My mother has a mental disorder that the doctors have explained to me and they say she is capable of getting help and acting better towards my kids and me but she refuses to accept this is her issue to solve. She "kicked" us out of her life a few months ago, like the fifth time she has done this, but this time I didn't go back. I felt I needed to protect my kids from her abuse since I am fully aware of how bad it can get. My question is this, she is old and her health isn't good but she is still as abusive with her actions and words as ever. Society says I need to suck it up and put up with this till she dies, but I feel there just has to come a time in life when I can say enough is enough and I am going to live my life and protect my kids. What is your thought on this
Hi, Thank you for writing. I would continue to see Mom but without the children. You understand the problem, but they cannot, nor should they. You can keep the visits at a minimum. The reason I say you should consider seeing your mother is when she passes you will not feel at all guilty that you haven't been a "good child." Hope my advice will help you.
I have been married to this man for 28 years. I have 2 daughters, (neither one is his) 4 grandchildren and 2 great grandchildren. One of my daughters and one of my granddaughters and both of my great grandchildren live with my husband and me. They do not work. They are messy and sloppy and just a pain in the neck. We are spending money on them we dont have. My husband does nothing but complain day and night day and night. I dont blame him in a way. I hear him the first time her really doesnt need to keep it up day and night. That's all I ever hear from him anymore is him complaining. I'm getting so depressed and down I just want everyone to leave. Do you have any advise?
I am so happy you have truly found your calling. I never truly appreciated your advice throughout my life and just assumed everyone had a mommy like me. As I grew up I realized how special you are and how lucky I am. Thank you for sharing your gift with the world. Love, Jill
Gloria after being married for 35 years I realize that we are both unhappy over the fact our children are grown and leaving little for us to be involved with. My husband has decided that he needs to work even more than he did when we were younger, and has announced he cannot ever retire. My work life was interupted by an unexpected problem with my ankle, so I am not contributing financially, but I never did that much while raising the kids anyway. What kind of advice could you give about how to get our marriage on track so that we can enjoy our lives in old age? Why do people get so unhappy with one another?
You need to take control. Only you are in control of your own happiness and destiny. If this situation is getting you down, then you need to lay down the law. Have a serious talk with these guys and tell them how you feel; don't just assume that they know you're unhappy. Set guidelines, such as you need to pick up after yourselves and get a job for starters. Don't be a victim and allow people to walk all over you. Only you can own your advice; what they do with it is up to them and if they continue to thumb their noses at you, then maybe it's time for them to leave so you can regain your self respect. Take care of yourself first.
Hey! Just love you and the show!
I have two grandchildren. My daughter and there father have been divorced since the children were two and four. My daughters husband has adopted the children. He is so strict on them. His sixteen year old daughter is here for a month, and he bends the rules for her and not as strict, and babies her. It makes me furious! It just does not seem fair to me. Any advice? My grandchildren are six and eight.
All the best! Susan
your awsome.I lost my mother at 39 she was 66,19 days in the hospital.MY BEST FRIEND,LOVE OF MY LIFE.i miss her everyday,you will make Bethanny a great adopted daughter,I wish i were that lucky.THANK GOD i still have my dad,i live w/him.Im a 40 yr young gay white man in south florida.and i treasure my family.without them i would have died when i lost my mom.Jill is a lucky girl to have you.
Just wondering...what did you think of Kelly's exchanges with Bethany last season on RHNY? I LOVE your daughter she is so 'real'!
All the best, Robin
Gloria, I hope you can give me some advice on how to deal with going on with your life after the death of a child. My son was diagnosed with cancer at age 10. Brain Cancer. He went through 3yrs of treatment and we thought he had it beat. It came back 12yrs. later and it was so advanced there was no treatment. I took care of him and watched him die a little everyday. He died at age 23. My kids have always been my life and when I lost him. I lost myself. How do you go on. Any advice you can give I would appreciate.
November 20, 20, 2009
Dear Sweet Patient and Wise Ms. Gloria,
I only wish I had a loving, understand mother, like the mother you "seem" to be!! My mom is alive and around, unfornuately for me..., she is toxic..., I had to cut her loose. But, it is still very, very painful for me! I just wanted to let you know that, for someone like me! It means soooo much, to see that real "mothers",do and can love their daughters!
I divorced my first husband, because he really did not love me, this I judged from his "actions". My mother told me to go into the bathroom and cry. But to continue the marriage for marriage sake.
I re-married and now am going to celebrate my 15th year wedding anniversary this December 15, 2009. I am very happily married and my husband is very good to me and my family. But, she is not happy and mailed me a very ugly post card. Not even a private letter, a post card that any person handling it could read. Very insulting!
Any who, I just wanted to tell you and let you know! Watching how you talk and interact with people, that you are very "sweet" and insightful, a little judge judyish, but I love the truth. But you do not "pull" anyone's leg for the sake of being nice, truth is truth! My mom does not deal with truth too well, well..., not at all!
Any way, I am trying to winding this up, I love you as a person, and respect you as a mother, and experience "Humanbeing" a "Child of God"! Watching you, helps me not feel, so lost!
Love you, KCooper
What is the best advice you have when it comes to dealing with the teenage years. On the Real Housewives of OC, Lynn and her daugher Alexa are having problems. I have a 15 yr old girl and I can really relate to Lynn and her issues. Any advice??
You are the best!!
Concerned mom from NJ