Aviva Drescher

Aviva doesn't think Ramona needs to go to rehab, but she does have some choice words for her behavior.

on Sep 24, 20120

In St. Barths, I raised my voice, pointed fingers, and name called. I was wrong and have tried to express my remorse to those I hurt. Sonja truly got caught in the crossfire, and no one deserved my rants, frayed nerves or not.

I have learned the hard way that I do have a tendency to over-exaggerate to make a point. Unfortunately, the substance behind my words often gets lost. For example, was I really ceasing my friendship with Carole because she was smoking pink cigarettes? Of course not, I was just being flippant with a good friend who gets my humor.

The breakfast with Ramona, however, was a different matter. Yes, it was the aftermath of St. Barths, but my frustration with Ramona had been building for a long time and finally it came to a head. It is so much easier to say nothing and ignore things, but a cancer growing is not good either. While I sounded shrill, I could not keep it all bottled inside any longer.

649 comments
treewest
treewest

Aviva.... I encourage you to sit down with someone who is brave enough to be brutally honest with you .... perhaps a doctor or counsellor who understands people with anxiety issues, and watch the last 3 Housewives episodes from the St. Barts trip on. . Payment might be involved..haha. Perhaps they will be brave enough to take you on and help you to see how atrocious your behaviour really is. It is not defenceable. It just isn't. It is so outrageous and elitist. I don't understand it at all. In addition to your behaviour, all of the things that disturb you about Ramona and Sonja in regards to their lack of moral character are seen in your father times 10! And you excuse it like it is nothing. Fathers do not get a free pass in what is expected from them when interacting with people whom he is not close with. He may be kind and loved by many but the things that come out of that man's mouth. It is not cute, it makes my skin crawl. I have to fast forward the show when he comes on. Come on.....my dad is my hero to but if he acted in the manner your father does....when he never showed such tendancies growing up.....I would have him checked out by a qualified, certified specialist in senior mental health. I am not trying to insult you. And I am not a doctor. But I have seen such changes in people dealing with early onset dementia. I really think you need to spend the time and energy you seem to spend tearing down your castmates on your own family circle. It would be of great benefit to you and your family if you are willing to face the reality of what is really going on. Just a thought.

AmazingNPink
AmazingNPink

Diva, does not need to come back next season. The way you speak to grown women was HORID. You planed for your Father to go up to Ramona charity event and stir the pot. Your an elitist! If you speak to your kids like the way I have heard you speak to the others then your poor kids will need a lot of therapy! Make this the only season for you, do your charity work, give the nanny a day or 2 off and spend time with your kids.I will end this with Bless your heart.........google that vassar university! FYI the world does not revolve around you!!!

 

bmj00004
bmj00004

Your father was "ejected" because he refused to leave when he was asked to leave nicely. Also, why on planet earth would you think that after they way you had been verbally attacking Ramona that it would be ok for you or any other member of your family to show up at any even of hers. You say it was in the name of "charity", you could have mailed the check. I think Ramona was very kind to your father when he showed up, until he wanted to talk about you. Then he refused to drop it when she asked him to please drop it. I guess I am confused how such an "educated" woman like yourself doesn't understand how this happened and why you take no part in this? Also why do you act like your father is some wilted geriatric wallflower? His outrageous behavior would suggest otherwise, so please stop bringing up that he's "80". He was just on TV a few weeks prior discussing how he would like to make your new friends "squirt" when they orgasm, DISGUSTING, and to use your words, trashy and classless. 

 

L.I.oness
L.I.oness

The bottom line, Aviva, is that yes, you should have put the check in the mail. In no way was it appropriate for you to send your father to that charity event.

 


methinks
methinks

I agree. You need a different therapist. So over you it's unreal. Hope this is your last season.

By the way, there's no excuse for your behavior. I know lots of people with anxiety disorders and they don't act like you. I think you use your anxiety as an EXCUSE for your behavior.

bugsea54
bugsea54

Sorry Aviva nobody does really understand anxiety.  I do, and symptoms of anxiety is irritability. You did need a warm welcome from people who cared about you.   Ramona only cares for herself.  She was way out of line calling your ex husband.  She is a low down dirty skank and so is her husband.  Stay away from her.  She has everyone snowballed into thinking you are out of line.  When you had lunch with her you should have stuck to the facts Ramona tried to change the subject when you called her out on calling your ex husband.  Thats how Ramona is, she definitely out of line.  Shall I remind all of you who are against Aviva that Ramona was childish when she didn't want Aviva's husband to come.  That started the whole thing.   So come on.  Stop sticking up for Ramona she is white trash and poor Sonja is caught in the cross fire.  Ramona is a pot stirrer.  Your all way off base. 

t_pat14
t_pat14

Aviva, you are way out of your bounds, what do you care that Ramona and Sonja are living it up in St Bart's?? You were not there when they were up until 4am, who are you to call them out on what you did not witness yourself? Relax yourself and enjoy the ride. You only have fifteen minutes of fame, don't go down as a judgemental witch!

ames1971
ames1971

Aviva

Hate to say it but I think Heather was right in asking you "when are you going to defend me Aviva?" It took a turn of the tables for you to see what Heather was seeing early on with Sonja and Ramona--sometimes observing proves more valuable then jumping in with both feet and overtly reacting to every bump in the road.  I am sympathetic to your anxieties and phobias and I recall you saying that when you were young you didnt have children and the phobias were not as prevelent. I too had similar experiences after my daughter was born and meditation and medication helped immensly have you tried either of these, I continue to be a fan-I like that you are wealthy and do actually give to charity unlike Sonja who for some reason this season appears to be doging charity events (is it because of her divorce-no money) who knows. I still like you and appreciate you just relax a little more breathe and dont react so passionatly to everything. It all comes out in the wash.

 

peachykeene
peachykeene

Aviva, I start by saying I can't imagine how difficult it is to be under the microscope of reality TV. I'm sure the viewers see a skewed picture of what happens in any given situation, and reading the comments must be difficult. We see isolated events in your lives, and that doesn't give the vicarious viewer real insight into any of the situations we watch, but you friends and castmates have shared much of your experience, and they have cried Uncle. Repeatedly.  You have belabored every point you have staked out. You talk of graciousness, but you did not exhibit it. At St Barths you were agressive, and in the episode after St Barths it seemed as if you spent most of your time on damage control, meeting with the other RHONYC in the effort to smooth over your inappropriate projections. Your genuine concern over friends is colored by your own issues, and saying ugly things to someone's face does not make you right. I think there is no match for graciousness like Carole, realness like Heather, or Sonja's honest nature. They are hostesses who's  brand of hospitality I would welcome. Yours, not so much.

toolbandfan
toolbandfan

I am really shocked at Aviva's anger & hostility.  The things that came out of her mouth were so rude & horrible.  I wonder if it makes her feel better about herself to put other people down.  There is just no justification for her behavoir.  I don't ever think I have seen anyone this mean & nasty!!

morasutil
morasutil

Why do you care about other people's behavior ? If someone on vacation wants to get drunk or have sex, that's not of your bussiness !!

moniepj
moniepj

Please look at the footage again.  George did not just touch Ramona's arm.  You can see her skin severely indented from his fingers in a very firm, pinching grip.  It is not acceptable and he was much more than just a little out of line.  Yes! he deserved to be dumped out on his dirty old keister, and I was happy to see it happen!

stacey.ricco
stacey.ricco

Thank you Aviva for sharing your experience with anxiety.  It is serious for me since I am also experiencing anxiety and panic attacks.  I am now going to the doctor and taking some tests to find out the reason for these attacks.  It is serious and it is very scary.  I am a mother who is about the same age as yourself who has two small boys.  I just want to thank you for being so brave.  I do not feel so alone in this situation and can realize it can happen to anyone.  It started for me after 911 when I worked in the city for about 5 years.  I had my first attack commuting and we were stuck in a tunnel.  I had a fear of terrorism back then.  I continued to commute for four more years.  It went away for a few years and now it is back.  I just want everyone to know that people who do suffer from this are not crazy.  This is real and a lot of people do not understand it.  I appreciate you for educating the public about this....

Bellisamo
Bellisamo

Aviva, you possess many wonderful, inspiring qualities but your aggressiveness is akin to a pit bull when you're on a raging roll.  I'll give you a pass on Ramona and her side-kick Sonya since they're both truly rude, immature, self-centered, raging alcoholics w/little regard for others w/their comments and embarrassing behaviors. But sometimes you tend to come off as condescending and selfish. I love your delightful dad, George. Please don't let your emotions get in the way of the message. I still admire you courageous lady.

KansasLady
KansasLady

I'm glad to finally see someone with the cajones to call Ramona out on her obnoxious and belittling behavior. It's just unfortunate that in the process your behavior is just as obnoxious in a different way. For some reason Ramona has a huge fan base so you're going to have trouble finding popularity with most of the RHONY viewers. If you're able to stomach it, maybe you'll be able to remedy some of this next season if you're given the chance. Keep your head up. I happen to like you.

sarah100
sarah100

what kind of phobia is going to come out of you today Aviva, you remind me of the energizer bunny with relentless search for The Apology.

sbowen
sbowen

I was not sure where to make this post and ultimately decided to post it on the Aviva Blog.  Aviva, if you were on the outs with someone would you reject a donation being made on behalf of a charitable cause.  At first, Ramona said she didn't want your money.  The money wasn't for her it was for a charity for which the funds were being raised.  Furthermore, would you reveal the amount of the donation even if the donor claimed to donate more than the actual donation?  I don't think so.  Of all the bad behavior I have seen on this show this was the worst. 

chrisn916
chrisn916

You are not entertaining for this show at all.  I am going to have to stop watching NYC if they do not get you off the show.  It is unfortunate that because one person on the show is so annoying that viewers are lost.

vassago0905
vassago0905

You were just being flippant with a good friend who gets your humor…really??? Humor, what humor??? Did I miss something???

Blueheathers
Blueheathers

Aviva you are so refreshing! A housewife who Blogs in an honest manner, admitting fault and accepting responsibility when you are wrong, and clearly explaining yourself when you are right- it's so unheard of. 

Ramona is unwatchable, she makes me nauseas with her fake nice behavior, and her self serving mean antics. She is the reason I stopped watching RHWNY, every word out her mouth is nails on a chalkboard. You and Carole are the reason I am a fan. 

I also like how you explain your dad's behavior, very classy. 

 

Panggako
Panggako

Why is it not ok for Sonja to bring guys to the house at St. Barths? After all she's single. But it's fine for Luann? And she's supposed to be engaged? WOW!!! For someone who's very "educated" doesn't have a lot of common sense. I think you're better off muting yourself for the rest of the season coz you sure love to contradict yourself. 

suse0912
suse0912

Aviva:  I truly liked you in the beginning and i know we all "lose" it.  However, why is all your anger directed at Ramona?  I know she's flaky and outspoken (usually too bluntly) but your comments about thinking Ramona was the culprit here was absurd.  All of a sudden it's like you are so focused on her with your remarks it's baffling.  Are you not aware that not only ramona, but Luanne, Sonya and eventually Heather "all" felt the dynamic was changed since you arrived with Reid?  Are you not aware when you were making your nasty comments about "men int house" (oh my heaven forbid!) was who LUANNE brought home??  why was that not directed at her?  She's an instigator and for all your claims to be so "intelligent" why did you make it sound like Ramona and Sonya were the ones?  Having lunch with Sonya and trying to come between a 20 year friendship w Ramona was disgusting and degrading to Sonya your remark to Ramona "you look pretty good next to Sonya dont you".  How insulting?  They are like sisters and it was obvious that you wanted to come between the two of them.  Sonya had as much to do with their dismay over Reid as Ramona (and Luanne as well).  but you choose to focus on Ramona.  When the girls tried to move on in Barth all you could say was the apology was phony.  They just wanted to move on Aviva and no matter how much they tried to calm the situation your attitude was "it's not a geniune apology".  You were hell bent on just keeping it going.  Frankly i don't blame them as most of us think they had nothing to apologize about.  What happened to you??  You seem like Jekyll and Hyde and i was taken aback.  Even your friend Heather (who i like) is really getting sick of you.  If you are say it's your "duty" to behave like that,  then you should have real issue with Bravo!  Even when Carole said that Ramona and Sonya were talking about the plane which made her sad, R and S werent even at the table and had left prior but they STILL got blamed.  I am a long time NY housewife fan, but lately it's very frustrating to watch as you want to scream "aren't you women watching or in the same footage we're seeing???

kiki13
kiki13

Whatever your problems are- you must have seen the shows now and see that Luann had a man back to the house on vacation!  Why are you not addressing this in your blog and attacking Luann as you so viciously attacked Sonja and Ramona?  Double- standard?  Don't want to alienate another person you might need to use?  This is why no one trusts you now.  You might as well get off this show, b/c one thing Luann said is true- Some things you say, once they are out there, can never be taken back.  You crossed a line over and over and and over. No remorse, no contrition, only excuses. There is no justification for what you did.  Your true colors are out!!

 

BTW- I could MAYBE buy the argument in SB that you were stressed out from flying IF you had not come back to NY and continued your vicious tirades when you were back home- in the luxury and safety of your home.  Even now you don't even acknowledge what really happened- not the things you imagined but what actually happened:

 

1. Luann was the one who said the dynamics would change when you got there- why aren't you lashing out on her?  She also wanted your husband to stay somewhere else.

 

2. Luann was the first and only person to "bring someone home"- besides what business is it of yours????  Also, all the girls were drinking and dancing on the tables.

 

3. No one asked Reid to leave. Are you a dictator who says what people can think about and talk about in a private conversation?  They didn't act on it.  BTW- the dynamic changed dramatically b/c of your big mouth!!!

 

4. You called Sonja and Ramona disgusting names- what if anyone made fun of your disability and/or phobias?  And went around calling you names?

 

5. You made the entire trip about you once you landed- you are one of those people who go around saying "I don't want attention- I'm shy" and then make everything about you 24/7.  You have a none stop need for attention and that everyone should be your needs first above all else.  Guess what?  The world does not work that way.

 

Anytime you decided to have a conversation with Sonja or Ramona, it was based entirely on them apologizing to you!  Neither of them owe you that!!  YOU owe both of them many apologies!!   I sincerely hope you don't return- this show will only go downhill now.

 

Oh yeah one more thing:  Change your tone!

general1318
general1318

On the tv they show at the dinner at St Barths that Your Husband is just as mean and nasty and ruthless as YOU! Calling the Housewives FAT OLD LADIES GONE WILD! When Ladies have a Girls Vacation they Have Fun....As These Ladies Did, till You Came and started VILIFYING SONJA & RAMONA for not kisses your husbands feet, I really hope this is your last season, you are too judgemental and you love talking about yourself entirely too much. BY THE WAY NONE OF THE HOUSEWIVES ARE OLD OR FAT!

knitfrenzy
knitfrenzy

BTW, why is ok to set Sonja up with your father and not Carole?

Carmella84
Carmella84

You're exhausting and you are rude.    Stop preaching to people you fancy yourself superior to.    Don't have your father on the show -  be more protective of him and don't subject people to him.    You have a bad habit of imposing your problems on people to get attention. 

Jean1911
Jean1911

Oh, Bethenny, what have you done to us, foisting this harpy on us? Take Aviva back please. We don't want her.

Jean1911
Jean1911

Shut. Up. Aviva. Get lost already.

ChrisK94
ChrisK94

I wish you and your dad would leave out the trailer talk.  Some of us live in manufactured home parks because we are older, hard-working, middle class people who don't have your family resources.  Think twice, talk less.

Gvmeserenitynow
Gvmeserenitynow

Your best bet would be to apologize completely to Ramonja and save face. You are right it is hard to see someone on a downward spiral like yourself. Do it for yourself and your family.

skye8844
skye8844

Seriously I cannot tolerate your behaviour any more and have chosen to just not watch Housewives of New York when you appear on the screen.  From now on I will consider your appearance intermission  time.  You have been a disaster this season.  Quit the show please.

smedly151
smedly151

Why did you come on the show to judge and condemn?  I think it is wonderful what you do for your charities.  you seem to be wealthy and able.  good for you.  You need to let party people party. and let them be who they are....

brennmkk
brennmkk

Aviva, I don't know why you feel like the housewives should roll out the red carpet for you.  You came off as a real nice, sincere, down to earth person who played neutral to everyone, and now because you have been siding on Ramona all this time, you feel she Owes you , when she doesn't.  You seem like you have this anger built in and exploding while ruining the girls vacation.  The housewives were all getting along and having a great time before you came along.  As you said they should have put up a banner for your presence, wow!, seriously?  You are a mental case. The trip was traumatic for you , then you should not have gone in the first place.  You are not the girls MOTHER HEN, the girls are their own person and have a inner spirit of happiness, too bad you don't.  Why don't you go seek Therapy!

SAC
SAC

Bet you are sorry that you did not listen to Heather about Romona.  Aren't you so glad you defended her in the beginning fo the season?

rjwshasta
rjwshasta

Of course I do not know you personally, but once you forgot the cameras were on, your true self really did show through.  Under all your "Park Avenue pretense",   you're actually a very angry individual.  On one hand, you initially begged to be treated the same as everyone else, but it certainly didn't take long for you to DEMAND special treatment because of your phobias and insecurities.  Which is it Aviva?  For someone with such a storied education you act quite uneducated and especially in the area of social etiquette.  It is also an area in which you clearly will never receive appropriate guidance from a father that is the epitome of social perversion.  Shame on both you and your father for such horrid behaviour. 

Sabisf
Sabisf

No, You would NEVER ask someone to leave your party. You would just insult  them with your vile and vicious words until they would leave on thier own.

Ramona had every right to have you father escorted out when he refused to leave and in fact, owed it to her guest who did not need to experience the inappropriate behavior by your father. It is wrong for a man to insult a woman and put his hands on her in an aggressive way no matter how old he is.

And by the way, Ramona DOES NOT owe you an apology. If anything, you owe her one.

Alph
Alph

Aviva, You are right on point in regards Romona!! Romona Is getting a taste of her own medicine!! Thank you for trying to put her in her place.

Mistress_Citrus
Mistress_Citrus

Mrs. Drescher, You keep acknowledging your behavior and apologizing for it but each week it just seems to escalate. It must be exhausting for you to keep track of everyone who’s slighted you and owes you an apology. You have ANXIETY my dear, not cancer. Anxiety disorder is treatable with medication and therapy but the sufferer must want to get better. Have you tried either? I suffered from it myself for more than four years. During that time in my life, I paid a horrible price. I lost friends and damaged other relationships because I isolated myself from people and life. I was unable to function as a normal person but the difference between you and me is I recognized and freely admitted I was the one with the problem…NOT the other way around. I did not expect people to coddle and enable me. And I certainly wouldn’t expect a party (with a banner) in my honor every time I was able to complete a task that is considered to be a trivial part of life. Were there times I wished family and friends were more sympathetic or understanding of my clinical disease? Absolutely, but again it was MY disorder, not theirs. Beyond the anxiety issues, I find you to be the most judgmental person I’ve ever witnessed. Your fear of heights sure doesn’t keep you from throwing vicious verbal barbs from high atop your ivory tower. I don’t need to recall every outrageous and vile thing you said to Ramona but I will point out that it was especially disturbing when you repeatedly used her age in an attempt to insult and embarrass her. Ageism is a form of bullying and you should only be so lucky to look as fantastic as Ramona does at 56. How ironic it was that you would use your father’s age as a means to garner sympathy for him when he clearly doesn’t conduct himself like any 80 year old I know. And what grown woman recruits her 80 year old father to fight her battles with her women friends? An insecure, unstable, narcissistic woman whose real problem with Ramona seems to be jealousy, that’s who. Yes, Mrs. Drescher, it is crystal clear that you wish you could live your life like Ramona Singer. Ramona embodies the phrase “Live life to the fullest!” She and Sonja Morgan know how to throw caution to the wind, kick up their heels, abandon all worries, live in the moment and have no regrets. Mario is Ramona’s partner, not her crutch. He lives, loves and laughs with her and doesn’t have to constantly manage, attend and reassure her. If you love your husband and your children you will get the help you need. My husband stuck with me because I did seek help. Had I not, I never would have faulted him if he’d left. He did not deserve to be dragged down by my misery which is what will happen to your family if you don’t take the steps to deal with your anxiety disorder. You told Ramona she can’t handle the truth. You couldn’t have made a truer statement about yourself. Hopefully your appearance on this program and the resulting fallout will serve as your own mirror. You are clearly a very unhappy person and that’s a shame because you don’t have to be.

anita388
anita388

I woud like to know who do you think you are and by the way you picked the argumenti St. Barts..you are a bully!!!

missbeulah39
missbeulah39

 @peachykeene I love this comment peachykeene, and you write so eloquently!  I'm jealous :)  You have captured the way Aviva was depicted in a fair and observant manner.  I agree with every point you made re: Aviva.

 

I think Carole is the epitome of grace, and cool with a capitol C, with a wardrobe to match!  Sonja I view as a rather tragic figure, a little too dependent on the kindness of others (Stella!).  But she seems genuinely kind with a good heart. 

 

I wasn't a big fan of Heather until the end of the season but she's grown on me.  I think she's one of those 'either you love her or hate her' people, and I believe that it's because she does 'keep it real'.  Holla!  :)

gabbysmithrn
gabbysmithrn

 @chrisn916 I so completely agree.  The cast this year makes it so boring!!!!  I like Heather but as far as the rest... just do your day jobs!!!

Pettoi
Pettoi

i got your back girl! You are absolutely right!@suse0912

Hutchie
Hutchie

@suse0912 you are so on target and to the point about Aviva calling out Ramona when she wasn't even involved. Aviva is on a witch hunt against Ramona, and the men in the house comments are so right. Aviva claimed that there were all these men in the house and she knew that Sonya had slept with a man from a bar, but she ignored Luann's tryst and Ramona never had anything to do with any man, but said that if she new Aviva was going to bring Reid, that she would have brought Mario. She clearly missed him.

Nonameleft
Nonameleft

 @kiki13 Very nicely put.  I certainly hope Aviva actually reads this!

 

salute
salute

 @general1318

 I am going to Vegas next week with friends without husbands,  I am HAPPY THAT AVIVA IS NOT MY FRIEND,  I will not have her around on my gilrs vacation! I also have a law degree, an MBA and lived in 4 countries. Speak 3 languages and live in the upper east side,  I drink tequila, wine, champagne and gin and like Ramona,  I am happy who I am.

Reganashe
Reganashe

@gabbysmithrn @peachykeene Well said!