Aviva Drescher

Aviva explains her Secret Santa gift, what she looks for in a friend, and why the wine debacle needs to end.

on Aug 13, 20120

It is the night of Carole's dinner party and after a busy day I called Reid to ask him to pick up a Secret Santa gift on his way home from the office. He replied, "Sure thing honey. Consider it done." He bought a lizard. When we got in the car to dinner Reid started to explain that the box was prepared by a Petco expert with the lid cracked open and lots of air holes everywhere. He was very concerned about the lizard's well being while I was afraid of who would receive the reptile. Thank goodness Carole got it! She was so elegant calm and collected. She named him George. Mmmmmm. Speaking of, my dad entertained us all that evening. He was, as usual, inappropriate but hilarious.

So let's get this straight. I am in Carole's apartment having M&Ms for lunch when Carole invites us to St. Barths to celebrate her book completion and meet up with her boyfriend who is performing there. While at first this seems like fun, soon the fear sets in. Not only is there a big plane and a little plane involved, but I had recently counseled an amputee who lost her leg in St. Barths and nearly died. I just wasn't feeling it. I went rambling on to get out of this trip anyway possible.

The good news is that while I rarely show my vulnerabilities, it seems that these women are supportive and really want to help me get over this. Right? I started to fantasize about taking that little teeny car size plane into St. Barths and upon arrival the ladies are high fiving me and congratulating me on fighting my fears. Support, acceptance, patience, and empowerment.. What are friends for? Right?

And then there were snakes. Why did I reference exposure therapy with snakes? Because beneath the surface of all this hand holding and support, I sensed several hedonistic women who would later forget this gathering, lose any sense of compassion and kindness, and prioritize themselves and superficiality above all else.

165 comments
LisaRose
LisaRose

Aviva, I'm sorry to say, but you're two face.

daustin
daustin

First of all, YOU are the one who keeps bringing up the wine debacle. Second of all, you are a troublemaker, a talker behind the back, a pot stirrer, nobody's real friend. Exactly like Ramona, just quieter and sneakier and I'll give you smarter, too. But, I never know where you're coming from. I never know who you really consider a friend. I can't decide whether you are a good addition to the show or not. You confuse me on many levels.

jmos1234
jmos1234

Seriously people, maybe we need to lighten up here.

Let's remember that these women have private lives and not everything happens in front of the camera. Add to that the fact that not everyone wants to confront someone in front of millions of viewers.

I would have liked to have seen and heard Aviva tell Ramona to mind her own business and STFU about the leg already, but maybe that wasn't something she was comfortable doing on camera. 

I would have said to Ramona, "If you want to get out that's fine, but I'm fine here in the water. Get a glass of wine and leave me alone." (All right, I admit I probably would have thrown a few extra expletives in there too.) Aviva didn't do that and that was her choice. 

She's a woman with a disability on national TV. She's not the savior of all amputees everywhere. She's been very upfront about her quirks. I'd say she's shown a lot of courage so far.

@dancingintheRain
@dancingintheRain

I just wanted to say I too am a person who lives with a disability. For Ramona to treat you like she did in Miami about getting out of the pool because of your leg & THEN you had to go to Sonja & Carole for help to deal with Ramona & THEN you get onto Heather for saying Ramona was crazy in front of Mario, sorry Aviva, you may be a lady born & raised in New York City & never to be underestimated, you failed the test! You are a huge disappointment to those of us with disabilities. You lost a HUGE opportunity!! 

Drshilodlenfant
Drshilodlenfant

I thought the same thing about Sonja giving marital advice!? I too love my husband dearly and hate being separated from him-- it's just not very fun with out him! Plus I hate flying, so I'm with you there. Now, onto Ramona. She is TOXIC and it seems that on the show you started out chummy with her, but are quickly seeing her true colors. You were so good to put up with her rudeness for so long, I don't know how you stayed so calm and collected when she was being so overtly inappropriate. Not sure why you chose to defend her with the wine thing with Jaques and Luann, after she treated you so poorly. But I love how your willing to reflect and admit when you made a few missteps. None of us are perfect, and if we all had a camera crew following our every move, it would capture our mistakes too. Way to go. I think you're a fabulous addition to the show, and really are a likable woman who is to be admired. 

ChrisK94
ChrisK94

I hope you can lighten up.  Right now, you remind me of Alex McCord.  She did not make it on the show because she and her husband were too "clubby" and serious.  It was not fun to watch.  I hope you are not cast as her replacement, because that is a losing proposition.

Unbearable
Unbearable

Aviva, I totally understand your point of view. I'm so sorry, you had to endure something so awful. Of course it would leave an emotional scar. How would it not? Your an amazing lady! Your very very smart, and successful. Ramona wouldn't know what she's looking at, but I suspect Manhattan knows what they see when they look at Ramona.... And at Aviva Drescher!

jmos1234
jmos1234

Has anyone read the blog?  I do believe that Aviva has already admitted that she was wrong to bring up the wine situation, to tease Jacques, and and a slew of other things.

 

Horse is dead. Nothing to see here, move on.

Suzanne7272
Suzanne7272

Aviva needs to mind her own business and stop trying to come to Ramona's rescue, Ramona is crazy enough to fight her own battles. And honestly Aviva is starting to look just as crazy! She's already on my nerves

gulfcoastgirl1
gulfcoastgirl1

I just don't get you.  You allow people to viciously tear apart Jacques after he leaves, then have the nerve to tell Heather, who defends her friends who have just left and can't defend themselves, that she is indefensible.  Ridiculous!  News flash:  Ramona is crazy!  I don't think it is mean to say that at this point, just an obvious fact.  I have a feeling from the previews that you will regret siding with the "crazies" versus the normal girls in the episodes to come.

jcavchn
jcavchn

Honestly, if there weren't Aviva's asking the questions to get the drama going , Sonja's sexual innuendos and playing both sides, Ramona's VERY ODD personality, Heathers smile with "whateverthehell" attitude, LuAnne's um......singing? And Caroles wit we really wouldn't be watching this show.

Clara1230
Clara1230

you were one of my favorites, not anymore after the last episode.  You are coming across as a woman with questionable agendas, or maybe you are trying to hard to stand out among the group of strong women.  Your father is great, but he stops being charming after a while.  You both need to turn down the volume to be tolerable.

Robyn-rlm
Robyn-rlm

Glad your on the show, but I am sure we will all see your fall out with Ramona soon.  I love it on the preview clips where you call Ramona and Sonja "white trash"!  Can't wait to see that show!

lesajackson575
lesajackson575

Aviva... Just read your blog... I want to start out by saying I really want to like you on the show, but it seems you do have a tendency to want to gossip and talk bad about people behind their backs, yet very rarely stand up for anyone whom Ramona is talking about. Yet I have seen you defend Ramona! What's up with that? You talk bad about her and everyone else... than defend her almost in the same breath... the whole wine thing... yes you should have dropped it! It seems like as long as the heat is off you, you will throw anyone under the bus to keep Ramona off you! You apparently are not true friends with anyone on the show, obviously your only friend is your husband and you know, that's cool too. I think you need to stand up for yourself and also for the other woman when you know good and well Ramona is wrong... and CRAZY! Heather is the only one who will tell it like it is, she seems to be a straight shooter and if you are going to align yourself with anyone on the show... I suggest you align yourself with Heather, Not Ramona... but than again... you may want to continue to be the fence rider and talk about everyone and have no real sense of who you are or what you stand for! Just sayin.... As for your dad... good thing you love him and can forgive his classless act, it's not funny, attractive or anything else. I felt sorry "sort of" for Sonja... but not really, She seems to be a gold digger, panhandler and looking for a sugardaddy...  He really brings nothing to the show and I don't find him funny! It's rather sad...

Diane69802
Diane69802

Ramona is Crazy out of control!  She appears to be extremely jealous of Heather and really of anyone who is friends with Sonja.  What ever happened to the "renewal of Ramona"  if this is it...she needs to hit reset!  She was so rude at the pool doing face yoga I was embarrased for her.  What business is it of her to even discuss your leg?  You aren't a child and she was treating you like one, it was painful to watch....why didn't someone tell her to stop!

 

mm811
mm811

Aviva - you were the WORST on the show this episode.  Its NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS about Luann and Ramona's wine situation, so stay out.  

 

And I'm sooo glad Heather called you out about mocking Jaques as soon as he left the party.  You were caught on camera calling him mean, so why deny it?  

 

You were the epitome of two-faced this episode.  

LaydeeDiana
LaydeeDiana

Sorry Aviva, but your father in NOT hilarious. He's embarrassing, crude, and creepy. You are not doing him any favors by having him featured on the show.

julia.sheets.3
julia.sheets.3

Aviva, i really like you; and have enjoyed you on this season.  I really like your personal style, your kids are super cute; and your family is so nice.   Your dad is so funny...there's one in every family right????   Sorry to hear about your mother's passing, it is so inspiring how long your parents were married.  You are very genuine and present yourself with character and grace.  Being a nerdy stay at home mom from rural Ohio,  I expect wealthy NewYorkers'  to have a little class (at least more than me anyways).  However, more times than not, recently, it seems to be the exception rather that the norm on Bravo's Housewives series for the women to be down right abnouxious.  I still like most of them, I just think they would be a little more refined.  Anyways..so far you have been very refreshing..thank you for sharing your life and story.

Barbarajean
Barbarajean

Aviva, So nice to see that you finally have figured out Ramona and Sonja. I will admit I was giving Sonja a little bit more rope hoping she wouldn't hang herself but she  disappointed me. She is so into herself and expects somthing for nothing all the time. This is a bankrupt woman who thinks se should associate with the elite. Get a clue. I'm sorry Aviva that you have so much to deal with since you were young but I believe the good Lord will get you through anything. Thank goodness for your wondeful husband and loving children. You are truly blessed.

LadyNitch
LadyNitch

Let me start off by saying you are a strong amazing person. To have gone thru what you have in your past and the everyday struggles you still face, to have the courage to do this is Empowering. I wish you, Reid, Heather, and everyone else the best of luck with Ramona. I am glad I don't have friends like that anymore in my life. Wishing you all the Best. One of your newest fans, Nichelle Coe

grannypl6
grannypl6

Where in any gift giving guide is it acceptable to give a lizard as a gift to middle aged ladies? Seriously? these are not 6 year old boys. Ridiculous.

And if you want to get over the wine thing, stay out of it, not your business and we are tired of hearing about it. Time to move on. 

But I must agree, Ramona uses your disability to her advantage. I think you are handling that situation with grace and dignity

jmos1234
jmos1234

Hello Aviva,

 

I am so glad that you are strong enough to openly admit your mistakes and vulnerabilities. I respect that so much.

 

I truly don't think that Ramona will ever not be about Ramona. Sonja doesn't know how to tell Ramona to back off - she just ignores her and moves on. Heather, Luann, and Carole seem to be your best allies in that group.

 

It can't be easy to live your life under a microscope, such as this show is. 

Thank you

sharonkaye
sharonkaye

I hope this doesn't come out wrong, but I think Aviva might just be a lil too sheltered for this show....hanging with Ramona and/or sonJa is going to be like hanging out with 2 really old 15 year mentality in the head, women....ummmmmm

LuAnn and sonJa seem to like to rub your face in their "harry" escapades...I just don't understand you wanting this experience, but you seem like a fish out of water.

 

proud of your bravery tho...I wouldn't do it ;0

BarbarainNY
BarbarainNY

Aviva, I *do* understand a person who feels real anxiety. Please do *not* take advice from LuAnn or from any other 'Housewife' who seeks to inform you how to confront your fears. They are not mental health professionals. They're just people running their mouths.

From the conversation I heard at Carole's lunch party, it seemed as if they confused any typical little fear -- meaning a little nervousness -- with a real anxiety such as yours which arose from a childhood trauma. You feared for your very life.

Don't be wishy-washy about the decision. Just decide. If you do not want to go on the trip, then stay home. It's okay; it truly is okay. Be comfortable with your decision.

mizrosy
mizrosy

Aviva along with everyone else I am truly sorry for the trauma that you suffered as a child.   Aviva ... you started out being one of my favorites but not any longer.  I just do not understand you.  Why are you fighting other battles and cannot fight your own?  You seek out others to speak up for you regarding Ramona but you will not speak up to her and defend yourself.  If you still had an issue with LuAnn about the wine tasting why didn't you meet with her one-on-one and discuss it with her? Instead you waited for a social gathering where there would be others involved to back you up.  Regarding Jacques being french ... well, accept the fact that he is and speaks the language ... Ramona and Mario questioned his accent in Miami and again at the party ... then you commented that you called him mean in french and he never commented.  Did it occur to you that he may have been ignoring you.  And then all of you talked about him behind his back as they departed the party. You stated the Heather did not have the right to say Ramona was crazy ... did you ever tell Ramona that she did not have the right to call Heather a liar?  Ramona started the name game. Please do not expose your charming husband to a girls trip.  Thank you for apologizing.  

happyinlondon
happyinlondon

I think the problem might be insecurity here, again. You might be afraid of being too nice, and try to stir things up for being more interesting. That does not work, be who you are Aviva, you are a nice person. You really need not to stir things up in order to compensate the fact that you are not in the "clique". The show is complete high school bullying. 

Rita-la
Rita-la

Aviva, please use your powers for good, not evil!

DonnaAnnJohnson
DonnaAnnJohnson

I think you are trying too hard to be perfect in front of the camera, if you relax a little the newbies will completely take over! Love you all! Including your Dad! As far as your issues, take one moment at a time and stay calm and carry on! Look forward to next week! xoxo

susan.m.carter.90
susan.m.carter.90

The trip to St. Bart's is not a "girls' trip".  It's Carole's trip to meet up with her boyfriend, to celebrate the completion of her manuscript. She invited her friends to "tag along", and Carole has no problem with Reid coming.

If I had 4 small children, an awesome husband of only 5 years, and an opportunity to go to St. Bart's, for sure my husband would come with me.

Pleiades333
Pleiades333

Sorry got to agree you weren't born with a silver spoon in your mouth...you were born with it in you hand...always stirring the pot...trouble maker

MonicaTX
MonicaTX

Uh...did you even watch yourself in the show?  Was it a pod person moment for you?  Because girlfriend, in your blog you are talking a whole different story then one you acted out for the camera.    You were so forceful and adamant about going after Jacques, LuAnn and then even Heather!!    But now.....you are painting yourself in a whole different light, ignoring how weird and atrocious you were behaving. 

 

I was liking you at first, but the last few episodes you are beginning to get really old and really tired with the way you talk out of all sides of your mouth. 

theresa_tds
theresa_tds

I am genuinely surprised at how often have instigated conflict over the past couple of episodes -- Heather called Ramona's behavior 'crazy' -- not Ramona crazy, and indeed Ramona's behavior is 'crazy'.  Up until now I have had a soft spot for her but am beginning to dread her appearances. Your behavior after Jacques left was straight out of high school, mean girl 101.  Unfortunately your feelings toward Jacques in this post ring shallow as your behavior was so egregious.  Too bad, you have an amazing platform to show the world that yes, folks with disabilities are just like everyone else, I just wasn't expecting it to be of a fearful mean girl.  

redial@7
redial@7

Aviva I feel so bad for you and the problems you tackle with getting on an airplane.  I sure hope you can find some help with this so you can travel with your friends and feel comfortable.  The only thing I do not like this season with the Housewives of New York is your father.  I don't find him funny and his sexual remarks are absolutely horrible. 

JaneKat
JaneKat

Sorry but I don't agree with you. Aviva seems to be a very sweet person and facing down Ramona (who is a very strong and overbearing person) would be very difficult for her. She was asking for advice on how to deal with Ramona from Sonja because Sonja knows how to deal with her. She also should have gotten on Heather's case for calling Ramona crazy in front of her husband. Heather needs to be put in her place (as well as Ramona). Aviva feels more comfortable in dealing with Heather than with Ramona, obviously. Ramona is a "loose cannon." Also - speaking as a person with disabilities - there is no one way a person with disabilities "should" act. I don't recall a "manual" ever coming out.

JaneKat
JaneKat

Aviva and Carole are my favorites on this show. I would say Aviva is the most attractive also. Love ya, Aviva!

misg12
misg12

 @jmos1234  Seriously!!  Too funny, I was just thinking the same thing.  I was all ready to give her my two cents on her behavior and then I read her blog...she obviously sees what she did wrong.  

JaneKat
JaneKat

Everyone has different opinions on who to side with and who not to. I happen to agree with Aviva - Luann and Heather were pretty awful to Ramona - they were being bullies. I'm not a big fan of Ramona's either, however, and it looks like Aviva is realizing that Ramona is a problem too.

Lynda58
Lynda58

 @gulfcoastgirl1 I completely agree with you.  Aviva has hitched her wagon to the wrong star.  

Beyoncca
Beyoncca

 @sharonkaye

 Not LuAnn so much, she always has an uneasy expression when Harry's mentioned. Sonja on the other hands can barely contain her excitement.

Eva18
Eva18

 @Milica

 

Oh, Lord.

 

Is there any one of you who doesn’t understand that these women are pressured by production to ask loaded questions and stir the pot?

Beckymgrey
Beckymgrey

 @theresa_tds No Heather said to Mario "Your wife is crazy!" That's not acceptable. Just as if Ramona went up to Heather's husband and out of frustration said "Your wife is a liar." Whether either statement is true is moot, it's not acceptable. 

What I like about Heather's husband is that I can't remember his name. He is in the necessary scenes and that is it. Reid is only dragged in by his neurotic wife. I love him too!

grannypl6
grannypl6

 @redial@7 I so agree with you. I find him gross and disgusting and he has no business being on the show

@dancingintheRain
@dancingintheRain

 @JaneKat Aviva's newest post about tonight's episode is EXACTLY what i was talking about in my statement about Ramona & the pool incident. A woman strong enough to stand up & help organize this charity for kids is a very strong lady! Many thanks goes to you Aviva!!! Then, in the dinner tonight she sure didn't have a problem unloading on Ramona & Sonja for not coming out to help her charity. As jamos1234 said, "If you want to get out of the water that's fine, but I'm fine here in the water. Get a glass of wine & leave me alone." That's all I was talking about, just stand up for yourself, disabled or not!! No, a manual on dealing with persons who are disabled has never come out & every person living with a disability has every right to deal with it the best way that is best for him/her. I just think there are some very conflicting statements coming from Aviva, & they come depending which "housewife" she's talking to at the moment. It's beginning to get interesting, & as Heather said you may not want to get to close to that fire or you may just get burned!!   

jmos1234
jmos1234

 @Beckymgrey No, with all due respect Heather did not say, "Your wife is crazy!"  She said, "... and now your crazy wife is over there..." The she corrected what she said after Aviva spoke, "Well, she's acting crazy..."I just watched it so that I could be certain. That's a clue as to how things get so twisted like a game of Telephone - especially if Ramona is listening.

The video is:

http://bravo.ly/TCMMVT

jmos1234
jmos1234

 @BeckymgreyYou're welcome. I posted the link to the tape (or at least the web address for it.) :-D

You say Heather said, "Your crazy wife is..."

I said Heather said, "Now your crazy wife is...."

 

That's close enough for me.

It was a heated emotional moment. Ramona doesn't need any help being driven crazy - she owns a fleet of crazy already.

 

Okay - the need for a good pun got the best of me.

Rita-la
Rita-la

 @Beckymgrey  @jmos1234 Or maybe she just has the ability to correct her behavior when she realizes she went over the line. It would be nice to see a little self-reflection from Ramona.

Beckymgrey
Beckymgrey

 @jmos1234  I love the way you're so respectful. I appreciate that. Believe it when people say that it is the small things that mean a lot to people. :)

Now....

Please review the tape. Heather says to Mario. "Your crazy wife is..." When Mario asked Heather to clarify what she said, Heather then says "Well your wife was acting all crazy.." She knew that she stepped over the line a little bit and then rephrased what she had said.

That's was bugs me about Heather. For all the "in your face" Heather is , she will back peddle when she realizes how she comes across. I think that's what drives Ramona...crazier. Because Heather is so purposeful in her statements (because she is a business person), it's obvious she gives different versions to different people it reeks of duplicity. Sonja does the a similar thing but she's just a fence sitter and does it to get the most out of people. (manipulator)

Rita-la
Rita-la

 @jmos1234 That's what I remembered too. It was understandable given that Ramona had just done a hit and run, walked away and then turned back and yelled again, such that Mario and others were wondering what was happening NOW.