Mario Singer

Mario responds to negative comments he's received from viewers.

on Apr 22, 20090

 

Now that I got all that off my chest, last night’s show proved to be relatively free of drama except for Kelly’s being very late to her own party. And what was that cash bar about? Ramona and I had also been invited to attend but our good friends had a Halloween party way uptown and it would have been difficult to go to both parties, especially with the traffic that is in the city on that night. Seems like we made the right decision as the party we went to was terrific with amazing décor, wonderful food and an OPEN BAR! Bobby and Jill also were invited and they finally arrived after wasting their time going downtown to Kelly’s no show affair. I loved their costumes and Bobby looked great as Napoleon. Now if he could only be more authoritative with Jill. If you were wondering, I was dressed as a buccaneer.

OK, now for my humor. I hope you enjoy this and I know most of you are women so please do not write that I am a chauvinist. Please pass it on to your boyfriends or husbands. I’m sure they will get a kick out of it.

WHY MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER

Nicknames:
If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.

If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four Eyes.

Eating Out:
When the bill arrives, the guys will each throw in $20, even though it’s only for $32.00. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.

When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

Money:
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A women will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need but it’s on sale.

Bathrooms:
A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor a bar of soap and a towel.

The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 350. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

Arguments:
A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

Future:
A successful man is one who makes more money that his wife can spend. (Bring any cast member to mind?)

A successful woman is one who can find such a man. (Bring any cast member to mind?) Hint: they are married to each other.

Marriage:
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, but she does.

Natural:
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

Offspring:
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about the doctor appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hope and dreams.

A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

Thought For the Day:
A married man should forget his mistakes. There is no use in two people remembering the same thing!

All the best.
Mario

315 comments
Chico Housewife
Chico Housewife

Hey Player, Come on! The roving eye makes you look so bad and desperate. No matter what your wife says,that hurts.Your arguement with Jill wasn't as bad as everyone says on the blogs, but if that were me you spoke to like that, my husband would have beat your butt right there.

Viewer
Viewer

Funny. Your a funny guy. thanks for the post

Viewer
Viewer

Mario, God Bless you for loving your wife with all her faults, and seeing the warmth and strength she offers your family. Be on her side, right or wrong: the three of you are a family and must support one another. Stay married, raise your daughter, and never feel compelled to defend your faith. Particularly those attacks which , not surprisingly, come from godless secularists who worship nothing but money and celebrity.

Keep your family a safehaven and protect them. There are people who are rooting for you and Ramona and Avery simply because you represent a traditional family model that is becoming extinct.

Keep the True Faith alive! Stay married!

Viewer
Viewer

Mario,you are the the best..Ramona is thinker bell I love her.. Jill is ok Kelly I don't care for her..she is a wanna be and drama queen, rude noxious and have not self-respect Alex the smart cookie of the group, Simon I like him the happy go lucky type.. LuAnn jeje she need a book of etiquette herself.. Beth you're my girl..go right on NY is all yours..Honesty you are up here and kelly down here..kelly is a deceptive woman...You Beth are a gracious person and has the ability you are a person with experience and accomplishment and a very courteous girll..keep the good faith with all things

Viewer
Viewer

I loved you last season!!! You were the voice of reason, had nice manners, were a real gentleman. Did you lose your Meds.??? You are now all over the place and not in a nice way.

Viewer
Viewer

I love your blogs! You speak the truth! JILLZARIN is the most obnoxious yenta on the planet. I've had the misfortune of meeting her at some events. Ewwwww! Very low class and the biggest wanna be! Bobby's money doesn't buy her class. I'm so sick of the infomercials for ZARIN FABRICS! I'm glad you put her in her place and told her that her 15 minutes are going to her head! All the best to you!

kathymrs
kathymrs

Mario; you are a refreshing part of the show. And valuable to the storylines. I think that Ramona is just proud to have such a handsom husband. Try to ignore the mean spiritedness of the other writers. I think jealousy is involved. They could only wish of having the lifestyle you and Jill have. It appears that you love your wife very much and that's good. America needs to see happy couples. I know that I do. I thought mine was the only one.

Viewer
Viewer

Mario, you think others are self-obsessed, yet I have rarely seen a man so haughty, arrogant and in love with themselves as you. Try doing something meaningful with your life besides making money off trinkets to lessen the beauty of some peoples spiritual beliefs, and hitting a little ball around.

Melinda
Melinda

I really think you should go back and watch the episodes of yourself exploding on Jill about the tennis match. She obviously was not feeling comfortable about doing it, why not just let it go? I think if your honest with yourself you will see how relentless you were. I was actually embarrased for you, it was hard to watch. Jill was trying to laugh it off but you wouldn't stop, like a pitbull with his prey. Then you went from her to Alex & Simon, who were so unsuspecting of your rant. Holy cow, you really need to check yourself. I'm really trying not to be mean, maybe this will help you grow as a person and teach you how to take things a little easier. Lighten up, it's not good for your health to be that angry over very little things in life. Good luck Mario.

Elizabeth
Elizabeth

So tell us women...why are men much happier? I probably will agree, since I am a woman, and although I do enjoy women's company--there is so much fuss about the most minuscule details...they make mountains out of molehills! LOL

Viewer
Viewer

Mario...you are a fantastic blogger ! Your commical and very "insightful" comments are right on target(especially when referring to Jill ) Love you and your adorable wife Ramona's great sense of humor, style and parenting skills....Ps.. you guys could give Simon and Alex some serious lessons on raising there 2 little brats. Keep up the blogging

Viewer
Viewer

Hey Mario... You and Ramona are the only "normal' couple on the show. I have great respect for both of you. I think you are referring to Jill and Bawbee....in your joke section. Jill is so full of herself and her husband's money.....you're the only one on the show that has the guts to give her a taste of her own medicine. You and Ramona were smart enough not to attend Kelly's stupid party...she is a joke....I hope she does not return next season...UGH Keep up the humor......

dolores
dolores

I think you're the best Mario. You are a serious tennis player and just wanted to play a game. Jill had to act like it was the US Open or Wimbledon. Everyone needs to calm down. I like you and Ramona. Your daughter Avery is very nice and beautiful. Ramona can be impulsive and blurt out things without thinking them through. I do the same thing. She sure picked a good husband though. Keep blogging Mario, drive "Team Jill" crazy..... ha ha

lvk
lvk

love you,mario. That viewer needs to shut up. You're a good guy.

Suzi
Suzi

Are you kidding me?? Ragmona throws hissy fits all last season about Simon's participation in the show, and now you're prominently featured this season, right down to blogging.

You did yourself a disservice. Last year you seemed like a likeable guy. This year you have demolished that impression and shown yourself to be a hyper-aggressive, snide jerk.

You and Ragmona deserve each other.

Ida
Ida

Maybe they can cancell the Sopranos, ooops I mean RHofNJ and put the dou**ebag husbands of NYC on instead I like the ring of DH of NYC better. Seems there are plenty there wanting to get face time.

Kristy
Kristy

It cracks me up at how easily you & Ramona are flustered by Simon. Clearly you are insecure around him. The true you is being see this season and you are MEAN!!

Viewer
Viewer

Please stop commenting. I don't care what you think.

Viewer
Viewer

Mario, what kind of man gossips about decorating? You're creepy. All the pro-Mario bloggers are really Ramona feverishy typing away! What is with you two? Jill is Classy. You? Just Assy.

Justification
Justification

Mario you are in an identity crisis! You cannot justify what you have blogged or how you appeared on the show. The Romario couple is giving The Desperate Housewife role a whole new classification! Your charade on the show and in your blogs is repulsive. You are not funny ….arrogant bully yes!

leanne
leanne

Mario when you continue to bash your fellow cast it makes you and your wife look very insecure. Focus on your own business. Jealousy is never attractive.

Viewer
Viewer

LMAO... okay you have some great points! I especially love your theory on arguments...

LRF
LRF

Please, Mario and to anyone who wasted time reading "Why Men Are Happier"--anyone who works in Corporate America has had that same bit sent to them a million times over as a forward from a friend or co-worker--can you say "plagiarize"---I cannot believe you are taking credit for such---anyway, moving forward, you were at least likeable in Season 1--kinda cute, nice to your wife and kid etc....Season 2? Forget it--such a turn off you have become--back in the day you'd be called "a skirt" and that is just how you are behaving...grow up.

Missy
Missy

You always seemed to have the best manners and the kindest heart. But for the life of me I dont understand why you would publicly berate Jill over a stupid tennis game, Constantly in public. Check with Avery she seems to be more mature than you or Ramona.

brush
brush

Mario, Being serious, do you use a roll brush when you blow dry you hair? What kind of gel and spray do you use? I am a moose man myself with a tad bit of light hold spray, 10 minutes and my hair is taller than Taylor Dayne's in the music video "Tell it to my heart".

Shannon
Shannon

Why do you even have a blog. Is your life so pitaful that you have to piggyback the things that your wife is involved in. Really this is about the women and everytime you have something to say on the show I have to change the channel because you ruin the whole show and what it is suppose to be.

Viewer
Viewer

Maybe people aren't laughing at Mario's jokes b/c they aren't funny!!

His comments make him look desperate and pathetic. Who cares how Jill did her apt? As long as she, Bobby, and Ally like it, who cares?? As for how much money she spends?? Again, she earns/has it and it's her choice to do whatever she wants to with it. That's what makes the economy go around. Your wife knows something about it, she dropped several thousand on some shoes.

As for the advice to Bobby on how to control his wife, maybe you should reign your own back in first before advising someone else on doing the same.

And again, why do you care??? You seem to care about a lot of things that a) don't concern/affect you and b) it's none of your business!!!

Hope you are on less in Season 3.

Viewer
Viewer

Mario,

Last year I loved you but this season, after hearing you speak more and seeing how you think, I think you are a moron. Goes to show that you can't judge a book by it's cover. You went from very handsome to very not handsome. Bobby, who at first impression is not that good looking now is adorable because he has a charming, lovely personality. I know this will not make a difference to you, what people say, because you are too into yourself to care. You and Ramona are a real pair! You deserve each other.

Viewer
Viewer

Why do you fight with WOMEN? That is not very MANly of you. You should let the women handle their own show and you should just stay out of it. It's not called the real husbands of New York!

Viewer
Viewer

Stop Blogging!!!

Viewer
Viewer

Don't go away mad...just go away

Viewer
Viewer

Why are you blogging?

For all your rudeness toward Simon it seems you are trying to be just like him and become another housewife.

Mama
Mama

Why are you so JEALOUS of Jill & Bobby?! You really are quite obnoxious and full of youself like your wife.

Gypsy
Gypsy

Dear Marry-OH;

You are truly clueless to keep blogging to the ladies. Your joke at the end is nothing we haven't read before and is not relevant to the subject at hand. Go back to minding your own business and leave your wife's friends alone, for a change. Your continued harping about the idiotic tennis match just makes you look very small.

Viewer
Viewer

Talk about someone whose 15 minutes of fame needs to be over and has gone to their heads....enough already. Why is it you are blogging? This is the HOUSEWIVES. You want a reality show? Go get your own. You are just starving for attention and camera time.

Viewer
Viewer

Talk about your 5 minutes of fame......I used to think you were manly...now after the dog poop scene...what a woosie....pretentious to say the least.....stay in the backgrounhd..you come off much better there. Bet this show helped your business as well...don't try to fool anyone as to why you did the show.I'm not saying its awrong...but youre now fooling anyone

Viewer
Viewer

Mario, Keep on blogging. You goof on everyone and they (Jill) go nuts over it. Love it.

Viewer
Viewer

Mario, You are wonderful! Such a breath of fresh air you and Romona bring to the show. Your tennis game is top notch and Jill should have never taken you and Romona on. Silex drives me crazy too. Thank you from your villanova frat brothers.

Viewer
Viewer

My husband loves your sunglasses.

Viewer
Viewer

You sure are a cutie, although watching you 'catfight' with a woman reminded me how you and Ramona are really meant to be together.

Viewer
Viewer

Angela, I don't think Ramona is jealous of Jill. are you kdding me? I think they are just competitive of each other but Jill has a better common sense when she answers certain questions. I think it should be Jill who would be jealous of Ramona. with a husband like Bobby? I would definitely be envious of someone who has a husband like Mario! And Ramona and Mario looks like they are weathy enough not to be envious of anyone else.

Jill works for her husbands store. Ramona has established her own businesses (frankly that's very differnt, common!) and is just promoting Mario's busines in addition since she is coming out as the Real Housewife.

I frankly think Mario is great. Love their daughter and how well they have brought her up. Even their dog behaves better.

Angela
Angela

Mario, I think your daughter is absolutely beautiful! I really mean that. Just so you know I think everyone gets your humor but you are not funny. Stop attacking Jill. If she married a man that makes more money then she can spend then kudos to her. Why does it matter to you? Jealous maybe? I know your wife is jealous of her but I didn't know there were men like that. However, being married to Ramona, could make a man a total screwball but then again you probably already was one for marrying her in the first place.

Chris
Chris

The fact that someone must form a team shows how desperate they are to win at any cost. What is this, grade school?

I think you have a great sense of humor and find it funny that Jill gets so bothered and doesn't know how to laugh and have a little fun. A person with a sense of humor would have fun with a little banter.

I hope you keep blogging. I'm not sure why Jill thinks she speaks for all the fans, maybe the show has gone to her head and she actually thinks she in the new Queen!

Viewer
Viewer

I love you and Ramona. The only time Ramona is in negative light is when she and Jill gets competitive and Jill comes off a winner because she is better at filtering out her words then Ramona is. (also Ramona gets too excited when she talks- her eyes)

Then you come to her rescue and is not any better. You guys just don't know how to play the media and the viewers and gets all the negative comments.

I suggest that you guys stop commenting on Jill or Silex and just keep on showing your fabulous and loving family life. Whenever you guys have issues with someone you just don't handle the situation well by keep on talking about it (like Kelly) and I don't think that's a true reflection of you guys.

However, I love how you and Ramona are to each other. Including Avry. wonderful family. Nothing fake about you guys unlike that grose Silex couple.

I love your jewelry line especialy the ones Ramona picked. Am comtemplating on buying one for my sister.

Cheers,

Maura
Maura

Mario, I can't understand why you would berate Jill over and over at a party about a game of tennis. My God, is your life that meaningless and unfulfilled that you treat someone that way over a dumb game. It shows you are very insecure. Also, Jill took the high road and basically tried to appease you and ignore you. As far as Jill spending Bobby's money: newsflash: they are married. It is both of their money. AND, nobody works harder and gives better customer service in that store than Jill. You need to take back that foolish remark!

Viewer from Georgia
Viewer from Georgia

Next time Mario, be sure to wear peppermint lotion on your feet, that way next time it will not taste so bad! LOL, I do love to hate you and what's her name.

Viewer
Viewer

I personally think Silex is really fake, so I posted that in their blog (maybe 6 or 7 times because it never shows up). But seriously, NONE of it got posted, which means all the negative posts on their site get filtered.

Whereas you just let all the negative and the positive get posted on yours. I like you guys because you guys are REAL.

Love you and your family!

Queen of Mean
Queen of Mean

Mario, are you trying to take away Ramona's crown? Your blogs and appearances on the show demonstrate jealousy issues. You ssem to think attcking everyone on the show except Ramona makes you some kind of hero...NOT. This displays yours and Ramona's insecurities. Play nice with Simon and maybe you can get your own show. You're not a Housewife!

Johnny
Johnny

Mario... please stop this... its like you are trying to dig yourself out of a hole while trying to be funny... and it is coming off just wrong! You now have little room to criticize Simon... and really, your views on being a man just make me sick...

Put your energy into playing tennis so you can beat Jill and whatever pro she can muster... not into cutting her down on here... or commenting on a break-up that is just in the press...

Viewer
Viewer

Great list Mario! I got your humor from the start :)