Hustle and Flow
There’s no time to cry about dead lizards, though, when there are buns in the toaster oven. Where's the head on that torso? And where's Sonja?
I'm glad I finally got to see this photo shoot, I'd been hearing about it for months. This is the photo shoot that launched a thousand fights, an infamous battle of the Toaster Oven Wars. This photo shoot, in fact, is a continuous source of friction until the very last day, and last moment we filmed. Don't ask, I can't tell.
We're always encouraged in these sorts of disputes to "take a side." Usually my side is, "I don't take sides when two grown women are fighting." But after seeing the photo shoot caper I will come clearly down on the side of Heather.
Heather is an expert in branding. She holds 11 patents from the United States government. Do you know how hard it is to get anything from the United States government? She is an expert in getting her message out. We spent the first month of the series talking about how much Heather talked about Yummie Tummie (behind her back, naturally.) She knows what she's doing.
Heather knows what she's doing, Big Guns knows what he's doing. Sonja is late. She's worried Big Guns is late. Sonja must have asked for Big Guns 300 times. Sonja doesn't seem like a business woman, Sonja's a character. Sonja's a lot of things. For the life of me, though, I don't understand her obsession with toaster ovens. Show me one that can prepare the meal then cook and clean itself, and I'm listening.
Toaster oven or not, Lady Morgan knows how to pose. She's like a golden age movie star. She steps in front of the camera and blooms like a tropical flower. It's not easy to hold a pose like she does. I’ve tried to make her "sexy face" but end up looking like I've just smelled bad fish. That face and perfectly curved mouth should be posed in front of cameras all day, it could sell anything. Anything but toaster ovens.