’s add a large dose of hypocrisy as well!
Wow! This week’s episode had it all:

Let's start with Elsa.

She started the week straightening things out (how James becomes Elaine) and ended it getting voluntarily kicked out of her extended family’s dinner party.

Explaining to Elsa the James to Elaine transformation was a combination of confusion, contradiction, fashion, and fun (and we had a laugh and giggle too).
The Thomas Kramer (TK) dinner party started out fun -- loves, hugs, kisses, and more -- then went downhill quickly with confrontation and fights.
Was I upset Elsa "shushed" me? No. Did TK overreact a bit? Ya think? And in Elsa style, she stood her ground. Good for her. After a 20-year friendship, should anyone be surprised there was some family feuding?

At least when I got "shushed," I didn't take on the diva role, make the dinner party about me and frump out of the room in a noisy huff.Then there was the Pliner Fashion show – just loaded with fun, fashion, confrontation, food, and fights. Seems to start out OK. And of course we got to witness more of the non-gossipers gossip, bringing us to more contradictions. I am always amused by the rampant gossipers who claim to not gossip then talk trash behind backs then lack the backbone to stand behind their ugly words.
This Elaine-Marysol thing could have all been avoided if Marysol were ever up for an adult conversation -- confrontation instead of always running away causing things to boil over. And of course if she didn't continue to interfere with the diva’s red carpet of life. Joanna made a good point -- Marysol backstabbed Elaine and this time she got caught. Oh and Marysol never misses an opportunity to blame me for the problems she brings on herself.

And of course, more "Karentland" bashing by Ana. Always so gratuitous with her uncalled for malicious gossip. Relevance, anyone? And she pointed out Karent "won't hang out with just anyone, only people that bring her attention," as she continues to  bad mouth TK while entering his home and drinking his $1,000 a bottle wine and eating his home cooked gourmet meal. And she was so "offended" by his asking us all to change the subject and have a good time. I'm trying to distinguish between  being judgmental about a dinner party where adults speak about problems and conflict versus a dinner table where families talk about "a--- sex" and "com--- on girls" and "barbeque on p----s." I'm just glad TK didn't mention "wiping his ---," "picking his nose," and "someone’s v-----" before preparing the meal. Confused anyone? Real outrage or phony outrage?And what was the offending joke that so outraged "poor little" Ana? TK asked Lisa if she had trouble stuffing her boobs in that dress. Now you have all seen and heard Lisa during this series... do you think for a second she was offended? Much of her conversation is about her boobs. Her home is the "house that boobs built." Just check out her tagline. Let’s get serious here. Lisa is proud of her figure and how her husband designed it. And why shouldn’t she be? This is phony outrage if I have ever seen it.
Then Ana finally made a legitimate point -- what is Marysol so afraid of? Truth, anyone?
It’s nice to know that Joanna and Adriana are mending fences and we can all go to Bimini together and "bond" (do we really want to, LOL?). Too bad Marysol has to hold a grudge and "never" mend a fence with Elaine. Stubborn, anyone? And who should be forgiving who anyway? Did Marysol mention "twisting stories"?
And then finally Ana sees Marysol won't have adult conversations and doesn’t have her back. So why should she stand up for Marysol when Marysol won't stand up for her? Seems Ana is finally getting it: Marysol would rather play the victim and then sneak around behind people’s backs rather than talk to their face. And surprise, bells ringing -- Ana concludes Marysol "makes herself a victim." Newsflash!
But all's well that ends well. Leave it to a glamorous bombshell to dance on the table of a "misogyny and sexism" host who had the best of intentions and just likes to laugh and have a good time –- well that is until the guests start feuding, fighting, and insulting the host and other guests. Sounds like a typical South Beach dinner party to me. Fine wine, eclectic group of guests, fabulous food, tits, ass, fights and pole dancing. Who wouldn't want to be at this Star Island dinner party?
Things to think about this week:

Do we sometimes have double standards?

Do we sometimes take things too personally?

When we are amongst friends and they disagree are we supposed to take sides? Try to broker peace? Or take a stand on what's right versus what's wrong, a stand on principle, realizing that every friend can't always be right every time, and neither can we.

Do we sometimes just keep digging ourselves into a bigger hole? And then blame others?

When a lot of strong personalities and differences of opinions start up a lively conversation, should we energize it up or shut it down?

When we are invited to someone’s home that we don't like or respect and speak ill of, should we accept the invitation or decline it?

And in the spirit of Thanksgiving next week, do we give enough thanks for our blessings?
Spread the love and keep the peace and #don't deal with stupid.By the way, many of you asked about the handbag I wore at the premiere, it’s my personal design at And if you watched Watch What Happens Live, callers mentioned my face looked “refreshed.”  For all my beauty secrets, go to Enjoy!

P.S. Don’t forget to read my Huffington Post political blogs:, and to learn more about The Consequences Foundation and Blacks’ Annual Gala featured on the show, go to

Tweet me @leablackmiami.
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Hoping to Move Forward with Lea

Marysol shares what she hopes will come out of the reunion.

For me the reunion is a forum to hash things out and engage in verbal mud wrestling and hopefully come out cleansed from the tension and disagreements. I would like to make it clear that I do not hate anyone; I am not a person that likes to live in anger as it only makes you miserable and takes away from the precious moments of our lives. It is no secret that I have spent a couple of years being accused of lying by Lea when we do not see eye to eye on something. It is very frustrating to have issues with someone and always end up at the same place of “her word against mine.”

Unfortunately, my father this year has also had a rapid decline in his health and has spent the better part of the past few months in and out of the hospital. While dad was in the hospital with nothing else to do besides sleep, read, and watch TV he watched every episode of RHOM. He was very upset when he saw Lea saying I was lying when I said she didn’t call, write, or send flowers to mom for 8 weeks. He called me and said to figure out a way to video tape me and put it on that show of yours because I’ve had enough of the lies. My father was by mother’s side every day from the moment she went into the hospital to the day she came home (2 months later). He saw everyone who passed by, saw every flower and card that was sent etc. I truly was uncomfortable videotaping him in a hospital setting, but I was leaving for the reunion and he called relentlessly several times a day insisting I let him speak his mind for the cameras. If you thought Mama Elsa was tough, guess who she learned it from, that’s right, her husband of 52 years, Donald Patton. You never met anyone more ornery, stubborn, or tough, but I wouldn’t trade him for the world.

I have said my peace, which is what I went to the reunion to do. I have moved forward and forgive those who have hurt me and I forgive myself for those I may have hurt. I truly want to move forward to a better place with Lea to the best of our ability. We may never be best friends, but I’d like to think we can at least be in the same room, be cordial, and maybe even share a laugh someday.

It has been a fun season with the ladies and it provided a great distraction from the personal emotional struggles I was going through with my parents’ declining health.  I hope you enjoyed the season, thank you for all of your support and best wishes for my mother as that has been the greatest gift the show has brought us.

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