Cast Blog: #RHONJ

Pot Shots

Amber Calls Out Andy Cohen

Dina: What am I Doing Here?

Amber: Is Dina Coldhearted?

Dina: "The Reunion was Very Hard to Watch"

Teresa: We Love Hard, We Fight Hard

Dina: The Ladybug Event was Perfection

Amber: I Felt I Like I Was Being Hazed

Melissa: Continue to Pray for Teresa's Family

Why Amber Shares Her Cancer Story

Dina: I Was Team Santa

Teresa: I Don't Blame Jim

Bobby's Unacceptable Behavior

Amber: Dina is Jealous

Melissa: "We are Heartbroken"

Dina Reacts to the Sentencing

Kathy Talks Kevin Jonas

Amber: Dina Was Planning a Blood Bath

Jim and Amber Were on Different Pages

Dina on Bobby's "Bizarre" Behavior

Amber Calls BS on Dina

Nicole: Words are So Powerful

Teresa: "Kudos to Dina!"

Teresa: I Love the Show, I Love My Fans

Praying for a Positive Outcome for Teresa

"Tipsy Melissa is My Spirit Animal"

Dina's Lose-Lose Situation

Jacqueline on Her Status with Teresa

Why Teresa Told Dina the Rumor

Amber on Her Cancer Scare

Teresa: There was an Agenda to Hurt My Family

Melissa: I Do Feel for Amber

Dina: Gia's Beautiful Inside and Out

Nicole: This is Not 'Jerry Springer'

Amber on Her Meltdown with Teresa

Amber's Emotional Call to Teresa

Teresa Thanks the Fans

Dina: Florida Will Be the New Scary Island

Teresa: I Wish I Never Heard the Rumor

Amber on the Shocking Rino Rumor

Victoria Gotti's Big No No

Pot Shots

Episode 19: Jay Mohr thinks Teresa just cookbooked herself out of the circle.

The episode opens at Melissa's house, where she is putting together outfits with her stylist. The stylist must be very good at her job, because she has convinced Melissa to walk around her house in leather pants with corsets in the back. Melissa is also wearing Barbara Eden's top from her I Dream of Jeannie days. I don't think it fits her, because during the scene she plays with her boobs constantly. Let's get back to Melissa's leather corset pants. She's like New Jersey's Scarlett O'Hara. I like to imagine Hattie McDaniel pulling her into them and Melissa yelling, "Tighter! Tighter! Ashley Wilkes is coming over!" Melissa also says that she's scared that her boob might pop out. Um, Melissa, there's a new product on the market and it's called a bra.

The phone rings and it's Teresa. Melissa and Teresa both have bedazzled phones, and as it turns out, they also have the same stylist. This becomes a bit of controversy, because the stylist tells Melissa that Teresa has forbidden her from working with Melissa. It seems that working with Melissa and Teresa at the same time would be the world's easiest stylist job. They essentially dress the same. No matter what the occasion or how much prep time they are given, they both always leave the house dressed like a gypsy. A fun Clubhouse game would be to match the face to the outfits.

Editor's Note: Speaking of Clubhouse fun, enjoy Melissa's new music video:
Over at Jacqueline's house, Chris' brother Jaime comes over from out of town for a visit. Jaime looks like Chris if Chris got put in a blender with Jessie James. Jaime decides on this visit that he is going to have a talk with Ashley. Ashley surprises Chris and her mother by unveiling a new tattoo. I know I am supposed to be angry at the way Ashley is behaving, but I really don't care at all. Somehow Ashley has jumped her own shark. While watching the show, I didn't care about Ashley's tattoo. I didn't care about Ashley's potential move to Los Angeles (I thought she already left). Sadly, I didn't even care about Chris and Jacqueline as long as Ashley was on the screen. Ashley has become a giant black hole of, "Who Cares?" The Real Housewives of New Jersey is one of my favorite television shows, but when Ashley is on the screen, it all just becomes white noise. In a medium that is based on controversy and excitement, Ashley has committed the cardinal sin. Whenever she is on screen, I feel complete indifference.

After the photo shoot, the Gorga/Giudice tribes sit down for an amazing looking meal. Joe Giudice gives a toast where he makes a joke that his mother-in-law has had a lot of plastic surgery. Mother-in-law jokes? What is this a 1979 episode of The Tonight Show? Joey Gorga also gave a toast. I don't want to say that Joey Gorga's toast was too long, but at one point they cut to little Joey combing his hair with bread…and that was his third slice!

In the final act of our beloved show, the recipes hit the fan. Teresa's cookbook comes out, and it causes a ton of trouble. You would have thought Kitty Kelly put out a book about the Scientologists. How bad could it be? What could Teresa have written that is so bad? It's a cookbook. Is she naming ingredientzes and putting poison in the cumin? As I kept watching, I got quite a surprise. Leave it to Teresa to somehow insult people in a freaking cookbook. Last time I checked, cookbooks are filled with recipes, right? Usually when you write a cookbook, there isn't a lot of room left over to take pot shots at friends and loved ones. I don't recall Sandra Lee ever printing the recipe for pumpkin scones and then putting an extra part about how Andrew Cuomo farts when he pees. But Teresa thought ahead. She knew that there wouldn't be room for insults in between all of those Fabulicious recipes. That's why she put the insults in the introduction. Yeah!

It's so bad that Melissa won't even show it to Joey. If Melissa and her sisters don't want your kind of trouble, you must be cookin' up a whole new level of trouble. Melissa says in her interview that she doesn't want to be in the middle of the triangle between Teresa and her brother. Melissa, that's not a triangle. When it's just two people it's a straight line. Then Melissa says she has "seed" her way out of it. I swear to you, I rewound the show like fifty times. The woman that brought us "wench like me" has now shown us how to "seed" out of situations.

In the cookbook, Teresa says some pretty petty (and pretty stupid) things about Melissa and Caroline and even sweet little Christopher! Teresa says that Caroline is 1/16th Italian. When Jacqueline asks her if she thinks Big Chris is 1/16th Italian, Teresa says she wasn't talking about Jacqueline's husband, she was talking about Caroline. Jacqueline briefly tries to explain that Caroline and Chris are brother and sister, which would make both of them the same fraction of Italian, but Teresa interrupts her and asks if anyone can take a joke. Caroline says in her interview, "There's no legitimate reason why she would take a shot at my son…not my kids." Momma Manzo says this very calmly and coldly into the camera. I then realized that Teresa had just cookbooked herself out of the circle.

On a side note, what recipe would require her to mention Christopher? Was she making stripper carwash flambé? This is very disturbing behavior from Teresa. Go back and read my blogs from a couple of months ago. I wrote that I thought Teresa was coming undone. It turns out I was right. Not only has Teresa come undone, but it looks like entering Season 4 she has become unwanted. By taking shots at people in her cookbook, she has alienated herself from Caroline, Albert, Albie, Christopher, Lauren, (Greg?), Jacqueline, Chris, Melissa, and eventually her brother. That's ten people that just turned against you on a show with a cast of twelve. That's tough sledding.
How amazing is it that with four minutes left to go in the season, Teresa swoops in and snatches the title of villain? I was totally surprised. In her final interview, Teresa says, "Everyone thinks how funny I am, like I'm Lucille Ball." No one, NO ONE thinks you are like Lucille Ball. The season has finally ended and you have shown the viewers that you are a wrecking ball.

With the season over I find myself blue. I feel like a man without a country. Now what? No more bickering. No more Gorga chapeaux. No more family dinners. No more Greg. No more SOULDIGGAZ. No more piggies in a blanket. And the most sad thing of all, no more Joe Giudice slowly, and ever so surely, doing the splits.

Thank you to Bravo for letting me be a part of this. Thank you to the readers for reading these silly blogs. Thank you to the cast for being good sports. Don't forget to watch what happens. Goodbye.

Jay Mohr, Real Househusband of Santa Monica Adjacent

Dina: "The Reunion was Very Hard to Watch"

Dina Manzo opens up about her comments regarding her family and why she kept quiet for Teresa Giudice.

This reunion was very hard to watch. What most of you don't know is I went in there with the intention of keeping silent on my family issues, as I have for the past four years. An incident happened at the reunion, and I won't even give that person the attention they crave, but it set me off to tell my truth. Well some of it at least. I felt I was very P.C. this whole time, but now I had enough. Some people will push you because they know deep down inside you won't push back, but being "zen" is all about setting boundaries, and learning that has been part of my spiritual path. 

I don't want to go into much other than saying my answer about Nic came out very cold because there was more to it. I wish it were that easy to get to know him, but unfortunately it's not because of my relationship with his mother, and I'm just being honest. He is not missing me nor does he know what is going on with this family because of NOTHING more than his age. Anyone who is trying to make people think otherwise, especially his mother, should be ashamed of themselves. The Mother Theresa comment was about people comparing how I raise money for children with cancer yet don't help him. I went on to say how blessed my brother is to live in a county in New Jersey that people actually move to for the autism programs offered. How I see joy in him because of the progress he is making. He is a happy, beautiful child that is on his way to recovery, and although I know it's a struggle for parents of children on the spectrum, there is NOTHING wrong with seeing joy in them instead of sorrow. I appreciate all the parents of children with autism for their emails, tweets, etc. understanding and APPRECIATING that I see Nic as a 4 year old beautiful boy and not labeling him as anything other than that.

Kathy and Melissa should not have challenged me about "family values" if they don't want to hear my side. I kept quiet for the most part for TERESA, not wanting to bring up old wounds when she was dealing with so much around her sentencing. It was a hard position for me to be in. 

I have no words for my sister on WWHL. She could have answered the no engagement question and left it at that. The lies that followed after were extremely hurtful and must have come from the sheer frustration of having to defend her position on the engagement party. All of you have seen I have ONLY ever said positive things about her no matter what I was feeling. 

Please take a moment to watch this video I made on my truth about it all. I will post all the details on my look next week, but you can get to everyone involved -- from hair to dress  -- on my Instagram post on Sunday. Speaking of Instagram, I invite you to join me on a post a day for the month of November to share what you are thankful for. Showing gratitude for what you have in life just allows the universe to send you more to be thankful for! Trust me, it works!

Sending lots of love, 

Dina xo