Aviva Drescher

Aviva explains her apology to Ramona and Sonja and thinks the ex talk should be put to bed.

on Oct 9, 20120

"Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment." -- Benjamin Franklin.

Sometimes I think that instead of calling our show The Real Housewives of New York City it should be called "Teachable Moments." It has been a learning experience. . .An apology, in my opinion, is putting a relationship and another persons feelings before your own ego. It is about making a wrong right. I take an apology very seriously whether I am giving one or receiving one. An apology propels us forward and enables relationships to evolve, grow, and fosters trust. When I apologize, I mean it through words and by actions. It is not about winning, losing, or keeping score.

Tonight I apologized to Ramona and Sonja for the way I spoke to them in St. Barths. I was wrong to allow my emotions get the best of me. As a result, not only did I hurt people, but my message was lost. I have really learned my lesson and only wish that I had sincerely apologized sooner.

454 comments
Gizmette
Gizmette

Aviva,

I just wanted to tell you that in my opinion Sonja has attacked you repeatedly and for no cause.  Your father did NOT attack her!  She absolutely lied about that.  We all saw on TV how he gently placed his hand on her arm.  From what I have seen on the show, Sonja is a chronic liar and is not to be trusted under any circumstances.  You have apologized more than enough and I would not concern myself with her ever again.

deedot
deedot

You have apologized and I hope the women accept it.  No one is infallable, no one.  The ladies before you, all made mistakes and asked for forgiveness whether they meant it or not.  Stop beating yourself up over what has already been done.  I do think you are a good person and misunderstood at times.

SillyCamille
SillyCamille

The one thing that I respect is that you owned your words and actions. Everyone is human, thinks, feels and react's from their own vantage point which does not always align with everyone else. People make mistakes, people lie, people say things and react out of anger, and regardless of what someone has said or done, they need to own it, good, bad or ugly. I am sure if a camera were to follow me around, for all to see, I would learn some things about myself and possibly face some truths I was not ready to. After watching the Jersey reunion, and then New York, my one wish is that New York could adopt Teresa from Jersey and teach her a thing or two about owning up to what she has done or said...or at least how to create a believable story to make it at least look like she is attempting to own up to it. New York ladies need to take turns being life coaches to some of the Jersey chicks. LOL 

kclindsay
kclindsay

I find it hilarious that Ramona says you need therapy.  She could use a good dose of it herself.  She is the meanest person I have ever seen and then excuses her behavior because she "tells it like it is".  Are you kidding me?  I have never seen anyone act like her in my entire life.  The really unfortunate thing is that you ended up being just as mean.  I think you're better than that. 

This was my first season watching RHONY, and I have to say thank you to all of the housewives for providing me with sometimes jaw dropping entertainment.  I always said to my husband, "I'm going to the other room to watch the crazy lady show."  This is pure guilty-pleasure entertainment.  I certainly wouldn't want to be providing that for the women of America, but please continue...we'll keep watching.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

karynfl
karynfl

Seriously? Using your dead mother as a justification for your mistreatment of others? I sincerely hope you will seek professional help. You are not a nice person and until you take responsibility and own it instead of coming up with ridiculous excuses to blame it on this experience or that from your past you will never change. I hope you won't be back next season.

bookish1503
bookish1503

Aviva,

We ALL make mistakes in life and learn from them.  Don't listen to the haters they are being judgemental and mean.  I believe you are a really good person who makes mistakes like everyone else.  When you are hurt you lash out before thinking about what you really need to say. 

I hope you stay because you are the only one who can make Ra-mean-na squirm.  We've watched her scream and yell for five seasons and make everyone look bad.  It's her turn to take it.  

 

Love ya.

 

nursenj
nursenj

please aviva i agree to be your fan if you agree not to come back next season. do we have a deal?.

ohiofarmgirl
ohiofarmgirl

Aviva, I get it. They get to everyone else too. I do think that overeacted on the st barths trip but I know you get it so there's no need to go on. I like you, your husband and dad together on the show. I just think you might was to stick with Heather, Caroline and Luann-keep ramonja at an arms length and have a good laugh at them. Sometimes crazy old ladies are fun to watch, look how long Golden Girls aired.

jolee1965
jolee1965

Aviva,

I dont know how you except people to know were your coming from if you only tell Carol about your mom.You had a lunch with both Ramona & Sonja why didnt you tell them about your mom then? If my friend told me about her mom, I would have naturally asked if she had shared that with the person/people that were in her line of fire. You really like to put your friends on the spot by "Asking them to push your version of the truth". Carol seems to be a dish rag and excepts a sob story as an excuse for bad behavior.  

Bravofan66
Bravofan66

Thank God you finally were able to show everyone the kind of person you truly are. Instead of having to react to unexpected situations that were beyond your control, you had time to prepare and reflect before the reunion. And you clearly did not want anyone on the show, or in the audience, to see you as that self-absorbed, judgmental snob who appeared in the last episodes of the season. I think there are quite a few of us who were hoping for that too, but sadly, introspection is as far as you got--I guess because that's all about you.Translating that self-awareness into empathy for the other women (over whom you had no control), didn't work out as well--probably because empathy is not all about you.

 

The same old Aviva showed up at the reunion.  y

Vivienne214
Vivienne214

Why do you hold Ramona and Sonja to a different standard than you do for Carole and Heather? Carole and Heather danced on tables in St. Barts and slammed back shots in NYC and you find no issue with them. Yet Ramona and Sonja aren't allowed to party while on vacation? I think you need therapy - my parent was an alcoholic and I don't judge my friends - or use the excuse of 'misplaced anger' for cruel and condescending behavior. You were not enjoyable to watch and I hope you do not return - if you are on season two, I'm out. Had enough of your spoiled, entitled attitude to last a lifetime!

bpster
bpster

One excuse after another after another..........

kipper9
kipper9

Aviva, Just watched part 3 of the reunion.  I think you are the only NY Housewife that has ever put Ramona in her place.  I do like the show, glad to see someone with good intentions in the mix. Carol, and Heather along with you are bringing some interest to the show.  Ramona has been rude consistantly for years, especially to Alex and Simon.  At least you call her on her BS. 

gigilk
gigilk

Aviva, you appear to lack any sense of self-awareness.  Although it seems like you have endured a lot of pain in your life, it is never justified to take your problems out on others.  You should really work on being less nasty.

cehemise
cehemise

And,  liked the inclusion of the Franklin quote, about the temptation of instant gratification.  It seems so very appropriate.

TheTruthNeverLies
TheTruthNeverLies

You truly are delusional and you have issues with everything. Get help or stay away from the general public. The world does not revolve around you. The fact that you said you don't think your nor your fathers behavior was verbally abusive is laughable at  best. It shows you don't really have any sense of self awareness, whatsoever! 

 

You need Jesus.

cehemise
cehemise

You were the bigger person, apologizing on the reunion show.  I respected what you did.  Ramona, however, was, as usual, a pissy little snit.  You do not owe any more apologies for this season.  I do think Ramona creates situations so that she can become a victim and plays the role to the hilt  I would avod her whenever possible.

 

Your father, for all his faults, did not assault her, he took her elbow and she has blown that into WWIII.  She has issues that none of you can fix.  Avoidance is recommended.  Can you imagine inviting houseguests and having one of them take over the dinner party, go into the kitchen and order around your staff?  Inexcusable behavior on her part.  She was an ungracious guest.  I would have been done with her at that point.  I admire that you continued to try with her.  She's like a bull in a china closet, wreaking havoc wherever she goes.

 

You have a lovely husband, children, and life.  You do good works, and move in sophisticated circles  Truly, avoid her.

roby1
roby1

It will be very hard for you to change the opinion of most of the viewers right now. Your actions were harsh this season, and left a bad impression. You can change it if you want to. This was your 1st season and your dealing with some really hard core reality show women. I personally think you will come back from this. Remember being a bitch on this show is good as long as it does not get to personal, and please keep a sense of humor!! Nobody loves a mean girl, and by that I mean take a lesson from Jill Zarin..... Good Luck !!!

wow27
wow27

Dear Aviva,

 

I do think you should have had a celebration waiting for you when you arrived for your vacation!  The whole fireworks display.  Unfortunately  most people do not understand how hard it is to accomplish something that causes so much stress and fear.  The simple task that others take for granted and do not understand the physical challenge involved.  With that said even if there was no celebration due to not understanding.   What happened to simple empathy? 

  With that said I did not know about a lot of your issues at all until you took that vacation.  I did not even know how many fears and anxiety issues you had until you went on the vacation.   So as for you speaking about your anxiety to much I disagree.   Your great! All of you with anxiety and all.   Do not let others affect you so much.  If no one was celebrating you should have had your own celebration without them! 

 Next time make no one's opinion's or actions more important then your own success.  You got on the plane and got there that is worth celebrating.   Also if you make no one's opinion that important you will not be so inclined to get so angry and say things that may hurt someone that does not understand the difficulties. 

Shame on them for a lack of empathy and for your sake let it go all of it you will be better for it!

 

Sorry your father is so beyond appropriate!  You should rip hard at him at least once and let him know there is no excuse for his behavior!

 

Stand up tall and smile!  See you next season!

juka
juka

Please do not subject us to dirty old George any more. He is disgusting.

Judyinmb
Judyinmb

PLEASE get off my TV....forever! Crazy, mean and uninteresting! YUK!

ET137
ET137

I adore you.... you're a stunning jewel of a human being. So what things got a little messy - it was wayyy past time someone set Ramonja straight. The best thing that could happen would be for them to be replaced next season - (they bring the entire network down). Thank you for finding the strength to do the show, please don't let a few haters get you down. Everyone I know thinks you're amazing. I believe you'll have a career long after this gig ends. Oh one request, if I may dear Lady, please let you hubby unbutton his shirts a little. heheh Hugs!

Nanook1
Nanook1

You certainly owed them an apology and hopefully you learned from the teaching moment. You were wrong in Dt. barths & when you stridently backed your father's inappropriate behavior at Ramona's party. If you had been a little less rigid you would have been more right, You are very judgmental and righteous. You were much more likable when you had room in your heart to accept Ramona & Sonja who are easy targets. Even the hidden Carole feels comfortable judging them. Bravo for being honest..

OHCLOONEY
OHCLOONEY

Aviva, I feel so bad for you. The world is turning against you just because you called it like it is!!! You defended Ramona when she didn't get invited to London...then you defended her again and went against the current when LuAnn and boyfriend tried to trick her into saying that her wine was not good. You are loyal and classy and I would love to be your friend!!!!!

SlowAndSteady
SlowAndSteady

You know, in watching what happened it's sadly apparent that Ramona and Sonja bullied and pushed you all season. Every time you tried to talk Ramona (primarily) just talked over you like an ostrich poking her head in the sand. Shes just incapable of seeing herself with any degree of reality. How ironic that she's on reality tv. Even when you talked about your mother dying of complications from alcohol she was stifling a smile. She was incapable of taking any comments from Andy (finally Andy!) - heaven forbid she face herself in a mirror. She's just disgusting. I think you finally lashed out, but to your credit you were self-aware enough at least to admit it. Bravo to you. Growth isn't always pretty, but it's real. You're getting a hell of a lot more out of your life than Ramona.

Steph1684
Steph1684

I honestly feel like you are too hard on Ramona for her asking your father to leave her fundraiser. She asked him many times not to get involved in the argument as he wasn't there and he continued with her. Finally she asked him to leave and when he wouldn't, after he grabbed her arm, she had him escorted out. I feel she was very nice to him for as long as she could be. I don't like any of you more than the other, so it's not that I just agree with what she does, but in this situation, that is how I feel. 

april-jennifer
april-jennifer

I cant help but feel bad for you. I mean i am not a fan of yours after this season, but geez people hate on you like you kicked a puppy! just stick to what you said, change yourself, keep your promises, and never EVER have a tantrum on national tv because people didn't throw a party for you for riding a plane.  America will eventually forgive you. probably...

and please keep your father off of the show. best thing for both of you.

Whatnow
Whatnow

Aviva, I think you are wonderful and I hope you will continue to be a part of the show. In my opinion, you we're expecting too much from Ramona and Sonja. They are not at your level and are not mature enough to understand where you are coming from. It is unfortunate that you allowed yourself to care about the two of them. I believe you realize this when you apologized at the reunion. Don't waste your time and energy trying to get through to them.

OneEyedFlurry
OneEyedFlurry

Aviiiiiiiiiiiva!!!!  You are a wonderful person who has explained yourself eloquently and articulately in your blogs, so you owe no more apolgies to anyone.  I, for one, truly appreciate that you took the time and had the guts to do the self-analysis that you did as each week's episode aired, and I hope you know that it was a true benefit to my mom (not me 'cause I'm a perfect dog).  In my Dog House we adore you, and we're always here for you.We keep you in our thoughts and prayers and appreciate you for your candor.  Although the gang jumped on you when you mentioned Vassar and law school and all of your other comments (in a way that diminished them) I hope you NEVER LOSE SIGHT OF WHAT AN INSPIRATION YOU ARE!!!  I am so proud of you and happy to know you, and you can rest assured that you inspire all of us here in my house.

We've got ya back, Sistah.  We are excited for the growth you and your sweet dad may have experienced by doing the program, we're really looking forward to seeing you on next season's edition, and we hope to see you down there in NYC when we take a little road trip in November.

 

Thanks for adding so much to this franchise!  We adore you and Reid, your kids, and your sweet dad.Love, OEF

janicemw
janicemw

hating to offer an opinion because you do seem to have a good heart and intentions... but it was really confusing to watch you accept your fathers comments and 'adult rated' behavior, towards your new friends but particularly when it includes comments about you (!) and then watch you beat up the same new friends over  'adult rated' behavior in an adult setting .

Hubbchick
Hubbchick

Heather said it best "Ad Nauseum" 

Eliza_linglee
Eliza_linglee

Aaaghh! Aviva, I know you mean well but it is just coming out all wrong.  I empathize with you tremendously after hearing your description of the accident that has left you psychologically scarred.  You need to work on diminishing this horrid memory maybe hypnosis I don't know. Your phobias have definitely taken a toll on the relationships you have with the other ladies.  I just think they are fed-up of hearing about it quite honestly and I know that this can hurt but you MUST try harder to find topics of conversation that do not revolve around this tragedy. You have to be careful of the words you use Aviva, once said you can never take them back, people will always remember the bad before the good. It is sad but you have done some irreparable damage to these relationships with Sonja and Ramona. However, I will say that when you were telling your story of the accident these two ladies felt something in their heart, I could see it in their eyes.  So…how to heal friendships?  Well…time is needed first and foremost and then an act that is selfless for that friend.  However, one must first always ask oneself if they truly valued the friendship that has been lost, or if they could care less.

pyin
pyin

Hang in there Aviva, I see the good person that you are. I cannot believe how many people have turned on you.

pyin
pyin

You know what Aviva, Ramona is constantly bragging about herself because she is not afraid to say what everyone else is thinking. Why is it okay for Ramona to constantly run her inappropriate mouth continually, but how dare you do it??? If you look at her history on the show she is the constant center of conflict because she is a sloppy drunk. I say GOOD FOR YOU! They were acting like white trash!! I don't care how much money they have!! They are both a train wreck! You are much more classy. Yeah, maybe you came unhinged but I would have loved to be there to tell Ramona how ignorant and self-righteous she is all of the time!! That is the only reason they keep her on the show, because she creates conflict.She thinks of no one but herself and then plays the victim if anyone EVER says anything to her. I am not a bored housewife with nothing to do and I have experience with alcoholics, and Ramona most definetely is one! She is always inappropriate, but again why is that okay for her and no one else. She is NOT a nice person and only sees things one way... HER way. I don't think you owed an apology!!

DIANE55668
DIANE55668

Unbelievable! Who do you think you are? A banner? No way! You think you're entitled because of you unfortunate accident. Wake up lady! Watch the last few episodes over and over again, maybe it will hit you. 

MRWC
MRWC

You seem spoiled and stuck up.  The only person who owed Reid a thanks you was you.  And the reward for getting on a plane... you're in St. Barts.  I think the way Ramona and Sonja treat Heather is super annoying but they are right on about you.  Many people have terrible tragedies, it's not an excuse to lash out in the most rude way possible whenever you feel like it.  It wasn't exactly in the heat of the moment either.  You were standing there like a maniac watching Sonja flirt with that guy, rolling your eyes and waiting to pounce.  Plus, you had follow up lunches... please.

Aharman
Aharman

Aviva, I was shocked to learn from Ramona at the reunion that, during the airing of the show, you were STILL berating her with your tweets, etc., even though St. Barths happened months ago! How sincere can your apology be when, up until the reunion, you continued to perpetuate this nasty behavior of yours? I think your apology only comes as a result of the backlash you have received from viewers, and the fear that Bravo will give you the boot. How could you watch the show and not see that it was LUANN that said the "dynamics would change," yet you haven't spewed ANY of your venom at HER - why not? How were you not able to see that Ramona was very sweet and kind to your father, even as he continued to follow her around and do your dirty work? It was only after he grabbed her arm that she finally had enough and asked him to be escorted out. Can you blame her? She's a victim of abuse and extremely sensitive to anyone forcing themselves on her, yet you, with all your own life changing experiences, showed not one ounce of empathy. I think what could have been a wonderful experience for you and the other ladies was dashed by your selfish arrogance. I liked you very much at the beginning of the season, but can't bear the thought of watching you through another. Your time would be better spent finding suitable help for your anxieties and taking care of your lovely children. Should you come back, I hope it will be with humility and a more positive attitude.

CookieCookie
CookieCookie

 @SillyCamille Ug. I cannot even watch the RHONJ anymore. Not one of those women is remotely likable or interesting.

CookieCookie
CookieCookie

 @karynfl I agree with you. Aviva will use anyone and anything to deflect from her own self-control issues. She's just mean. No one to blame but herself. End of.

SuzieZee
SuzieZee

@ET137 stop lying. And no one wants to see Reid unbutton his shirt. " heheh" sounds lecherous, not sexy.

nursenj
nursenj

 @pyin

 sorry no turning here, never liked her from day one. fake fake fake and self absorbed mean girl. if not for the strenght in me her voice is enough to send me over the edge.

itsjustme123
itsjustme123

 @pyin RHONY fans don't like Aviva because she's channeling Jill Zarin... and you know what happened to Jill....

CookieCookie
CookieCookie

 @pyin Turned on her? It's her first season on RHONY, and these are our first impressions.

nursenj
nursenj

 @pyin

 i truly believe you are aviva, her inappropriate father or  godlike husband. her only fans by the way. 

OKWHATEVER
OKWHATEVER

Pyin,  I am sorry you feel that way.  I just have to think that you need to open your mind and realize that both Aviva and Ramona are crazy, and that is what makes them real.  Everything you say about Ramona, holds true with Aviva except, the "drunk" part!   They are of the same mold. Thus, this is why they don't get along!  You need to watch the show.  Ramona is not as bad as you think.

 

jellybean818
jellybean818

 @MRWC And who can forget how she stormed into Ramona and Sonja's room after listening at the door.  She doesn't just listen at the door like a normal person and walk away, she comes in not caring that she was just snooping. 

theresa.b.burgess
theresa.b.burgess

 @AharmanHave you seen those tweets for yourself? "To learn from Ramona" isn't exactly an unbiased source now, is it? Did you see Ramona's ridiculously over-dramatic re-enactment of the "attack" on her by George? I was howling with laughter! Ramona is a bully and a crybaby. She likes to get her licks in, but sure can't take it.

 

 

kipper9
kipper9

Yeah, like you would have to be standing at the door to hear Ramona's voice?? Unless you have hearing issues you would hear Ramona from a mile away.

karynfl
karynfl

 @theresa.b.burgess  @Aharman George's behavior toward Ramona was demanding, controlling and unwelcomed. Following her around to demand an apology for his daughter was outright harassment. Crossing the line from verbal and emotional accosting to unwanted, unfriendly and aggressive physical assault is intolerable and indefensible. Dismissive attitudes and downplaying this type of abuse condones it and it is disgusting. That is why domestic abuse and violence against women is prevalent in our society. It isn't a laughing matter and it is not a joke. Especially to the victim. Hooray for Ramona for being a woman strong enough to stand up for herself against George's manipulative and intimidating tactics.

jolee1965
jolee1965

 @theresa.b.burgess  @Aharman 

But in Ramona's defense and im not her biggest fan. I think she was overly dramatic because she was tired of Carol sticking up for Aviva. Carol she seems to be drawn toward Aviva out of pitty.