Ramona Singer

Ramona apologizes for her hurtful words to Bethenny, and explains why she set up the meet between B and Jill.

on Apr 8, 20100

 

I have to tell you this was a difficult blog to write and I have been putting it off. So here it goes. Watching the teasers, I was so upset by what I said to Bethenny on the Brooklyn Bridge. I told her she didn't have any friends and that she would probably screw up her relationship with Jason, and that was hitting below the belt. I was just not nice, and I have to own up to it. Even though our prior conversation was heated and we were exchanging barbs, the bottom line is she came to me with a situation that was troubling her tremendously, and she needed sympathy and comfort.

The good news is I apologized to Bethenny at a later time and we got past it. I went to her fabulous wedding to Jason and we are now genuine friends. What is a friend? A friend is someone who is there for you through the good, the bad, and the ugly, someone who allows you to express yourself, and someone who forgives you for your mistakes. No one is perfect. I know I still have a lot of growing to do, but I am trying. I am a very emotional person. There is nothing wishy-washy about me - I am very passionate about what I do, the way I feel and even in the way I express myself. There's no grey area with me - only black and white. I am an extremist. I can argue hard and make up harder. I ignite quickly, but when a disagreement is over, it's over. I do not hold grudges - life is too short. While walking the bridge with Bethenny I finally took in the distress and pain she was feeling. I've never seen her so upset and edgy. I was genuinely concerned, which is why I came up with a plan for Bethenny to come over when Jill was at my home visiting. No one could hang up the phone or run out the door so quickly. I was hoping they would make peace with each other, maybe even make up and be good friends again or at least try to start rebuilding what ever went wrong in their friendship. I really wanted to help them repair their relationship. I knew the situation was causing them both pain, and they needed to make amends. Never in a million years did I think they would leave my home without coming to a resolution.

I don't think LuAnn was a positive presence during Jill and Bethenny's discussion. Looking back, I should of left the apartment with LuAnn. I really feel LuAnn forced Jill and Bethenny to go their separate ways and prevented them from finishing their conversation.

 

485 comments
Dilly
Dilly

Home run! Great slgugnig with that answer!

Gino
Gino

Ramona, I have been watching RHONYC and to be honest with you, you were not my favorite housewife. But that all changed in Season 3. Watching you with Bethenny and Jill just showed me what a GREAT PERSON you really are. Everyone has their quirky sides. But in the final episodes of season 3... YOU SHINED and shined bright. Wow! Not only are you smart and gorgeous, but you have a HEART OF GOLD. Sincerely Gino

lena lindell
lena lindell

You have a lot of Nerve the way you behave...have you seen yourself...I think you just want to be involved in the drama at any cost....it's sad you can't control yourself and mind your own business...

Dawn Gaglia
Dawn Gaglia

Ramona:

I think you have the biggest heart in the world and want to help everyone. I have the same problem with my mouth but have learned to try to think before I speak but mostly, I figured out that everyone doesn't care what I think all the time. I give my opinion when asked...for the most part.

LuAnn is a trouble maker, Kelly is a moron and irritates me with the "Hiiii" and "YAY". Drives me bonkers. Jill is a hypocrite and I hope Bethenny can move on without Jill's toxic friendship in her life.

Be true to yourself and watch Sonya. She's a bit of a snake as well. Gossiping about you behind your back wasn't cool.

Guard your heart.

terry hatchett
terry hatchett

WOW! I'm your age and have two children. When they were young they would say what ever came to their mind if they saw a fat person they would say you are fat. My job as a parent was to teach them manners and educate them. They are both college educated and my son has his masters. One of the differences between children and adults is we have learned to have "self control". Some how you never learned to have any what ever pops in your head you say with no reguard to how it will affect the other person. When you realize latter how it made you look you will apologizes. It is to late. You need to THINK before you speak. Your new hair cut didn't help you get any self control.

kathi
kathi

ramona you are a good person.ty for trying to get jill and bethanny to resolve.the only way that will happen is if jill gets over herself,and luann,is out of the pix.your good will and friendly manner towards alex and simon is awesome...

Florida Mama
Florida Mama

Ramona- I'm going to try to teach you a saying I have always reminded my children. Words are like toothpaste Once they are out of your mouth -They aren't going back in.

here's to u
here's to u

I like u this season....getting along w/Simon....but please think before u speak.

pate
pate

I used to love this show and now for some strange reason I find myself watching it and cringing. IT's like a car crash I can't keep my eyes averted from. Ramona...it's truly sad that every episode you just trash your friends then apologize then go back to the same old. Very sad. You talk about this whole renewing, how about renewing how you are treating others. How you have spoken to people on this show. If Bethany, Jill, and Kelly and Alex have all been hurt.... and then you just act that it's just the way you are... maybe you should take a second look at that renewal you are doing and take it seriously.

Larry from Pa.
Larry from Pa.

Ramona, Trying to get two past BFF back together shows the caring person you are. Next time , make sure LuAnn is out of country...

Betterlate22
Betterlate22

Hi Ramona, love the fashion show...those eyes were magnificant!!

Judy from PA
Judy from PA

I agree with Ramona. I also think Luann purposely got Jill out of there quickly so Jill and Bethenny couldn't make peace with one another. Bobby told Jill that you can't just throw friends away. I think Jill should stop letting Luann make decisions for her. Everyone makes mistakes including Jill. She is not perfect. Give Bethenny a chance.

upstate fan
upstate fan

I am happy for your success with the jewelry line and your marriage! I have 1 question though..do you ever stop and think about what you are saying before you say it? Some things, once said, can never be taken back, apologized away, or forgotten. There is a difference between being honest and being blunt and hurtful..keep it in mind.

June B
June B

Ramona... don't let that jealous self centered Jill and Luanne bring you down. They wish they could be like you but that is impossible. Your a beautiful, kind, fun loving women and they put you down because they wish they were you. We love you and remember... keep your head up and ignore those sad lonely losers!!!

kiki28
kiki28

Ramona, You need to go back to school, get educated and learn some social graces. You have the open mouth insert foot syndrome. What amazes me is that the husbands are attracted to women with such rough edges. From watching these shows I do not want to live in NY, Ca., Ga., and anywhere near the mafia women of NJ. What the heck? The common demoninator is self-serving, rude, and greedy "B's". What's to really like? You give the word woman a bad name. I'm so happy Bethany found a great guy like Jason. And...you guys can't stand it or be happy for her you want to ruin her whole experience. For you to be so mean and tell her she'd probably screw her relationship up with Jason is selish and unforgivable. You're literally stupid and need a therapist ASAP.

AM
AM

Ramona - Kudos to you for self-reflecting, and realizing you could've handled the situation with Bethany with a more supportive approach. I also commend you for being a FRIEND by trying to re-connect Bethany and Jill at your home. Jill over reacted, and should've appreciated your good intentions. LuAnn was ridiculous. With that said, my unsolicited opinion is you would truly benefit from being more cognizant of what you say. Most people stuggle with their tone, and how they convey their sentiments. Although I appreciate candor, your bluntness certainly takes the cake. Perhaps talking "with" people instead of talking "at" them would go a long way. All the best to you and your hubby for 16 years of partnership :) P.S. Please tell Jill to lighten up!! Life is too short to hold on to negativity.

A big fan
A big fan

Keep up the great job, Ramona! We enjoy watching you - I was just devastated when you said those mean things to Bethenny - but I'm proud of you for recognizing it was hurtful and trying to make it right. Bethenny says mean things too, but there is no malice there for either of you, it's just entertaining usually. I can't wait to see your new jewelry either! I love what you showed last month.

Viewer from MD
Viewer from MD

I applaud you Ramona for trying to be the peacemaker. I agree you should have taken LuAnn for a walk. She thinks everything is about her. Why would she ask Bethenny are you here to see me when you had already stated she was there to speak with Jill? She/LuAnn is going through her own issues and may need a friend, but who is she to come between another friendship????????

jennceee
jennceee

Ramona, every time I watch when you walk with Bethany & tell her she has no friends, my blood boils! Bethany sure is a trooper for continuing the walk because I would've told you to bug off and turned around & walked the other way. Just incredibly amazing...

Pandora
Pandora

I hate to admit that I really like viewing Bravo's Housewives: Atlanta, New York & New Jersey. Shame!! When you ladies judge people by the area they live,i.e. Simon & Alex, you really lower your class status. I am a true Southern Bell, my status could put New York and Atlanta Housewives to shame, my linage goes as far back as the Civil War, my family plantation is one of the oldest in the South. My Paternal Grandfather and Grandmother came via Elis Island from Greece. You, Ladies, need to stop and think what you say to others.

Brown eyed one in fl
Brown eyed one in fl

You & alex are really the heros this year! Good for both of you for not stooping down to Jill & louannes level! hey both have got to go ! hope bravo & the other housewives read ALL these comments its pretty much unanimus!!!!

DDsgal
DDsgal

Ramona - I think what you said to Betheny was spot on, it just wasn't delivered the right way. It's really great that you owned up to hurting her feelings. As far as getting the two gals together - you're a good friend to both of them for realizing they need each other and shame on LuAnn for not letting them have time together. I like others here believe she's afraid of losing Jill's friendship - Jill has a big enough heart for more than one friend.

Juliette Michia
Juliette Michia

Hi Ramona, I love your jewelry and would love to know where I can buy it. I think your necklaces are fabulous, especially the diamonds by the yard one. Are they costume jewelry because I could not afford the real thing. I have been looking everywhere on line for your pieces but to know avail. Please let me know. Thank you, Juliette

Marlene Emmett
Marlene Emmett

Ramona: I'm like you~ I tell it like I see it~and if my friends don't like it well too bad.

Why can't the wives just be happy for Bethanny she's having her first child~and has just gotten married~cut her some slack.

I like all of the wives~But really want to see Jill and Bethanny make up.

and your hair looks great!

MariaR
MariaR

If your lips would keep form slips Five things observe with care Of whom you speak, to whom you speak And how, and when, and where.

Ramona,True friends listen before they speak and dont use your words to cut people.

I don't think any of the women on the show are true friends and if they are; you certainly dont need enemies.

rj2boo87
rj2boo87

Ramona, Yes, you are very much a girl that "lays it on the line". You speak your mind. Next time you may want to slow down a bit...sometimes words cannot be taken back. Words hurt. Making up after words are said will get harder and harder for the other person to forgive...

JJWAG
JJWAG

Dearest Ramona, I saw the you when you listened to Bethenney respond. You are really a great friend to her and have been for many years. I have been watching since the beginning!!! You always helped give pointers in so many ways, and you mean well and that should have been obvious to any viewer. I've walked over the Brooklyn Bridge with loved ones and you must really have cared alot to walk and talk with B. I commend your bravery first and foremost!!! JJWAG

ViewerT
ViewerT

Ramona,

I love that you speak your mind and I don't think that you are curt. I agree that Lu Ann does not want Jill and Bethany to repair their friendship, because it means that Lu Ann might lose her new BFF. Like you said last season "Jill likes the underdog" and unfortunately this season it is Lu Ann and she is to blind to realize that once she starts dating again then, Jill will do the same thing to her.

lorrp
lorrp

Ramona: Please remember that you have one mouth and TWO ears... you should filter what comes out of your mouth. You can be so hurtful and you seem unaware of the reactions you cause. Also, go easy on your drinking.... seems to make your mouth move faster and stupider too.... sigh....

Zuzu MS
Zuzu MS

Ramona, Last year you were me least favorite and this year you are my MOST FAVORITE!!

MR
MR

Ramona, You have to look at your self very closely and see what kind of pension you come out to be. Being hones is a good thing but there is a way, and you talk before you, think and that’s where you get your self in to trouble a lot of times. Yes, friends are to stay by you in the good and bad times but they can only for give so many times. As I said think before you talk, it really would help you.

tanaj
tanaj

Ramona, I like you. I love that you admitted that you were wrong and apologized to Bethenny for the things that you said. I also love that you hold everyone accountable for the things that they say and do and that you see through all of their b.s. Jill and Luann could take some lessons from you. I also love your jewelry!

bravotv1
bravotv1

How big of you Ramona. I'm happy you realized your mistake owned up to it and apologized. I agree with you LuAnn was definitely the problem. As I was watching the episode I was waiting for you to take her outside. She turned into a child pointing fingers and making Jill feel worse about the situation. Bethenny and Jill should have been left alone. I'm sure things would have gone differently. However, it happened the way it did for a reason. I am not a fan of LuAnn this season. She has turned into a real snot.

Viewer234234
Viewer234234

I don't care what anymore says, you're one of my favorite housewives. I like that you're yourself and will say what you feel at the moment. GO RAMONA!

zero milligram (o.m.g.)
zero milligram (o.m.g.)

lit' miss white rice, bless you for trying to be a true friend. you have known jill the longest and know how much she needs to be friends with bethenny. she has missed the wedding let's hope she doesn't miss the baby now. (o.m.g.) bless you and your white rice

normig
normig

Ramona--I agree w/ you 100%. I'm so glad you were able to write this blog after all. Good luck and many blessing to you!

Tory from Boston
Tory from Boston

Ramona, I think you were not in the wrong to want two of your bestfriends to reconcile. Any caring friend would want that. It gets annoying and hard when people keep having to dodge eachother because so & so doesnt like this one or that one. I think you speak your mind and alot of people are used to others sugar coating everything like everyone needs to be babied when they are talked to. I think you are refreshing and you keep people on there toes.

Capri54
Capri54

Ramona you offer some crazy love that makes not liking you impossible. It does the heart good doing the right thing, yes?

All in all I would rather you girls be fighting over men/fashion/money/etc... anything but each other!

shugah
shugah

I am so happy that you are Woman enough to see how mean that conversation with Bethanny was..

Maria Elena
Maria Elena

Ramona,

Good for you in trying to help bring two friends who obviously miss each other together again. Shame on LuAnn for interfering and breaking up THEIR discussion.

Deirdre D
Deirdre D

Ramona: I adore you! You are wonderful! Mario is awesome and so is Avery. You bring refreshing honesty and you don't have an agenda. Love, Love, Love you! Do an exercise video....It will be a success!

IDA
IDA

RAMONA, FIRST AND FORMOST I LOVE THE SHOW AND HAVE WATCHED SINCED THE BEGINNING. WHAT IS THE NAME OF THE OF YOUR FAVORITE DRINK? IS IT A WINE? I WOULD LOVE TO TRY IT. THANKS FOR YOUR RESPONCE

eroberts
eroberts

You did the right thing for your friends! you are concerned about them and its only natural to try and help! I thought it was funny though that Luann was more concerned about blaming you, and literally pointing the finger at you for the "ambush". She wasn't even happy or sad about what had happened, it just looked like she is trying to pit Jill against more people. But like I say to myself, just do what you can, the rest is up to them! Love you Ramona, I always love seeing what your up too!

sr
sr

Ramona, I admire that you like to speak your mind. Most of the time your choices in words are not the best. You can be very hurtful. But I also understand that you do not know how to express yourself in a matter that can come across kindly. But you are a woman that understands when she does wrong and will apologize. And that makes your a woman. I see that you are a good person and you try to be kind. In regards to your arrangement with B and Jill's meeting. I really thought you did a good job and that was very nice of you. So I wanted to say good job. And that is a true friend.

Dawnn
Dawnn

Romana, you drive me nuts sometimes but you did the right thing by trying to get B and Jill to make up.

Luanne was wrong to interfere.

That was the best description of friendship that I have even read!!

Whoahhh
Whoahhh

You can be seriously harsh at times. I've been watching the show for quite some time and you really would do well to get a filter for your words. Words hurt and can cut and even though you may apologize you cannot take them back and it can still affect someone's life. Speak the truth in love or don't say anything at all. I've heard you say such thoughtless things to so many people and then when they react or get upset you think they are crazy or overeacting. I may not know exactly what I'm talking about since I don't know you but I have seen how you talk to people and I would strongly suggest you really THINK before you speak from now on. I wish you well.

ebeech
ebeech

Ramona, you definatly do speak your mind and it isn't a bad thing. Its the way you come across. You act like your better then them with the way you say your critisism. But I def give you props for hooking bethany and jill up. They definatly need to work that out. DONT LET STUPID LUANNE TELL U OTHERWISE! YOU GO GIRL(;

Japan Fan
Japan Fan

Ramona,

Your words can be harsh, but a sincere apology goes a very long way, in my book. I am so impressed by your true desire and effort to grow as a person this season. I think you did absolutely the right thing in trying to set up that meeting between Bethany and Jill. One thing I'd like to point out though--there were a couple of instances this season where it really sounds like you're stirring things up behind the scenes. (Jill telling LuAnn that you'd told her that Kelly and Bethany were all "kissy-kissy" at the fashion meeting-is one example). That should be your next project to work on! All in all, you've really impressed me this season. :-)

BostonWife
BostonWife

Ramona,

I must admit that we are the same age. I experience some mood swings as you exhibit on the show. So, I can relate. Your comments to Bethenny on the Bridge went too far in tone. But, the content wasn't too far off. She has been a camera hog and overly Dramatic Queen B! Your idea to reunite J & B was well intended. However, you should have remembered how it flopped when Jill tried the same manuever with Bethenny and Kelly! Geez, B needs interventions often, huh? It would have been far better to inform Jill of the plan and when she was ready to handle it, the meeting could have occurred with better results. Did the Bravo producers force this exchange for dramatic display? 'Just wondering, since the show is looking more rehearsed and scripted than in previous seasons... Right now, the fun is gone from the show.

DonnaM.
DonnaM.

Ramona, it is better to be kind than snarky.