I feel that Bethany should forgive Jill and that they should start their friendship fresh and take their time there is a love there that nothing can ever destroy and that is unconditional love.
First, I want to say that this season has been a humbling experience. I never knew how many people really care about me and my family. A fan called me at home this morning to wish me good luck on the book tour that starts today. What can I say? I am embarrassed by some of my behavior and no matter what I say or do I can't make everyone happy. I tried that. It doesn't work. So ... I will be who I am and people will either love me or hate me, but I am the real deal. The show doesn't always portray that, obviously. The show is meant to entertain, intrigue and keep you watching to see what happens next. So, what do YOU think I should do? You will have to watch and see what happens. But if you know me, you know I will always TRY to do the right thing. I am not perfect, but who is?
Our new book Secrets of Jewish Mother is a book of lessons and stories based on the lives of three REAL women. A family. We know we're not perfect, and we know that our lives have played out in a way to teach us lessons, and we hope we can pass those lessons onto others. I hope, if nothing else, you each see how holding a grudge too long can destroy a friendship. If the friendship was real one day it will be better, if not, it was not meant to me. I can't kill myself over it. All I can do is apologize, apologize and apologize. After that, I have to move on as difficult and sad as that is. The truth is, I was mad that Bethenny only decided to talk to me on camera. After my initial shock, I asked Bethenny if we could talk privately OFF CAMERA in the bedroom. That was my test. She said no. She would only talk to me on camera. It just reinforced that this was for a TV show and nothing was real. My head was spinning. I wanted to run away, but I stayed. I was scared. I was in front of a room full of 30 people with four cameras in my face. How was I supposed to act? What do I say? I wanted to make up, but not on TV. I resented it and was not going to be a puppet for anyone. I felt "set up," "ambushed" or whatever you want to call it. I was pissed. Ramona's heart was in the right place, but I wish she had given me the heads up. I would have been prepared. If Bethenny had called me to talk off camera, things would have been different. Shoulda, coulda, woulda. We have all been there. Now let's move on.
I feel that Bethany should forgive Jill and that they should start their friendship fresh and take their time there is a love there that nothing can ever destroy and that is unconditional love.
Jill I love you! I am still a fan of yours. I watch the show cause you are on it. Please don't leave cause the show cause I beleive in you!I don't care what the other in America say. Did they see the same show I did. Bethenne started this ordeal with her vicious mouth and her uncool one liners. I don't care for them. If you don't come back I will not watch the show. Still a fan!
I really thought you were the best in the earlier seasons. This season you went wacko. You were so influenced by Luann and drawn into gossip it's shameful. I think it's sad you ruined such a fun relationship with the immature attitudes and "my way or the highway" attitude. Things happen for a reason I always say. I think it's unfortunate for you but possibly better for Bethenny. You weren't really her good friend after all.God bless you all... you all need it.
Jill ~ Alex is correct! You HAVE been a "Mean Girl" and you've been conducting yourself as if you are i still in high school. The first season of the show, you were my absolute favorite housewife. That changed gradually over the months, and now Bethenny & Alex are my faves, hands down. They are the only two NY Houswives who are, for the most part, fair-minded and conduct themselves as grown women should. Take a long, hard look at yourself. Everything you accuse everyone else of doing - and all the negative labels you toss around - describe your own behavior more than anyone else's. Wise up before you are left with NO friends!
Jill, I love you and your family values... Love love love your mother... she is so down to earth... but, I am a little sad about one thing... LuAnn,she seems a little bit overwhelming... and I think if she was not that involved you and Bethany would still be friends.
Jill, I've always enjoyed you and Bethenny on the show, but you have really disappointed me this season. You talk a good game but you are not true to what you say. LuAnn and Kelly are just clinging on to you because they never liked Bethenny and you either for that fact, your problem was between you and bethenny .
You claim you were so hurt after Alex delivered that message to you but you did the same to Bethenny on the speaker phone in front of LuAnn and a staff in your home and dont forget about America, and then you had the nerve to lie and say you were alone.
Shame on you Jill, ever heard of reap what you sow sweetie!!!!!
Jill u told Bethenny first that u were done.Now u r mad because she doesn't wont anything to do with u. It's called KARMA!!!Stop the fake crying
Maybe what Bethany wanted was to "Let everyone see you Apologise on T.V." Since that was the format YOU CHOSE TO HUMILIATE HER ON?!You know the phrase "WE'RE DONE"! Shame on You,and I did like you,and had respect for you BUT NOT ANYMORE! I think it's time for Bethany to tell you and your Goon's(Kelly,Luann) That SHE IS DONE WITH YOU ALL 3!She has a Full and Happy Life now! Let you feel her pain for a change!
U and Bethanny cracked me up when u were friends. Sad to see how things are now, I know u both still care - hope u can get past the hurt?
I've watched this show from the 1st episode. You were always my favorite. I don't know why this season seems to have brought out your true colors and honestly, I'm a little dissapointed. You've become boring, whiney and a victim. You are just a walking commercial. All you ever mentioned on your facebook page was something you were plugging, selling, etc. Even this blog is one big commercial for all the things you are selling or a spokesperson for. Shame Jill, shame.
Of course you wanted to talk to Bethanny "off-camera". I'd be too embarrassed if I wre as wrong as you, too! And it still seems it's the Jill Way or the Highway! Get over yourself and get some manners and niceness - and drop the mean!
I have another comment, I know how it hurts when your husband has a major medical or your family has a REAL problem and who you thought is your best friend or one of them, neglects to say or do anything or be there for you. That ruined a years long friendship for me. I had actually saved this woman's life, then she snubbed me, you don't get over that.
Hi Jill, I have been following this show all season. I think the disagreement you had with Bethany should have been between you and her. Once lines are drawn and others get involved thing get out of proportion. I think you wanted support of your friend Bethany when your husband was going through everything he did. When she was not able to be there the way you wanted it hurt deeply. Sometimes when people feel hurt they do not see the whole picture. letting go of the hurt is difficult. I see you trying to make amends, and maybe in time Bethany can let go of her hurt. The people that can hurt us the most are the ones we love. Don't give up on your friendship. Just keep everyone out, and Bethany should do the same. Good Luck
I have to say Jill, you were always one of my fav's. I've been a fan since the beginning.(First blog I've written by the way.) I have to say, I have been in a similar situation as you and B. Me being the B. I know editing plays a part, but I have to say--shame on you. When a friend comes to you in whatever situation, crying, basically begging and apologizing, and you say "I didn't feel like making up that day." Wow. Hopefully you don't test too many people like that because otherwise you will end up still fabulous I'm sure, but very, very alone.
Jill - you are the most interesting housewife to watch because your insecurities which lead you to be brazen and inconsistent are so much like all of us who are at your age and going through life. You do try your best but your lack of love for others leads you to be mean and hurtful... learn how to love based on TRUST. You trust your family and when you are with them, you are adorable and fun. I hope you learned alot from watching yourself this season. I learned so much about myself. Keep loving, growing, and living. All the best.
I have to say that I was really disappointed in the way you handled your relationship fall out with Bethanny. We may not have seen everything that went on behind the scenes but we did see Bethanny do her best to apologize to you and let you know how much she missed your friendship. You really seemed to want nothing to do with her. I think you made yourself clear in that you did not want to listen to what Bethanny had to say, regardless of how heartfelt she was, or how sorry she seemed for her mistakes.
I found it interesting when you suddenly took an interest in what was going on in her life after the fact. If you had moved on I don't understand why you even cared that Bethanny's dad had died and you were not told, or that she was pregnant and getting married. I feel you let the show get to you just as much as you feel Bethanny let the cameras lead her communication with you. I feel sorry for both of you.
I was touched to see what a great relationship you have with your mom and sister and I would think that you would have felt compassion for Bethanny not being as fortunate in her life. Your mother seems to have wonderful advice to share and I hope that you are going to her for wisdom regarding your future friendships. Hopefully it won't be too late for you to repair your relationship with Bethanny.
I also hope you see that Luanne is simply reveling in the whole breakdown between you and Bethanny. If anyone is acting like they are in high school it is that woman. I am sure once she finds another man to occupy her time you and Bethanny will both be old news.
I was the mother of four young children when my husband was diagnosed with colon cancer ten years ago so I know how stressful and frightening it can be. I know that through that experience your priorities change drastically; life is just too short. Stand back and look at who you want in your life and if you miss Bethanny throw your pettiness aside and tell her that. It's sometimes hard not to get caught up in "the moment", especially with cameras running. Just remember who you are and where you came from... and when all else fails ask your mom what you should do. :)
I don't think people are disenchanted with you because of some misunderstanding you may have had with Bethenny. Your general lack of consideration for others feelings and the constant nitpicking is obviously turning some people off. Who wants to be around that type of negativity? I wouldn't. I hope you find peace.
How many episodes do we have to see with Jill fuming at not being informed about some juicy tidbit? Once again the main point of her tears and arguments are over the (lack of) information sharing. In the first season reunion Jill was the most upset because Alex had not told her about the nude photos coming out. Then she came up with the statements about not liking the nudity. Of course she was supportive of Kelly's nude shoot this year, because Kelly told her about it first. In last night's episode Jill's reaction is specifically about Ramona knowing something but not telling her. Jill even tried to say that SHE told Ramona first - and when she couldn't get credit for that Jill started the "you should have told me" rant. There was no "poor Bethenny - we should do something to help her" rant because that is not what Jill really cares about. Thank you Alex for calling Jill to task about the gossip. Jill further showed her character by saying what she thought would hurt Alex the most "well we won't be in the same social circle." High school indeed!
Jill-You are the ultimate New Yorker; gossipy, catty, very competitive and you don't have a mean bone in your body. I have noticed that whenever you realize you have hurt someone you immediately apologize and you take responsibility. It seems to be a game that New Yorkers play and you are very good at it. Alex is not good at it, she takes everything personnally and certainly holds onto things way too long. I was sorry to see you fall out with Bethanny. I think she was also good at playing the "New Yorker" game and the two of you together were very funny on camera. But this isn't entertainment, it's life and things happen.
Jill, There is a reason you have 7 times more posted comments than anyone else - not because you are well liked, but because people want to tell you how wrong you have been!!! 98% of the comments are negative toward you. You need to own this Jill, and respond by blogging - isn't that part of the deal with Bravo? You can't handle it when you are called out - but you do it to people ALL THE TIME! You truly are full of yourself. Some advice... blog about the NYC housewives and not about the other shows. You seem to think that your take on their lives is something viewers want to know - we don't. People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones!!!!
Jill my best friend and I have watched you this season. You were always the friend in our head. We realize there are a lot of things we do not see, but my friend and I both feel that something is making you very unhappy you have lost that witty sense of humor, and your soft spot which we only get to see with your very lovely daughter Alley ( I am sure I spelled it wrong) We want Jill back... the lovely kind fun Mom to all Jill that is positive you know the Jill Bobby fell head over heels for... The one in the first season. Good luck Jill we are there for you in G.C NY and Tampa FLa.
Hey Jill, What is it that you are looking for? You told Bethany several times that you were done with her and now you want back into her life, because WHAT??? she's with child and getting married and the attention will be on her??? Kind of selfish of you isn't it? Let Bethany be happy for once she is in conflict between the joy of the occasion and her dad. Jill keep your focus on the COUNTLESS, there is your conflict and your drama. I only hope for your sake you know how to put down a snake.
Bwaaahahahhaaa! I love it! You just yack yack yack about everyone and it's ok, but someone says something unflattering about you and it's the end of the world. If it's NOT about you, you MAKE it about you. It's all about JILL JILL JILL!!! ME ME ME!!!! Bethenny's father is dying...WHAT??? and NO ONE TOLD YOU??? BOOHOOHOOOOOO!!! You're out of the loop!!! How can that be??? Wow, this must be how you feel all day long. Just how does everything affect you? Who cares about everyone else? As far as I'm concerned Alex didn't go far enough!
Jill, You have spoiled the original social chemistry between the cast members of The Real Housewives of New York. It seems in all of your false pride you can't handle fame. I am loosing interest in the show. It's becoming more demoralizing that the worst episode of The Jerry Springer Show. Regretfully, I am not interested in watching what unfolds for the rest of this season. I hope the Bravo franchise has the good business sense to realize that your vanities are approaching a level of obscenity and absurdity that viewers can't relate to!
I never write on these blogs but seeing your behavior this seasion I couldn't help but write in. First off I would like to say that Jill you have always been my favorite but this season as Alex would say you are a "Mean Girl". I think you and Luann's behavior has been so inappropriate. It seems that it was ok with you to be mad at Bethanny as long as she was begging for your fogiveness, but as soon as the tables were turned and she finally said she was done you start feeling sorry for yourself and saying you don't know how it got this bad. It never would have started if you didn't overreact about a stupid message. If someone is a true friend you don't let a message like that ruin your friendship, and when you got that message you should have called her and talked it out. THATS WHAT A TRUE FRIEND DOES!! I just hope you actually learn from this season and seeing your behavior and don't just dismiss your behavior on your blogs as you have done. AND STOP GOSSIPING!!! P.S. When did Luann become your bodyguard? Hope you are paying her well...
Love this show the editing is fabulous they really have made you a changed woman. Last you were a mother,business woman sister daughter and good friend of Bethany. Now you are everyone friend then your not then you are, what do you think of the editing? I have my favorite, what's yours
"The truth is, I was mad that Bethenny only decided to talk to me on camera. After my initial shock, I asked Bethenny if we could talk privately OFF CAMERA in the bedroom. That was my test. "
Why do you feel an obligation to test people?
The Kelly hand test comes to mind. What biz of yours? Why make an issue of it? Did you think you were the only one to notice the length of her dress? Why take it upon yourself to approve or disapprove of her attire? Who ARE you?
Frankly, seems to me you feel the need to comment just as you have the need to breathe - and everyone will hang on your every (ever present) word.
How can you be this old and this dumb?
Jill, like so many others, I used to like you (still do) but was quite disappointed in how mean you were to Bethany..over what..a comment "get a hobby?" My best friend and I say stupid things to each other once in awhile..but, WE get over it and move on. Remember, that you fail and others will too. Keep trying with Bethany, I hope she will soften. Don't listen to Luann too much..she doesn't have your best interest at heart.. love the show
I realze you may have felt ambushed but you had no problem playing a private message from bethany over and over to everyone on cam.I think maybe it was a little tit for tat. As for playing the puppet you have no problem when things are going your way and you are belittling anyone else. I still think you were one of my favs in the first few season and that hopefully editing is making you out to be meaner then you are.I hope that you revert to the old jill we all loved.You signed up for the reality show so you are gonna have to take the good with the bad.This show has skyrocketed you to the top and now people know who you are and they get to see all the times you win so you cant expect others to say oh your gonna apoligize but only off cam thats fine. So many of the housewives say things in the confessionals that are contradictory to what they say to the people on the show. I would probably have wanted a camera present for proof also. hopefully you and bethany at least are able to become civil again if not friends. ITs sad because it seemed at least from the show that you guys were good friends
Sorry Jill, I think that your refusal to accept Bethany's several tries to make up and telling her "I'm Done" more than three times was just awful. I used to like you, but your need for gossip and always being right just turned me off. I hope Bethany has a wonderfully happy life without your nastiness in it. I also hope you learn to be nicer and have less need for being right all the time and gossip.
Jill...I looked you up...you're a Sag like me. I know that friendship is an important part of life. I feel you are doing a disservice to both you and Bethenny. You can't throw people away...and more importantly you can't talk about people the way you do. I thought you were so cute...but your words are so ugly. You do messed up stuff and actually expect better from people. We Sag people are self-centered even though we are not selfish. It was obvious you didn't think about Bethenny or yourself when you thought you couldn't be her friend. Please do some self reflection...I know you will see how wrong you were.
Jill I used to love you...what happen? It's like you lost your morals when you lost your friendship with Bethany. Well at least there is one less toxic friend out of the way...that being you.
Jill- I still say that Bethenny should have come to you, apologized and stepped up OFF camera. Alex's behavior was disgraceful. She had NO business being in the middle of it. Bethenny and Alex are truly the one's in high school. They behaved just like my high school students! I am so sorry you were ambushed and treated the way you were. Kelly blows with the wind- no real loyalties and LuAnn seems to not have many either...making nice with Bethenny? You need to be with friends who are loyal and stand beside you. Look beyond these people. Ironically Ramona has turned out to be a much more upstanding person who doesn't want or need all the nastiness of Betheny and Alex. We all love you Jill!
The first time I saw this show I thought, I really like this lady. This year has been different. You have really acted like a spoiled brat. I'm shocked at how you acted towards Bethany. Luann is hanging on to you for dear life and you are loving it. I know there is a lot that the camera doesn't show but it seems like you want to be the center of attention or you don't have time for it. I love how you started crying after Alex delivered the message from Bethany and saying you have never done anything to Alex. OMG you have said everything about her, made fun of her, her husband and their children. It's a shame because I thought you had more class than that.
I do not think you act like a victim. I think you act like a survivor and a woman of strength whose vulnerabilities were exposed as your husband battled cancer. People often mistake fear (primary feeling) for anger (secondary feeling). Your being hurt by Bethenny not being a support person in your time of need was not only valid, but understandable. I know that it is only possible to be this upset by behaviors of someone you really care about. I adore both you and Bethenny, and although this was a real test of a true friendship, I think that if Luanne and Alex stayed out of it then healing would have been possible sooner for both you and Bethenny. I have 5 children and have not always been a great friend because their success is my priority, but I have learned to stop and listen and change after saying I am sorry for my neglect when a friend who was "my rock" for so many years needed me. I almost blew it, but after 20 years she gave me another chance and we are closer than ever. You may end up resenting the fake people who are taking advantage of your rift with a real friend. What the countess and aging model are doing wrong is not just listening until you work through your pain. I am truly happy for you and your family that things worked out with the cancer. What many fans are not seeing is that you had to be stong for your daughter and husband, so your pain and fear could not be addressed until everything was safe... I hope that with all of your "sorrys", you save one for yourself because you deserve a break! God bless you and yours! I admire you.
Jill, this year when you go to synagouge for Yom Kippur you will have alot to atone for due to your behaviour this season. I realize that the show sensationalizes things to make it more interesting, but your toxic relationship with Luann has shown a side of you that says "I can do anything I want" and not realize the consequences of your actions until other people point it out to you. As smart as you are, how could you have perceived that your actions were proper.
Be on the Luann alert. She is toxic. Bethanny was a good friend to you. Get back to who you were in the previous episodes... you and Luann come off ugly together...
I think you say sorry and mea culpa frequently but your actions do not seem to reflect your words. You were appalled at Ramona's thoughtless, rude comments at your Kodak event. Then you supposedly went to her party to show her that you are the bigger, better person -- to lead by example. Instead, you made mean, nasty digs about her product, the food, and anything else that came into your sightline. You have latched onto Luann so that you can both affirm to each other how wonderful you are and how awful everyone else is. I think under all the tv hullabaloo that you are decent, loving person. Yet you have let yourself get caught up in being "right", playing to the cameras, and have forgotten to let kindness, forgiveness and love rule your actions.
I know that you have a strong Jewish heritage. I have to say that I deeply repect the traditions and Godly heritage the Jewish people have. I have to say that I'm sincerely disappointed when I watched the episode when you have a fortune teller visit you in your home. In the old testament Saul went to a fortune teller and not only did he lose his Kingdom he winds up in Hell. You have so much to be thankful for. Did you ever wonder who the fortune teller is getting her information from? I assure you it is not from God. A fortune teller can tell you your past but only God holds someone's future. I really believe if you put God first in your life you will find the inner peace your looking for. At the end of the day you can't take it with you and we all have to stand before God and give an account for our life. I have to say.... I know that it's not how you start out that counts its how you finish the race. I'm praying for you!
Jill this thing with you and Bethany went too far this seasons. It's clear that both of you loved each other. You should not have let any one of the other housewives come inbetween that friendship. If you really truly valued her friendship, you should have confronted her about the message from the moment got it and told her in a nice way, how the message hurt your feelings instead of allowing it to feaster for months and by sharing it with everyone you knew. Bethany did reach out to you to make things right, but you rebuffed her and you wonder how it got to this? Is never too late to try to salvage a friendship, especially if it might alot to you. Send her a letter (not an e-mail) telling her how much you miss your friendship and ask for forgiveness for anything you may have done and I hope in turn, Bethany will also apologize for anything that he did.
Jill- I just wanted to drop a note to say that I'm so happy that Bethenny seems to have finally gotten the self-esteem and confidence to realize that you only loved her when a) She was needy and loney (just like Luann) and b) that you only are friends with people who you think will never eclipse you. If someone had treated your daughter like you treated Bethenny (speaker phone was LOW) you'd see yourself differently. Good luck. Love your mother.
Jill, just a couple of things, every single thing Betheny did, you did first. And as for talking on camera as opposed to in private, put yourself in her place. Based on all the garbage, I would never in life have a private conversation with you, you put so many twists and turns and as Alex says, its a game. You are a martyr and well, want to come out smelling like a rose. I would have reliable witnesses, camera's too. And not the "countess". She seems to try to have the same maneuvers as you. Geez, the two of you are in la la land....You sat right there an watched Bethenny beg you to listen and sobbed and you were such a cold b..... You reap what you sew baby!!!!
I do hope to see a more loving Jill. I hope this has just been for ratings and was not the real "you" because it is not pretty. Good luck.
You make comment you don't know who Bethany is because she announced through a note she is pregnant but WHO have you become? KARMA Jill! You are getting what you have given. Look in the mirror.
jill! jill! jill! c'mon! that whole if i don't like her you can't like her either is so 6th grade! yes beth was your lil pet but guess what she graduated...u need to too! loved u last season not so much this season.
Wow.... I cant believe how much you have changed this season I really liked you but I think you have gone way to far this times!!!
I thought this post was most gracious; esp. your ability to say "maybe I need a new hobby" as that was a phrase that had hurt you. Good Luck!!
Sorry, but some people actually say what they mean. When Bethenny said it's done, that's what she actually meant. She's not holding a grudge. She's just let you go. Thinking about you is just an emotional mess now and not worth going back into at this point. After that, you are recognized as the person you are but not as a friend, because you aren't. Straight no Chase, you are not a friend and can't be honored in that way anymore.
Jill, I know your pain quite well...my best friend, who I used to talk to all the time and our boys have grown up together, has kind of drifted away...her life has been caught up in her son's activities, which led her to other groups of people that I do not interact with...real friendship is hard to find...Betheny got caught up in her life and they way she handled it with you was wrong...you were hurt and reacted accordingly...if it was a true friendship, then it will come back...stay true to yourself...