Jay Mohr

Episode 14: Jay Mohr finally agrees with Ashley about something.

on Aug 21, 2011

Teresa and Joe Giudice are at their lawyer’s office. Joe is dressed in a plain black sweatshirt and jeans, Teresa is dressed like Cruella DeVille. After a small discussion, Joe muses, “Never tell the truth!” I would like to disagree with him, but during this entire scene I have no idea what this lawyer is saying. Why do lawyers do that? Hey, Mr. Bar exam. Dial it back a little. I barely got out of high school! To paraphrase Denzel Washington in ‘Philadelphia,’ “Use small words and use a lot of them.” Teresa shouldn’t have to figure out that her liability has been extinguished. The lawyer should have just looked at her and said, “You’re cool. Joe, not so much.” Instead the lawyer treats us to some regular guy conversation pieces like, “Joe the perception was clearly that you committed an action which precludes your discharge.” If I had a dollar for every time I overheard that at a barbeque, I would have ZERO DOLLARS. No one should talk like that! I think the only reason lawyers talk that way is to Jedi mind trick us into keeping them on retainer so long.