Watching the RHONJ women pack for this trip is like watching the Pyramids being built. It just seems too impossible to complete. These gals are bringing so much clothing to the Dominican Republic that I think they are going to open a Forever 21 store there. Guys don't pack as much as girls. If a guy is on vacation for two weeks, he packs just ONE bathing suit. Granted, at the end of the trip the swim suit might smell like a skunk farted, but we stick with the date we brought to the dance. You may call it disgusting, we call it dedication. The Real Housewives of New Jersey are bringing enough wardrobe changes to the D.R. to bang out a production of Moulin Rouge by lunch.
Lauren is explaining to Caroline that she has a suitcase for hairspray and jewelry. It's never a good idea to visit a poor country and have a local bellhop carry your jewelry bag up to your suite. It seems like you're rubbing their noses in it.
Everyone lands safely in Punta Cana. I love a country that has dancers at the airport. We should try that here in the states, especially at JFK. People could step off of twelve hour flights from Malaysia and see rival hip hop crews break dancing next to Hudson News. Out of all five hundred and sixty three pieces of luggage, only Teresa's gets lost. My guess is that Joe Giudice tipped the skycap at Newark airport to throw it off the plane somewhere over North Carolina. It's nice to imagine a double wide filled with hillbillys have taken a break from cooking meth to try on enormous hoop earrings.