Episode 14: Bravotv.com's Editor ponders topless swimming, detective work, and Xanax.
Welcome back St. Barths babies. Unlike, LuAnn I am not in "clampdown mode" and I'm ready to talk about every topless, Xanax-suggested, Vassar-attending moment of Part 2 of the St. Barths debacle. Jumping right in. . .
We open with LuAnn and Tomas keeping especially mum about the late night activities at the villa. However, Ramona Singer leaves no stone unturned and she is going to get right to the bottom of this situation. . .
Ramona doesn't care who came to the villa. It could have been Tomas' double or a two-legged pig or any bizarre creature, animal, vegetable, or mineral. Of course that doesn’t mean she doesn’t want to know who or which it was.
Thankfully the talk quickly turns to more fun manners that exposes -- like ménage a seven. Ramona saying “Sure” to the proposition really thrilled me. I hope that is how she reacts to any sexual proposition.
Of course, everyone is falling right into Tomas’ goatee-set trap. Carole and Sonja were swoon-city when he was talking about his “Bridgette Bardot.” But in the end, the mating ritual resulted in Sonja getting snared -- and engaging in something that poor Heather had the unfortunate accident of witnessing. I’d love to put the proposition to Heather and see which she would have preferred walking into: Sonja and Tomas "buttf—king" (Carole’s word!) or the glass wall.
Next the ladies boarded a boat for Ramona day. Unsurprisingly, Ramona was taking lots of photos, but surprisingly her former foe was allowed to be in them -– Heather! Yes, as Sonja so eloquently remarked, “Heather is allowed to be in the vacation pictures.” The vacation mojo has taken effect and everyone is getting along. Ramona is of course worried that this will be disturbed by the arrival of Aviva and Reid, but we’ll have to wait and see. Until then the ladies are lounging on their noodles and instructing the boat crew to create some shade whilst they eat.
Meanwhile, Aviva is buried deep into her headphones listening to the soothing sounds of Stevie Wonder and Chaka Khan. Thankfully the plane touches down without incident, so the St. Barths mojo seems to be working in her way as well. . .for now.
Because you see, in a rental office mere miles away, Ramona and Sonja are just keeping their options open. You can never be too sure.
Back at the Villa, Ramona and Sonja are swimming topless. As Ramona mentions, there’s plenty of water in the Caribbean so whether you’ve already showered or not, all are welcome in the pool. Even Aviva and Reid, who arrive just as the ladies are enjoying their soak.
The ladies all greet Aviva and Reid, except for the topless twosome. Reid quickly excuses himself to get some work done upstairs. Sonja is relieved he’s not going to be the albatross of the trip and is ready to move forward.
Unfortunately that zen like feeling does not last for long. As the ladies are giving the 411 to Aviva things very quickly turn. Aviva wants to know what Ramona really thinks about Reid being there. She wants everyone to hug Reid and profusely thank him for depositing her in St. Barths. And that didn’t go especially well.And thus, the white trash gauntlet was thrown. Aviva wants Reid to feel welcome at ticker tape parade levels, and this house is not providing that sort of welcome. Carole, desperate to get to Russ' rehearsal, looks a bit lost in the entire matter. Everyone is threatening to leave, but who will go? How can Sonja get more wine from the magical spigot when she’s trapped in the bathroom?!? Where is the party for Aviva and Reid?!?
Eventually, Sonja decides to take the Kelly/petting approach with Aviva. The touch/feel thing could smooth the situation over. Miss Diplomat (LuAnn) didn't diplomat s--t and now they have to see if hugs can salvage the vacation. Well Sonja tried, and for that matter Carole tried too. Ramona tried by offering her whatever type of support and tears could put things back on track. There is some semblance of a move forward, with the hugging doing temporary magic, but now Sonja is feeling jilted. She's not going to apologize. She’s hurt. She doesn’t need new friends if this is what they are like. She has turned the corner!
And now to dinner!
Light and Fun
And so dinner! Ramona quickly aligns herself with her new BFF Heather and attempts to rearrange the tables into a more conducive to not-having-a-knockdown-dragout arrangement and toasts to fun! Fun, fun, fun! Aviva excuses herself for the restroom, giving Ramona and Sonja a chance to mention that Aviva’s venom is still in their system. We don't hear people say venom enough on this show. Lord knows it goes around enough that we should be constantly looking for antidotes. Anyway, it appears no amount of tequila or toast is going to bring a restorative calm to this group.
Add to that Aviva is feeling less than apologetic about her word choice, so we’re left to see next week if they can make it work or if Ramona and Sonja can properly Google white trash. What did you think of Aviva’s big entrance? Leave your thoughts in the comments!