Kathy Wakile

Kathy explains why she wanted to talk to Teresa after the fashion show.

on May 23, 20110

As I sit back and watch this episode, I can't help but get caught up in the beauty of autumn. All of the rich and bountiful colors of New Jersey's harvest season, simply gorgeous. 

It was really fun to watch everyone gather together at the Laurita's to carve pumpkins. The kids really seemed to be having a great time, and Jacqueline was certainly in her comfort zone surrounded by the large gathering of family and friends. 

Seeing all the kids in their costumes brought back great memories for me. I sure do miss the days when Rich and I would gather together with our neighbors and all of our children and make our way through the neighborhood. Halloween is so much fun for everyone. Victoria and Joseph went off to a church youth group party with their friends, so I'm glad Rich and I decided to have some fun as well. That evening sure did have a few surprises! How hysterical was Joey working his gold, leopard dress!  

After the Gorga christening, Rich and I invited Melissa and Joey to come over and talk without the kids around. As you may have noticed, when things got out of hand at the christening, we tried to remain as calm as possible. Getting all of the children out of the room was our initial concern realizing that any more involvement would just make matters worse. Rich and I immediately gathered our kids, my mother, and sister and decided to leave. We felt so bad for Melissa and Joey. They were distraught, and we wanted to be there for them. We have known for years that there were issues that stood in the way of the Gorgas and the Guidices having a healthy relationship. As we all know, families are very complex. Their history and emotions have many layers. The outburst at the christening certainly did not occur from just a simple "congratulations."

As I said at the dinner table, "Sometimes things have to get to be the worst before they can get better." This was it. Rich and I wanted to try and help, even if it was small steps toward a resolution, we had to try. We thought the best way was to encourage both Joey and Teresa to meet and discuss what was bothering them. For Rich and I it has always been best to talk face to face. We've always felt that when you look into the eyes of your estranged loved one, you can see past the anger to the glimmer of love that will always shine through. Because with families it's not always bad, there's always so much more good. With that thought I had made up my mind that if the opportunity presented itself, I would try to speak to Teresa. I normally would not involve myself, but in this case, I witnessed their fight and the backlash. Things had gone too far.

361 comments
WHATHA
WHATHA

U did come off as you had already pick a side (joe and melissa's)..Ur intention might have not been to insult Teresa's parenting skills but u did and thats y she lost it on you...And Did you not watch the christening episode, Joe Gorga started everything, he lost it on Teresa and all she did was say congratulations and lets just say for arguments sake that she was not being genuine or authentic by saying it, was there really any reason for Joe to go off like that at his SON'S christening...He ruined the christening and he's too blame for it turning out that way...Teresa's is not at fault for anything at that christening even after he called her garbage she walked away....

limelight
limelight

You need not say anything... Taking sides and talking behind Teresa's back. Then you confronted Teresa of all people at the wrong time... lol... Joey married his sister! Teresa is a little ruff around the edges! However, he found a woman like his sister who ironically hates his sister! It's hilarious!

Just don't say anything... so silly... Reality TV...

SouthWest Florida Viewer
SouthWest Florida Viewer

How does that saying go.... "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." Yeah, that's the ticket.

I've seen your kind before. Passive aggressive. Hope I'm wrong. You know, for all the kids sake.

cgclark
cgclark

Kathy, I thought the way you approach Theresa was one sided and judgemental. How can you talk to someone about a problem when you have already taken sides. And I also agree with Caroline. It was not the place or the time. If you were sincere you would have called Theresa and invited her to lunch or something to talk about it. I don't know, but Theresa went over to the table to speak to her brother and he flipped out like a crazy person. And then everyone blames Theresa for the blowout and wants her to apologize. Wow!!! I understand there are underlying hard feelings but you do not air your dirty laundry in public. I mean that is the way I was brought up. In the future, being a peacemaker means being able to listen to both side objectively and offer resolutions. What you did was make more trouble and add to the resentment.

rodarteangel1973
rodarteangel1973

Katy, Teresa is your flesh and blood you are on the wrong side. Your true colors are coming out real quick.

PVH
PVH

Kathy: Your another one that stirs the pot and your husband is no better. I do not get it? Who cares about the fall!!

RabbleRouser
RabbleRouser

Kathy, get out while you still can. I see too much human decency in you to want that doesn't bode well with this freak show. Run Kathy...run

kymmers82
kymmers82

You seem okay, but I would believe you were more genuine if you had called Teresa and invited her over or to meet you out...not approach her at an event with other people around. It seems to me you and your husband as well as Joey and Melissa spend a lot of time trashing her and talking behind her back.

cee cee
cee cee

Hello everyone, Lets all try to remember that Theresa is probably playing up to the cameras and with all the editing, we really don't know what the entire story is. I am sure that this family feud is not one sided and Theresa is as much to blame as anyone. Kathy was just trying to get the sister-in-laws back on track- Lets remember that Theresa is the older sister and should know better than to turn her parents against her younger brother. It makes me sick that you are all on Theresa's side-- we all know that theresa will probably do just about anything to make herself look good and make herself look like the poor victim. Melissa & Kathy are certainly not the villians here!! Looking forward to seeing how this all plays out!! P.S. Carolyn, for God sake, you don't control the families like the Godfather-- stop being so dramatic!!!!!

notfair
notfair

I cannot believe u r bashed by many ppl here!!! You did nothing wrong at the last episode to me. You didn't approach Teresa in attacking mode. Teresa was the one immediately flipped, changed the tone of voice and ending up screamed at you for NOTHING or for TRUETH. It was not the place or time for you to talk to Teresa???????????????? Oh, right, when you deal with Teresa, there is no such an appropriate place to have a conversaiton with her. Teresa should drop the self-respect a little, while lean how to respect others.

PS. your husband is funny.

CAT lover 99
CAT lover 99

I hardly ever post comments but I must say after the comments i have read on here I thought I should. It amazes me that every other comment called on you for taking sides, yet noone has said how Joe's father and mother took Teresea's husbands side. Not Teresea but her husband.Listen I don't see anything wrong with talking to Teresea at the brownstone, but you would have to know she would explode. It was in public, there was a camera and you were right. She doesnt do well..Since it looks like Melissa and Joe can not get support from the rest of their family I think it is great you are stepping up. Keep it up

Olivv
Olivv

I like Kathy, but i do recognize that she is flawed in the way that she tries to deal with her family's issue. So are Melissa and Teresa. It's not a one sided thing... none of them are innocent.

I do think it's really interesting how everyone is ignoring the fact that Teresa DID leave her kids unattended, and Kathy did help her out. Kathy even said that she didn't bring it up as a way to say that she's a bad other, but oh no, poor Teresa, she's the victim... come on guys, get real.

And another thing that annoys me is how everyone thinks Teresa is an angel and she does nothing wrong and never tries to stir the pot... She did it at the country club last season when she was saying to danielle because she's a "sweet person."

cakedoll
cakedoll

You all hate Teresa so bad that you had to go on T.V. just to bad mouth her all the time, couldn't you just tell her when you were around her instead of humiliating her in front of her friends and family and the world. how sad for Teresa. What goes around comes around. I hope Bravo post my response,all other sites due.

DGarcia
DGarcia

Kathy... I think "ara jackson" said it perfectly.. you're sense of needing to help just Teresa should include Melissa and her sister's! all they did at their own sister's child's christening was add fuel to the fire.. I hope Melissa & Joe and Teresa & Joe can come together as a family without all the well intentions of outsiders.. just saying...

yogabear
yogabear

Not the time or place for confrontations! Keep out of other peoples business... not good for you to be on the "bad" side (Melissa and Joe).

Karole
Karole

Kathy, I am absolutely baffled by your behavior. Your intentions are very clear-- you want to make Teresa look as bad as possible. I have a sneaking suspicion that you and Melissa are very jealous of Teresa and the success this show has brought her. It's so sad because Teresa is your cousin, your blood, and your passive aggressive behavior toward her is sickening to watch. Own up to your actions, please.

NCMCC
NCMCC

I don't think the way you handled Teresa was right. You had already picked your side (Joey and Melissa) before you approached her, it showed in your tone and Teresa reacted like any good mother would. You did not come at her in a way that was neutral and non-judgemental. Teresa had her guard up and you should have invited her to your home to talk because you did that with Joey and Melissa, that's the only fair way to be neutral.

It seems like your husband does not like Teresa at all. I noticed his comments in both the first and second episodes and he is totally Anti-Teresa. Maybe he is the reason you have sided with Joey and Melissa, he has turned you against Teresa. I think your husband is alright, when he isn't discussing anything about Teresa. If you are all about family, why would you allow your husband to speak ill of your cousin? Just sayin'

Caligirl Housewife
Caligirl Housewife

Do you know that saying blood is thicker than water. Well you should try it out.

Are you related to Kim G?

 Concern Viewer
Concern Viewer

I must agree with everyone else you were stirring the pot so own it. Go a head and say I am messy but, just no that your not along Melissa, her sisters, and Kimm G is too. Hope this will be your first and last seasons.

Susam
Susam

Kathy, Well you may have had good intentions but that didn't work. One thing I will say is that your instincts about the Kims and picking your friends more carefully are right on. Watch it with those two. THAT will get you in trouble!

DeeWill
DeeWill

I am really not feeling you or Melissa and that's big considering I'm not a huge Teresa fan. You are old enough to know that the fashion show was not the place to bring up the family drama. Also, we can all see that you are by no means neutral. Even your blogs from the last two weeks show that you are anti-Teresa. So how about you just own it.

I do actually feel bad for Teresa that her family is so jealous that they would decide to get on tv to air out the family's dirty laundry. I mean how mature is that?

ruby a
ruby a

Ii love Teresa I believe Melissa is the one putting all the trouble in that family....and you have no right to take any sides you need to remain neutral...blood is thicker than water!

RACHAEL B
RACHAEL B

I come from an Italian Family as well and actually it appears that your taking Melissa and Joe's side right off the bat. Your not being neutral at all and approaching someone like you did with Teresa tells us that she is a stranger not someone whom your protecting and trying to help.

PS Dont stir the pot

Teresa Jackson
Teresa Jackson

Kathy your It was fine that you tried to ask Teresa what happend at the

fashion show. Why would you think she would blow up in your face like

she did. If she did not have any ill feelings towards you for some reason

like she did for Melissa, that you did not know about then I know you

meant well and were neutral. It is obvious Teresa has anger issues and

just does not trust you, and has been pretending to be nicey with you for

the sake of looking like the good one in the family but she is just a bully.

I got got your back girl.

#dismayedSIL
#dismayedSIL

It is sad that you seem to have good intentions but chose two very different ways of approaching the same problem. Obviously both Teresa and her brother Joe have issues, but you seem to coddle Melissa and Joe and brow beat Teresa. Maybe if you had approached her with the same loving kindness you showed Joe and Melissa the results would have been more favorable.

Mary D
Mary D

You were so wrong to bring up a family matter at a public place. If you were sincere in trying to resolve this family matter, why didn't you invite Teresa and Joe for dinner at your house with Melissa and Joe? I sure if they met up, it would be the first step to resolve the issues!

Dolores T
Dolores T

If you wanted to help you should have asked Theresa over for coffee. Not in a public place that she is already in defense mode because of the christening. Melisa a pears to love drama and cause it when she can. But Out your not helping!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TeamRamona
TeamRamona

I hope Caroline Manzo gives you a tongue lashing of a lifetime. Dont piss on her or her family ( the viewers) Damn I love Caroline.

jenishot
jenishot

you shouldn't choose sides..and you have.

Viewer142
Viewer142

Typical, you wanted camera time and boy, did you get it. I love that Caroline BASICALLY threw you and Melissa out. Go Caroline.

AMANDA JOY
AMANDA JOY

KATHY, YOU ARE SO SWEET AND NICE AND I HOPE YOU AND TERESA COULD GET CLOSER THAN YOU EVER WERE AS A RESULT OF THIS.

YOUR HUSBAND IS NICE AND HILARIOUS AND YOU ARE A VERY LUCKY LADY! HAVEN'T SEEN MUCH OF YOUR KIDS YET BUT I'M SURE THEY'RE GREAT.

SMD_LA
SMD_LA

Stop saying that you want to make peace between Melissa and Teresa. It's obvious whose side you are on!

hammondb3
hammondb3

Why are you on the show??? So far all you've done, along with Melissa's sisters, is stir up junk. Please sit down somewhere! Thanx!

viewer!123
viewer!123

I like you. I think, you have a lot of common sense and I think you're getting a bad rap for trying to acknowledge the problem with Teresa and her brother Joey. Maybe...looking back you would have handled it differenlty. (Who hasn't been quilty of that?!) Hang in there...I think, Teresa's true colors will be coming out soon. Just wait...anytime there is a fight (or table flipping) she is in the dead center. Hang in there!!

missyintexas
missyintexas

I'm sorry. You need to stay out of it. This is between Melissa and Teresa and Joe and Joey. You're intentions were NOT sincere. If not, you would not have expected anything from Teresa. She was genuine when she wanted to see her family and offer her congratulations. It was obvious Melissa and her family were fueling the fire and it caught when Teresa walked up. I'm sorry, but the less people involved the better. It's very immature and petty to involve anyone else in this fued or to include yourself. Time heals all wounds and STAY OUT!

JoeinVegas
JoeinVegas

I really like you. But you were confrontational with Teresa. Own it!

Jana M.
Jana M.

If there are so many issues between Teresa and her brother, Joe, then why did all of you decide to do the show? Let that be Teresa's thing. It only makes sense that it was more important for Melissa and you to become reality stars than to work on the family relationships. I think that it is wrong to continue with the digs on Teresa. She has shown that she is focusing on being a better person. Sometimes you need to give her the benefit of the doubt and not just say things like "Teresa then lost all rational thinking and started screaming and carrying on." To be honest, if you were really trying to help mend things, you wouldn't say comments like that.

Rayanna
Rayanna

You say your attentions were good, but I don't believe it. This wasn't the time to say anything to her about the christening. If you had a good attentions like you said. You should have called her and invited her over for coffee or dinner. Teresa had the right idea. She wasn't going to address what happened at the fashion show. She didn't even have to say hi to either of you, but she did. I think that you wanted to make yourself look good and make Teresa look bad. You know her well and know how to push her buttons. If you want to help be neutral like someone said. I know it's hard, but I think you will do a lot better if you did stay neutral and try to Teresa and her brother work things out instead of taking sides.

viewerAlicia
viewerAlicia

I agree with everyone else, you should not have attempted to discuss the christening at the fashion show. The only reason you did it there was to make Teresa look bad when she got upset with you so you could publicly say "see I told you she would explode." Which is exactly what you and that two faced Melissa did on the way out of the Brownstone. Shame on you!!! You are older and should know better!! Teresa is your blood family, Melissa is only married in, you should have better family loyalties!

RHNJ FAN
RHNJ FAN

It sure seemed like you were trying to initiate conflict and drama. Just wanted you time in the spot light we see. You attacked Teresa and then accused her of being a bad mother and sister. I say you are at fault for that one.

RHNJ FAN
RHNJ FAN

It sure seemed like you were trying to initiate conflict and drama. Just wanted you time in the spot light we see. You attacked Teresa and then accused her of being a bad mother and sister. I say you are at fault for that one.

lou lou
lou lou

Even in your blog you are still insulting Teresa. My goodness she is only human, she has been through hell and back, wheter she brought it on herself or not, she's only human. You as a family member should stop the Teresa bashing and maybe show some support, she needs that more that anything right now. None of us is perfect, NOT EVEN YOU!!

FTWTX
FTWTX

I actually think you're basically a nice person BUT it's clear you've chosen sides with Melissa (and I'm not sure why because she seems jealous and hateful). Be a nice cousin to both ladies and you might actually be able to help the situation. I think you and your husband are a very cute couple.

NeB
NeB

You really chose an inappropriate time and place to "discuss" family issues with your cousin. Just as you invited Melissa and Joey into your home, you should have done the same for Teresa and her husband. I don't know why you and Melissa seem to think negative attention is better than no attention at all, but it's not. Don't give us anymore reasons not to like you. I will keep watching and hope that someone comes out as the mature person in the end to bring this family back together, and it might just be your husband over you! Good luck

Paula K
Paula K

I'm so confused as to why it's Teresa who has to apologize. I'm no fan of hers but it was her brother that ruined the christening.

Avesmommy
Avesmommy

Kathie, loved reading your blog and I couldn't agree more about getting the children away from such a mess. I hate that so many saw such an ugly event. As far as your conversation with Teresa, I think your intentions were good, just maybe a little misplaced. I know you took her to an empty room and it was after the show, but I don't think that was the best time to bring up such a sensitive topic. Regardless, I hope they work it out... family is forever. You are a great addition to the show and I look forward to the rest of the season!

Jeffster
Jeffster

After reading your blog, I truly believe your intentions were good. Things didn't go as planned. You should know that bad things can happen sometimes with good intentions. I see past it though, and know that your plan was to pacify and not stir the pot. Don't give up on your family - even though I gave up on mine :)

Viewer Nicole Westley-Gordon
Viewer Nicole Westley-Gordon

It really hurts me to my heart to see family treat each other this way, especially on television where you have millions of viewers. I do have to say watching the second episode Kathy was merely trying to bring her first cousins to speak to one another. Teresa took what Kathy was saying in the wrong way, reason being is because Theresa is not fully ready to speak on the issue at hand. I do not believe for one minute that Kathy was questioning Teresa's parenting. Kathy was the one who was there calming her little cousin. Teresa you are human just like everyone else and you can't be in more then one place at a time. I don't care how good of a parent you think that you are, it just is not always possible. Teresa, someone has to be the BIGGER person when it comes to you and your brother. No matter how much you think it's your sister in laws fault or he thinks it's your husbands fault you are FAMILY at the end of the day. Do you all want your kids growing up acting just the same way as you all? I hope to believe that your answer would be NO!!!!!!!! At the end of the day TWO WRONGS DON'T MAKE IT RIGHT. I know for a fact if something was to happen to your brother you would be crushed. So with this being said, "BE THE BIG SISTER YOU ARE".Be an example to your husband, your girls', and your niece and nephew. If you DON'T who WILL?

Sandy in new York
Sandy in new York

Still on team teresa also. have with Kim G she will you any thing you want. Just ask danielle