Ask Gloria

Jill Zarin's mother, Gloria, answers your questions.

Jul 21, 2009

I am Allie, 28 and have been in a  long distance relationship for about 2 years. A few months ago we decided to  work things out, move to be in the same city and make strides to have a  lasting relationship. Upon this decision, he recently revealed to me that  within the first few months we were together he slept with an ex-girlfriend.  After my wanting to know more, he told me he also was with another girl (no  sex) on two occasions during a weekend, who is still a friend of his group of  friends, who I have also met on several occasions. Her and a friend of his had  a child together and he is now the Godfather. He is very remorseful, but I am  disgusted. So my question is do you believe the saying "once a cheater,  always a cheater"?

Hi, I cannot make a judgment about all men, but I can about this loser. The best thing that he has going for him is you. I do not think you can build a relationship with someone who has cheated time and again on you. You must regain some respect for yourself. I would leave him and start a new life. Rent an apartment and find a new job and regain your self respect. If needed, seek counseling. Whatever you do, do not waste any more time on this relationship.  Good luck.