At dinner, my husband pulls out Teresa's letter and asks her, "What do you mean by you hurt me, you hurt my family?" Teresa has no answer. Joe tells Teresa that their relationship is broken because he feels that she neglected his family, that she is not an aunt to his kids, and that he is tired of her being fake for the cameras. In the first episode, Joe tells Teresa to "do what you do best" and ignore us. He's referring to the fact that Teresa doesn't call to see how our kids are or come over to see our family. He also mentions in this episode how she doesn't know her godson, Gino, and my heart broke.
Teresa constantly says, "It's your wife," that I'm "cold," and that I ignored her phone calls. Anyone who knows me knows that I am not cold. I am one of the most loyal people around. I love life, and I wear my heart on my sleeve. I never wanted to ignore her phone calls, but sometimes I would be having a nice day with my kids and she would call, make an unnecessary dig, and ruin it. As you can see from watching the show for the past three seasons, Teresa has a way of saying things to people that can make your mouth drop almost every time. She'll say something nasty then, when you react, she will call you out on it and never acknowledge what she said to cause the reaction in the first place. These are the hurtful comments that Kathy talks about during the episode, which Teresa thinks we are all too sensitive about and should just ignore. It's like that girl in school who will pinch you and then when the teacher comes over to see what the problem is she just smiles and says, "I don't know why she's so mad."
When Joe asks Teresa, "What has my wife done to you," she comes back to the fact that I sent her a card that said, "Congratulations to you and your re-done home." I'm not sure if you caught it, but what Joe tries to explain to Teresa is that I wrote that card, because when we finished our new house, she called not to congratulate us, but to say that we only finished your home in a year because we had a loan. It seemed like Teresa was upset that we finished our home first, like it's a competition. What's the big deal? Why can't we celebrate that we're both movin' on up? I'm not proud that I said re-done home on her card. I should have just zipped it and let it go. Understand this is just one of the many backhanded comments we've received from Teresa over the years, and you can only get pushed so much.
After watching these past few episodes, I'm starting to see that when Teresa talks about her family, she means her mother, father, her brother, and her kids -- not her brother's wife or his kids. If any of you are aunts or uncles maybe you can understand where I'm coming from. Think about the love you have for them. Could you ever treat them wrong or ignore them? I love my nieces and nephews; they can do no wrong in my eyes. I really wish I could get the kids together for more play dates. I know I just have to suck it up and deal with Teresa to make sure the kids don't grow up without really knowing each other, but we also really need to talk about the underlying issues before we can move forward as a family. The problem is that Teresa pretends like everything is fine when it's not. She has a tendency to throw a blanket over everything instead of sitting down and getting to the root of the problem so everyone can move on.