I WILL tell you that the one emotion I was NOT feeling was fear. I don't get intimidated expressing my feelings to anyone. I'm never afraid to face anyone. If you look back on past episodes, you will notice that I am the one always confronting the person to their face on whatever dilemma was going on. I have kept it real and stayed true to myself. I don't fear confrontation, and there is nothing about my life that I won't talk openly about. I'm human like everyone else, and I'm OK not being perfect. I do hesitate when it comes to discussing someone else's life, but it honestly depends on the circumstance or how pissed off I am at the person. I consider myself a very open and honest person with integrity. So for those of you who thought I was too scared or intimidated to show up to the reunion, you were absolutely 100% wrong. The truth is, I had a breakdown. Why? That story will eventually be told.
Please keep in mind that I go through ALL the same emotions that you all do. Mine are just caught on camera and replayed for all to see. I actually feel like it's a blessing in disguise. I've learned a lot from watching myself and others on the show. I feel that by watching and each other, we learn some valuable lessons. It has also brought my daughter, Ashlee, and I closer together. We are in a good place now.