Cast Blog: #RHONY

No Excuses

Heather wishes everyone wasn't so filled with excuses this week, herself included.

No excuses. . .

Calling a man's wife crazy was probably not the best approach but initially Mario didn't seem to disagree that Ramona was acting irrational. And in light of her behavior, I think crazy wasn't far off the mark. Ramona should be fighting her own "bottles," but instead of facing her issues she's dropping bombs and then and running off, like always, and I am left to face Mario now. At least, Carole seems to agree with me.

And Aviva? What's with Aviva? Is her attack on me a way of changing the subject? Come on ladies, I am right about Jacques. Reid is defending me while Aviva is defending Mario? And why is she is still talking about London? LuAnn and I were excluded from Miami and we don't feel wronged. Enough is enough. Aviva and I definitely aren't on the same page all of the time, but at the end of the evening, we realize together that this really isn't about us and we decide to let it go.

Despite the fact that Aviva frustrates me at times, I do admire her and care for her. I arrived really late to her charity event at SoulCycle -- but not because I was angry at her or holding a grudge. I honestly am not. I was just held up at Yummie in a meeting I could not reschedule. You have to understand getting around in the city can be insane and you really need to allow yourself at least 30 or 40 minutes to make any appointment on time. Unfortunately, my meeting didn't afford me this luxury. I knew it would be a tight squeeze, but thankfully I got there just in the nick of time to be counted and support this great cause.

Aviva discusses openly about the fact that she suffers from panic disorders, which can be traced back to her accident as a child. I've told her that she is the calmest panicked person I have ever met. She is so smooth about her phobias that you really never see her sweat. But, when she talks going to St. Barth's without Reid, as I've said before, you can actually feel the panicked energy in the air around her. This is really stressing her out and I feel bad for her. I can only imagine how debilitating a disorder like this would be. It is clear that Reid really is her rock.

Later, Aviva and I planned an outing with our families and I thought it would be nice for us to have a stress-free afternoon together. I care for Aviva, and, like I said, the fight we had wasn't really about us after all. Reid seems to see what I see and he understands me more than Aviva does lately. I look forward to spending some time with the Dreschers. I do think Aviva is just having a momentary lapse of sanity with regard to Ramona and honestly hasn't everyone admitted Ramona can be crazy? She really is just too much! I only hope she's not contagious and is spreading her crazy to my friends!?

Flash to our playdate and there is that Hudson Drescher -- how precious is he?!? I just died when he said he didn't want to ride the merry-go-round because it would shake his penis all over. That is one of those moments during filming when everyone just falls out laughing! It was hysterical and precious at the same time and thanks to RHONY Viv and Reid forever have it on tape. My sweet little ones too!!!! It was a great day.And speaking of great days. . .I have no words for the children Aviva works with. Seeing that little boy with his new running blade prosthetics left me speechless. I cried throughout that scene. Happy tears. I get extremely moved by how bittersweet life can be. . .so beautiful. Aviva had invited me to this and we had planned that I would bring Jax along. He and Aviva have developed a special bond based on their struggles and I love it. She can talk to him about things from a place I cannot and she takes it very seriously and as a "responsibility." She loves Jax that much more for it. And I love her right back for it. Unfortunately, scheduling conflicts prevented me from attending this special day, but I loved watching it on TV along with you all. What a beautiful scene and how much do I admire Aviva for giving back the way she does. She is such an amazing role model for these little ones. Everyone is over-scheduled but this is one thing I was so very sad to miss. No excuses.

It feels like this episode was full of excuses. . .excuses for saying the wrong thing, excuses for not showing up to support a friend, excuses for not being able to travel, so many excuses! Some of them justified and others maybe not so much. We all have our reasons but wouldn’t it be nice if we didn't need them?

As always, thank you for all of your support and feedback. You make being on the show so rewarding for me. To learn more about me and my shapewear, go to Facebook,, and You can also enjoy 10 percent off your next Yummie Tummie order by entering code "iloveheathert10" at checkout. And please don't forget to follow me on Twitter (@iamHeatherT) and to visit to sign up to become an organ and tissue donor.

Xx Heather

Dorinda: Let Ramona be Ramona

Dorinda opens up on her relationship with John and tells us what she thought of being in the middle of brunchgate. 

This episode was draining. So much happening, too, it’s exhausting.

I know everyone was thinking it was literally a battle of two brunches. Let me clear with this: It was a classic power struggle with two grown women with big personalities staking their territory. Listen, there was a bit of the tension before everyone met up at Luann’s, and it all came to a head. I personally had no skin in this game, but for some reason, I was clearly positioned as a talking point and negotiating tool. Whatever…it’s all good.

Brunch was awkward, to say the least. I was hoping all the girls would show up, so we would have a chance to really get to know one another before I left for the city, but the fact that they didn't neither ruined nor altered my plans. Thank you, Ramona, for a wonderful weekend, and thank you for the "lunch in my honor” (I think), but I had a life to get back to…

That said, the weekend was great. I got to meet all the girls, spend time with them, and I managed to leave without any battle wounds! Cheers to me! (Just give me some extra Worcestershire sauce right away…)

OK, OK, OK…hold the phone. Literally. My lunch with John at Gina’s is a moment that illustrates something I feel really passionate about. Was I angry? No. Annoyed? You can’t possibly imagine. I am quite relaxed about a lot of things but a total stickler about others. And bad manners is a real trigger.

I am always excited to take some time out and meet John up for a lunch or a drink, if our paths can cross between meetings and errands. It’s true, we don't live together, and we don’t see each other every day, but because of that, I want to make the most of our time together. I love him, and he makes me happy. Many factors in our lives—work, family, friends, friends, exhaustion and, in my case, Hannah—keep our lives pretty damn separate. I don't see him every day, so to steal away an hour or two on a weekday for lunch is both fun and kind of exciting.

Guys, when you’re out with a date, whether it’s a girlfriend of two years or a wife of 20 years, PLEASE be present! This means NO PHONE (I repeat: NOOOOO PHOOOOOOOONE), unless it is an emergency or your deal is going to collapse if you don’t take the bitch’s call, OK? Let’s face it, we aren't doctors working in an ER or in a maternity ward delivery babies. We deserve some quiet and some focused time together. Come on, guys. Be gentlemen. Leave the wheeling and dealing for the cab ride back to the office. If this isn't doable, then lunch isn’t doable. Quick little snippets of small talk between telephone distractions—calls or texts or otherwise—do NOT a happy lunch make. If that’s what’s going down during my lunch, then you’re going down, too. To be honest, I’d rather take an hour to browse Bergdorf’s and get a falafel on the way home. Thank you.

The food was great though (#shrimpsalad). You're welcome.

Bethenny invited me to see the new apartment on Twitter on Tuesday night, and I’m so excited. Looks like a really great pad. B knows what she wants, how she wants it, and when she wants it. I admire that tremendously. I need her to come up to the Berkshires with me and help me shake things up. I think her new SoHo apartment is even nicer than the TriBeCa apartment from the pictures I’ve seen. I’m can’t wait to go visit.

Oh, Ramona… Finding herself, distracting herself, dating to just have fun and get out there. I totally approve and think it’s great for her. She’s a gorgeous woman and needs to be seen and be told that. Often! People need to worry about what’s going on in their own backyard before snooping around Ramona’s front porch. Let Ramona be Ramona, and get on with it. This end-of-an-marriage thing is a process, and even though she has made the decision to move forward with the divorce, it can and may be a long process that will have its ups and downs. Hey, listen up: NYC lawyers are going to be involved, and there is no money in a quick divorce. Buckle your seatbelt, get a lot of rest, because this is just the beginning.

And now…the singles night at Beautique.

The Beautique restaurant is great for business dinners, first dates, and for a chic couple’s night out. It’s definitely a place to see and be seen. The back room, however, the Beautique Club, is a playground for singles and the glamorous singles. I knew John was going that night for a business dinner, but I have to admit, I had no idea he was going to slip through the dark kitchen corridor and down the rabbit hole to the back room club. As I watched, I was not happy about it, and I remembered how annoyed and surprised I felt when Ramona called me and told me. But, I trust John, and I believe it was innocent. After all, we’ve been together for two years, and I know John. John loves people and loves to be out and about. I get it. I just wish he would try to keep it try gender-neutral and not always have a female colleague that I don’t recognize with him. Too much to ask? I think not.

If it feels shady or wrong, and you might give people the opportunity to talk negatively about it, just don't do it. 

Dorinda Medley

My philosophy is simple: If it feels shady or wrong, and you might give people the opportunity to talk negatively about it, just don't do it. Fair, right? I wish he understood this better. In fact, I wish a lot of people understood this better. People love to talk and loooooooooooove to stir the pot. Why give them a pot to stir in the first place? Remember: If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it’s a duck. I know John is no duck, but not everyone else does.

I will say this, though: The girls came out in full force for me. Especially Lady Morgan. I really, really, REALLY appreciate that. Loyal girlfriends rock! I love my girls.

Anyway, I need a nap, because I’m already anxious about what’s coming up next week.

Have a great weekend! MUAH!

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