No. 3 - Fight and Flight
All the fighting was crazy, but the part that was the most scary came when Joe announced he and Teresa were leaving early. It seemed like all the shouting and arguing had taken a toll on Teresa, because her shouts of excitement were so high pitched that I was a little nervous that glass in her hand was going to shatter Mariah Carey bird-song style.
Speaking of that glass, when she mentioned she was so excited that she could throw her glass, I think everyone was a little on edge there for a moment. Luckily no glassware, tables, or any other household item were harmed in the filming of this episode.
Luckily Teresa and Joe got out of having to travel with everyone, but could you imagine if they had to stay? What if they had to get back in the RVs again to head back? I can't even begin to imagine how that would have worked. That may have been the point that would finally crack them all -- just a lot of nudity, shouting, and more nudity.
I think Kathy hit upon a genius idea for a new reality show: Patterson Girls. The tagline could be something along the lines of, "Don't put your hands on a Patterson girl (or her hair)." Clearly the town that produced Kathy, Teresa, and Joe Gorga is a gold mine.
Anyway, Teresa got touchy feely with Kathy in a not so friendly way, and the porcelain rainbow princess was not amused. It made me wonder if Kathy was the queen bee of her middle school back in the day. Maybe she went through a rough patch and then found her softer side through baking? (How great would that be as a YA fiction story? Twilight: Breaking Cannoli, The Kathy Diaries, etc.) It seemed a little tense there for a second, as if things might blow up even more between these two (you could tell from Melissa's face that she was bracing for impact), but luckily it fizzled.
Side note: I also loved the cut to Rich's "F---?" expression in the background. Everyone's face from this scene was truly amazing.
I have to thank the Jersey men for really bringing to life the meaning of Zou Bisou Bisou. Seriously, someone really needs to set Megan's serenade to Don from last season of Mad Men to this scene, it's a guaranteed to be an internet sensation. But I digress.
This scene of Chris and Joe making up was my favorite from the episode for many reasons. It was of course some serious comic relief in an episode that was one long, excruciatingly drawn out fight. (Really someone could have told a knock knock joke and it would have been hilarious juxtaposed with all the chaos.)
But also what was this? It seemed things were going to get crazy between Chris and Joe for a minute there, and then they turned it around and started kissing. What? Did we miss something? I actually don't think so. The Jersey guys seem to have an uncanny ability to get really mad about something and then a minute later get over it. It's almost as if once they verbalize their anger, they realize that it's not actually a big deal.
And then of course Joe Gorga and Rich are so moved that they decide they should start kissing too. Make outs all around! If only the ladies could resolve their issues so easily...