Sadly, it's turned into something else. None of us went on the first seasons of Housewives thinking we could turn it into anything. We were just happy to share our lives and our struggles (remember when Bethenny wasn't a billionaire and couldn't pay her bills?). Now people beg to get on so they can cash in. And they do it without caring who they hurt, even family. They do things on purpose just to stir up drama. I am very thankful for the great things that came out of being a Housewife, but of course, I'd trade it all because sometimes the negatives -- like friendships falling apart and families broken up -- aren't worth it. But it is what it is, and I have to make the best of it and try and take the high road. And I will keep trying!
I don't like watching myself from a year ago on Housewives, because I did let some of the drama get to me. It's hard not to when it seems like everyone around you is doing their best to pick on you, bait you, and try and make you look bad. That's not what I'm about. You know me -- I react but I don't set out to act out. I don't plot or try and pretend I'm something I'm not. My family and friends know it too, and they seem to be having a great time trying to get me to "react." Of course, I'm not perfect, and sometimes they do find just the right thing to get me upset, but I am proud of the fact that I walk away, and I don't do the same back to them.
To answer all of your questions, I don't think I'm being ganged up on or bullied. I just think the other cast members know that blowing little things in my life out of proportion and constantly talking about me all day takes the focus off things they don't like in their own lives. That's fine. I can take it!
You all know my life is a pretty open book -- way more open than I ever thought it would be -- but it's open. I've said since Season 1: "There are no skeletons in my freakin' closet. Thank you, thank you very much." That doesn't mean I'm perfect. That doesn't mean my life is all wine and roses. But especially after being on the show, every single bad thing that could be written about me and my husband (true or false) has been written. It hasn't been fun, but we've survived it.