Let's not blow my meeting with Jill out of proportion. I'm not Jill's long lost parent ambushing her. We were actually very close friends. It really isn't something to get crazy about. Ramona simply wanted to ensure that we met. Jill and LuAnn like to over dramatize everything, so they made this like a scene from West Side Story. In actuality, Ramona said stop by and talk to Jill. Big deal. Everyone lived.
Jill knows more than anyone how badly I hoped that having a career and a relationship was possible. Not everyone has a Bobby to take care of them financially. I'm passionate about my career and I've never kept that a secret. I have never let my work get in the way of my friendships, including my friendship with Jill. Jill pieces together information to build a case against whoever she is against at the moment, whether it be me, Alex, or Ramona. I was balancing my relationship and work, and I have no regrets. It is why I am where I am in my life.
LuAnn was behaving like a third grader who didn't want her new best friend making up with their old one. Everyone has experienced this in grammar school. I found it hilarious and narcissistic that LuAnn was personalizing our whole meeting. It frankly had absolutely nothing to do with her, yet she continued to insert herself. She might want to get a hobby too.
Jill was in the wrong and she definitely regrets her actions. Unfortunately, much of the damage is irreparable. But I finally feel peace now. What is important now is my marriage and baby, and to quote Jill, I don't want the toxicity in my life.
Bethenny is a survivor in a good way! Jill has to understand the balance of every relationship changes as it grows and you have to accept that--you can't micromanage friendships which is probably why Bethenny made that comment. Just because Jill helped her does not mean she owns her. On the other hand--I can understand Jill feeling hurt about Bethenny not coming to visit Bobby--at least she should have called him. They should just make up, understand and forgive each other's weaknesses.
B. I thjnk you are great. I was born in hell, raised in hell, lived in hell all my life,so I know a thing or two about life.Im 57,by the way.Ilove the way you think girl. Dont sweat the small stuff, you have more important things to think about than jills childishness.Keep up your friendship with Alex,shes real andcares about you.congrats on everything.Love ya GG
Bethenny, Congratulations on your marriage and the upcoming birth of your baby! It's exciting to see how far you've come since the first season of the show. It's refreshing to see that you and Alex and Ramona don't take yourselves to seriously and that you're not bogged down by petty issues. I'm glad that you have such supportive people in your life that aren't picking on you every episode of the show like people had been in past seasons. I think its safe to say that the most recent episodes are showing the kind of person Jill Zarin really is and what kind of school yard bullying has been going on. And that stupid ex-countess has been getting on everyone's nerves, putting her two cents in whenever she can. From all the nonsense that's said and perpetuated through every episode I'm glad that you have kept a level head and continue to please your fans with your fabulous one-liners. You are so much fun to watch! And you're in fabulous shape to be a pregnant mommy thats almost due. Congratulations again, and we all wish you a safe and healthy delivery, as well as a long and happy marriage!
Bethenny, I am SOOOO happy for you!!! You are in such a good place in your life. I am still trying to make heads or tails of the Jill fallout. All I know is I keep watching the shows for this season over and over and have noticed such a HUGH difference in Jill. The two of you together the past seasons is the reason I watched the show. I feel bad for both of you for the things that happened over the summer. I am still trying to understand it as I said before and hope this will come to better light in episodes to come. I am not liking the Jill I see this season and you can tell she is hurting inside for doing and saying some of the things she has said and done. Once again, I am SOOO happy for you and Jason - YOU DESERVE IT!!!!!! Can't wait it see the rest of this season and the reunion show!!!
I just want to take a moment to tell you CONGRATULATIONS! You are going to be a great mother, I know it because you are an awesome person. I have watched every show and you are by far my favorite housewife and person on the show. As for Jill Zarin, well, honey you hit the nail right on the head when you described her and it shows more and more on every show.
As for your situation with your father, I can relate. I haven't spoken to my father for almost 20 years. All you can do Bethany is reach out to him if that's what you want to do and if he doesn't want to see you, well at least your tried. You can't make people love and care about you, you have to do that yourself but at least you can go to bed at night with a clear heart and mind and know that you tried your best. My heart weeps for you Bethany because I know that kind of pain and it never goes away. But it does get easier to deal with and with the birth of your own child you will come to realize that. Give that baby all the love that you didn't get from your Father as I know that you will. I wish you and Jason all the best! Keep being yourself and walk with your head held high!
Your the best!!! Don't listen to any negative things anyone has to say about you, your amazing! PA loves you!!! Congrates on the baby and the wedding! :):):) xoxox
I just wanted to say that I understand what you are going through with Jill. I just had something like that happen to me with a friend at work. I thought we were good friends. One day she was talking about not feeling well and being nauseous so as a woman I automaticlly asked her if she could be pregnant. I was at work when i asked but I certainly was not loud about it and no one was really around. WELL, that was it for my "supposed" friend. She got real upset with me and even after apologizing several different ways she would not forgive me. She ignored me the rest of the week at work and then out of the blue without saying a word to me she started acknowledging me but we were not back to being friends.
Then to even more mimick your thing with Jill, my friend started to "replace" me with another girl at work who she was not as good friends with prior to this all happening. I bet that sounds familar since Jill all of a sudden took on Luan as her best buddy! In my case my frend is a lot younger than me and i suppose i could chalk this up to being that she is too immature but it does hurt my feelings, and it makes it hard to be at work everyday.
I haven't seen the episode where Jill realizes that she made a mistake and seems to want to make ammends but really think about if this is someone you want as a friend. Someone who will blow things out of proportion. I wish you luck with everything. You seem like a great person and just remember that girls are mean and it is hard to have good girl friendships.
Bethenny - Congratulations on where you are in your life. You are such a funny, interesting, loving person and you deserve all the best. I wish I could have a friend like you. Jill was an idiot for letting that friendship get away, but I think you are better off. Alex is a much better person and I hope your friendship continues to blossom.
Dear Bethenny, Hi am a fan of all of ya'll. I want to tell you i don't side with you or jill but from a person that lost her bf try to work things out. I regret that i was not there for my friend when she most need me. I lost my friend 11 yrs ago she kill herself , she try to call me and talk to me and i didn't even try. i begian a new life with a new husband and kids, but what i had forgotten that my friend was there for me when i got divorce from my 1st husband. i had it really hard with him and if it wasn't for my friend i would been dead and my 3 kids wouldn't have a mother. i was a wife who was beaten and my oldest son saw all(he was 2) , she was there to pick me up and tell me that my life wasn't over. when i met my 2nd husband she was happy for me ,but what did i do when she join the marines i wasn't there for her i didn't even got see her when she finish boot camp. She would call me and i would say well we're busy,when her dad died i wasn't there at all. i stop and think about her when my kids ask me and tell me mom why do you not have a friend. i don't like hanging or talking to women cause thy are to a pain, i should know ,(LOL) but the town i live in is small and everyone knows everyones crap(sorry). I think you should try to work things out people shouldn't side or tell you what to do,look back at the good times you had. beacause there will come a day like i have them that you will miss your friend. you can say she is out your life but, not out your heart or memories you 2 have made. Good luck with your baby.
From a fan from TEXAS
Bethany I think you are the most solid person! I wish romona would take a chill pill while she is renewing herself that would be a huge thing for her instead of telling everyone how they should handel this or that! I am so happy for your marrage to Jason and the new Life you two will be bring into the world very soon!! wish i could meet you in person and if you need a nanny I know of one whoes wonderful!! good luck with the new bambiano!! and the calmness in your new life!
You went over, above and beyond. The thing I love about Luann jumping to Jill's defense is that history has proved that the rescuer is usually the next victim.
I do have a bone to pick with you. I am addicted to Skinny Girl margaritas. (GASP!!!!)You never mentioned they were habit forming.
First I want to say Congratulations on your marriage and your pregnancy. I am so happy for you. You are my favorite Housewife out of all the shows. The reason I wanted to comment on this post is that this particular show had me almost in tears. I cannot imagine someone opening their heart up to me like you did and not being able to get past it. Your words really got to me. I wanted to shout, "I will be your friend! I forgive you!" lol Actually I wasn't ever sure that Jill should be forgiving you anyway. It should be her begging your forgiveness. You were right about her all along. She was acting like Jr. High School girls with everyone listening on your phone conversation. It was almost as if Jill kept being so mean because she would have to back down in front of Lu Ann. Like she was trying to impress "the Countess". Whatever... I am so glad you are moving on.
I feel like I can relate to you as far as your Dad goes. My Dad is ill too and we do not have the best of relationships. I go between feeling sorry for him and mad as he** all in about one minute. It is sad really but very difficult to control how I feel. Right or wrong, you can't change how you feel.
I saw you on "Watch What Happens" the other night. You were very funny. As always. Best Wishes to you and your new family.
You and Jill each share the blame for the failure in your friendship. Jill was a true and loyal friend to you at a time when you needed it most and you seemed to need and thrive in the comfort of her support. What makes a good friendship is accepting each other as you are - and you and Jill worked because she is primarily a nurturer and you needed/wanted her nurturing.
As a viewer, it was apparent that Jill felt disconnected from you over the summer months and missed your interaction - in addition to needing your support for Bobby. It's a compliment. It seemed that once you had your life together - the guy, the career, etc. you resented her nurturing(and sometimes annoying) ways and you lashed out at her ("get a hobby"). In the past, you may have communicated your annoyance with her, but without such severity. Basically, it seemed you didn't need her anymore and you let her know it. And, that is why Jill could not face you and why she did not want to be around you. She gave and you took, until you didn't need her anymore. You humiliated her - whether you realize it or not.
When you finally reached out to her in an attempt to salvage the friendship - during filming, of course! - you failed to take serious the damage you caused to the friendship. Jill was even further humiliated by your comments - which swirled around her thanks to the other cast members.
The mock-peace talk at Ramona's house was ridiculous and cannot be compare to Jill's trying to arrange peace between you and whatshername. You and Jill were much closer friends and it was to be much more emotional discussion than that of two newly acquainted people. If Jill wanted to meet behind closed doors - and you truly wanted to save your friendship - you should have agreed. This entire argument likely would have been over once you both left the room. Imagine that.
Jill was immature at many things, but many can sympathize with her because she was coming from a place of hurt and humiliation. She should have just walked over to you once she heard about you engagement and offered her best wishes. Instead she needed the support of Bobby to make the approach - and then proceed with nervous mindless banter. So what. It just seems that in her moment of absolute and obvious nervousness, you resented her weakness and kicked her to the curb - yet again.
Look, Jill is not perfect, but neither are you or any of us. She is still the same person that took you in her arms and gave you a family when you needed it most. As a viewer of the lives-that- you-all-put-on-tv, I just find it sad that after all is said and done that you and Jill can't relish in the celebration of your new family - that now conveniently she is a "toxicity" that you don't want around. Jill has her faults, but she's a nice lady and a loyal friend - and whether she has a rich husband or not - she seems to be the kind of person who loves who she loves no matter what.
APOLOGIZE and accept her apology. You may never again have life-discussions in her bed an entire summer - but you can share the joys and hardships of marriage and parenthood with a wonderful woman who loves you like a daughter and best-friend - even when the cameras aren't around.
For what it's worth, I've never posted a blog entry before now but this breakdown of a friendship actually move me to do so.
I hope you sit and read the comments because I cant stress enough how wrongly you have been treated and you have every right to have been upset. that said, you have more important things in your life. Much joy is ahead for you because karma does catch up with you and you deserve happiness. Alex is a very smart woman and will be a good friend. you two stick together!
Enjoy your marriage and your baby!
Forget the drama queens!
Reality comes back when that bundle of joy pees in your face. LOL, maybe you can get your child to do it to the immature housewifes.
You're a smart, funny & honest woman, DON'T CHANGE!
Little advice, when your baby sleeps, you sleep! Don't think you have to do it ALL. This is the one time you can't and give up that control, girlfriend!
Much happiness to you & your husband!
Sincerely, Mary Beth
Bethenny, Your attempt to extend the olive branch to Jill was more than honorable. You have done your part and now the ball is in her court. You obviously valued your friendship with her or you wouldn't be so upset by her refusal to sit down with you and talk about it. Ironically, she also valued the friendship, or she wouldn't be so angry/hurt. Communication is everything. Without it we attach our own meaning to the actions of others (i.e. she didn't call bc she doesn’t care vs the reality of, she didn't call bc she didn't know the severity of the situation). Bottom line, relationships take work, and sometimes we unintentionally hurt those who we care about, what’s important is that we are willing to at least try to work it out. You have done what you can and now you need to focus on yourself and your new family! You have had a difficult life and now you deserve all the best. That starts with not having friends who make you cry!!! Please, stop spending time with Romona.
Bethenny, By far, You are my favorite NY housewife! I loved you this season and feel like you have been picked on this season a lot! Friends will come in and out of your life and as long as you have those few people that you can depend on, all that other junk will fade away. Keep your chin up and focus on all the wonderful blessings that have now come into your life :) YOU are so very BLESSED.
I am so happy for you! I so glad to you ha found true love and having a baby! You havebenn given the greates gift! Being a parent is the most rewarding thing in life. Jill needs to forgive u! Life is sooooooooooo short! Good luck!
I'm soooo proud of you, You have worked hard and finally have what you deserve. A handsome husband, child on the way, books, wonderful career and peace in your heart. Keep looking forward, don't turn back. I really think Jill loves to keep this going because SHE gets so much more attention if she does. If you guys kiss and make-up, then it's about every one. If she keeps it going, then there is always the DRAMA......
Bethenny your amazing! You did more then you had to when it comes to patching things up with Jill she really showed her true colors this season and she's loosing tons of fans because of it! You continue staying real and best of luck with your new baby!
First off, you're all acting like a bunch of high school girls including YOU Bethenny! Step off the school bus because you are about to be a mother! It's obivous you don't really get along with most of the women on the show so why do you keep inserting yourself? I get that it's a show but really? Between Kelly, LuAnne, Ramona, and now Jill, who needs enemies when you have friends like that? I guess it's all in the name of entertainment but I sure do hope these are just your "TV" friends and you actually have real friends off the set.
it seems that if you wanted to repair the friendship you would not have been on the attack, and blaming Jill for "the card isn't right", etc... You do not say the nicest things about any of other women, so why are you so offended?
I think that Jill has been the same since the show first came on, and it seems as long as it was beneficial to you that you were great friends but once you didn't need her anymore than bye bye baby. If you were really a good friend you would have showed up when Bobby was in the hospital. That doesn't change the fact that I love watching you.
You are my absolute favorite. I hope you never change. Please do not let the toxicity ruin all you have going for you!
I think you have done all you can do to repair your relationship with Jill. She was definitely in the wrong to put your message on speakerphone. I wish you all the best in your marriage and with your baby.
I've never blogged because I can't imagine that any of you have time to read any of this...but...I saw Jill on 'After the Show' and she said she didn't know about your dad--uh hello! What was the conversation about when Alex tried to talk sense into her head and let her know? My, my! Bethenny, I have watched you in all of the seasons and I think you have done a great job, especially for someone who has had to be so independent. Alot of us have some sort of family who we can ask for advice and who know us better than we know ourselves. People who will stand beside us when we we're out there facing challenges. Or who will just listen and nod when we need an ear. Followed by a hug if needed. You have done ALL you have done all these years without, I gather from the show, any immediate family to lean on. I'm so glad you now have you're husband and father of your baby and the beginning of your own family. If you only say nice things about people it will come back to you and it will bless you and your family in the end. It's not always the easiest, but anyone can say something hateful, it takes a special person to think of something nice to build someone up and make them feel better, we all want to be loved. Hugs
Bethenny, I can tell you form going throught the samething you are with Jill, is that sometimes you lose those friends that you love the most when you find that one person you are ment to be with. I did when I met my husband. Just do what you are doing and make a wonderful life with Jason and the new baby!!!
Bethenny, After trying to reconcile with Jill two times on national tv, you have done all you could do. I think that even if Jill does want to be friends again it is mostly because she is being attacked for her poor behavior. Dont let her back in. She will never get over this with you and although she may seem like she is going to move on, she wont. It will be brought up all the time. Move on like you are doing, you have your hubby and baby soon. Thats all you need.
you are an amazing person !!!!!! (and so funny too) Poor Jill had it coming...you cant be mean to people and get away with it...what goes around comes around.If your a positve person as you are, good things will happen,and continue.(not like some people Mrs.Jill) p.s. Jill & Luann deserve each other..
Bethany, I posted earlier with advice about trying to hold back a bit and to pick your battles. I want to apologize. After watching more eisodes I am shocked at Jill's mean-girl side. Not sure what is up with her - but you definately deserve better. You were a good friend to her. Here is wishing you continued peace, happiness, and dreams come true. By the way you are going to fall so ga ga in love with your bayboo that Jason will barely be able to contain your desire for another. Best wishes and I am sorry for bad advice.
bethany,my husband loves you!! and so do i. jill is being a real jerk! as far as im concerned. she lost a great friend.move on and shine in your new married life and endeavours.
B-you are the bomb! You give so many women a feeling of empowerment and confidence that I think our society is still thirsting for. I hate to bring up Jill, but seriously-I don't know what has gotten into her this season-very weird and very scary! You are so right ab them playing the best friend role a little too much-reminds me of Kim and Sheree from ATL--you know the whole, "you are beautiful, no you are beautiful" crap--well we all know how that turned out! Continue to keep your faith alive and your family fulfilled and the Lord will continue to bless you. :)
Bethany sorry to see your friendship with Jill has gone sour. Just forget about her. She is jealous of whatever she doesn't get full attention from. Just like when she was asked to be apart of the Brooklyn fashion show. She was so negative from the chairs, to everyone walking down the runway, to not saying good job. She is ridicious & not a good friend to try and keep. Just let her go. There are a lot of other people in this world. Most of the girls on the show are jealous because your prettier, more logical, & are more successful. If you leave the show....so do I.
Bethany: I think you have handled this Jill drama with grace and dignity. Congrats on your wedding and baby, and may you always be as happy as you are now! You make this show work!
Bethenny, I didn't like you at first when I thought you were like the others, talking about others and stuff but I see you have evolved into a very mature personality, keep being dignified girl, it's the way to go, don't let the money and shiny stuff take away your heart, Life is much more than that. I think maybe that's why I like Alex, she seems like a nice person too, not ridiculously high strung like Jill or Luann of course no one is perfect. Big Congratulations on your marriage and the baby. God bless you.
Don't ever change! You are the most real person on the show! Congrats on the baby and your marriage. I love watching you on the show!
Bethany, most of those women on the show are very jealous of you. They are very childish and they resent you for your success. If I were you, I would stop apologizing to Jill. Eventually, she"ll get over it. These women like to see you down, so stop giving in to them. They pride themselves on you feeling bad. Keep your head up tell those whores to get a life and a "hobby".
I am so happy for you and your husband. You will make a good mother because you won't make the mistakes you feel your parents did. Just stay away from Jill. She and the Countless can have each other. Your a better person. I have found that when your friend can turn on you like that then they aren't really your friend. So you need to concentrate on your baby and your husband. Good luck to you. You and Alex are my favorites.
I hope you stay on the show... i happy thta have man of dreams and the baby on the way.. you will be wonderful mother.......smiles i hope you and jill will be come friends again some day....
Your biggest fan, jennifer xoxo
Bethenny I couldn't be happier for you in all your wonderful blessings. I appreciate how you have felt about Jill's behavior. She was wonderful to you when you needed her but the minute you started to heal and you situation started to improve (thanks to a lot of Jill's support) she reacted like you were ungrateful! It was time for you to step out from her mothering and get yourself back on track. Isn't that ultimately what she wanted for you too? How can that be betrayal? Were you only important to her while you needed a friend? I don't get it but have known people like this. Sometimes the price of their friendship is too high...I hope that you can try to settle your feelings about your father. Family ties are so difficult to resolve and learn to live with when there isn't any real closure. Choose how you react to it though, don't let it dictate how you let your feelings go. There are truly good, loving people around and they will show themselves if you really see them with an open heart.
Bethany, you are the only reason I keep watching the show. I really loved how you have tried to take the steps to amend a relationship with another person. So Bravo to you - and thumbs down for Jill. She is starting to make my skill crawl. Anywaays, you don't owe her anything and you don't need her or LuAnn's approval - you are way more beuatiful than them inside and out. I would have told all those ladies to jump off the Brooklyn Bridge by now :O) Ramona just needs to put a sock in it and permanently tape her moth shut - I'm tired of hearing it (they are all fake) A true friend will poor goodness and inspiration into your life not not defeat and negativitiy :O)
Bethenny, I give you props for your will and effort of trying to fix your relationship with Jill. She seemed very self-centered and selfish about the situation. You are beautiful and compassionate. I wish you the best!!!Good luck and God bless!!
You are the only "real" representation of New York. I found it really Vile that when Jill was talking to you on the phone( on Speaker as Luanne listened, Really?!!) about Bobby and Thyroid Cancer, instead of using that "TV" moment to create awareness of the Cancer, she used the moment to make superfluous comments” my husband had his throat slit from ear to ear”, to generate guilt. It was an irresponsible comment on her part, and insulting to everyone who has the cancer, or is a survivor.