Cast Blog: #RHONJ

Moving Forward with Caroline

Amber Calls Out Andy Cohen

Dina: What am I Doing Here?

Amber: Is Dina Coldhearted?

Dina: "The Reunion was Very Hard to Watch"

Teresa: We Love Hard, We Fight Hard

Dina: The Ladybug Event was Perfection

Amber: I Felt I Like I Was Being Hazed

Melissa: Continue to Pray for Teresa's Family

Why Amber Shares Her Cancer Story

Dina: I Was Team Santa

Teresa: I Don't Blame Jim

Bobby's Unacceptable Behavior

Amber: Dina is Jealous

Melissa: "We are Heartbroken"

Dina Reacts to the Sentencing

Kathy Talks Kevin Jonas

Amber: Dina Was Planning a Blood Bath

Jim and Amber Were on Different Pages

Dina on Bobby's "Bizarre" Behavior

Amber Calls BS on Dina

Nicole: Words are So Powerful

Teresa: "Kudos to Dina!"

Teresa: I Love the Show, I Love My Fans

Praying for a Positive Outcome for Teresa

"Tipsy Melissa is My Spirit Animal"

Dina's Lose-Lose Situation

Jacqueline on Her Status with Teresa

Why Teresa Told Dina the Rumor

Amber on Her Cancer Scare

Teresa: There was an Agenda to Hurt My Family

Melissa: I Do Feel for Amber

Dina: Gia's Beautiful Inside and Out

Nicole: This is Not 'Jerry Springer'

Amber on Her Meltdown with Teresa

Amber's Emotional Call to Teresa

Teresa Thanks the Fans

Dina: Florida Will Be the New Scary Island

Teresa: I Wish I Never Heard the Rumor

Amber on the Shocking Rino Rumor

Victoria Gotti's Big No No

Moving Forward with Caroline

Teresa shares her thoughts on the meeting with Caroline.

Hi Loveys!

I loved that this episode began the same way I begin every day: with my four fabulous daughters! I wake up in the morning smiling, because I know I'm going to see their faces. They just make me so happy. We have crazy days like everyone does, but that's just part of being a parent. The fact that they're healthy and happy though puts a smile on my face no matter what. I love love love being their mom!

You saw me cooking dinner for them: Escarole and Beans. The recipe is in my third cookbook "Fabulicious: Fast & Fit!" and I'll put it up my website for you all: www.teresagiudice.com. It's a great healthy vegetarian dish, filling enough for dinner!

After that, we made cards for my dad who was going into the hospital to get a pacemaker. It was such a stressful time for us. You can see I could barely talk about it without crying. I still can't talk about my parents without crying. They are everything to me. I can't start my day without talking to them.

When I was growing up, like most kids, I thought my dad was too strict and my mom didn't know anything. Now they are my best friends. My dad is my shopping buddy. I adore him. I named Gia after him (his name is Giacinto). My mom is who I turn to for advice. She's always telling me not to let things upset me, that you'll make yourself sick with worry. We do have a small family -- it was just me, my brother, and my parents. That's why it was so shocking to have my brother not want to talk to me. I didn't grow up with lots of siblings -- some you talk to, some you don't. It was just me and him, and we never fought.Of course it was very hard to see Melissa say (over and over and over) how she was moving because she didn't want her kids to grow up near my kids. But I will say their house is beautiful and very well made. Joey did a wonderful job. It's in our blood. My father did construction in Italy and when he first came to America.

When Caroline texted me to meet with her, I really had no idea what she wanted. I wasn't nervous, because we hadn't seen each other in a long time. The reunion was horrible, but I really just wanted to move forward. I really just wanted everyone to forgive and forget.

I was confused at first when Caroline said my brother had asked her to meet with me. I didn't mean he was "scraping the bottom of the barrel" as a personal insult to her, it's just that if Joey wanted someone to be a go-between for us, why would he ask someone I wasn't in a good place with? Then she said it was her idea to talk to me for Joey. That didn't make any sense to me either, since unless she had figured out some magical way of fixing her own problems with her siblings, she didn't have any more answers than I did. I didn't ask her about her family to start a fight, I just wondered (and was hoping) that's why she thought she could fix my family. Then I decided that maybe this was her way of trying to reach out to me, sort of her way to apologize for last year. I'm glad I met with her, she did look good, and the place we met was adorable.

I did want to clear up one thing from our 2-hour conversation. Caroline asked why I was still friends with Kim D. when Kim admitted to trying to set up Melissa as a stripper. I mentioned my brother apologized to Kim D. for the fight they had about it, but still wouldn't talk to me. The rest of that story is that my brother and Melissa MADE UP with Kim D. They were all fine. If they were fine, why wouldn't I be OK to hang out with her? Caroline and Jacqueline were also good with Kim D. I don't know why if everyone that was there that night was good with Kim D., I should be the only one to suddenly turn my back on her? I don't do that to people.

Kim D. never did anything to me, and she actually apologized to me for dragging me into the whole thing with Melissa. I had nothing to do with it. Melissa knows that, Caroline and Jacqueline know that, and my brother knows that. Kim D. admitted it to everyone, apologized, and they accepted her apology. And yet they were all still mad at me. For what? I apologized to each and every one of them last year as many times as I could for anything I did or said to them. They accepted my apology, we were good, and then they all used the Posche Fashion show and Kim D.'s attempt to reunite Melissa with someone from her past against me. They knew all along it was never me. Why they pretended to believe it was, I don't know. I don't know if I'll ever know.

Now for the good news: my Joe and I are going to be in Houston and San Francisco this week for book signings for "Fabulicious: On the Grill"! Yay! If you can't find it in your local bookstores, it's on Amazon: http://amzn.to/RtCq8e. And I just redid my website with a new calendar, photos and recipes! Visit me at www.teresagiudice.com and let me know what you think!

Love love love you all!

Tanti Baci,
Teresa

Follow me on Twitter @Teresa_Giudice!