I had a great time with the girls in Las Vegas! It was so nice to just have fun and forget about all the petty issues and just remember that sometimes girls just wanna have fun! Joanna and I were bonding for the first time, and I did enjoy the effort on both our parts. Every minute spent together was so nice! I sure was on my best behavior and sincerely wanted to focus on the present and hope for the best in the future. Interestingly, I felt more comfortable with Joanna than Lea... She continued to give me the cold shoulder and the mean digs never really stopped, but I had hope, continued being nice, and tried to enjoy everyone's company.
The road trip through the desert was intense. SO hot, it was 117 degrees on the shade! But it felt good to just chat for hours, and it felt like the old times.It was a relief that we got to San Diego in time for the rehearsal cocktail, and a little relaxation in the spa was in order. However, to my surprise, I saw Lea's wrath unleashed on me once more.
I had apologized to her twice already, and I had believed her when she said she wanted to move forward. But she didn't keep her word... Now I see she just gave me lip service and later stabbed me in the heart. She is incapable of forgiving and prefers to dwell on the past.
It is so hurtful to see that her need for punishment and hatred is even stronger than the love for her own son and my son as well. Unfortunately her lack of maturity is so unbecoming, but I can't change who she is. I forgive her, wish her the best, and hope she finds the kindness in her heart to stop hating, because hate only destroys the hater.
I like what their minister said: "...a marriage starts with the vows that you speak." I absolutely agree with that!
I would add that marriage is not a ritual or an end in itself, but a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and choice of partner.
May both our weddings be lasting unions, because there is nothing more lovely in life than the union of two people whose love for one another has grown thought the years -- from the small acorn of passion into a great rooted tree of deep love.I thank each of you for your love and support this season! We are nothing without our fans! I wish you a great end of year and happy holidays to all!
Let's keep in touch!