Welcome back for blog #3! Let me start off by first re-establishing where my relationship stood with Danielle at that point. My previous conversation with Danielle was left as a mutual understanding that we were to be "peaceful acquaintances." There were too many hurtful things that had been said and done to completely forget about, but we both agreed we were done with the fighting and we both agreed on peacefully going our separate ways. I promised her that I wouldn't talk badly of her and I would acknowledge her publicly, very respectively, as if nothing was ever wrong between us. I wished her and her kids well. She knew my husband also had a problem with her and she told me that she completely understood the situation. She had burnt her bridges and she knew it. I made it very clear to Danielle what my boundaries were with her. My husband preferred me to have her completely removed from my life, but I let him know how I chose to handle my relationship with Danielle and he did respect that. Although Danielle and I wouldn't be hanging out, we would remain on friendly terms. There would be texting here and there when good things came up. There would be a friendly hello if I ever saw her again. My husband and I would argue at just the mention of her name. He did not want her negativity and drama entering our lives. It wasn't worth fighting with my husband over a girl who had already proved that she was not a very good friend.
It was a no-brainer decision to keep Danielle at a safe distance. I realized she was a troubled person that needed help and that I couldn't help her. I believed at the time that she was sincere about trying to change. Once again, I gave her the benefit of doubt. I was wrong about her motives. She immediately started calling me to do things with her, knowing it was overstepping the boundaries we had made. I was trying to figure out why she put me on the spot, and why she made me feel uncomfortable by inviting me to her daughter's luncheon. She KNEW my answer would be no. She was also delusional in thinking that just because Dina forgave her, they were suddenly the greatest of friends. Danielle relentlessly invited Dina to things as well. So why did she invite us to that luncheon? Let me get inside her head for a minute to try and figure this out.
Danielle made it clear when she called to invite me that she was ONLY inviting people who SHE thought would be GENUINELY happy for her and Christine. When Danielle hung up the phone with me after I declined her invitation, she conspicuously said "AWKWARD!" as if she were planning it to be that way. Then she made a very calculating move by putting two empty chairs beside her at the luncheon that her DAUGHTERS should have been sitting in, and makes an announcement as to why we are not there. I had heard from a few of appalled women who attended the luncheon, who barely knew Danielle, what she had tried to pull. I am now questioning the sincerity of her invite. Go figure. I had also heard some lies she was trying to spread around town about me and my family. I also heard she was bragging about her plans to destroy my family this year. She even tried to recruit people to join her. She asked some of the wrong people. ;0)
I was sincere in sending Christine flowers in my absence because I felt like it was the right thing to do seeing as though I was invited and didn't attend. I genuinely meant what I said on that card. The entire message was not read aloud by Danielle. I basically wanted Christine to know that despite the strange place her Mom and I were in, that it didn't affect the way I felt about her. I wanted her to know that I was sincerely proud of her and all her accomplishments, that I wished her the best always and also that I thought she was beautiful inside and out. I feel so bad for her kids because I know there have been so many adult figures constantly coming in and out of their lives so quickly. It's heartbreaking. This episode I see and hear Danielle saying that she doesn't believe I could be genuinely happy for Christine and that I have no relationship with her or Danielle, so why would I send Christine flowers? Which brings me back to my original question, why did Danielle invite me in the first place then? Sounds kind of contradictory to what she was originally saying, doesn't it? I think Teresa may have nailed her "cont"radiction theory right on the head. She certainly puts the "con" in contradiction. Was it ALL a set up? Was this one of her many evil ploys attempting to "bring me and my family down" as she has put it to me before? Hmmm. Danielle, I just may start calling you Saran Wrap because you are JUST as transparent. Shame on you Dirty D! Despicable.
Besides the obvious reason of not wanting to interrupt my bonding time with CJ, the other reason I avoided Danielle's calls that day when she left me that insulting message was because I had already heard what she pulled at her luncheon. I had made my decision to be done with her and her crazy antics. Telling me that she thought I was my "own woman" made me wonder if that was a challenge to get me to turn against my husband. Not a chance honey! Oh that's right...You don't like to be called honey, I remember you telling Teresa that.;0) Why on earth would I choose Danielle over my own husband when she has proven to me over and over again how unworthy of a friend she was to me? Watching that episode just confirmed that I made the right choice to stay away. I was starting to defend her again, thinking she really wanted to change her evil ways, when now it is so clear to me that she had not changed at all.
Christine did a fabulous job at fashion week. She looked absolutely beautiful. Although Danielle claims she has no worries about modeling affecting Christine's eating habits, it appeared to me that she may have something to be concerned about. She only ate two slices of melon after claiming how hungry she was. Hello? Red flags! I hope she learned from that experience and is now eating appropriately. From what I have learned, I don't believe Danielle was ever a model but it seems as though she is trying to live her dream vicariously through her daughter. Of course Danielle is proud of her daughter but she is also Danielle's new money ticket. Didn't she say that when both of her daughters become superstars they could get a bigger house? What makes Danielle think that she is entitled to their earnings? Did she ever consider that her daughters might want lives of their own one day? Just sayin.' Why do I get the feeling that Danielle is going to ruin this great experience for Christine? NOT ONCE as she was talking about traveling the globe riding on Christine's coat tails did she EVER mention where she planned on dumping off her other kid. Jillian will, obviously, still need her mother while she's still in school, doing after school activities and things girls her age like to do. I feel just by looking at Jillian's face that she feels a little left out and can feel the extreme focus Danielle now has on Christine.
I am sooo proud of Gia! She did an incredible job fashion week. I've never seen a kid her age with such confidence. I believe one day Gia will be very successful at whatever she ends up doing. She is a take-charge kind of girl. She will make whatever she wants happen. I just know it.
I have also seen Dina's energist, Zen Jen. Dina got my fertility bracelet from her. Zenjewelz.com. We sage our entire house for protection and to rid it of evil, not just with our Zen jewelry. I agree with Dina that if you believe it works then you are putting the right energy into the atmosphere and you will get something positive out of it. If it makes you feel good then what the heck. As far as what Dina is going through with Danielle and how she should handle that situation, I will hold off discussing that until a later date. I believe that in Danielle's mind, she was trying so hard to become Dina's friend to piss off Caroline because I know how she truly feels about Dina. The comment Danielle made while getting the pedicure confirmed that to me. "Dina doesn't have a problem with me publicly and privately so Caroline shouldn't either." Something like that. She tried to make it seem as if they were tighter than they actually were right after making that dig about Dina working there as a manicurist and stocking shelves. Why would she even WANT Caroline's approval or to move forward with her when she is still stuck on the "Garbage" comment even after a year of no contact with her? It doesn't make sense. When Danielle got mad at me she tried to twist things and tell Dina that I said things about her that Danielle had actually told ME to try to get us in a fight. It didn't work. She would also take things that I did say and twist it to what she wanted to hear and tried to use it against me. That didn't work either. When Dina and I had our little tiffs, like the one we had last year at her Ladybug event, I was always was honest with her and told her how I felt and it went both ways. We have that kind of relationship, as do Caroline and I and we are all forgiving of each other. We are family. Danielle never made Dina and I fight, but the stress of my friendship with Danielle did put a strain on our relationship. I feel like that was OUR choice to let it affect us the way it did. Obviously Danielle can't MAKE us fight, but don't kid yourself; Danielle knew exactly what she was trying to accomplish by trying to put a wedge between us. I felt a little manipulated by Danielle in the end. It's all good now so it really doesn't matter. It's just one of Danielle's many patterns that I've noticed, by playing one against the other.
I hope you all saw a softer side to Caroline this week. She so sweet with the kids. As I have said before, I like going to Caroline for advice even if I don't always take it. She always tells me like it is and helps me to see the bigger picture. Just for the record, I was not brainwashed by my family to ditch Danielle. My decision was solely based on my own experiences with Danielle and seeing and hearing her in action. I listen to what others have to say, but I always act on my own experiences with the person and then I reflect on what others have told me. I look for patterns in behavior. I didn't like many of the patterns I saw in Danielle.
FYI, just because we all are in the same opinion of Danielle does not mean we are ganging up on her. You can dislike someone without ganging up on them. Who is calling whom? Who is belittling a hardworking woman's career as a manicurist? Who is still hell bent on not letting go and is in full attack mode about being called a name by someone who, Caroline clearly stated, hadn't had any contact with in over a year? Who is stalking whom? Who lied and made up that idiotic comment about Caroline owning Kim G. and that she was told to stay away? Who tried to make a table of women think poorly of others who did not show up to an event, when she knew they weren't coming to begin with? Who sent flowers to whose child and who never acknowledged the birth of the other's child even after speaking again? Who is putting whom on the spot when boundaries were previously and mutually agreed upon? Who is challenging whom to go against their husband's wishes? Who is trying to paint the picture that others can't be genuinely happy for ones children when they genuinely are? Who is claiming that they live in the positive and in the love and light when they clearly don't? Who is lying about their whole existence? Who is the one that's blaming others that "the book" was brought out when it was HER SOLE DECISION to put it out there for the world to see instead of just keeping it confined in our local towns where it had been circulating for YEARS and had only just come to Dina & the rest of us when people found out she was entering our lives? Who lies about being a devout Catholic and then lies to and argues with a priest? Who viciously attacked whose kid in their blog? Who, may I ask, is looking for trouble? We're only three episodes in. Imagine what Danielle has been up to when the cameras are off. Pray for us.