At Gia’s gymnastics event, it’s obvious that Joe Gorga is going to be late and miss all the good stuff. Gia is really good and looks like she really loves gymnastics. It’s a weird scene because all of the little girls are dressed like Data from Star Trek. Gia is visibly nervous about whether or not her Uncle Joey will show up. In the uneven parralel bars, Gia does amazing and sticks the landing to a score of 800! (Is 800 good? I have no idea, I just like Gia.) Finally, after all the gymnastics have been gymnasticated. Joe Gorga and Melissa show up. I understand the concept of being “fashionably” late, but these two were “miss the entire thing” late. Joe Gorga and Teresa make nice, which for them is very nice and even Joe Giudice is civil. I actually didn’t think the meeting of Joe Gorga and Teresa was uncomfortable even considering their lateness. What I found excruciatingly uncomfortable was Melissa acting so freaking angry the whole time. Why was Melissa pissed? Damn girl, you just got a 20-year-old Italian kid to come to your home and write you pop songs. Celebrate. Melissa can barely walk into the gym from the weight of her own attitude. This really surprised me because in the last episode it really looked like Melissa was going to be the peacemaker between Teresa and Joe. Maybe Melissa is angry because she is once again wearing the hat she got from the set of Blossom. In her interview, Melissa says, “I feel empty inside.” Well, I suppose you are. These children all love each other and this petty feud is starting to bum me out! Watching Gia and Antonia hug and play and laugh is perfect and genuine and real. Then we cut away to the adults and Melissa is angry for no reason at all (it seems). Hey, memo to Melissa…YOU were late. The entire gym is filled with people that got there on time. YOU need to seriously take a moment and realize that Joey IS talking to Teresa. They ARE getting along. Joe Giudice is on his best behavior. Oh, wait a minute… you did realize that. That’s why you are so angry. Everyone is starting to get along and that infuriates you. If the family gets along, you might get pushed to the back of the line. You CANNOT let that happen can you? No, and you won't. I am slowly starting to think that Melissa is a boring Danielle. At least Danielle really thought that people in white coats were coming to take her away. Danielle hung around with great, fun guys like Danny. Danielle had a criminal record. Melissa is beginning to give us all of the psychological mind games with out any of the fun that should come along with them. Joe Gorga and his sister Teresa have finally made a great deal of inroads with their feud. It’s nice to see. You can tell that the two of them really love each other. Melissa immediately goes home and sits Joe down and explains to him in some strange, Danielle-like way that she is being disrespected by his family. Then poor Joe Gorga, who was so close to mending his and Teresa’s fence completely changes his mind and tells Melissa that his family needs to love her more or they are out. This was a difficult scene to watch. Not as difficult as watching Melissa sing but difficult none the less. Watching Melissa manipulate Joe was like watching Bugs Bunny outsmart that big red monster that wore Converse sneakers. It was just too easy and too sad.
Leave a comment below because they do get read and that’s how I know how many of you are reading the blog. Reach out to me on Twitter @jaymohr37 and don’t forget to watch what happens.
Your blog is really great. I look forward to it every week. You are right on the money about Melissa. Keep writing!
Love your insights and humor...It's getting to the point where I watch the show and wonder what you'll have to say about all the insanity. Thanks for a great blog and making me laugh every single week. You're awesome.
I looked forward to your blogs! I'm always on the lookout for them after each RHONJ episode! I love your "Miss Personality" comments! Ashley is just a classic, spoiled brat, hopefully she'll grow out of it.
Thanks for being funny!
Jay, I find your details about hats, people's expressions and all the the ridiculous grammatical errors to be a riot! It would be so fantastic if you would write about the other housewives shows because your perspective is exactly the humorous reality check everyone needs. Thanks for making me laugh!
Jay, we saw your stand up several years back in Vegas when we lived there, but we loved you even before then, and love you even more now. Your blogs are the best and put a funny, yet real spin on what's going on. You should have been doing these blogs a long time ago. I would have loved to hear what you had to say when Teresa flipped the table in the first season. These are still the best housewives so far. Miami was such a yawn-fest. Please Bravo, do NOT bring these hussies back. Anyway, keep writing Jay!! We love you out here in California!!
LOVE your blogs! They're great. You need to recap ALL of the Real Housewives, I'd love to hear your take on NY.
LOVE your blogs. Why can't you blog for all the Housewives shows! Yours is the first blog I read each week. Hilarious!!
Your blog is FANTASTIC ! I can't stop laughing ! Melissa and her sisters shopping for couture clothing at a strip mall. Only in Jersey!
Jesus, J, I love reading your blogs!!!!!!! I even got my husband reading them. I, like many of the others that commented, literally laugh out loud when I read them! Please keep them cumin.....haha!
love it. can you write on all the housewives??? you are spot on and put a funny spin on it. people in my office think I am crazy laughing out loud!!!
LOL Jay. Your blog is the best!!! Keep telling it like it is...especially about that Melissa and her attempts at singing. I look forward to reading your thoughts about next week's show.
I just had to read your blog with my hand over my mouth so I wouldn't laugh out loud. You KILL ME!!! You're so on point with your assessment of everyone. This is becoming the highlight of my day.
This is very funny!!! What exactly does Joe do to have a house like that? Maybe he sells hats in bulk!!
What I love even more about your blogs, other than being hysterical, is the feeling you put into them besides the jokes. Such as being concerned about the kids and the love between Teresa and brother Joe. Thanks for intertwining the humor and the seriousness of the storylines, you do it very well. I think we all love G to the ia and it's great that you show her respect as well. I watch the episdode, read your blog, then re-watch the episode to catch the things I missed, such as the baby cribs in the Guidice's bedroom! Thanks again for another fantastic blog!!
You are HILARIOUS!!! I am crying at work bc I cannot stop laughing while reading this on my lunch..please never stop!
Your insights are so right-on and honest and hilarious. I'm really glad that you are writing this blog because it makes watching the episodes even more entertaining. Keep up the good work!
Jay, your blogs are hilarious! BEST EVER...I love the point of view and humor you put into every detail!
Jay I love reading your blog. I no longer read anyone else's just yours. You always tell it like it is...
JAY, ur talent shows in everything you do, even a little blog shows how hilarious and witty you are. Melissa is definately the cause of all the drama i cant put my finger on it but you did it for me. poor joe g he is so full of his own poison he doesn't see how much his own wife is spoon feeding him. love your blogs and i follow you on twitter now just because of them.
I have never commented on a blog before, but I had to...I am losing it over this. You are so funny! Bravo- "pay attention, puh-lease" have him blog about all of the Housewives!!!
OMG, u are so so so funny. Love love love ur recap. U must know a Melissa in real life to get her the way u do!!! And her sisters, too old for backup, hahahaha. I have to change my panties on that one!!!
Amazing Jay...How sweet the sound...when I laughed my ass off reading this blog! Thank you and may God bless...
I absolutely love reading your blog!! And the comment about Melissa's attitude was spot on.....she her biggest fan!!
Jay, your recaps are sooo funny. You are spot on with everything, especially how Joe does not see how Melissa is manipulating him! Keep them coming, I look forward to reading them every week!!
Jay, it is clear that you have many people reading your blog but... I am HOPING that the "players" are reading it as well. It is usually helpful to get a 3rd party non-biased perspective. Okay who am I kidding?!? I would LOVE to be a fly on the "New Jersey" wall when they are discussing (word used loosely) your perspective;-) My only disappointment is that I don't see your blog on the other cities housewives!!!
Jay, I think that I get more excited about reading your weekly blog than the show at times. When Melissa sang wench instead of wretch, I knew that you would catch that. I hope that Andy invites you to the reunion show. Keep up the good work!
OMG! I had to hide my computer because I am at work! I spit out my drink several times. This blog is AWESOME!
I would enjoy watching the Real Housewives of New Jersey SO MUCH more if it displayed little thought bubbles containing Jay Mohr's witty comments. Jay rocks!