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Letting Loose

Teresa talks bringing baby Audriana home, Gia's birthday bash, and Danielle drama.

By Teresa Giudice

 

How to Watch

Watch The Real Housewives of New Jersey Season 14 premiere May 5th at 8/9c on Bravo and stream next day on Peacock.

Alright, the cork is off the bottle. I’m finally going to let loose on Danielle for all the sh*t she’s been writing about me on her blog. Psycho Bitch! But first, I’m going to start with the happy. My book Skinny Italian actually climbed up the NYT Bestseller list to number five this week!!! I cannot believe how blessed I am to have such amazing, amazing fans. The stories you are sending me of how you are eating healthy, learning to love yourself more, and how your kids are not being as picky – as well as the gorgeous photos of you hot Italian cooks! – mean more to me than you could ever know! Thank you, thank you, thank you! Muah muah muah!!! If you haven’t gotten it yet, it’s just $11 on Amazon: http://tinyurl.com/28z497o. You will LOVE it, baby doll, I promise! Read the reviews and you’ll see why. xxx

It was so fun to see Gia’s birthday party. Gia loved her spa party, even if Gabriella was jealous. What little girl doesn’t cry when her sister gets something she doesn’t? That’s why I made Gia give Gabriella the first ride. And I do have to say, Gia already knows how to ride quads because her cousins have them. We bought a special one for her age that doesn’t go very fast. And my girls ALWAYS wear helmets. We buy them new helmets every single year. She was just excited and took a two-second "happy birthday" ride up and down the driveway.

To answer other questions I saw you guys were Tweeting during the episode, yes Dina and I (and Jacqueline, Caroline and I) were drinking bellinis, my favorite drink in the whole world. So yummy and only 117 calories a glass! I have two recipes for them in my book (as well as a special virgin drink for non-drinkers like Dina). The funky glasses I served them in at my house are Gucci. I got them for my bridal shower gift from my mom 10 years ago. Love love love my Gucci dinnerware!!!

How funny is my Joe? He does not get it, but I am done having kids. Done. When I asked him if he would get snipped, his answer was so funny: "You’ve got the wrong guy." I definitely have the right guy! Love you baby! How great are his tattoos of our girls’ names on his arm? And no, I don’t have any tattoos myself. It’s worth repeating: Would you put a bumper sticker on a Bentley? I don’t think so! (Although I’ve promised my Twitter followers (@Teresa_Giudice) that I might get a tattoo if my book hits number one. That or shave Danielle’s head. What do you think?)

I did think Dina was on crack when she told me she wanted to give Danielle a second chance because I saw through Danielle’s b.s. from day one. If you see, I was never, never friends with her. She just skieves me out. To my Twitter follower @denise676 who wrote about Danielle sitting with Kim G., "I didn't know Disney authorized for Cruella & Ursula 2 b in this scene." – hilarious! Love you! You nailed it. Danielle is Cruella. Did anyone see, was her fur wrap made of tiny puppies?

 

I’m not going to talk about the benefit at the Brownstone very much because I wasn’t there and I think Caroline and Jacqueline and Dina all did a beautiful job explaining it in their blogs. (Although I have to say, the fact that Caroline and Dina stayed home from what they knew would be a big drama proves that they are classy women who have no interest in going after Danielle. And I thought Chris handled himself very well. What a gentleman!)

If you didn’t see it, there is an excellent interview that the father of Emanuela gave yesterday about how Danielle used his daughter’s charity event for selfish revenge: http://shar.es/mJmEO In it he says, and I quote: "Danielle has yet to donate ANY money herself." Not a dime. Thank the Lord, little Emanuela's cancer is in remission. If you want to make a donation to help with their huge medical bills, go to www.emanuelasheartforhope.com .

I see that all of the other Housewives have also included links to ways to help Emanuela – and none of us were even there, let alone “honored guests” – except Danielle. Danielle, who really should know all about how to help this little girl, instead suggests that fans privately contact HER to talk about sending in money. Shady much???

Alright, Danielle, now I’m going to address you directly, you vile piece of GARBAGE. I’ve done my best to keep quiet all season while you call my children names on your blog and write lies about me and my family. Do you even know what "defaming" means, Danielle? I know that you, UNLIKE ME, didn’t go to college, but really, learn some freakin’ vocabulary yourself. To defame someone means to damage their good reputation, character, or name by slander or libel. Slander or libel means lies. Our first problem here is that you don’t have a good reputation, a good character, or even a real name. So it would be impossible to defame you. Second, saying you have big balls is not a lie, it’s a joke. And apparently you are too stupid to even see that it was a joke in your favor. I was actually complimenting you for your bravery. I take it back. You have no balls. You are a spineless, sagging wind tunnel...

 

 

For weeks you’ve been talking about my parenting skills? Are you serious? Are you serious? How dare you! You and me as mothers don’t even belong in the same sentence. What do you think Christine, your 16 year old daughter doesn’t know what you’re doing? Christine even said last year that the guys you bring around only "want you for your goodies." You should be ashamed of yourself. And you don’t even know the ages of my daughters, so you can go scratch...

You actually have the nerve to suggest my labor was just "an act" and rip on me for serving my kids frozen French toast before I left for the hospital? When I was in LABOR??? What did you want me to do, cook them a five-course meal??? Seriously! I cook homemade meals for them every night. Sorry I couldn’t manage it from scratch in between contractions! Before I left, I even made my own bed because I can’t walk out the door without leaving my house in a respectable way. I think it’s hilarious that you go on the TODAY show and do nothing but talk about me. You say I’m uneducated and don’t have a good vocabulary, and then you make up words. You say you don’t know my baby’s name because you couldn’t understand when I said it? I freakin’ spelled it, bitch! How much clearer could I be? Can you not spell? Just spellin’....

I am SO glad you read my book. I’m sure the history of whores in Italy — puttanas — was enlightening, but nothing you didn’t know, right? You think I named a recipe after you? Funny, it’s called "Danielle’s Puttanesca Sauce" not "Danielle Staub’s Puttanesca Sauce." How do you know you’re the Danielle it’s named after? But I’m glad you want to claim the title. Bravo Danielle.

Finally, your hypocrisy reached new limits tonight when you stood there and laughed while your HOMOPHOBIC friend screamed his HATE SPEECH in a public place. Last year, you couldn’t stop bringing up the fact that my Joe used the word "gay" as an adjective. He didn’t mean it disrespectfully, and he wasn’t talking about or TO a person. Then you cry that "Gollum the Make-up Artist," that disgusting man who was spitting in my face at the Reunion Show when I was PREGNANT was 'like family" to you. You pretend to be full of light and love for everyone. And then you stand by and laugh while your friend screams FAGGOT OVER AND OVER at Chris at The Brownstone?!?! As a Christian woman, a human being, and a friend to so many wonderful gay people, I am completely offended, appalled and disgusted by you and your "friend," Danielle. SHAME ON YOU!!! If you think I’m not going to raise this issue everywhere you go now, you are sadly mistaken. You are sad, you are a mistake, and you are sadly mistaken. I apologize to all my sweet, gorgeous, adorable and fabulous fans that you had to read that, but you have no idea what it’s like to be stalked by a crazy person who harasses your family and labels your children as bigots. I think we all know who the bigoted, pathological liar is. PLEASE save your hard-earned money and don’t buy her fictional “memoir” of crap. If you want to know the real truth about Danielle, you can read it here, for free: http://tinyurl.com/27d5klk . Tanti Baci, Teresa

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