Broken Engagements and College-Bound Kids!

Jill Zarin's mother, Gloria, responds to reader comments and questions.

Have a question for Jill Zarin's mother, Gloria? Post your questions in the comments below and check back next week for Gloria's widsom and advice!

Dear Gloria,
I really value your advice and I'm really at a loss so I thought I'd ask for advice. I recently broke off an engagement and I am a complete mess. I feel physically sick (stomach pain, headaches, insomnia), I have nightmares all the time, and I just cry all of the time. I don't know how to put one foot in front of the other at this point. Please help :( Thank you so so so much.
Skileahy

Dear Skileahy,
I understand your pain. There really isn't very much to do at this point. If, however, the despair goes on for much longer, you should seek counseling. Try your very best to get out as much as possible with friends anywhere for any reason. Movies, dinners etc. Sometimes events take time to sort feelings out. You WILL recover and feel better. Only problem is WHEN. You will start to "live" again.
Gloria

Dear Gloria, mother extraordinaire,
My youngest child, a lovely daughter, is a senior in high school and will be leaving for college shortly in August. What words of advice would you impart? She has always been fortunate enough to have her big brothers around to protect her, but she will venture far and away from her family. She endured three operations with the most recent in June and from this experience she created a social network internet support group for recovering teenagers and hosts over 245 members internationally. So she has a giving heart. Keep up the great work!
XOXO
Lisa

Hi Lisa,
Thank you for the kind words. Your daughter will be fine. Call her every few days and let her know that she can call or write as often as possible. If you can, drive up to see her every month. That is what we did when our oldest went off to college. (She was only 17 at the time.) Perhaps one of your sons can see her and/or call very often. She will do just fine. Obviously she is lucky to have such a great mom. Good luck.
Gloria

My questions is how do I handle in-laws that call twice a year, never see their grandson or phone to see how he or their son is. When I do see them it's hard to be polite. Let me know what you think.
Thanks.
Lori-Ann

Hi,
The next time they call, put your husband on the phone, or if he isn't home, tell them to call back. Say, "Thank you for calling!" and hang up. Sorry to be so abrupt, but I fail to see why you would want to even talk to them.
Gloria

Hi Gloria, I hope that you and your family are doing well. I was wondering what advice you would have for someone who lacks some self confidence because of bullying/drama that has gone on in the past?
Viewer

Hi. You really haven't given me enough information to help you. Please write again and try to furnish more fully.
Gloria

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