Bethenny Frankel

NYC's Bethenny Frankel weighs in on the series premiere of The Real Housewives of New Jersey.

on May 13, 2009

Block the bridges and close the tunnels, because this 5 car pileup is going to be a big one. These broads are WHITE-lanta at its finest hour.The hair is as big as the boobs, the French manicures are as white as the Range Rovers. Bring on the bling.

Teresa is cute and sweet, and like Jacqueline (minus the huge rack) she's everyone's friend. We find out early that the major drama of this season will stem from their friendship with that cougar-licious beating of a divorcee.

The hair is as big as the boobs, the French manicures are as white as the Range Rovers. Bring on the bling.

Wow! And people commented on my twins? Where do I begin? With the belly ring? Or with Gucci model? Or with the phone sex? Sweetie, get a toy. She is the controversial New Jersey version of Kim (only the broke version) and those Jersey barracudas are going to eat her alive. What I do like, though, is her ability to be honest about her relentless search for gold, how her husband left her nearly penniless and how she needs sex like a starved animal. The only thing is that I love to watch Kim because she is this larger than life pink, country-singer type caricature. This just feels sad and tragic and Caroline, the female don will take her down like a gold-digging buffalo in the wild.

Where do I begin? With the belly ring? Or with Gucci model? Or with the phone sex? Sweetie, get a toy.

Caroline is the head of the 5 families. Growing up at the racetrack, I know this woman. In some ways, I am this woman. As a kid, I had to live in Ozone Park, Queens for years at a time with this tough broad Pat. Caroline reminds me of Pat. Family is first, more so than any housewife ever. She takes it to a level where she is bragging about her car wash, strip club owning cub like a proud lioness. She's great. I love she and her husband, their love and that they came from nothing. She is the favorite. She is he secretariat in this race. She is the queen in this state where you get in for free but have to pay to leave.