Jacqueline Laurita

Jacqueline comments on the toughest scene of the season for her to watch, the Ashley intervention.

on Aug 15, 20110

Wow! That photo shoot for Teresa's cookbook sure looked like a lot of work. When you see the pictures in the book, it just looks like it was all done so effortlessly. I guess some things aren't always what they seem sometimes. It can be exhausting getting everyone to cooperate for a group photo especially when dealing with children. It must have been a long day for them. They seemed tired. Gia tried her best to put on a smile. She is a good sport about taking pictures, even after she's thrown up. LOL! Her kids are trained to put that smile on when that camera comes out, just like little models. After the perfect shot, they can go right back to whatever it was they were doing. I wish my kids would do that. Mine either shut their eyes, turn their heads, try to block it with their hands, or run! Unfortunately, we don't have many, if any, structured family photos. Most of our family photos are candid shots of them playing happily just doing their thing. I really do cherish those memories, and so will they someday. I like to put them in scrapbooks that I've made. When they grow up, I'm going to make copies of the scrapbooks to give to each of them. I want them to look at those pictures and remember those happy moments with a big smile on their faces like I do. Congratulations, Teresa, on the success of your new cookbook.

Kathy and Richie were so cute discussing whether or not to have "the talk" with Victoria. Rich seemed like he was afraid Kathy was going to tell (or teach) Victoria something that she didn't already know, and that it might backfire because it might just sound appealing to Victoria and she may want to investigate and explore further! He couldn't even say the word. He had to spell it. (S.E.X.) I'll be honest with you, Richie, nowadays most kids by sixteen know more than we would ever be comfortable talking to them about. The internet and word of mouth can answer anything they are curious about. Maybe even too much info! You still should have that moral talk with your children. Now is the time Mr. Wakile. Kathy is right. I know it's hard to imagine your little girl growing up, but it's something out of our control. I bet Rich will feel different when it comes to that "talk" with his son. It will be more like, "Make sure you keep condoms in your wallet at all times." LOL!

483 comments
ashbrw
ashbrw

Your family is a lot like mine. You remind me of me. I am a single mother of a lovely 3 year old boy. His dad reminds me of Ashley. He lives at home, hasn't worked in 3 years, and doesn't pay his child support. He is verbally abusive to his parents that pay for everything he needs; gas, food, cigarettes, you name it. And these people have no money.I go to school, raise my son, and work. My baby daddy reaps all of the benefits. He gets to have him without any interruption from work or school. He doesn't have to pay one cent for anything for our son. I understand what you mean by working so hard and the ex getting to reap the benefits. That's exactly what I am going through. While my ex is cancelling visitations to go to football games that he can somehow afford, or going spending a fortune on going out and drinking, I am going to school and raising our son. It's very frustrating. I really hope you show Ashley some serious tough love. That is the ONLY way she will learn to appreciate you.

Momma J
Momma J

Jacqueline, you are an amazing mother and your situation with Ashley is not really that unusual and unexpected. She is doing what many young adults do, but is being thrown into the public spotlight while doing it. If she was at college now, she would be partying and acting irresponsible, but not in front of you, your younger children and the public. Let her leave, move wherever she wants, but put limits on your support. Perhaps looking into a college or art school, providing tuition and living expenses (very modest) room & board or a modest apartment. Then let her make the life choices she has to make to become an adult. She will make mistakes, we all have. But, she will learn so much more by doing it away from the eyes of her loving family. I have 3 young adult children (ages 28, 26, and 23) and all have made good and poor decisions, but are all on the path that I hoped and prayed for. You have given her the lessons and tools she needs, now you must give her the space and freedom from the media and her parents to mature. She will soon become the adult woman and friend that you both need and want. Trust her and yourself and give her the freedom to fly. Your role as a parent is changed now. There is a strong foundation to build on and it will get stronger every year. Be patient, have trust and both of your dreams will come true. Believe in yourself as a parent and believe in Ashley as a young woman ready to grow up in her own way.

Lisa in Ohio
Lisa in Ohio

So Jacqueline was it that Tre didn't want them making money???? or did she not want them using the problems between them as a way to get on the show and air it all????? But thank you soooooo much for sharing all the things Tre has had to market to make ends meat, since their financial trouble!!! Do you not see how Melissa and Kathy are towards Tre???? Go to Melissa's website and see where she compares rooms in her mansion compared to Tre's house, She even compares their kids bedrooms, trying to show others that she has more than Tre!!!! I wonder if Melissa wormed her way on the show, to just get another thing Tre had, some fame from being on TV?????? Try being a real friend!!!! I had thought better of you!!!!

Tonyalr14
Tonyalr14

Jaqueline/Ashely, I have never left a comment on anything before but... I wish I could help Ashley see how wonderful it to have a mother in her life that cares for her. I am 31 years old and my mother died when I was 8 months old and my brother was only 8 days from turning 2 (freak accident). She was 17 when she died. Age, money, non of that matters, It is having someone there to tell you it will be ok or to hug you just the right way or to help you the all the girl stuff. I will never have that in my life so I hope that Ashley finds away to appreciate that in her life. Ashley you have an amazing family that cares for you , so stop and think what it would be like to have never of had it at all. When your mom wants to talk to you or say hi don't hit ignore. It may be the last chance you ever have to talk to her. This is a quote I read to myself before I start everyday. "Life: Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever." by Mahatma g Ghandi. So live with no regrets because who knows if there will be a tomorrow. I pray that you and your family finds the happiness that it deserves.

Thanks for you time, Tonya =)

Jean in Rochester
Jean in Rochester

Hi Jacqueline, I know that teenage girls can be the worst things to deal with - I have two of them; sometimes they are sweet, and sometimes they are really nasty. I think you have been frustrated and not really talking with Ashley on a one-to-one basis without anger getting in the way. I thought it was a really bad idea to buy her an expensive car ($500/mo.!). She just needed something to get around town in - spoiling her will not make her respect you. I would make her provide you with a plan for how and where she is going to live in California. (What job will she be looking for, how much will an apartment cost, does she know anyone out there? ) Provide her with some help for her first month's rent, and then she will be on her own. If she goes to school, offer to pay for the tuition, but she has to help with the expenses (which you can determine). She needs to have some personal investment into the situation. Make her do some research on what she expects to do in California.

Doughboy
Doughboy

I thought finding this would be so arudous but it's a breeze!

Sukey
Sukey

Stay infroamtive, San Diego, yeah boy!

Chasmine
Chasmine

Haahhaha. I'm not too bright today. Great post!

WOW Mean Girls
WOW Mean Girls

Wow, great friend you are! (not)

Teresa mentioned resenting the fact that her family used animosity towards HER to get on the show for their "get rich" schemes. I don't think she faults them their get rich desires, just the methods used.

I guess with friends like you and Caroline, she doesn't need enemies like Danielle. You're mean and fair weathered.

Pedro Mom
Pedro Mom

I'm sorry for the heartache you are going through with Ashley, Tough Love, let her go wherever and it's on her to figure it out. Sometimes we give to our kids cars, clothes, money because we think this one thing is going to make it better for them, what really needs to happen is they need to do it on their own to gain the confidence that they can accomplish something. It strikes me odd that she cant get it together for Lauren. Why would she have to go to a graphic artist if she has the talent? I thought those Blue Eyes artwork she showed to your Dad in that episode was very beautiful, why not present that to Lauren as something to put on the t-shirt. Ashley is crying more then she is not, there is a disconnect between what she perceives and what is real. If she is partying now big time and with how she comes across on camera, I would guess trouble is brewing for her. It would appear that you and Chris and her Dad have jumped though hoops to meet he needs, sorry to say she is spoiled, self-indulgent, manipulative, weak, and immature. Time to set this little bird free, Ashley time to grow-up and figure it out for yourself.

Texan
Texan

I love all the housewives on this show, but I also can tell where loyalties and personal values lie with everyone. I love Teresa and hope her life gets better, unfortunately, I can now see that not only are her family members throwing "knives" in her direction, but so are her friends! I thought better of you than this. You have opened doubts in my mind about your true values. The way you brought this to everyone's attention about Teresa was not very friend-like and, if I were her, I would feel betrayed. Why couldn't you go to her face with it? That would have been the respectful and drama-free way to handle this. You stooped even lower than her by responding at all. Shame on you for thinking that this was right in any way. Oh, and on Ashley. I feel for the pain you are going through because I remember having a similar relationship with my mother, but you need to remember that she is the child and you are the adult. You need to seriously learn how to disengage with her when she acts ridiculous because it makes you look like a fool and that's why she won't take you seriously. Let her go to Cali and either grow up or fall flat; she's an adult now (technically), so let her go try and be one.

cruzing through
cruzing through

It's not like Bravo is going to post this anyway, but here goes! Jacqueline, this too shall pass! I think you handled things the best way YOU knew how at that time. I find it interesting that people are so quick to judge what they see in your life (we see really a fraction of your daily life) there are probably 20 different instances where Ashley and Jacqueline have done or said things that we don't see but are referenced on the show. Don't be so quick to judge.

As for the Teresa comments...Jacqueline was just talking about how SHE feels about it. Frankly, Teresa has gone through a lot this season, but has done little to show she has integrity toward her friends or family. Teresa talks about "family" like it's the most important thing to her, but the actions I have seen on screen have been the opposite. She "was" trying to get Jacqueline and Caroline to dislike Kathy and Melissa. Let them decide for themselves who they like or dislike. Jacqueline has tried to be neutral for a long time, but there comes a time when you get tired of being a doormat and decide to comment on certain things.

Please take into consideration that this stuff went down MONTHS ago and it is entirely possible that all parties involved may have made amends! CALM DOWN everyone! This is not YOUR life, but THEIRS! Get your OWN! It's TV!

Way to Go!!
Way to Go!!

Jacqueline, you are a loving mom! Although it seems your daughter is ungrateful, for her sake I hope she sees the "light". She seriously needs an eye-opening & a dose of humility. You have done your best now it is time for her to grow up & make her own decisions! Thank you for responding to Teresa's blog... I do not in any form or way see it as bashing. People who write that DID NOT get what the truth. You were simply giving your opinion & responding to what Teresa herself has started. With Melissa & Kathy, it seems they are just getting negative vibes because of Teresa. People are not giving a chance to get to know them. So glad you didn't follow the crowd! Teresa is a constant trouble maker & problematic, even if she is your friend she is making huge mistakes. I can see you & Caroline giving her advice but she is so hard- headed! All the BS that Teresa & her ridiculous husband say is so negative & immature. She needs to take a long hard look at herself! Stay positive! Chris & you have a wonderful family!

bacham
bacham

Jacqueline, I loved you blog. I have felt after watching the show that Teresa has motives to hurt everone in her path. You and Caroline have treated her very well and she is obviously crazy and has serious issues. Kathy and Melissa have been made out to be the bad guys. Teresa plays the victim very well. Melissa has made a lot of effort to make things work between her and Teresa and Joe. Teresa and her husband are toxic and there is no getting past that. I really like dTeresa in the past season but she has changed. Is it her husband and the legal troubles? Who knows. Jacqueline, I too am divorced and have a child. I think that I gave him everything because of guilt and I felt that i always cut my son a break. I had guilt about his father not being around. Ashley will come around. Maybe she needs to live by herself to realize how difficult it is. You are fantastic.

Bravo fan from PA
Bravo fan from PA

If I sat sobbing in a bathroom and had just encountered yet another awful public argument with my daughter, I can honestly say I wouldn't be rushing to a computer to rehash it all. No blog from Jacqueline--I don't blame the woman a bit!

Theresa C.
Theresa C.

I hope that you will read this. Thank you for letting that scene in with ashley. For my son has broken my heart right now. I am living a similar situation, see my son was supposed to move with me from CA to WA. I went ahead with my new husband to be (who by the way is like Chris), my son was going to fly up. The night before my son was to get on the plane he tells me that since he is 18 he is not going to get on the plane. That would be ok if he had a diploma or a ged. My heart is broken right now and I cant breathe. I am two states away and my friends are worried for me and my son. They say it is tough love, yes it is very much so tough love. I just want you to know that you are not the only mom out there we are all out here. Thank you for sharing your life and this blog. Ms. Theresa C.

Amanda Bahler
Amanda Bahler

I have to say that I loved the blog. I think the things you wrote about Teresa were very true whether she would want to hear them or not. I like Teresa but I think her way of going about things is all wrong. And as far as Ashley goes, I feel for you. I have 2 girls and a boy all under 5. I don't know what it's like to go through that as a mother but I put my mother through some pretty tough things in high school. And now I can't even believe I did some of the things I did to her including getting into a fist fight with her. I'm sure Ashley will come around but I do think you are doing the right thing by kicking her butt out. I can say from what I put my mother through and the way she handled things with me, Ashley IS going to have to hit rock bottom before coming back up. So do exactly what you are doing and CUT HER OFF! My parents did it to me but were always one step behind me, not saying anything and letting me make my own mistakes. Among those mistakes were a string of abusive relationships, one almost ending my life. But I chose to ignore my parents and do what I wanted to. I learned the hard way to listen to what my parents were telling me. The only thing you can do is let her go but still be there for her just as a friend and someone to talk to when she needs it and make sure she is safe. It really made me see things clearly and get my head on straight. My children also helped with that. I had my first one at 23. I am 27 now and was just married in July and have a wonderful husband. I also started to appreciate everything my parents have done for me. But if you keep pushing her its just going to push her away. My mom did well in handling an out of control child and now she got to see the final product. My husband and I may not have much, but we have three beautiful children and a roof over our heads and most importantly our family is as close as close can be. So trust me, give Ashley that push out the door and stick to it! And when she finally does get her head out of her ass, she will acknowledge everything you have done for her and spend the rest of her life trying to make it up to you. You will see her succeed, I know it! Good luck and take care!

Sharon from NY
Sharon from NY

I hope you are feeling all the love from parents, moms, kids out here. I have definitely been in your shoes. Sobbing, cannot speak wondering where I went wrong. But I know that while my daughter and I may be having a tough time, we will be OK in the end. She always comes home when she is in trouble because home is a safe place that she can count on. Not all young women have that, and my daughter and your daughter do. Someday this stron, demanding, controlling personality will make her a sucess. But for now, it just makes waves. You are a good mother who raised a good child. All God's blessings to you and and your family.

Regan snyder
Regan snyder

I have a blended family to.I'M 37 and was also blessed like you to have an amazing Man in my life to be a dad to my Daughter.I live in Colleyville and I know the way kids can be..You and Chris are doing great..Ashley will get it together..This has nothing to do with you..It's so easy for us to blame ourselves since we were young moms,but at a certain age they no right from wrong..Keep up you faith.giver this over to God and he will take care of it..He is the author and perfecter of our lives..my heart and prayers God bless Regan

rhonjviewer
rhonjviewer

Wow.....with friends like you...no wonder Tre feels like she does!

Marivela785425
Marivela785425

Go Jacqueline about time somebody called Teresa out she is the one that needs help>>>

1055
1055

Ashley is in need of professional support. She is crying out for attention. I believe that she is probably jealous of the fact that she did not grow up in a traditional family unit but is now observing her siblings, on both sides, living in that sort of environment. At the age of 20, she may need to find a man who she can build a life with. She can now have her own children and correct the wrongs that she believes ruined her life. Unfortunately her attitude will probably inhibit her from forming a solid relationship if she fails to get professional counseling.

Calimommy
Calimommy

I so feel your pain, my stepdaugher could have been Ashelys twin UNTIL we kicked her out and endured a few months of hell. She tried to come back over and over but my husabnd finally let me do things my way, TOUGH LOVE. Well in the end it worked. When she realized she wasnt coming back she got an apt with two roommates started working two jobs and eventually we agreed to help pay for her to go back to school at night, IF she kept her job and her grades up. She did both. In fact I am proud to say she is now in her 2nd year of law school. I always say its not how they start but how they finish. She is doing us and most importantly herself proud. It took going to hell and back, and sometimes with certain kids thats what it takes. Best of luck, my opinion on Teresa...stay away, she is bad news and has noones best interest at heart.

susanw
susanw

Very disappointed in the way you bashed Teresa!

kathy 123
kathy 123

I FELT SORRY FOR ASHLEY. TO ME IT LOOKED LIKE A GANGING UP SISUATION, WITH YOU, CHRIS, YOUR EX AND HIS WIFE. I FELT SORRY FOR HER, SHE COULD SAY NOTHING OR DO ANYTHING. I ALSO THINK THAT YOU ARE THROWING THERSA UNDER THE BUS. SHE HAS ALWAYS BEEN NICE TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY. HER SISTER-IN-LAW IS A NUT

Viewer 1
Viewer 1

I love you Jacqueline, I think you are a great woman. Don't pay no attention to these people on here who are saying negative things about you writing to Teresa. I can't stand her and I am glad you stood up for the way you feel, whether it's in a public forum or not. What's the difference if you said it on T.V.? Everyone would have saw that too. Teresa does act like everything is for her family or she's so loyal, it's all bull crap. Danielle did offend her and this is why she got mad. Like I said, I can't stand her. She's one of the biggest phonies. But keep doing your thing and being you and you'll go far.

Jacqueline Hater
Jacqueline Hater

You are a horrible mother and a terrible friend. All you do is think about yourself. Grow up.....and stop wearing so much make up. Your husband should leave you and take the kids and your daughter would be better off without you around. With a mother like you who needs enemy's??

BAMF'N Mandy
BAMF'N Mandy

Dear Jacqueline, I would like to begin by telling you what a wonderful woman I think you are. I know being on TV and having your personal life spread across America can not be easy(an understatement I'm sure), and I have been watching the recent episodes and I can relate to your problems with Ashley. I am 23 years old and I went through somewhat the same growing-up process that Ashley is currently going through. I was wondering if you are familiar with the term 'Indigo children'? Lee Carroll and Doreen Virtue are two superb authors who have great information on this subject. Now if this doesn't apply to you than I am sorry for the personal intrusion and I hope the best, but if it does I have to tell you it really helped me come to terms with who I am and how to find my passion and drive. If Ashley is an Indigo child I can relate to her, and I will tell you it is not easy to live with an Indigo child, I am sure my mother would agree with me on that :)! I was always so lost in life and felt like I didn't belong, no matter how many people were reaching out to me I felt that no one could understand me. Then I realized that it was me that didn't understand myself. Well if this applies I hope these reading materials will help all of you. If not like I said, sorry for the personal intrusion. I think all of you ladies are quite wonderful and I hope the world falls at your feet! Best wishes, Mandy

Jackiefan99
Jackiefan99

All of you who are bashing Jaqueline for her comments regarding Teresa need to CALM DOWN. Nothing she said is a lie. Teresa said and did all of the things that Jaqueline mentioned, and Jaqueline is absolutely right in what she says in response. Teresa is a hypocrite, and she talks out of both sides of her mouth constantly. We see something happen on the show WITH OUR OWN EYES, and then flash to Teresa's interview where she tells us either (1) what we just saw didn't happen, or (2) what we just saw happened differently than it actually did. She is never genuinely happy for the successes of others. She is unraveling right before our eyes.

You go right ahead and keep voicing your opinions, Jaqueline. If people don't like to hear the truth, then tough noogies.

Rachel M
Rachel M

come on lady! post your blog already!

Viewer
Viewer

UMMM all I have to say is go back and watch the first two episodes!!!!!! I am very disappointed in you.........your bashing of Teresa in this blog just made you look bad!!!!!!!!!!! Melissa and Kathy are not fooling anyone......MEAN GIRLS!!!!!!!!!!

MMMontes
MMMontes

I was reading the first page of your blog and the comments that were shown below prompted me to “read on”. People are criticizing you of being well… critical of Theresa. I kind of think that it’s o.k. Sometimes you love a person & never say anything of their discerning qualities. I’ve loved my best friend for years but it took a break down for me to be able to tell her that she was way too controlling. Maybe a blog isn’t the best way to do it. But maybe it’s your only outlet. At this time, it seems as if Theresa isn’t too open to criticism, even if it may be constructive. Remember too, that constructive criticism isn’t constructing anything if no action is taken. There is too much yap on the show right now. Coming into the season sans Danielle it would seem that it would be a fairytale to some degree. Why do many of you criticize and hate each other to some degree? I think if one were to take a serious step back, watch the seasons and identify toxicity, you may identify yourselves. I don’t think I’m all Dina at this point, but I’ve read a book that really helped me and think it might help you. It will also make for a really boring show but hey, I personally would rather know that you guys are loved and love each other. For some distorted reason, we’ve involved ourselves in your personal lives and actually care about you. It’s called the 4 Agreements, look it up. I did, and although I don’t practice the agreements 100% the majority of the time it helps me to be happier and love more, best yet, like more.

COFFEEMOM3
COFFEEMOM3

You are ABSOLUTELY CORRECT calling Teresa out for being a "hypocrit" about loyalty!!! She flipped the table in season 1 to get "camera time" so she could be the "drama queen". No Class! I was horrified when I saw her chasing Danielle through the CC like hunting an animal. I know Ashley was given the sentence but the judge should have demanded Teresa be brought in on charges for "assault, malice, etc". Teresa, the INSTIGATOR, is no different then when one yells "fire" in a movie theater that causes pandemonium!! You are a better friend to her than she'll ever be to you or anyone! Greedy, yes, you're correct: not just with whining about someone else making $ but jealous. Watch your back with Teresa because she's "no friend". Why would she "invite" Danielle to prove anything and not just let it be? I believe you when you forgave Danielle as it takes too much energy (negative) to continue anger. However, you use your common sense that God gave you and Teresa wasn't in line that day, can't make wise decisions or sold it to get a few extra baubles. Teresa can be toxic too so just be CAREFUL:)

LisaDJ
LisaDJ

I so wish I knew if you read your blogs....I would be happy to tell you that Ashley will come to admire and respect everything you have ever done for her. I was kinda like her at that age. I thought I had it all figured out, but now I am approaching 40 and I have the upmost respect for my mother as I have gotten older. My mother was married at 17 a mother at 18. She had 5 children by the time she was 32. The reason I'm telling you this is I came to realize the sacrifices that were made for me. Ashley will come to need you more than you know. Thats the mother-daughter bond. We have to make our stands as young adults until we realize one day "oh my gosh, my mom was right?" Lots of luck to you guys and God bless.

COFFEEMOM3
COFFEEMOM3

You are lovely and my favorite! My heart aches for you with how Ashley treats you and Chris. Don't despair! Pray that the Lord guide her, protect her and give you the strength to endure as God has a plan for Ashley. My suggestion would be to send her to Caroline's, let her work at the Brownstone washing dishes and make her attend therapy. It's not your fault nor Chris, ex-husband, etc. If she refuses, then allow her to make it on her own. She'll either recognize how hard life can be or when the going get's tough, the tough get going! Win-win either way. Removing her from your home so she can "grow" is the best thing! Caroline will have her back and it will give you/her time to "heal" so Ashley can grow. You both tried many different ways to reach her and HAVE NOT GIVEN UP! It is obvious that you, Chris, family all love her. Unfortunately, "hurting the one you love" is often the case. Ashley KNOWS YOU love her so she feels entitled to "push" boundaries. It's not a parenting flaw, it's from within and only she can change it as you are "changing" your methodology in dealing with her. Best of luck, hang in there and SEND MY BEST TO YOU!! COFFEEMOM3 ATLANTA, GA

juliog22
juliog22

best blog ever your great someone had to say it... if I hear Teresa talk about being all about family one more time and then act the way she does towards them in the manor she does I was gonna lose it.. if anything you talked to Danielle way after Teresa stopped she should have never included you in that grouping. I usto enjoy Teresa but this season her true colors are showing...

Gingertee
Gingertee

Gee Jac, why couldn't you be this honest with Danielle.

jhonanna
jhonanna

Hmmmm ! I honestly and truthfully like you, melissa, and caroline, and teresa and kathy but when drama or issues come around its like who am i going to team up with or something like that you know what i mean right. as far as you and ashley go i have to say that i was like that when i was her age but i have changed a whole lot because i have 3 little ones it takes time and alot of dedication and alot of thinking but she will change that i am sure of it. I love you as a mother and i agree that what lauren said is true ashley all what she wants is attention and its not about that. and teresa oh well the only 1 thing i like about her is her cookbooks and her cooking and her family and the fact that her and her brother with his family are getting along. as far as kathy comes along oh well she is good at cooking to and her family is like of da hook for real. god bless you all!

debbieinmissouricitytx
debbieinmissouricitytx

Jackie, what a uncosmopolitan blog on your friend! You have some misplaced anger and resentment when it comes to your friends and family. My daughter use to be crazy about you and after you put your finger and ahsley face and demanded that she watched her siblings....was enough for her to say....you have some serious issues. First you need to address the resentment of having to raise her alone and stop blaming her for it. Then treat her with respect and she will do the same

Jillian
Jillian

I really don't see what was so mean about what she said in her blog. You people throwing a fit are the drama queens. Lord have mercy, she didn't wish her family dead she said they behave well and act like models which, from what i've seen on RHWNJ, they want to be one day.

Emily Whitehouse
Emily Whitehouse

Jacqueline, I am not a mother, but I can, hopefully, provide some advice for you. I do not agree with how Ashley is treating you and Chris, but I understand exactly how she is feeling and believe I know where her anger is coming from. I am 27 now, but when I was 20, I definitely had the same type of anger and attitude towards my own parents. Being older now and having a little more life experience, I can now look back and understand better. It's all a miscommunication between you both. Anger is not a real emotion...it is ALWAYS a mask for another emotion. In the scene where Lauren is talking to Ashley, she hit the nail on the head...Ashley feels like she is a disappointment in your eyes and that nothing she does will make you feel different, so she gave up trying. I know that it appears that she is not making an effort with you, which in reality, yes she isn't...but she honestly thinks she is making some effort. Life at that age is difficult...I really think she is extremely lost and does not know what to do with her life. She still doesnt know who she is and what she wants, so she is avoiding it by partying and occupying her mind with friends and having fun. I think she is already disappointed with herself for not having a path and every time you try to guide her, she takes it as you pointing that out to her and rubbing it in her face instead. My advice to you is to let her go. Let her move to whereever she wants to go and pursue what ever she wants to pursue. Be supportive, even if you don't agree with it 100%. Don't tell her she is making a mistake or tell her "I told you so" when she fails, because she will fail at some of it. Just be there for her to talk to and try your best to not be condescending or sound like you're lecturing her. Only give advice if she asks for it. Do not support her finacially, but more emotionally. That's all she wants from you. She doesn't care about the financial part of any of it. I promise, all she is looking for is for you to be emotionally supportive of her. Help her move if you can. What I mean by this is, make a trip out of it...pack up the car and make it a road trip. Help her move her furniture..do not buy her furniture, but maybe help her find some from a friend that's giving stuff away or go to a garage sale with her. Wish her luck and tell her you love her and that you're PROUD of her. I promise, those are the words she is longing for. I know this from personal experience...all my life, I felt like I was a disappointment and that no matter what I did or how hard I tried, I was never good enough and it weighs you down. It really demotivates you. I'm not saying that you think that about her or tell her that, but that is what she is hearing. I hope this helps and I really wish you two the best of luck and I promise that it gets better. It will take time, but it WILL get better. I always wanted to be best friends with my mom...all my friends seemed to have that relationship with their moms except for me. I can't say that we are best friends now, but our relationship has done a 180. It took a long time to get to this place, and we are still working on it, but it will happen for you..just be patient and try to let her go just a little :)

Tux
Tux

There seems to be quite a bit of criticism on this week's blog but I personally like this far better than the lala happy blogs. This is real. This is what Jacqueline is feeling truthfully so I hope people wouldget over it.

Jacqueline, she'll come around one day. Hang in there.

Alexandra Allis
Alexandra Allis

Jacqoueline, Today I told my daughter to leave our home today for the same reason you told Ashley to leave. My daughter told me I was not a good mom because I don't have money. The screaming around her brothers that goes on all the time was a huge deciding factor. I tuned in tonight and so my life playing on TV. As for the other blogs I read above I say "Unconditional love is absolute," however, " Entitlement, disrespect and parental abuse does not fall into that category. She wants money. Tough love is tough plain and simple. When your daughter hurts you, your life and yourself become so different and we tend to lose our own joy and everyone and everything appears deceitful and having an agenda.

Until you have been hurt by your child (not including families suffering from addiction problems) after giving everything you have for decades then you get to judge. It is the worse pain!

You are lucky to have a supportive husband. Here's to our daughters finding their way. One day they will realize but it won't be today.

Dezi
Dezi

BRAVO PLEASE POST Jacqueline, You're an amazing person. Don't believe any of these ignorant post that defend Teresa. You call it like it is. Everything that Teresa says or does is a LIE. She's a dilusional, jealous person. STAY AWAY FROM PEOPLE LIKE HER! You don't want crazy negative people like Teresa in your life or near your children.

CTgirlnTX
CTgirlnTX

Jacqueline, First let me say that I think you jump over Ashley. I'm not saying she is perfect, I think she needs to do volunteer work at a women's shelter. Maybe it will make her see how lucky she is. On the other hand, since watching the show I have seen, she has no one she can really talk to. No real support. Caroline keeps saying "she calls me auntie Caroline" even though she is not my real niece". You mention the name Ashley in that family and they all act like she's a leper. You have Chris to support you, who does she really have? Also, I think Teresa's blogs have been more directed to Caroline and not you. I think you are taking it way too personal and not really seeing or reading what she means. I don't know what has gotten into Caroline this season with Teresa but, she seems to have issues with Teresa.

kathyb3343
kathyb3343

I know just how it is. Have raised 5 daughters of my own, plus 2 step=daughters. Tough love is the way to go. I do not have your resources, but sometimes you just have to let them not like you for a bit. Eventually, they will realize that mom knows best. 5 of my girls graduated from college, 1 still in school. Have hope for the 1 left out. 3 daughters have Masters, 1 has an Associate degree and is in school, and 1 just a sophomore. I have 9 grandbabies. Girls are the best..they ultimately stay close to mom. It is hard to be "mean," but they need to learn responsibility. I am an RN, just retired at 61 on disability. Girls are the best in the end.

another mom that knows what your going through
another mom that knows what your going through

Jacqueline, I am a mother of a teenage girl. I felt so bad watching this years episodes. I know what you are going through and when you had your breakdown I knew how you felt. I cried with you because I could really feel your pain these kids just think they know it all and unless someone has gone through this they dont know how it is. I am learning to let go, it is the hardest thing for me to do but until or unless she starts to show me respect and appreciation I cant let her back in. You are doing the right thing this is a very tough stage in their lives and I really dont think kids these days have the maturity that we did when we were younger. Good luck with this situation and know you are not alone.

Viewer Kim
Viewer Kim

Jacqueline, I have watched your conflict with Ashley and it is like watching my relationship with my own 21 yr old daughter. I cried watching the last episode because I know how hard it is to have a child you sacraficed for and do so much for treat you so poorly it comes down to telling them to leave. I see my daughter being a complete different person to others, doing for them and being so kind yet to me (especialy) her stepdad and younger sisters so hateful and disrespectful for no reason at all. Just a simple phone call to her at the "wrong time" and is sad the way I am spoken too. Her stepdad also has done for her, many things her own father hasnt. It seems she only wants us to do for her with absolutely no appreciation or her respect. I/we gave her 6 months to find her own place a couple of months ago. We even tried therapy too with out much result. She moved out last weekend and is even more angry at me. We have not spoken in a week and I have not seen her apartment. I keep up with her on her FB account to see how she is doing. I too am trying the "tough love" approach which will unforntunately include watching her struggle and learn things the hard way. I have tried every other alternative and like you, just can't live with the abusive behavior in my home and around the rest of our family. I am struggling also because I still love her and miss her as I know you do with Ashley. This is not the relationship I planned to have with my child either. I sympothize with you and my heart goes out to you. Wishing you all the luck and support that both our mother/daughter relationships will improve as they learn some of lifes lessons. Hang in there!

Scilitime
Scilitime

Jacqueline, Wow, I am not sure if you will read this and I never respond to blogs but the situation you are going through with Ashley breaks my heart! I was in tears right along with you when I watched the episode. I felt your pain!!! I know the heartache. My mom has always told me, "No one can ever break your heart like your children can." Recently I have been going through a situation very similar to yours. My son is 15 and has been sick his entire life. I have been a single mom for 11 years and averaged 3-4 hours of sleep a night throughout the years, missed countless days of work all to take care of my son and he all of sudden turned on me and insisted on living with his dad that he barely knows, he yelled at me, insulted me and in less than five minutes made me feel like a worthless mom. When I heard your cry I cried for quite some time...hang in there...sometimes we just have to let go. Trust in the truth because your heart knows it and someday Ashley will realize it too. Head UP!

ScillyD
ScillyD

Jacqueline, Wow, I am not sure if you will read this and I never respond to blogs but the situation you are going through with Ashley breaks my heart! I was in tears right along with you when I watched the episode. I felt your pain!!! I know the heartache. My mom has always told me, "No one can ever break your heart like your children can." Recently I have been going through a situation very similar to yours. My son is 15 and has been sick his entire life. I have been a single mom for 11 years and averaged 3-4 hours of sleep a night throughout the years, missed countless days of work all to take care of my son and he all of sudden turned on me and insisted on living with his dad that he barely knows, he yelled at me, insulted me and in less than five minutes made me feel like a worthless mom. When I heard your cry I cried for quite some time...hang in there...sometimes we just have to let go. Trust in the truth because your heart knows it and someday Ashley will realize it too. Head UP!