What a beautiful sunny week! Joe and I were in Miami for my Fabulicious: On the Grill book signings, and then we spent the weekend at the shore with our kids playing on the beach. Our shore house is almost rebuilt -- Joe did an amazing job! -- but we still don't have a TV there. This week, I was kinda glad though, since it was not an episode I wanted my kids to watch. It's not an episode I wanted to be in!
I do really, really wish that Kathy would leave my dad out of the show. I signed up to be on a reality show, my dad didn't. He's only appeared a few times for his children, but not for himself. He wants no part of this show, he doesn't even watch it (Thank God!), and I think you can see why. When my father is filmed with us, he doesn't talk about Kathy's family, and I would love it if they would stop talking about him. If I had known 5 years ago when I signed up for a show about shopping with my friends that people were going to talk about my father's private business, I would never, ever have joined. If you want to talk about your own father on TV, be my guest. But please, stop talking about mine.
When I finally did see my brother for the first time, I went up to him right away and tried to be friendly and goof around with him like we did our whole lives. Caroline had just told me how much he wanted to work things out with me, so badly he supposedly sent Caroline to help him, so I thought it would be may be a little awkward but still nice. Baby steps. I definitely did not expect his attack. I didn't understand any of it then, and I still don't now. He's my brother, and as mad as I might be at him, I would never hurt him in public like that. I don't understand how he could even say half the things that came out of his mouth, directly to my face, in public in front of America. I get it that in the heat of the moment people who have deep feelings for each other know how to hurt each other the most, but still, there are lines you don't cross. When Joey started talking about my husband's parenting, that was it for me. He crossed the line and was out of line.
One of my best friends' dads is a psychiatrist, and she told me that everything Joey did was a defense mechanism to protect himself from his own feelings. He denies anything is wrong in his own life, displaces his anger at himself or his wife to me since he knows I won't fight back, and projects things he is actually guilty of onto other people, like my husband. It does make sense to me, but it doesn't hurt any less. I'm about to run out of prayers for him and me. I could use extra if you've got 'em.
I'm not going to attack back, I'm not going to go on and on defending myself, but I will say, I don't really hide anything, especially something as silly as Botox! Um, Jacqueline, do you not remember going with me to Danielle's Botox party in Season 1? I don't know why we're even talking about it now though... We haven't talked in months and months, and this is what Jacqueline is worried about?No matter what though, I am incredibly blessed that at the end of the day, I get to go home to my 4 beautiful daughters and my loving husband. That I wouldn't trade for anything in the world.
Thank you all for sticking by me and defending me like the sisters and brothers I never had. I adore my second family, the family I got to choose!
And we just got a new shipment in from Italy of Skinny Italian Foods! It's so so good! I can't believe we ran out so quickly, but we've back in stock. Go to http://www.skinnyitalianfoods.com/ to order my balsamic ketchup (great with anything on the grill!), artisanal pasta, sauces, and olive oil!
Love love love you all!
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