How about those bracelets that Caroline had designed for her kids. I loved the concept and idea behind it all -- An honor and commitment to each other to never break those ties. Caroline, I hope you don’t get upset if I decide to copy your idea one day.
While families are coming together during the holidays, I know that I am not alone when I say that these gatherings can be "the most wonderful time of the year" as well as the most stressful time of the year. So many Christmas movies are made each year that highlight how this time of the year forces everyone to think about unresolved family issues. While it is much easier to sweep all the issues under the rug, that does not make them go away. I myself am guilty of that as well.
I completely understand how Teresa and her husband must have been feeling before going to Melissa and Joey's home for their Christmas party. After all, this was the first time that the entire family was going to be together again after baby Joey's christening. I am glad that they did decide to come to the party despite their apprehension. In that same spirit, I have always tried to do the right thing. Unfortunately, my intention to clear the air was again misinterpreted. I too had my own reservations about being together with everyone under one roof since the christening. But when Rich and I drove up to the Gorga house that feeling was quickly dismissed. I felt that we had stepped into a live Hallmark Christmas card. Their home was beautifully decorated, no attention to detail was overlooked. Everyone was definitely in the holiday spirit.
When Joe and Teresa arrived I immediately wanted to try and put things behind us. It took so much courage for me to approach her again, since she shut me down at the Posche fashion show. I was hoping that maybe she would be receptive. What is so wrong about approaching my cousin at a Christmas party and trying to share a moment with her? How can we move forward if we can’t let go of the past? We haven’t talked since Posche, so I wanted to put this ridiculous fight behind us. Instead of faking it and sweeping the hurt feelings under the rug, I wanted to explain where I was coming from and put the issue to bed, that’s all. But Teresa didn’t give me a chance. Her quick dismissal really took me by surprise. I am the first to admit that I am not perfect. I only try to do the best that I can, and in spirit of Christmas, it felt like the right time.
KATHY...I FEEL THAT YOU ALWAYS SEEM TO HAVE THE WORST TIMING. TERESA FEELS VERY BETRAYED BY YOU AND SHE SHOULD.. YOU SHOULD HAVE NEVER BECAME BUDDY BUDDY WITH MELISSA UNTILL THEY STRAIGTEN THEY RELATIONSHIP OUT.. YOU WERE LIKE HER "SISTER" AS YOU LIKE TO SAY.. A LITTLE LOYALTY TOWARDS HER WOULD'NT HAVE HURT.. A LIL EXAMPLE: SEE HOW CAROLYN TURNED YOU DOWN BECAUSE SHE IS TERESA FRIEND AND BEFRIENDING YOU DURING A TIME WERE YOU AND TERESA ARENT GETTING ALONG JUST WOULDNT BE RIGHT.. ..ANYWAYS.. NOW IT SEEMS LIKE YOU WANT TO FIX THINGS BECAUSE MELISSA AND TRE ARE TRYING TO WORK THINGS OUT... TERESA IS GOING THROUGH ALOT IN HER LIFE AND THE LAST THING SHE NEEDS ARE PPL WHO ARE LOYAL TO HER AND HAVE HER BACK WHEN OTHER TRASH TALK HER.. YOU MY DEER.. HAVE NOT.. I DONT BLAME HER..
Kathy, Maybe if u really want to clear the air with Teresa, then u have to do what she(Teresa) and Melissa did. Y'all need to sit down and have a talk without the distractions and all the family and friends around. U keep wanting to talk to her in public places, so try having a private conversation just the two of you. This is only an observation, but your way isn't workin, so if u really want to be close again try a different approach.
Kathy I understand wanting to work things out with family, however I think maybe your timing has been a bit off. Why not just call or go over to Teresa's house and speak to her one on one instead of during an event with so many people around. I love you and your family and I hope it all works out for you and the Giudice's.
You should have just said hello and moved on. Teresa said a polite hello but than you tried to provoke her into something.
why don't you try calling theresa and inviting her over? It seems you and melissa wont do that. Just your family and theresa's. It would probably mean a lot!
It seems to me Teresa politely told you it was nice to see you as well, but you couldn't leave well enough alone. It seems as though you only wanted to make peace with her because Melissa and Joe are trying to. Perhaps a one on one with Teresa would have been better than trying to hash things out in the middle of a holiday party.
Kathy, you shouldn't feel like Teresa humiliated you—her words and actions, they were a reflection on her and the nastiness she has inside. It's clear you had the best intentions and for whatever reason, she can't get over herself. Never feel bad for doing the right thing!
Seriously Kathy....you make it sound as if you just approached Teresa casually at the fashion show when in fact you attacked her parenting skills that night. There is something very wrong with all you people, it seems like none of you have any sense of "time and place". The fashion show was not the time and place to try to talk about personal issues and neither was the Christmas party. You know where Teresa lives and I'm sure you have her phone number why wouldn't you just call her or go to her house and talk about your personal issues instead of a public event or a party in someone's home - it just doesn't make sense...You make yourself out as someone just trying to make things better - use your head and do it the right way in private!!!!
Hi, Kathy I appreciate you putting the video with your post but after looking at it again...my feeling is when you approached Teresa and said it was nice to see you and she didn't bite. That should have been the end of the conversation until she approached you. When yo said "no..Really" started the fire...Teresa and her husbands were already tense and on guard. I would be too. I do really feel you are trying to fix the relationship between you and Teresa but I don't understand why you just won't go and talk to her alone...why is it always at an event. People are more open to listen in private...just my thoughts..
Kathy, You threw the first stone by pointing out that Teresa's child was alone at the christening. You approached her at the Christmas party and she was cordial and said it was nice to see you. That should have been enough for you to walk away. But no...you chose to try to clear the air and that WAS NOT THE TIME OR THE PLACE. Obviously you do not know where Teresa lives nor her phone number so you aren't able to do it one-on-one? Also your crying in the bathroom was so typical high school....You need to quit crying on everyone's shoulders when things don't go your way. Grow up.
This is my own observation. I think u have gone about this the wrong way & still nothing's resolved. You have tried to talk to Teresa twice without the results u had hoped for,maybe u need a new tatic. I'm thinking y'all need a private place to have this type of conversation. Something like what Melissa and Teresa did. It's obvious y'all shouldn't be having these type of conversations at family functions anyway! Try something else & maybe you'll get the reconcilliation you're looking for.
Kathy, Yes, you did try. Yet, nicities were exchanged and then probably should have just stepped away. By going back to Teresa it only made her more uncomfortable (that's what I saw anyway). It seems if something is pushed upon her, she definitely does NOT do well. Probably would have been best at another time/place. As far as the language and the closet---holy cow! Did your husband say he was going to blow the house up? I honestly wasn't sure with all the f bombs flying around! I'm no prude, but I would NEVER want my children hearing that come from my mouth---esp about a relative! Yikes!!!! Won't be the last argument on the show and it's sort of sad, yet expected. Hopefully you can try to sit with Teresa alone but I wouldn't attempt a public venue. Things go south quickly with you two!
You may always try to do the right thing, but it seems to always be at the WRONG time, Kathy. Do I believe you truly want to mend the relationship with your cousin, yes I do. But first you need to get a few things right in your own head and heart. You keep insisting Teresa owes you an apology...it goes both ways. I can't speak to anything other than what we the viewers see on the telly and read in your blogs. In both of those instances, we see true mean spiritedness from you towards Teresa...do you think she doesn't see that as well? You owe her an apology as well and the right thing to do is be the first to offer one, not insist on one. You need also to figure out timing. A fashion show and the home of a friend during a party are NOT the proper time for clearing the air. You had it right approaching her and saying it was nice to see her. She responded cordially and you should've let it go at that...baby steps. But you pushed. You say you can understand her apprehension coming to the party, yet you failed to recognize her discomfort being there at first...and you pushed. The best way to mend your relationship is to wait till the right time and do it the right way. Call her and ask if the two of you can talk...then go to her and apologize, a heartfelt apology, not the I'm sorry, "BUT" type of apology. Extending the olive branch is all well and good...poking the bear with said branch...not so much. Give the woman a chance to get her feet back under her with her brother and SIL...THEN do some fence mending of your own.
I noticed your sister seemed to have no one on one issues with her. In fact, knowing how you felt right after speaking with Teresa, she still had no issue and spoke quite cordially with her...Maybe that should say something to you?
I truly do not get how it is so hard for FAMILY memebers to not understand the pressure and stress one of their own is under and continue to push that member...and then claim to be "all about family". If you love her as you say you do, try...just TRY to show a little compassion. Would it kill any of you to maybe sent a card or note after some of the horrid press about Joe and Teresa makes the rounds and say "OMG, my heart breaks for you...I'm here if you need a shoulder...in spite of anything in the past."?
You call yourself a Christian and 2 seconds later you are cursing like a sailor...wow Then that was so disrepectful of your husband to call your "cousin" such nasty words. I thought you italians put no one above your family, after all blood is thicker then water in any race. Shame on you!!! I don't blame Teresa for giving you the cold shoulder, you are so two face (once again I thought Italian families stick together) but you chose to side with Melissa and her family at the Christening , when you knew they started it (thanks to the alchol). Being the "Christian" you are, you should have stepped in and attempted to make peace with brother and sister but instead you blamed and judged Teresa. I wonder how God will Judge you come judgement day?!?!?!?!
HMMMM. I didn't find your approach to Teresa very authentic. You say your intentions come from a positive place but your timing is so OFF!! Ask your cousin to lunch or start with a phone call. You always catch her off guard and it's very fake! That's why she gets upset along with the rest of us!
I don't feel you are sincere at all. And let us NOT forget, if it wasnt' for Tereas you wouldn't be on the show at all!!! I think you put on a "I'm just innocent act...I've been watching housewives long enough to spot a phony when I see one.
Teresa was cordial to you. She engaged in the phony kiss kiss you offered and wished you well. It was only when you tried to feign a reconcilliation for the cameras that she got annoyed.
There is nothing genuine about you. You have been playing to the cameras since the opening episode. If you were sincere in your intentions you would have been knocking on Teresa's door weeks ago, not waiting for the cameras to film you at a holiday gathering. You talk smack with Melissa an Kim G and then expect Teresa to welcome you with open arms. Get a clue. And a new schtick.
Kathy, I like the fact that you want to mend fences with Theresa but choosing the Christmas party to do so was not a good idea. You should have reached out to her prior to the party one on one. Makes me wonder if you are trying to keep the drama going...
This is the first time ever I am watching your show, I have no knowledge of the past history of any of the ladies on the show. I also never comment but, after last night’s episode I have a few comments & advice.
First – Kudos to you for being the mature Classy Lady & trying to mend with Theresa but, I am not saying you approaching Theresa was a bad idea, however there is a time and place for everything! Bad judgment on your call, that was not the time nor the place. When there are hurt feelings, animosity & anger it just can get downright ugly, not to mention you are degrading yourself, Theresa & your family. Now I know this was pre-taped a while ago so I am hoping you guys have mend your differences in the comfort of your own private homes. Hug it out……life is too short!
As for Melissa, she has yet to blog but, I wanted to share some positive feedback. Kudos to her & her husband for their actions at the party. She shed new light on my eyes with her excepting, loving, behavior towards Theresa.
As for Kim G- I will call her a girl since she seems to be offended by someone addressing her age. Kim G------GET OVER IT!! Leave the drama alone & stop adding fuel to the fire!! Blood is ALWAYS thicker than water!!
Kathy...when are you going to learn that parties and events are not the place for a serious conversation about "working things out". Have a sit down, privately. Even your partner in crime, Melissa will tell you that. Saying that you were trying to clear the air at the fashion show was confusing. Accusing a mother, especially Teresa, of leaving her kids alone, is not the way to clear the air. Capice?
It's sounds really nice the way you explain it after the fact but that's not what I saw. Teresa was being civil, said hello and even asked about the kids. If you wanted to talk about your issues you should have invited her out for coffee. Do it in private, why at a party when tension is high and you just want to get through it without any problems. Your timing was off and it seemed fake to get a reaction for the show.
Kathy, Quit Whining about how Teresa treats you and Grow up! If you want to mend fences with Teresa call her, set up a time to meet and quit trying to talk to her at events... Also quit crying on everyone else's shoulder. Namely Caroline. We could all see that all you wanted to do was undermine Teresa's relationship with Caroline and Jacqueline (so does Melissa) because it is obvious. Kim G has been trying to kiss Caroline's A** every since she first appeared on the show and now you are emulating Kim G....Sad.
It's sounds really nice the way you explain it after the fact but that's not what I saw. Teresa was being civil, said hello and even asked about the kids. If you wanted to talk about your issues you should have invited her out for coffee. Do it in private, why at a party when tension is high and you just want to get through it without any problems. Your timing was off and it seemed fake to get a reaction for the show. If you really wanted to clear the air you should have done it BEFORE the party.
I must say, I was not surprised at your response to Teresa's comment. Anger and finger pointing seems to be something you're really good at. I understand that we viewers don't get to see the everyday stuff that goes on but from what we've been shown on Bravo, it's no wonder Teresa questioned why you suddenly were interested in speaking to her. All we've seen from you is Teresa bashing.
You getting so psycho crazy over T's response was so over the top... but it was what I expected. LOL Always the little drama queen, thinking just because you open speak to T, you think she should respond positively to you. Well, I'd respond negatively to you too after all the BS you've been spouting about Teresa and her troubles.
What did you expect??? Gratitude that you finally spoke to her without some sort of accusations? You got what you deserved.
You went into the party looking for a way to spark Teresa. Your conversation with your husband as you were driving made that clear. I thought your approach was fake and not sincere. After everything you have said and done on air to bash Teresa, I do not blame her. It was a set up with Melissa and her family just like the christening and you know it.
Kathy, It WILL work out someday. I know you felt it was time to approach Theresa but I don't think she thought it was good timing. Probably wasn't, considering the whole family was standing around watching you two. Best have that conversation at your homes or off camera. Rich is a good guy and you have a great heart.
I don't understand why you went to find Teresa as soon as she arrived. When you tried to approach her at the fashion (in a public place) it wasn't successful. Did you really think you were going to resolve your personal issues in a middle of a Christmas party. Although I am not a fan of Melissa it was right of you to approach her at Melissa's party. Also you were so worried about what Caroline thought about you that you went to her house to talk. You claim family it so important but only confront Teresa in public places. Why not meet Teresa with no camera rolling and you two could work it out that way?
I like you, Kathy. You have such a wonderful supportive husband. I thought it was really funny how mad he got. That's true love for you. Mending family relationships can be especially difficult and I admire you for trying and trying. I love Teresa and am a big fan and can understand to a certain extent how she must feel betrayed because she thinks you chose Melissa over her. This is what I get from watching. I'm sure there is a lot of things we haven't seen or know when it comes to your relationship with her. That said, I really felt for you last night. I don't know why she wouldn't hear what you had to say. I was in a similar situation with a cousin I had grown up with about 10 years ago. What's sad is I can't even remember what really got us not talking to one another. I always meant to apologize to her for anything I might have done that had hurt her. Before I could she passed away unexpectedly. The guilt that I've carried around since has been a heavy burden. I'm heart broken that I wasn't ever able to embrace her and tell her I loved her regardless of the tensions between us. I can only pray she knows that I love her and am sorry. The point is, keep trying with Teresa. You won't regret it in the end. Sorry for the long comment. P.S. You and Rich make beautiful children.
Why do you always choose to talk to Teresa when everyone's around. She's your cousin, why not call her an talk with her alone face to face without anyone around???
Kathy - I am Teresa #1 fan but I really like you alot and I think you did the right thing. I am sorry you felt so hurt- keep your head up! I adore Teresa but it doesn't mean she is always right. She was clearly wrong in this situation.
I don't know you obviously but your behavior on the show is shameful. You speak about having a clear heart but your actions are so manipulative. The worst part is that you are so subtle with your manipulation and that you constantly talk about how you have a clear heart. Really, clear heart? If that were the case you would spend your time highlighting the positive and defusing tense situations instead of doing otherwise. You attacked Teresa at the fashion show and then acted so surprised that she wasn't warm towards you at christmas party. It is really very sad and disgraceful and apparently your husband won't tell you but you should really know and reflect and listen to what you say and what your actions are.
Two things- if you didn't want to add to the drama of the night- why did you even approach her? She had just walked in, she had not found her bearings. Secondly, with this said, the converstation went well, cordial if you will. You had to poke the bear, and continue to say "No I really mean it." Why not walk away after the initial exchange? You brought that on yourself. You knew she was going to blow.
Lastly, ( I know I said two things) but three it is.....I thought Rich might be the most "flawless" character this season- but when he refused to go walk up and speak to his family......seems like more drama to me.
Check yourself before you wreck yourself.
You picked the wrong time to have a heart to heart with Theresa I think. Also, I think you need to guide your husband into using better language. That was absolutely offensive. Be the christian woman you claimed to be and lead him by example. His behavior was classless to say the least.
Whether or not you are able to work things out between you and Teresa, it's obvious that you tried. As I read your blog, I immediately thought of the instances when I have felt the same way. You put yourself out there and are your most vulnerable and instead of it working out as you hope, you get crushed. I can only assume it's because Teresa was at a point where she felt attacked in every instance and you were an easy target that night. I can tell you that as a "Jersey Girl" I have loved watching the show, but it has been hard to watch because of the tension and fighting among family members. You and your husband and children are bright spots in the show and I hope it's something you ultimately enjoy doing because it's great to see a happy, traditional family representing the Garden State. You guys are hilarious and remind me so much of my own family. I think we're definitely going to borrow your idea about the contracts for our children. It makes a lot of sense and is a great tool for communicating with teenagers and young adults. Mine are still little, so it's going into the memory bank for now. Thanks again for being you and again, I hope things work out for your whole family.
kathy, why did you get emotional, please explain.You told Teresa once, that you was glad to see her, why you had to keep pushing the issue?
I think that you were trying to be nice but you also started it! She said nice to see you once so let it go walk away, Joe was nice too said Hello kissed you on the cheek and that was it but you went right to Teresa saying more drama that could have been avoided.
You embarrassed yourself Kathy. Your reaction was over the top. Why the hell did you insist on getting in Teresa's face when you knew all she was capable of mustering was a polite "hello, how are you?"
If you gave a damn about repairing the relationship with Teresa, you would've gone to her house with flowers and baked goods (like you did with Caroline, who you had never met but once) and asked to talk it out. But you didn't. Instead you talk about Teresa badly and hug her enemies.
With you as family, all I could muster would be a polite "hello, how are you" too before I screamed at you to get the hell out of my face.
Kathy, I think in both occasions you picked the wrong time to approach Teresa. That is something you have to do in private not on camera. How did you think she would react? At the fashion show you were way out of line and so wrong in your what you thought really happened. It was not your place at all to say anything to her. Teresa is very strong willed and no nonsense. Trying to show yourself as "the bigger person" backfired because is wasn't sincere. I wouldn't accept your "nice to see you" at that time, on camera, when tensions were high and she and Joe were already approached by Melissa's brother-in-law about money in front of everyone. You should know better than that! Italian woman are very emotional and passionate but we aren't stupid. You and Melissa are gossips and pot stirrers, I think Teresa is "the bigger person" for not airing everyone elses business. Try not focussing on Teresa every time you are being filmed, you come off looking like a troublemaker. If you really want to make things right, talk to her alone...
I admire your intention, but maybe it wasn't such a good idea to keep pushing when she clearly wasn't very receptive when you approached her. You kind of set yourself up for that one.
Really Kathy? You thought Melissa and Joe's Christmas party was the time to approach Teresa and get things settled? How about a phone call or a letter sent to her house apologizing? You didn't want to do anything to take away form the party were your exact words - but yet you did!
Kathy, I commend you for "trying" to resolve the past with Teresa. She shows that she can be difficult to talk with because she just pushes people away that she feels are hurting her. Richard seems like he is a great spouse and is there when you need him and I love that about him. I personally loved your Christmas tree especially the topper.
Kathy, I'm sure the entire situation at Melissa's was tense for everyone. I admired you for approaching Teresa and telling her it was nice to see you. She tried to be cordial and civil by telling you it was nice to see you too. I'm not sure why you couldn't just accept that from her, when you could see she was trying to leave it at that and move away. When you followed her, you would have been better served to say something like... "I'm sorry if I ever made you feel bad or hurt you, please don't be mad at me anymore, let's start over". But you didn't. When she didn't jump up and act like your best pal, you called her an effin' b**ch. That's doesn't sound like someone who is sincere when they say it's nice to see you. When she said "now you're glad to me?!", that was your opportunity to understand how you've been making her feel and put things right by apologizing to her for turning your back on her. As a viewer, you've left me scratching my head about whether or not you're sincere. How sincere do you think Teresa believes you are?
All you kept saying was "it's really good to see you" and "no REALLY it's good to see you".. what kind of response were you expecting? It looked like she had just got there and was trying to get something to eat, did you expect her to get into a deep conversation right then and there. Say hi once, give her a hug whatever and move on. You made the effort, your heart was in the right place, get over it. If she wants to come around she will, let it go.
Here's a little hint, work out your family problems in PRIVATE, not at a holiday gathering where Tre already feels she is under a microscope. And Rich's comment, that he would burn the [expletive] place down? How nice of him to do such a thing for you. TRUE COLORS are showing.
I think the party felt like the right time for a reconciliation to you. But for Teresa, she needed space to handle the party and survive. It was already a difficult night. I think since Teresa was already suffering a lot of public scandal and shame, instead of approaching her on camera and in public, if you wanted that reconciliation, you should have reached out to her privately.
No one can make you feel small and pathetic. It is your choice how you react. You and Rich's language was shocking. You pride yourself in remaining in control and rising above but at a minor slight you lose it. Will the real Kathy please stand up? I'm beginning to think there is a distince separation between the Kathy in the interviews and the Kathy we are seeing interacting with the women. If your actions match the interviews, we wouldn't be able to resist liking you.
I think the Christmas party was wrong time, wrong place. You should have called Teresa and met for coffee if you sincerely wanted to make up with your cousin.
You said it three times though. Honey, your just coming off as too agressive. Say hello and wallk away. Wait for another time to talk to her. I think at that point, you were the last person on her mind. She was very emotional and tense. Coudn't you see that from the show last night?
Why does it come down to when your ready. You should have backed off and told her that after the holidays you wanted to get together with her and talk to her one on one.
You certainly could not have picked a more inoportune time.
Kathy...do this over lunch at a private setting. Not in the middle of a public event. "We haven’t talked since Posche, so I wanted to put this ridiculous fight behind us." Considering what you just said why would you approach her for the first time at a party...again? Your timing is awful. I'd think you knew better.
I try to give you the benefit of the doubt, but your husband is annoying in the "blame game" department, shut up- it's family! Family does suck sometimes, and mine is old school Italian- we make up. How about going to Teresa's previously and trying to put your differences aside next time, not in front of everyone- your timing just isn't good, sorry girl...