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Sorry for not blogging last week. Ryan had surgery and like most moms my energy was focused on him. He broke his foot three months ago and needed surgery, but he didn't have health insurance because he had just started a new job. Long story short, he broke his foot again and needed pins and screws. Get better Ryan.

So I can't believe next week we say good-bye to our favorite bitches. Seems like just yesterday we were so excited to tune in and watch New York's finest. There was lil' Simon in his Speedo and hairy nipples, Ramona with her crazy eyes and wild arms, Lady B with her one-liners and rocking bod, LuAnn letting everyone know she was The Countess, Kelly with a huge smile looking medicated and Jill trying to sell everything she can to make a Bravo buck. Funny how I wrote about Simon and NOT Alex....who's the housewife in that relationship?

So Alex and Simon need drapes, and what better place to go than Zarin Fabric? They bring their horribly behaved children, who rip through all the fabric, bounce on the furniture and run down the aisles. It personally drives me nuts to see children act like that - I don't know how Jill kept so calm. You know she wanted to knock their heads together. I have two boys and two girls and know it isn't always easy to keep them in line. But I have to say when I give my kids "the look" (which isn't that easy with this much Botox) they know to stop. Silex you need to show those kids who's boss!

Comments

73 Comments
06/12/2009 - 3:09pm
Andrea

Tamra !!
i love the OCHW! the blog was hilarious and tho i disagree with you on some comments you made it was still very funny.
I was watching the OC house wife's last night (lost footage) and i realized it was kinda messed up of you to bring up the whole thing with Gretchen's ex. I think it would of been a whole lot better to talk about somewhere else not in front of America, but whatever. That's what makes good t.v ;D

05/26/2009 - 4:59pm
Viewer

After watching the reunion show, I think Tamra and Vicki talk so badly about Gretchen and Lynne because they're jealous. Gretchen and Lynne are really fit. Tamra looks sunbaked! She's an old woman trying to hold her breasts up in a very expensive push-up bra. Vicki, oh goodness! She has an awful face. If Tamra is going to get her breasts worked on, I wish she would take Vicki along for a nose job and chin implant. They shouldn't comment about Gretchen being a gold digger or Lynne being dumb when they're both so mean and shallow.

05/18/2009 - 4:05pm
Lena

Tamra!

THANKS you for your wonderful blog! At the beginning of this season of RHNYC, you promised us a compilation of Bethenny's one-liner don't forget! I really look forward to reading it!!

Thanks!

05/17/2009 - 10:55am
Viewer

What's the deal Tam....no blog about the reunion show?? I'm so disappointed. Watching a season of NYC just makes me miss you OC gals even more!

05/15/2009 - 10:46pm
Kristy

Tamra, I LOVE your blog, you keep me in stitches, you are just too funny! Please keep writing them, I so enjoy being entertained by your view of the world, it's great! I love the RHNYC/AC/NJ, but my all time favorites are the RHOC. Just can't beat you guys, you're the best!

05/15/2009 - 2:42pm
Viewer

The kindest thing I can say about you is you are a POTTY MOUTH!! Get an education and learn something constructive.

05/15/2009 - 12:57pm
Viewer

The housewives of NJ,when she comments about her family being thick as thieves, I thought maybe Ill just watch Soprano re-runs.

05/14/2009 - 12:09pm
Viewer

what is chucky odor?

05/14/2009 - 10:05am
cjct

omg, tamra, I LOVE you! you are the only housewife who keeps it totally real and cracks me up at the same time. I agree with every point you make in your blog. love your comments about ramona -- she's one mean, but sad, girl. her insecurities are obvious to all -- she's mean and tacky to cover what's really going on behind those crazy eyes. sad for her but so funny for us! I love this show and like you, couldn't wait for the NJ premiere. it was more than I hoped for -- I love those ladies. they are real and entertaining -- just like you. I am so sick of that nyc crowd. and you're right about kelly -- what IS going on behind that glaze of hers? I don't get her at all either. so fake, but also insecure. how could someone so gorgeous be so unsure of herself? I love jill and bethenny, and even alex has her positives. at least she's honest, but such a stick up the booty!! keep the blog coming tamra. you make me laugh. lovin' housewives in connecticut....xo

05/14/2009 - 9:41am
GuiltyPleasure37

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEEEEEEEEEASE blog tonight after the show about the whole reunion special!! I cannot wait to see what you have to say about it all!! :)
p.s. Yes my life is that boring that I'm looking forward to someone I dont know blogging about other people I dont know. LOL! :)

05/12/2009 - 10:48am
Viewer

I was so disappointed in your treatment of Gretchen on your season ending tell all. Her life is none of your business good or bad and it was like watching kindergarten class of "oh i am going to tell on you" people do that out of jealousy which you definetly are of her. you no longer are the hottest house wife and and your ass should have been thrown out of the show for that behaviour. But like they say what goes around comes around and it will come to you some day for being so vindictive of another person.

05/11/2009 - 12:47pm
Lisa

Tamra, I could have sworn you would have commented on Simon's red skin tight pants!!!!!!

05/11/2009 - 11:33am
Viewer

Uh, where's your blog for last week??? I love your blogs and I'm pretty bored at work today so get on it... :)

05/07/2009 - 3:55pm
JB

Tamra,
This is the Tamra I missed during the RH OC season. Whether due to editing or just bad situations, you came across as really snide and bitter. I'm glad to have you back as your witty, smart ass self. Please keep blogging for the next Housewives spin off!

05/05/2009 - 6:25pm
Janet

Please stop taking Duzoxin! The first ingredient, Guarana Extract, is caffeine. Another ingredient, Citrus Aurantulum, has been linked to increased blood pressure and heart complications! No one should take something that makes their blood pressure go sky high, in addition to a huge jolt of caffeine, and then go exercise! That's not energy, that is a high from the stimulants. Please don't take it and please stop encouraging others.

05/05/2009 - 8:44am
Steph

I have to say, I thought you were pretty mean and superficial. However, I love reading your Blogs. I'm feeling everything you say. Seriously, I can't wait to see the RH of OC. I'm sure I'm going to get a good kick out of the NO Bull RH of NJ. Looking forward to reading your Blogs.

05/05/2009 - 2:44am
Allie

Tamra i LOVE you!! My favorite housewives are from Orange County and since i live in NJ, I can't wait until the real housewives of NJ airs. I have to say, you ARE the hottest housewife from orange county housewives! From a young persons perspective, you look great! I also love your blog, your hysterical. I hope Ryan feels better soon :)

I completely agree with your Kelly comment, i haven't liked her since she came on the show. Shes fake and her "baby" voice may fool the foreigner Max, but to everyone else, its ANNOYING! Shes such a joke

05/04/2009 - 1:52pm
Lynda

Dear Tamra,

You are seriously funny!
"Who's the boss?" Obviously, it's the vain and vacuous Simon. He actually counted the number of seconds Ramona hugged him and told Alex to invite her to the party based on that random act of stupidity! What a yutz!

05/04/2009 - 11:33am
Laurie B.

OMG Tamra - you're a riot! Love your comments!

I have to say though that I LOVE watching RHNY better than RHOC. And I HATE RH-Atlanta - icky women there. Also, the NJ girls are pretty awful themselves.

With the exception of Gretchen, I enjoy the OC women.

05/03/2009 - 12:00pm
Leigh Ann

You are hilarious! I havent followed the RH of Orange County the way I have the ladies of NY, but after reading your blogs I am a fan!

I have watched enought to know that you were dead on with Gretchen. You seem to be a good judge of people and call it like it is.

Maybe a spin off with you and Bethany is in the works! Zingers and One Liners from the Real Ladies of Both Coasts!

Hang in there and I wish you and your family well

05/02/2009 - 2:04pm
Julie

Tamra you are hilarious! I thought I was the only one watching who thought Kelly was on something...she really seems out there! Love you and wish the best for you and your family.

05/02/2009 - 12:43pm
elizabeth

Tamra, I like you, but I think that everybody is too hard on alex and simon.Kids are kids, I saw one episode when your daughter was acting up,but to me that is normal. I dont think that alex and simon get a fair deal. Everone judged them before they got to know them. Anyways, hope Ryan gets better soon.

05/02/2009 - 11:34am
Viewer

To Housewife junkie.
I can tell you what the OC housewives are going to do next season?? They will host a "charity event." Headed up by yours truly, Tamara. She's trying to be Bethenny, and we all know there's only ONE Bethenny! Oh, she's probably working on some sort of book too!

05/02/2009 - 9:47am
Sandy

Most of the Housewives have something to sell, Ramona and Kelly have their jewelry line, Jill has Zarin Fabrics, Vicki has her insurance co., Bethenny and Luanne have books. Its all fine and good. But when you promote a weight loss aid you better know all there is to know about it. There is no easy way to burn fat, gain muscle and lose weight. These weight loss suppliments are dangerous. They tout themselves as being all natural,but many of the ingredients overlap the new FDA warnings of Hydroxcut. So Tamyra, Vicki, Ramona, and Jeana watch what you lend your name to. I really thought most of you girls to be smarter than that.

05/01/2009 - 6:12pm
Viewer

Tamra,
Just tried to find you on Twitter with no luck! Your blogs is great and I'm sure your tweets will be too, but what name?
Please blog for for the NJ wives also.

05/01/2009 - 4:03pm
Jeanine

Tamra,
I agree with you about Kelly she acts like she's medicated whenever she opens her mouth. She can't remember things she says and she has a hard time making sense when she is trying to make a point. Also her Hieeeeeee and Byeeeeee in her little girl voice is REALLY annoying. How is she anyhow? Give me a break. She for me ranks as the most annoying NY housewife.

05/01/2009 - 3:41pm
Maria Isabella

Great blog Tamra-
Thanks also for the headsup about NJ- can't wait! Don't bust on NY so much because they are very entertaining in the least- even if Ra-moan-a has chuckie odor and sweats like a hostage under the pits!

05/01/2009 - 3:14pm
Viewer

Love ya Tamra! You have beauty, brains and a sense of humor!!! You already have a rockin' bod so I hope you don't overdo it! Houston, TX is watching all the Housewives and loving all of you!!! Keep the dramzzz coming!!!

05/01/2009 - 1:33pm
Housewives of CVS

LOL! Housewives of CVS!!

Good one!

05/01/2009 - 1:17pm
Viewer

THANK YOU! Finally another housewife notices what the rest of the viewers noticed. KELLY IS NOT SANE!!! It drives me crazy that the HSNY seem to all be pretending there is not an elephant in the room. Worse, they are not validating or backing up Bethany. At least you have the ovaries to say what is obvious to the rest of America.

05/01/2009 - 10:16am
Viewer

The only person who would totally "get" Kelly is Lynn--they both seem medicated. They can have their own show--The Housewives of CVS.

You always keep me laughing!

05/01/2009 - 10:10am
Viewer

Love your blogs. You are a hoot. Please consider writing more... books, articles, columns, etc. You are very articulate and have a wicked sense of humor.

05/01/2009 - 9:56am
OC fan

Tamra I was angry with you just a few months ago but you have won my heart again!
Nice to have you back to your witty happy self.
Thanks for blogging always a good read!

04/30/2009 - 10:55pm
Guido

Tamra, u rock. u r the best blogger/commentator. I can't wait for wives of NJ as well. NYC is so over. Kelly is too weird and doesn't fit in. the countess needs to find a new rich guy to pay for her lifestyle.
give Bethenny her own show, she's the only one of interest and just make sure she plugs Zarin fabrics once a show....LOL

Silex just creeps me out.

Tamra, can i be ur gay husband?

04/30/2009 - 10:15pm
D

Tamra you crack me up! I think this season of NYC has been one big comercial and it's boring on too! I hope your son is doing better and I can't wait till next season!

04/30/2009 - 8:48pm
Housewife Junkie

Tamara -
So, is filming for the next OC Housewives happening yet? Can't wait to see what is going on in the West Coast.

Yes - good reality TV is no good without the silly controversy, the fights and the drama that make your mouth drop! I'd love to see everyone "get along" - but that would be booooring!

But still - can't Bravo drop Kelly from the show? She brings nothing but stupidity to the show - there's got to be a more interesting Housewife in NY than that!!! I agree with you - Max is a fake - they can't really be dating!

Next season - go easy on the Tequila with Gretchen!

04/30/2009 - 6:06pm
Viewer

Great Blog, however, nothing tops the expression "Ass sphincter says what?" from earlier in the season. It still cracks me up!

04/30/2009 - 5:35pm
Viewer

Your botox comment is hysterical.

04/30/2009 - 2:23pm
Real Housewive of KS - FIghting PD

As usual Tamra your blog was hysterical.. if I didnt have an ostomy I think I would have peed in my pants (can I say that and it get printed hmmm). Oh my heart goes out to Ryan. I have Parkinsons and have had some nasty falls, long story short. I have a foot that was broken and has pins and a rod the length of my foot. So ouch.. I completely understand.. I was your age and I sure wanted my mom there!! You've come along way Tamra, I loved you the first season... was really not feeling you season two... but girl you are back fiesty and funnier than ever. I LOVE your sense of humour, more people should have it.. Promote away honey... its your shows:). Cant wait til next week.. ~ Mary Kellerman

04/30/2009 - 1:50pm
Billye

You are so funny. I love it. And you are correct that the last few shows for NY has sort of fizzled but hey - they are people just like the rest of us (but on tv and a little richer).

I hope your son is feeling better. Good for you putting him first.

And PS Kelly is so out there. She is going to be so embarrased when she watches herself. But then again. She won't be - because she just won't get it.

04/30/2009 - 12:27pm
Viewer

Sorry to hear about Ryan, I hope he gets better soon!

I hope you write blog for the New Jersey Housewives too. I know I will be watching since I am addicted to this series. I do think you Bravo should do a show with Texas's housewives. I know they have no shortage of wealthy housewives here.

Kelly does seem to be in her own world. It seems kind of pointless for Bethanny to argue with her.

I do not think Silex's boys are always have such bad behavior. They edit this show like crazy right? Sometimes I wonder if all of you women are great friends and stage arguments for higher ratings. Either way it's entertaining and great brain candy.

04/30/2009 - 12:22pm
Nicole

You write the best blogs. Who would have known, I wouldn't have expected it from you. Love it!

04/30/2009 - 10:54am
Viewer

you rock Tamra! How much did you get paid to endorse Duzoxin? hee hee. you should do a behind the scenes book on reality tv shows. that would sell big time.

04/30/2009 - 10:11am
FanFare

Hello Tamra,

I missed your clever comments last week. Hopefully, Ryan will feel better soon.

I couldn't agree with you more regarding Silex's street urchins. When I saw them running all over the store or clinging to Alex's leg and the parents did basically nothing to discipline them, I thought it was like the tail wagging the dog. Those boys know that "No" means "OK" when delivered by their permissive, clueless parents.

I couldn't agree with you less regarding their renovation. RED, black and gray are not warm and inviting, light or bright colors. The room looked austere, dark and grim. No wonder da boyz will remain wild childs.

Thanks again for your comical take on the season.

04/30/2009 - 9:40am
Melissa

Hi Tamra.
I love reading your blogs every week! I do have to respectfully disagree wtih you though. I don't think the NYC show is losing steam. They seem very real and are quite interesting - with the exception of Kelly. I watched the NJ show and I have to say, those ladies did nothing for me. They seem very self centered and they didn't seem like very happy people. I didn't hear any talk about doing things for charity or showing that they are good, nice people. It seemed like they are all "me, me, me!" It was a bore, and I have no interest! I think you'll find it will do the worst in the ratings. I still like the OC and NYC, but that's about it for me.

04/30/2009 - 8:43am
Viewer

Tamara,
Sorry about Ryan and the surgery. My brother went through surgery months ago, and my mom was a mess. I live in Orange County and know your son. I also know how he broke his foot the first time, drunk. Did you know he was drunk again when he re broke it. He is changing to a drunk and a As#$$le. And he is losing any friends he has left. I'm am worried that the next time, he will really get hurt. If you do really care for him,You should talk to him. Or better yet, have your husband do it. He seems to be the only person Ryan respects and fears.
m.

04/30/2009 - 6:55am
stan

Tamra
You really-really have a talent for writing. (I stole the twice used adjective from Kelly) lol
Your blogs are very entertaining.

04/30/2009 - 5:02am
Viewer

You are so vulgar and raw. I love it. Welcome back.

04/30/2009 - 3:24am
Trish

Missed you last week! Sorry to hear about Ryan. Hope he feels better!

o.k. I was sooo looking for your blog last week because I just HAD TO HEAR what you thought about Kelly RUNNING IN THE STREET like she was entitled to just run in front of cars and let the world move for her. OMG she is pathetic!!

04/30/2009 - 12:08am
Debbie

Tamara I think you are phenomenal and full of life lady.I love the fact that you don't care about what people have to say, and that you stand up for what you believe in.Keep speaking your mind cause this all makes a lot of sense.Love you!!!

P.S.
You were right about Gretchen....just saying

04/29/2009 - 11:38pm
Jacqueline

Tamra,

your blogs are by far the funniest and most entertaining!!!!

04/29/2009 - 10:56pm
Viewer

i love you tamra ...

and simon is the house wife in his alezander mcquuen aND jimmy chossss

04/29/2009 - 10:01pm
Sarah T

Tamra, you crack me up. You make me miss Cali soooo bad ugh! hubby is in the Navy (he is getting out in like 2 weeks) Then we are moving to middle of nowhere, Texas. Both of our families live in Sactown, CA. I miss everything about it. I'm currently in crappy Virginia Beach, VA. Which apparently, as I was told by a co-worker my first day " We don't take people from California seriously out here"... psh.. Thats just cause they don't know how to take a joke and have fun like we do on the west coast!!! Thats why I love you, cause you just exude everything that California represents, FUN! haha. just had to show some love.

04/29/2009 - 9:46pm
Lucy

I love NYC but totally agree with you it has fizzled!
I use to like Jill but she has turned into one big promotional spot!!

04/29/2009 - 8:29pm
Warren Friendly

April 29, 2009

Dear Tamra,

Right on about Jill Zarin. She definitely the most calm lady when dealing with customer's wild kids. Also you are right that kids need to know who is the boss. My mother always using the face like you do to get kid to quit rowdy behavior. I am one of the four children (the only one who is deaf) and my father is always away on Navy duty back in our day. It was hard for her to jingle children with full time job and worry about my dad. I am now 46 years old and my mother is widow since 1996. It was a great memory for me when you mention "the face". Thank for mention it.

Warren Friendly

04/29/2009 - 6:45pm
astrology 101

Ryan is a Pisces. This sign rules the feet. I am so sorry that in his case it seems to prove problematic. I hope he gets better soon.

04/29/2009 - 6:39pm
KeeLee<3

Finally the blog I've been waiting for for like almost two centuries! JK(:
Hope Ryan's recovery goes well.

So I totally agree with everything you just said...ha..douche those pits..ha. I'm so excited for RH:NJ and the finale of RH:NY. Like you said I really hope they bring it!

Kelly...can't stand her...Bethenny should just clock her in the mouth one good time so for once we don't listen to her talk.

So I really hope you're gonna blog on RH:NJ as well as Bethenny(:
I just can't see the blog page without yall's pictures(:

Hope all is well for your loved ones!

04/29/2009 - 5:11pm
BarbnGa

For once I agree with you. RHoNJ seems like it's gonna rock, and NY is awesome. Apparently it should just be east coast.

04/29/2009 - 4:52pm
Sabina

You are so funny and love your blogs. I am going to find you on tweets. :)

04/29/2009 - 4:44pm
Nancy W

Tamra,
You are so funny!! I love your critque about the New York houswives! You are more interesting the they are!!!

04/29/2009 - 3:42pm
REBEKAH05

Tamra,

You rock and are so much hotter than Gretchen!

04/29/2009 - 3:40pm
Viewer

Tamra,
You look great without Duzoxin. Is Vicki really someone you want to emulate physically? Just stick to natural, healthy ways of staying fit and energized. You already look great for a 41 year old!

04/29/2009 - 3:36pm
rebekah05

Tamra,

I think you rock! You are the hottest housewife. Not Gretchen. She is hot too, but she is very cocky and tries to act all innocent. It's pathetic. You have a great body too. I am only 35 but your body is better than mine. I can't wait to see you bee yourself in next seasons episodes because yourself if what makes you so beautiful.

Hugs,

Rebekah - Philly, PA

04/29/2009 - 3:11pm
LaineyLainey

Tamra - well you've gone and done it! I've always thought you are funny and admit you have many great qualities, but I've never liked your bully tactics. HOWEVER, your blog does crack me up (when I am not wincing). But your botox comment was priceless. Way to not take yourself too seriously. Thanks for the giggle.

04/29/2009 - 2:29pm
MNface

Love it! You took the words right out of my mouth!

04/29/2009 - 2:21pm
NYCViewer

Hilarious blog! Although Simon and Alex are kind of creepy, the one thing I like is that they really love and respect each other. Hope Ryan gets better soon.

04/29/2009 - 2:18pm
Viewer

Tamara, you are a real hoot! I missed you last week, I agree with you about Kelly, I really don't think that she is playing with a full deck. Either that, or she is just plain stupid! Those brats of Silex are something else, like you, all I had to do was give my kids the look, and they behaved. I can't believe how they just stood there and let them practically tear the place down. Remember the dinner party last season when Francois was messing with others food, and screaming like a banchi?

04/29/2009 - 2:17pm
ViewerK

Tamra, love your blog!!!!!!!!!!!!!

04/29/2009 - 2:13pm
Viewer

I LOVE YOU TAMRA U R & ALWAYS WILL BE MY FAV :)

04/29/2009 - 2:13pm
Sue

Tamara,

I think you have found your calling. I love your comments and play by play of the housewives. Please keep it up when we start watching the New Jersey ladies.

04/29/2009 - 1:51pm
Lauren

OMG Tamara! i am so glad you spoke on the Max situation.Let's be real here. Kelly is 3 sheets to the wind. Who walks around Manhattan in a swimsuit and says they kept it appropriate for the kids lmao.
I can't wait to see the jersey housewives either. There's nothing better than loud-mouthed Gotti style italian-americans. Except Dina. A. She already did a reality show about her wedding a few years ago so I'm sensing someone too desperate for air time. B. I cannot stand poor women that marry rich men and they think they are rich too and start acting snobby. All it takes is one good divorce lawyer to remind you that it's his money and not yours. And back to the townhouse and Corolla in the garage.

04/29/2009 - 1:45pm
CC

You're finally back! I was waiting to see your hilarious posts! I agree that Kelly is annoying and nauseating, and I love Bethanny and Jill. I, too, can't wait for the Jersey wives, it's like a car wreck, you just gotta watch! Of course Jersey women will complain it's not like them, but I'm from NY, Long Island, I don't live like the NY women, but I don't complain. NY is full of different women, and so is Jersey! I can't wait to see you blog on them!

04/29/2009 - 1:32pm
Viewer

Tamra, I really look forward to your blogs, they are hilarious. And i agree with you about Kelly, she is OUT THERE big time. As for Max, my feeling is she met him at a modelling agency, and in return for pretend dating, he is getting all kinds of air time, with an eye to a future on TV here.

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