When going to a first university visit, what is the proper attire for a young man (14)? He has been invited with the juniors to go see Ball State and Northwestern but everyone I ask just says for him to wear jeans. Is this correct dress code?
I say this in my book "better to overdress than underdress." I wouldn't want Noel to wear jeans - think khakis, a button down shirt with a sweater or sports coat is appropriate for his visit! First impressions are everything. Good Luck!
What is your take on cell phone privacy. Do you think it is acceptable to look in your significant others cell phone if you are suspicious? I am trying to get over some trust issues with my on and off boyfriend of 5 years, and he hates it when I "snoop" in his phone but every time I feel suspicious and look in his phone, my suspicions are usually confirmed. Is it rude and out of line for me to look? Or am I within my rights?
If you can't trust him and have to pry into his cell phone, you might think about finding another guy? He's already proven he can't be trusted. This is unhealthy behavior on your part and quite frankly you deserve better.
I am planning a college graduation party for my daughter. Is it proper to include the party invitation with the graduation announcement? The invitations were professionally printed, but are a little bit larger than the announcement. If both can be sent together, would it be acceptable to use the larger envelope from the party invitation as the outside envelope?
Thanks for your advice!
Congratulations! I think it's perfectly OK to send them together. Use the party invitation and send them both. Cheers!
I am going to the opera tonight. I saw that Alex planned to wear a FEED bag! Is this appropriate? What is appropriate opera attire? Thanks!
I think Alex's top was different and chic. Also consciously green, love that! She can dress up the top with great earrings and pair it with a beautiful skirt...I hope she doesn't forget her Jimmy Choos.
I just have to say that for a woman who prides herself on manners etc, heckling with a street vendor to save 30 dollars is laughable and slightly embarrassing, considering today's economy. Let's be honest, you can part with the 30 bucks, and he could probably really use it. I hate to use the word, but it was a cheap move.
From on Native American who has a passion for fashion to another, I have to ask where you got that wonderful necklace. Can you share? Thank you.
can you help your friend Kelly complete a sentence without the word "like". You have written a book and I'm sure you didn't "like" use the word "like" in every sentence of the book. She is a grown educated women that should be using proper english. Is she a left over Valley Girl?
I think you have the most gorgeous skin on the show. Please share your beauty regimens, make up tips, skin care products etc. etc. PLEASE! and anything else that can help the rest of us look like you!
We are busy planning a wedding (one of us is getting married and the other is the maid of honor) and we have an important wedding etiquette question. What is the protocol for inviting friends to the wedding whom the bride has had intimate relations with in the past? The bride has several friends with whom she has had intimate relations but has remained close friends with, thus she would like to extend invitations to them. Is this inappropriate? Please inform us!
Thank you and best wishes,
Julia and Angela
My husdbands niece will be getting married this spring. This will be a semi-formal evening wedding with an outdoor dinner reception to follow. The brides gown will be strapless and full length. The brides-maids and the mother of the bride will be wearing tea-length dresses. Of course I want to dress up, but I feel I should be a bit more understated. Any suggestions?
Dear Countess, Hi. This is very off of the topic, but I have a question for you, that you can hopefully answer. When I was watching the show, I saw that you sent your daughter, Victoria I believe, to a boarding school, I was thinking of sending my daughter to a boarding school as well, I wanted to know if you would tell me the name of the school. Also is it all girls? What is tuition? Also did Victoria like the school?
Yours truely, Loving mother
Sorry, but jeans are perfectly acceptable attire for a 14-year-old attending a Northwestern-Ball State game. He's 14, therefore, he's NOT on a visit where he'll meet with Admissions staff about attending school there. Therefore, no need to 'impress' anyone. Even at Northwestern, people wear jeans ;-)
I think you are one of the most pretentious people I have ever met. You are not qualified to give wardrobe opinions anymore than you are to give etiquette lessons. If history serves me right, your husbands relative that "built" the Suez Canal (you'd think single-handedly from your side of the story) was about to be arrested for fraud. The whole lot of them were about to be put into jail. Furthermore, when you supposedly go to help the "little people," all you do is talk about yourself and what you are and who your husband is. If you really want to do something to help, why don't you remember the oh so poor roots that you're really from and take one of your diamond rings and sell it and donate the money towards feeding poor people. You're deplorable. When you went out with the "bohemian" girl and tried to act cool, I nearly lost my dinner.
I bought your book and I just love it. It has some of the best advice for just practical politeness that I have seen.
Countess or not, you are a classy lady.
The only real moment that I have seen on this entire series is when The Countess from Berlin CT's daughter shopped at the "Salvation Army" store for the first time and was amazed at how inexpensive the bargains were. She bought an entire pile of things for $9.00. It was refreshing to see that someone had some sense and appreciation for something that does not cost $20,000.
I feel etiquete is essential in all walks of life regardless of your economic status. I did feel sad at the episode you visited the teen girls and were giving advice to a girl aspiring to be a model. She was devastated when you said that after she lost the weight... could you not have said that in private without the cameras? I felt horrible for her and the message of hope you tried to give was lost once you spoke those words. Not everyone lives in your circle and if you choose to do the charities how about a bit of research before hand??
Just wanted to let you know how much your advice is appreciated. It seems as though Americans, as a whole, are getting so "casual" in everything they do in life! I wish there were more positive influences like yourself in my world! What a great role model you are for your daughter, and those around you. Seems like you are teaching her to be a "Lady" and to have respect for herself. We are seeing less and less of that type of parenting these days! "Two Thumbs Up"! Can't wait to read your book!
Quick question: Is it okay to send out my graduation announcements after I actually graduate from college? I have exams all next week and I don't know if I'll have time to send them out beforehand. Is that okay?
THANKS! P.S. The NYC season is my favorite :)
We are baptizing our baby girl soon in the Catholic Church. I was thinking of wearing this pretty, semi casual long white dress. It was a dress I wore after getting out of my wedding dress, and going to dinner with my husband after our wedding. So it is an important dress to me. Anyways, I wasn't sure if only the baby wears white? Thanks!
My heart goes out to you and your children. I am divorced and my husband had a long standing affair and walked out on our 2 young boys as well as myself. That was almost 7 years ago and haven't seen him since. I pray that the Count will be a stand up man and never turn his back on the children, who by the way are beautiful!!! Good luck!!
Countess, someone needs to set Kelly straight. Her rudeness, and complete disregard for her guests really came through with her halloween party. I don't see how any of you women put up with her "...I'm so wonderfull, everybody wants to know me and is willing to wait any length of time until I choose to arrive to any event I throw..." In the words of Bethenny, Who does she think she is?
It truly amazes me that you place yourself upon a pedestal, and claim to have perfect manners. Every time I watch the show you manage to say inappropriate things, or present with a new faux pas. Telling a child that she has time to lose weight, saying rude things about Bethenny's photo layout, telling everyone to stop being rude and talking at a charity event while you continue to be rude and talk. I could go on, but you get the point. I believe that you need to take a hard look at your actions and police yourself before critisizing anyone elses behavior.
I think you are the most classy woman on the show, however it seems like you are very preoccupied with the title you derived through marriage, as if that is your only identity. Who are you without it?
We have friends who are very well off. Each time we are together she makes sure that I see her new piece of jewerly. Makes sure I know how much each of her items cost etc.. How do I handle this? One of the last time she called my new ring dainty... I know we are know where near the wealth they are - but, we do ok.
I received a very nice rolex for my 5th year anniversary. But, I would never dream of showing it off to other people much less tell them the cost.
Hi, Just wanted to know I think your great.Your a cool Mom and I love how you interact with your daughter.She seems to really love you.I treat my kids the same way,with respect and all that goes with them to make them a better adult.So many parents are so afraid to parent their kids and it shows when they throw their hissy fits and the parents bow down to them .Thats surely not going to help them grow up .They are going to be in for a big shock when they realize the world isnt going to kiss their behinds like Mom does.Good luck with your book and everything else.Im looking forward to the reunion show.
Do not advise that poor 14 year old boy to dress up like a prep school fop to go to a football game. The first impression he will make is that he's a pretentious jerk who wants to have his lunch money stolen.
Countess: I bought your book and what great reminders can be found within!! I was raised with a lot of the personal knowledge that you promote and found myself thinking, "Oh yes, how I remember doing that"!! Back then, (MANY years ago) table setting, grand manners and being beautifully attired was an event and one I had to learn to do; have found that as the years have gone by I haven't used as much of the information that I learned when I was a lot younger. Your book is a breath of fresh air without the stuffy formality of other protocol books out there!! (Emily Post).
You are the best woman on this show. You need to give those other girls your friends with some lessons on how to behave properly. At least someone on this show knows how to behave with class and dignity. I hate to see that you actually surround yourself by people like Ramona and Kelly. Bethanny is a good woman as well as Alex. Jill, I'm still on the fence about just because I strongly dislike whinny people like when she started whinny about her new Mercedes that her husband bought her. Apparently it wasn't good enough..humm...but I think she will grow on me.
Anyways, keep your head up with everything that is going on in your life and seriously you daughter is lucky to have such a wonderful role model.
I would like to say after watching the episode in which you visited the boys and girls club I was outraged and disgusted with you. The meeting with the girls was on self esteem and confidence, which every teen girl needs encouragement about and you turn around and basically tell a ten year old hey your too fat. When asked what they would like to be when they grow up, one girl said a model. You told her she was beautiful and tall enough and that she could always lose the weight. What is wrong with you? If I was that child's mother I would of really let you have it. Did you even think about what you were saying to her or what thoughts you might of given her? And we wonder why so many girls have eating disorders, before finishing your book on manners and the proper way to act, maybe you should do a little more research. Just because you are a countess does not give you free reign to say whatever you want to young children. You should be ashamed and find that girl and offer an apology to her and her family!
I admire you so much. And we have a lot in common, well except for the title and a house in the Hamptons. My father is Cherokee Indian. My mother is Irish. But, I'm so proud of my heritage. I don't know why you didn't mention it in the first season. Now, I'm here to ask a favor. And you're such a do-gooder, I just know you'll oblige me. That beautiful turquoise necklace you wore in the Us magazine shoot, would you be so kind to tell an Indian sister where I could find one. And don't worry, I have a count of my own who knows how much I love it. Please?!?!
And please Bravo, I write all the time and never see it. Would you please help me out, too?
Best regards, Ms. KJ Hutton
For a woman prides herself with having the upmost of manners, you were completely rude and disrespectful to those cancer patients at your cancer benefit. How dare you have a petty and inconsequential fight with someone abuot the age of your husband, in front of a terminally ill child!!! She is praying to make it to the age of 20 and you are fighting over how old your husband looks!! Be happy that he is alive and not fighting for his life like that brave girl.
Dear Countess, You are my favorite housewife and I love the way your house was decorated. I have a passion for decorating. I was wondering if you would tell me where you got your lamp at, that was cream/yellow in color and it had round circles or indentions in it? I really love that lamp and I would love to find one that imitates it.
Dear Countess~ What is the proper etiquette when you are out with a friend and when you speak metaphorically they react literally? It can be a tad bizarre and uncomfortable. Any suggestions? What does one do when a man somehow becomes involved in a girls night? What does one do when a guest in ones home tells another guest she wants her to die? Finally~what does one do when a friend clearly has a drinking problem or another friend clearly need to seek professional help? ~Confused~
Lu, you are clearly a class act and I love to watch you on account it inspires me to hold my head just a bit higher even though I don't have much in life. You know better than anyone that you don't need money to be classy.
Very Best, Karin
I am fan of yours and was pleasantly surprised to find out that you are part Native American and even more surprised to find out you were Mic Mac!! I am a member of the Mic Mac tribe as well! Anyway, just writing to wish you well!
you real on what really need to take a refresher course on the things that you are preaching. It seems that sometime you gorget whats proper tooo.
You are my favorite on the show. I watch very few television shows, but NYH is fun to watch. I just need to get back to my work and stop blogging! Thanks for mentioning your Native American heritage. Many fans out here have a mixed heritage, too.
your my favorite of the new york house wives. the only one with poise and manners !!!! and u r down to earth. good luck in all u do, u deserve the best, cause u r the best !!!!
My daughter and I are HUGE fans of the sbow, and we absolutely adore you! I discovered your blog for the first time just now, so I wanted to tell you how much I admire your class and elegance in the face of your recent personal situation. In fact, I think that THAT could be the subject of your next book, i.e. "how to carry on - WITH CLASS" when a marriage ends, especially when it ends in the midst of media glare...how to meet new men (with class), what to say to rude people who cannot mind their own business (with class), how to help your children deal with such a major life change (with class), what to wear and how to find a suitable male escort to social functions (with class), etc., etc.
I am happily married, but I would buy a book like that in a SECOND!!
Anyway, take care, good luck, and can't wait til season #3!!
I thought the comment you made to the girl (who said she wants to be a model) about her weight was rather rude. The comment to Bethany about her "touch up" wasn't very nice either.
hi to all of the nyc housewives. can't believe i have become so interested in this show. i live in a small town in oklahoma and can't imagine living in nyc. doubt i would fit in, but i love watching you. would like to know, is bethany a chef. if so would like to see more of her job and type of food she likes cooking the most. thank you for some really fun tv viewing.
I am completely enamoured by your turquoise collar necklace. I have searched the internet everywhere to find something like it with no luck. I am pretty sure I could never afford one like yours but could you please tell me where you purchased the necklace.
i really like the Countess. I find her down t earth and not FAKE as a couple of the other housewives. You know who you are. I think it is great that you sent your daughter off to school for the experince not to just get rid of her for awhile.I am sooo sorry about your marriage. Your family is in my thoughts
Hey Countess! I have to say, My husband and I both think you are truly a classy, and beautiful lady. We are your biggest fan, in fact I have learned a lot just from watching the show. I hope I can grow into a sophisticated woman such as yourself! Thanks Luann(thats my mothers name as well, BTW) Your biggest fans, Anna & Jeremy Smith in Dayton, Ohio
countess, i'm sure you are a lovely woman, but seriously? as a native woman myself, i have to ask. how do you justify your 'outfit' for the halloween party? aren't we dishonored enough without you wearing a pseudo native getup? regalia is such an important part of who we are and must be held sacred. to wear a sacajawea-esque outfit is really sad to me. you may mean to honor your heritage, but believe me, the next party you go to someone will be wearing dyed turkey feathers and a tacky fringed dress. you need to be more of a role model for your children. you can be proud without mocking us all.
Countess, What a classy lady you really are and the best thing on NYH. I adore your fashion sense and often try to use you as a guide to what I will wear to certain events. I have seen you wear a beautiful turquoise necklace in several episodes and love it. can you tell me where you purchased it and if you can recommend where I might purchase one like it or something in that design. Keep up the good work on your show. You and Jill make the show the a success.
I love love love the purple dress you wore to the private party at Saks hosted by Jill. Who was that? Where did you get it? You always dress wonderfully and I especially loved this for a great night out. Please share!
In my eyes you will always be the Countess. Everything I have seen about you, you have always carriend yourself as a Strong WOMAN. Much respect to you. Before I ask the 1st qustion... I was curious are you really NATIVE? I'm only a half-breed myself. But if you are, truly a woman the rest of us to look to. You are a hero. My question is... I have been single woman for many years, have been a single, working mom. I have no fashion at all. I wear black shirts & light jeans always. So, my question is how can a growing girl like me EVER find anything Cute to wear? On a budget? I Do have date comimg up, thats why I am asking. Thank you so much if you really answer.... - D AKA... -NATIVE PRIDE & ONE LOVE!!