Cast Blog: #RHONJ

The Queen's English

Episode 7: Bravotv.com's Associate Editor thinks the 'Jersey' crew should always speak in a British accent.

Just when you thought Jersey couldn't get any gayer, a wedding full of fascinators and butterflies happens along with a whipped cream fight on the Jersey Shore. And yet again, it was full of tears and moving moments. Oh and a lot of talk about Kate Hudson Middleton.

No. 3 - The Queen's English

Like a gift from above, Chris Manzo decided en route to the wedding that everyone should try their hand at a British accent to really get into the spirit of the English-themed nuptials. I ask you, what could be more thrilling than seeing the Jersey crew take on the queen's English? Nothing, that's what. It was as if we had suddenly been transported to Downton Abbey by way of a party bus in Chicago.

The Manzo kids probably had it down best, but of course used it only to insult each other. That's OK though, because it sounded so very proper. It's not mean when it sounds regal! The real treat however was Teresa's attempt at a British accent. Even she knew that wasn't going to end well, but props for being a good sport. All we got was, "It is...so divine," and yes, it was divine. There was really no discernible trace of an English accent. None at all. But I think if you listen very closely, you can sense the spirit of the United Kingdom in that utterance.

Side note: Kate Hudson was in no way involved in the royal wedding. And no, Kate Middleton would not think the feather was too much.

No. 2 - Gays Do It Better

I really can't argue with Caroline (because it's true and I also wouldn't want to be on her bad side), "Leave it to the gays, they do everything right." How is it possible to throw together a wedding with horse-drawn carriages, swans, and boxes of butterflies all at a fairytale venue? With a little fabulous elbow grease evidently. Aren't weddings supposed to take upwards of a year to plan? Yet somehow everything came together and it was a gorgeous (although very hot as we learned from Jamie's sweat-soaked shirt) day.

Chris' interview about his brother was also as beautiful as the wedding itself. You could tell he loves his brother and was genuinely happy for him. And how great were those vintage shots of Chris and Jamie? Something tells me those two were the cause of a lot of broken hearts in Jersey.

Side note: I don't understand why everyone seemed so hung up on whether the horses would stop and poop as they carried in the happy couple. Was there a bet? Obviously they weren't going to, this is a proper gay, English-themed wedding!
No. 1 - It Gets Better

Another week, another gay moment that brings me to tears. Seriously, RHONJ has become the new face of the "It Gets Better" campaign. First we have Jamie and Rich's vows. I definitely don't envy Rich having to go second. It's got to be pretty tough to deliver your own speech after your partner pontificates on how much he loves you. But then Jamie makes it worse by bursting into tears when Rich starts his vows. At that point, obviously, Rich loses it too and it becomes a full on cry fest. Touching, but keep it together! We want to hear the vows! (This is why I always keep my speeches humorous.)

Then helping to continue the unending river of tears, Caroline takes the stage to deliver her speech. After we get past the mountain of minds analogy (odd visual, I have to admit), Caroline really brings down the house when she talks about Jamie's coming out and how he was scared to disappoint his parents. But both his mom and dad were both just happy he was finally "free" to be himself. Of course now there is not a dry eye in the house.

But hey if you're need to come down from this roller coaster of emotions, just remember that Caroline is wearing a lily pad on her head.
Next week things get tense between Teresa and Jacqueline over the Melissa drama. 

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Amber: Is Dina Coldhearted?

Amber Marchese dishes on her first reunion and why Dina Manzo confuses her.

Hello Housewife friends!  Welcome to the jungle baby! My first reunion was a wild ride. Call me sick and twisted, but I had an unbelievable time at the reunion when most, I have been warned, dread it. I felt like it was “The Great Purge” and when I went home I was felt relieved of any built up tension. I don’t care if anyone has a grudge against me, my slate is clean and I harbor no ill feelings towards anyone. I love to argue my point, and I truly stood by all of my convictions this season, so I was ready to say exactly what was on my mind, and then some. 

I know the twins and I went at one another pretty hard, but that is what the reunion is all about. It is an opportunity to get it all out and potentially understand one another's position better. Then we can each make our own decisions as to where we want to go with our relationships. I am very much the type of person that can say some of the meanest things and sling mud, but hug it out at the end forgetting anything negative that was said. It just rolls off my back. I actually think it is healthier to say what needs to be said, and then move on.

One thing I did question after the reunion was if Dina actually has a heart or if I should start calling her the Tin Man. I actually have not figured her out yet. Is she really just a coldhearted bitch, or has she been hurt so many times that she has become warped and jaded. I feel I don’t owe anyone any reason as to why I call cancer “the cancer,” but I will give it once more anyhow. “The cancer” is “the monster” to me. It is a way for me to take away its power and to minimize it. “It” destroys lives, so “it” does not deserve a name. It is just “the cancer” -- it was “the monster” or “the dragon.” Although Dina claims to have an understanding of how devastating cancer is to a family, her actions and blatant lack of empathy proves otherwise.

In addition, I did not think it was appropriate for me to interject into family quarrels at the reunion; however, this is something that I feel strongly about. I have met Jaqueline and I have spoken to her on many occasions. In the very short time that I have gotten to know Jaqueline, I know and have empathy with the struggles she has caring for Nicholas. I felt that Dina’s interpretation of her nephew was callous and completely out of touch with reality. The only thing that keeps playing in my mind is, "You know nothing John Snow."  No, thank God, he is not hooked up to machines with cancer; however, what the Laurita family goes through is extremely difficult on a day to day basis that will continue on for a lifetime. It is emotionally and financially devastating. Although, Dina "visits" children with cancer, at the end of her visit she gets to go home, leaving it behind and goes on with her daily life. Since Dina does work with children with cancer, I pray that she can abstain from a self-absorbed lifestyle and become a loving, involved aunt. 

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