Jill Zarin

Jill addresses the Ramona and Jennifer situation, and ponders Ramona's core.

on May 13, 20110

Cindy invited me over to see her apartment so we could get to know each other. After all, we are going to be spending a lot of time together! I knew she was friends with Ramona so I was a little nervous, but I knew when I first met her she was my kind of girl. We both come from Long Island, and we are the same age, and we found out we have friends in common.

When Cindy said "Ramona's core is not good," it validated a lot of the feelings I have had over the years. We have a lot of friends in common. Cindy said, "We have our ups and lows" (she meant downs), but we accept Ramona for who she is. What the heck does that mean? Why would anyone accept someone who makes so many condescending remarks and offers little respect to anyone? I didn't want to gossip about Ramona, but when someone starts talking. . .well it was hard to sit there and say nothing -- especially if you are a filming a reality show.

Cindy said "her core is not good." Is she right? I always try to find the good in people. I let a lot of things go in regards to Ramona, and years have passed. Maybe it's time to take a serious look at our friendship. Ramona invited us to a wine tasting party this week. Even though Bobby had to come home from work a little early to make it, we showed up. Am a just a glutton for punishment?

Side comment: How cute are Cindy's little girls? I am available for babysitting!

89 comments
killin me
killin me

Jill - you rock! hang in there and I am proud of you for standing up to Ramona!

EQ Abby
EQ Abby

Jill, your work toward addressing and eliminating bullying is inspiring! I was going to let you know on your personal website, but found that the 'Contact' portion of your site is not currently functional - just wanted you to know!

<3
<3

u are so adorable! i feel terribly you've been treated so badly :( keep your chin up gorgeous! xoxo

bubba lou
bubba lou

Good job Jill!! you and Luann are my favorites, but Kelly is so funny!! So I'm loving her too:) I'm so glad that you are building your confidence back... I've watched this show for years, and was so disappointed in Bethanny... you have made the show better - thanks for coming back and being strong!!

BabooSkaAsh
BabooSkaAsh

It seemed to me, that your "friend" Jennifer just wanted some tv time, and what better way then to drag up some drama. If she was your friends she wouldn't have sought out Ramona and told her. She had the choice to brush it off her shoulders the moment it happened, she didn't have to bring it up as if that is what describes her wedding day. She didn't make the cut last year to be on the show, so maybe she's just searching in some way to be noticed this year. Sorry honey, your not apart of the show, get over it! : ) I love you Jill and keep doing your thing. Ramona insists that your always bad mouthing her, she really needs to take a good look in the mirror.

NanA4
NanA4

No Jill, sorry. All of the talking over Jennifer doesn't change the truth. You said those things, and then tried to convince the person you said it to, that it was someone else who said it. Incredible! You may think that the hug you gave Jennifer makes everything okay. WRONG! And here I thought that you were trying to change, but you know what they say about leopards.....

NanA4
NanA4

No Jill, sorry. All of the talking over Jennifer doesn't change the truth. You said those things, and then tried to convince the person you said it to, that it was someone else who said it. Incredible! You may think that the hug you gave Jennifer makes everything okay. WRONG! And here I thought that you were trying to change, but you know what they say about leopards.....

Ms. Faye
Ms. Faye

I want to like you again Jill, because I think your funny. But stop crying about everything. You know Ramona, she's crazy and will say the first thing that comes to mind. Don't let people get together, you have too much going for yourself. I hope you show better, renews Jill this season (Jillicize).

Wendy Alison
Wendy Alison

Didn't I see you in the audience with your sister at the Oprah show?

smw
smw

I know right!

JordanKentState
JordanKentState

Hey Jill! I think you're such a sweet lady and you make the show so fun to watch :o) Although, you shouldn't let Ramona get to you. I wish I could meet you, girl! You, Luann and Kelly seem so nice and like you'd be so fun to go out on the town with in NYC! I'd love to go to New York and meet you girls, because I live in boring Ohio haha. I know you're probably so busy, but I hope you get a chance to read this message and if you do will you email me back at: jscharfe@kent.edu. Take care and try to ignore people like Ramona and Alex (they're not worth your time) because youre awesome! Love ya!

housewife fan
housewife fan

Jill i think you are the greatest housewife. you, Luan and Cindy are the only ones who think like normal people. ramona and sonjua are psycos. they make no sense. cut the ties with them. they are no good for your perfect personality. you are my favorite. i think you are beautiful and i really believe you when you say you are making a change in your life. stay strong and keep away from those who pull you down and suck the life out of you. you just dust your shoes off and walk right on past them. they are vicious, rude and heartless women. but don't let them win! ONE of your MANY biggest fans!! :)

Paul DeMero
Paul DeMero

Mrs Z, my boyfriend and I think you're the queen of the show, but you seem to have lost some of your confidence. Get it together and show these other "ladies" how its done! XO

Barb B.
Barb B.

You're still my favorite jill! Don't let them get you down. I think you have style and star quality.

Viewer in Maine
Viewer in Maine

Jill, you make mistakes like the rest of us - it is called being human. Don't spend too much time apologizing to people who aren't really your friends. All the best.

jzlilomeeinfla
jzlilomeeinfla

Jill, I have to admit that I was surprised at the lashing you took last season. You talk no more about other people than Ramona does. I was on your side all the way and I am sorry that more of your fans did not come out against all the negativity. You took a hard hit last year. I hope you're starting to realize that just because people travel in the same circles, it doesn't mean they are your friends. You don't seem to have the same problems with Luann or Kelly that you have with Alex or Ramona so you have to ask yourself are you really the problem? People can say what they want about Kelly (and although I am not a big fan), she does not feel intimidated or feel obligated to bow down to Ramona. As far as this pecking order that Sonja mentioned, we all know that you are at the very top. Try not to let shallow people like Ramona or Alex define who you really are. I'm glad you're back.

PhillyLuv
PhillyLuv

Jill....when you saw the bride outside and confonted her...she confirmed what she related to Ramona...that you questioned her at her wedding about Alex being invited! You have a lot of nerve suggesting that the bride should have run her guest list past you! Why don't you just stay at home next time. Now, Ramona was absolutely wrong in the way that she approached you, but you should have not engaged her in her foolishness!!! Walk away! You don't have to respond, especially when you see how worked up she was. You've known her for years so you should have known it was going to be no reasoning with her at that point....right or wrong.

Viewer569
Viewer569

I think you should be nicer to your collegues

Texas Mom
Texas Mom

Hi Jill, I have always been on your side because I feel you are the most down to earth of them all. It seems everyone wants to take what you say out of context and try to label you the "mean girl". Me for one, if you have a good friend getting married you CAN call or text them and ask who's coming to the wedding (I'm sure everyone has done it at least once) It's a natural question. Jennifer should have NEVER brought it up at the wine party. I think she was looking for her 5 minutes in front of the camera because how can you say something like that to someone and not expect a reaction. She was starting s***, and not being your friend at all. (I'm sure she watched last season) I have notice this with Ramona, she picks up what other people say and she uses it in her own story about that person. Romana should not say anything about lying because she has been caught in many of her own. I think this season is really great and can't wait for more!!! Good luck.

WindyCityWondering
WindyCityWondering

JIll, we know the season has all been taped but now that it is showing here are a few tips for how to handle viewers' response. First, own what you did and apologize without an excuse for it. Second, don't call other people liars! You can be graceful, forgiving, positive and kind - this will save your fan base, because without fans there is no point for you being on RH NY. Good luck!

alexandracoco
alexandracoco

love u jill..but pls stop talking about people behind their back..just confront them if u have to.. love u

dancinstan
dancinstan

Love you Jill. There has been drama in the past and the hosts at the 'parties' of those problems did not consider what guess get along with whom. Thats how all the fight begin. So, also consider the host while asking who will be on the guest list. Its not that out of line in this situation. I love that fact that you care. Its rare these days.

gracie1258
gracie1258

Jill, Please get off this "reality" show. These women are just TOXIC!! The only ones that I would trust are Kelly and Cindy. These women are not friends, friends do not dissect every movement and judge every facial expression. You have looked into yourself and saw that you were not your best and you made changes to get back to who you really are. You have been dragged down once DON'T let it happen again. Get out now and find some real friends who don't feel the need to air kiss at judge at every turn. Be yourself and be happy!! You really desere it.

NY MINX
NY MINX

jill you and the countess are my favorite housewives out of all the seasons of housewives. you rise above the tasteless pettiness(which is Ramona) and show nothing but class..please dont let the "haters" get you down unfortranatly there are too may "Ramona's" in the world and just keep in mind with friends like Ramona who needs enemies.. you are sassy but you keep it classy and dont ever let the Ramonas of the world tear you down

Cheryl E
Cheryl E

I'm SO tired of Jill. Now she's crying over something Ramona said. She should have never asked Jennifer those questions at her wedding. She and Ramona have been friends for years. Did her (Ramona's) "core" just turn bad or has it always been that way? I think you're having the same problem with Ramona that you had with Bethanny last year. Her cosmetic line is taking off and now with the introduction of her wine, you don't want her to "outdo" you. I think you're just plain JEALOUS.

Viewer from Maryland
Viewer from Maryland

I remember the line in the Bambi move: If you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all. If you adopted that philosophy, then we would never hear from you. You NEVER have anything nice to say.

SF Viewer
SF Viewer

Jill, I don't think that Ramona was "setting your up" at her party, because it shows that Jennifer told her those things you said that same evening, so of course when she saw you she was still feeling emotional and raw about it. She chose to talk to you at the time, which may not have been the best choice, but it was not an attack. Cindy seems very two-faced and a bit of a back stabber, so if you think you can trust her, you'd better think again. I'm confused about your remarks that Ramona set you up last season w/Bethenny. Didn't you say that your friends should have forced you two to make up, yet when Ramona actually tried, you call it a "set up." I think Ramona only had the best intentions. I do however notice that LuAnn is repeating last season in that she then was encouraging you to end your friendship with Bethenny, and now she is encouraging you to end your friendship with Ramona. So eventually you will only be friends with LuAnn? Good luck!!!

OVHouse Wife
OVHouse Wife

Jill,

I really adore U & ur family! UR Mother is such a gift, as is your beautiful daughter. I think ur sister is so interesting, and wish we got to see more of her. Bobby is so wonderful. U seem to have such a great union. He isn't standing around while you make a fool of yourself over indulging in your Pinot Grigio!!!

It makes me sad that you have been abused by people like Bethany & Ramona. When Bethany had nothing she had NO problem taking anything U & Bobby had to offer. She is something I would wipe off the bottom of my Louboutins!!!

I hope that Cindy turns out to be a true & decent friend. U r deserving of that! Don't U spend ANY of ur time worrying about the people that are not worthy of someone like U!! U r sensitive, and do not need to let those "MEAN GIRLS" bring U down. U should take a hint from the Countess, and excuse yourself from interacting with those drama Queens!!

It is nice to see you & Kelly getting closer. I think Kelly is a nice person, aand isn't coming from a place where she is on the attack, or wants to use you for anything! I wish U the best. TEAM JILL ALL THE WAY!! U r a gem!!

martag
martag

Jill - simply put - there is no one better than you!!! You have it all - great family - great style - and more than that - class!!! Ramona and Alex - yuk. I truly don't know how you even looked Ramona in the face without just breaking out in a laugh. While I realize that Bethenny has all this "wonderful stuff going on in her life" which we of course hear about all the time - double yuk - it is you that really have it all. You have a wonderful husband that you do not boss around, like someone that I won't mention. You make us laugh without having to bleep it out!! You are, quite simply, a breath of fresh air. When we see Alex or Ramona, we immediately feel tension. With you, Jill, it is the "Ah" feeling. Best of luck forever to you. By the way, your book is just wonderful.

TeriGia
TeriGia

Jill, people love you and see the true color of Ramona, Alex, Bethany, and Sonja. Keep away from them and don't say anything about them to anyone, not even to yourself. Party with Cindy, the countess, and the new Brunette girl. The bride is a no-no also. she has a big mouth and she didn't have to report to Ramona what you said at the wedding.

Olena
Olena

Jill is amazing! I love her! I get so mad when Ramona starts fights with Jill.

Jill, you rock!!!!

NYCinLa
NYCinLa

I have been invited to many weddings over the years and I have never asked who else was invited. My attending is never based on who else will be there but rather on my own schedule and the realation that I share with the Bride and Groom. So I do not understand why you would have expected the Bride to share that she also invited Alex.

WindyCityWondering
WindyCityWondering

Jill - you have been edited so badly this season! Bravo should be ashame for what they are doing to you - the horrible things they make you say! Oy vey! If you don't want trouble than stay away from it and then you will have nothing to apologize for anything! Don't let Bravo make you look bad.

Loyal viewer
Loyal viewer

I really dont understand why people dislike you! I've never seen you blatantly trying to hurt anyone. We are all human and make mistakes but you seem to own up to yours. You seem different this season ( better ) and more relaxed. You are focused on what really matters and it's not stupid petty high school bs with women. Who cares about anything else....it's all fluff and bullsh*t anyway.

loyal viewer
loyal viewer

Jill was out of hand last season. This season, she is the old Jill again and very likable. Ramona really knows how to belittle people. This is class? Would be happy to give lessons.

Northwest Viewer
Northwest Viewer

I read your website additional blog where you said the "Bride" wanted to be on the show and you got her an audition. She set you up to get airtime. How sad. On a side note, I loved that you were there for Cindy in the dentist office! When you are doing something so expensive and *somewhat* permanent, it is great to get another opinion outside of the dentist's. I wish you well and hope that you get lots of support outside of the blogs and the show.

BarbinGa
BarbinGa

Jill, you look fabulous this season! Last season was too much make up for my taste and you look years younger. I have to ask though, having planned a wedding or two myself...how is a bride expected to run a guest list past everyone, including guests? I can't imagine in days leading up to my wedding having to answer to others about my decisions. I would take great care as a good hostess not to seat them together at the reception, but other than that they dont owe anyone an explanation.

Izzy G
Izzy G

TEAM BRUNETTES! You are my favorite housewife of NY.

Oregonmom27
Oregonmom27

Jill,

So sorry that thing turned out the way they did at Ramona's party. Ramona really should have just asked you if you two could meet for lunch the following week instead of bringing it up in public. You handled yourself with class and should give yourself a pat on the back.

I can see that you have really come along way in trying to deal with people in a different way than you did last year. I think you are doing a wonderful job, don't let the other Housewives pull you down.

DarBnc
DarBnc

In what universe is a bride supposed to get YOUR approval for her guest list?

Friends1213@aol.com
Friends1213@aol.com

Bravo, I'm glad you stopped apologizing. Enough already, maybe you did say it but so what. Ramona is no moral compass or Jill fan. Keep your head up.

jbs79
jbs79

i wasn't a huge fan of you last season...but i will say in the few episodes you have been in so far this season, i have seen a very positive change in you and it is great!! it seems you are really happy and comfortable in this "new skin" and i wish you all the best. stay true to yourself and all the right people will stay true to you.

KB27
KB27

Glad you are trying harder this year. I am a big believer in chances. But I am completely surprised you would say you wished people would have made you and Bethenny make up or was it put you in a room together until you made up... I believe they tried to do that but you wouldn't even talk to Bethenny. Interesting...

Don't mess with Texas
Don't mess with Texas

You didn't deserve what Ramona did that was so rudddd of her, but whatever she is the only one that came out looking likea fool and at her own party at that!!!!! Love you!!!

Oregonmom27
Oregonmom27

WOW! I can't believe no one has commented yet!

Well, I have to say Jill that you were attacked by Ramona and what Ramona did was completley WRONG. I can see that you have changed and you are really trying to treat people with more respect. You just need to stay out of the drama. Ramona will get what is coming to her. Karma is a B**ch!

maree
maree

Ramona's core is right and no, Cindy who raises questions in my mind is not right about that and other things. Ramona is good at heart, core and every which way. Quirky at times but compared to some very, very sane. Say that because Kelly talks of Ramona's frame of mind. Kelly is the one that comes unglued. Kelly has issues not Ramona.