Cast Blog: #RHONY

Vacation Hangover

Episode 16:'s Editor thinks the women need a vacation after their St. Barths vacation.

Welcome back to New York City friends. After a “vacation” the women have returned to their natural habitat. Naturally, they packed plenty of baggage on the way back. Will Ramonja ever forgive Aviva? Is Sonja on a “downward spiral”? Are Jacques and LuAnn OK? Did Carole develop a crippling addiction to pink cigarettes? Let’s assess. . .

The Bronx’s Food Is Burning
Ramona decides to ease back into the real world by having a culinary fest with Sonja and LuAnn. She’s going to let the menfolk do the cooking, while she tries to cook up some information about what’s going on with Jacques -- just kidding, she’s taking a page from LuAnn’s book and saying nothing!

Instead the main topic of conversation is Aviva (and sadly not Sonja’s headband, which is really what I want to talk about). While LuAnn tries to defend Aviva by mentioning how hard it was for her to make it to St. Barths, Sonja is not having it. She’s not going to let Aviva go around insulting people or pretending she’s Ernest Rutherford. Ramona is still maintaining that St. Barths-Aviva was some sort of phantom human or dual-personality, and not the woman they’ve known prior. In the end, Ramona maintains she’s a buzzkill even when she’s not around, so outlook cloudy on this all blowing over.

Meanwhile, in a gay bar on the other side of town, Carole and Heather have decided to chase their troubles away with alcohol and gay men. This seems to work effectively. The gals drunkenly bond over Aviva’s loud voice and the fact that “Boom Boom” was a runaway bride! Yes as it turns out she was engaged to be married and bailed on a Jamaican wedding. Who would have thought that Aviva was once on the cusp of a rasta ceremony. Of course, weeks ago I wouldn’t have guessed that Snoop Dogg would have become Snoop Lion. I guess those Rastafarians always sneak up on you.

We also find out later in the episode that Carole is chasing her troubles away with cigarettes. As you can imagine this doesn’t go over particularly well with Aviva -- even though the cigarettes are pink. How can anything that’s pink hurt you, says science? She should be fine.


A Baby Grows in Brooklyn
After courting the opinions of Manhattan, Heather decides she wants to get LuAnn’s good word as well. She wants to know what the Countess thinks of the whole St. Barths bust-up, and so over lunch the subject of dear Aviva comes up. The gals agree that it seems like things might not be fixed, and that Sonja and Aviva might be at odds for some time.

That bummer convo quickly turns to Jacques, and Heather wonders why LuAnn won’t just tell her the truth. LuAnn instead talks more about how she’s ready to have a baby tout suite! No time for dealing with rumors of indiscretion and phantom Italians. Look at how pregnant she might be!

Of course, that’s not the end of the St. Barths backlash. Over dinner, Aviva, Carole, and Heather continue to discuss the issue. Beyond the whole fight aspect (and Heather and Carole’s desire for Aviva to get over it), the ladies are more concerned about Sonja. Aviva thinks our Lady Morgan is being used, and wonders just what's going on with her at the moment.

So Carole decides to check out that spiral on a little shirt shopping spree. However, she’s majorly distracted from her quest for knowledge when she finds out the shirt maker is none other than Peyman Umay, who Carole went on that awkward date with. In a city of eight million people you still always run into the guy you didn’t call back.

After that awkwardness is brushed over, Carole tries to talk to Sonja about how difficult St. Barths, was but Sonja wants focus on how Sonja might not be the ideal hostess. . .Vacations get out of hand says Sonja. “That’s what people do on vacation. They party. They get their period. They break glasses. Things happen,” quote Lady Morgan. Roll with it Radz, amirite? That basically summarizes every vacation I've ever been on.

No Woman Is a Staten Island
Later in Sonja’s Boudoir, tea is being poured by Belgian interns and she and Ramona are discussing her ex. Sonja will be facing him for the first time since 2006 to discuss the settlement. Sonja is very concerned that he feels her proper energy and enjoys her decollete. Huh? Ramona is concerned Sonja’s letting her feelings get in the way of the business of getting divorced.


We’ll have to see if he remembers who Sonja is and if our girl Sonja will get some sleep anytime soon. . .

Manhattan Major Moment
Over another dinner with Heather, Aviva continues to discuss St. Barths. She would have lived and let live and all, but she felt bullied. And if I’ve learned anything about people feeling bullied on RHONY, it’s that they don’t take it sitting down. She’s got to say her piece and let it go, which means she’s going to have a major tete-a-tete with Sonja.

And so the meeting of the minds begins. Aviva apologies -- but mentions that she behaved the way she did because she didn’t feel welcome. Sonja accepts her apology -- but feels Aviva can’t take back some of the things she said. Aviva clears up all that Googling and defines white trash as “moral failure.” Things. Don't. Go. Well.


At the end of Sonja lays it all out there -- she doesn’t care. Boom. She doesn’t care about Aviva’s thoughts about her downward spiral or her thoughts on her anything frankly, because she is cutting her out of her life. And thusly Sonja takes her hat and pulls out of this one. Adios Aviva.

Next week we see if Aviva’s meal with Ramona goes any better (I don’t think I even need to say spoiler alert because you’re fully aware after seeing this that that could not be possible) and George enters the fray!

What do you think people? Which side are you on Aviva or Ramonja? Leave it in the comments.

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Carole on Elitists and Bitches

Carole says what she really thinks of Aviva and all of her talk about her book and things being "ghetto."

Dear Fans,

Let me start with something I stole it from Twitter this week. "The most dangerous liars are those who think they are telling the truth."

I'll say it again. The blonde at the end of the right couch, the one who's prone to lobbing limbs and insults, is an Insulting. Bitch. Some of you didn't believe me. Maybe some of you still don't. But after watching the reunion shows I imagine it's harder and harder to cheer for the anti-hero. Just when you think she can't get any faker she does.

The story according to Aviva makes me laugh: We were arguing, she insulted me, I called her a psychopath and that prompted her to affectionately compliment me on my age. Sure. Her disdain for the intelligence of the audience is palpable. It was too stupid for me to even reply. But as I was watching the reunion, and particularly Aviva and the way she treats people, I was reminded of something my Grandma Millie used to say. (I love everything Grandma Millie used to say.) "At 25, you have the face you're born with. At 45 you have the face you deserve."

I'd rather be 50 and me than be 45 and Aviva, any day of the week. She aged worse this season than a president in his first term. Holy short dress, I don't mind at all how I look. Overbite and all. I'll take it.

When I first met Aviva she was lovely. Really lovely. I meant what I said on the couch, I wish we had seen more of that. Her easy laugh and funny neurotic ways. Instead all we saw was a mean and angry woman. All because I asked her if she hired a writer -- a writer she did hire. It makes no sense. Three years ago she told me she'd read my memoir, What Remains. This was a book published in 2006 about my childhood, my family, my career and marriage, and then the death of my husband, Anthony Radziwill. A man I loved more than anyone I had loved before or have loved since. She gushed over my book. She quoted from it. We hugged. She seemed so sincere. Flash forward and she now believes it was written by a ghostwriter. She even knew his name, and it wasn't Truman Capote. It was Bill Whitworth, she told me. She repeated this over and over to anyone who would listen. And it doesn't matter how many times she repeats it -- it will never make it true.

When they stopped listening she started saying in the press and on social media that not only was my book written by someone else but that it was not my place to have written a book about my life, and my marriage. And, as if I didn't remember, she reminded me that I'd written about people who had died. Um, yeah. I know. It was my husband and my family and my closest friend who died. Just. . .wow. But I wasn't important enough to tell my story because my husband's family was famous, or historic or whatever she said. Because they had money and privilege and yachts. Really. Who do I think I am?

I’ll tell you. I’m a girl from upstate New York who grew up in a loving, if sometimes kooky, Italian working class family. I worked for everything I earned, just like my parents did and their parents before them. I have a proud family history of hard work and small but precious rewards that followed. My family won't be in any history books. I didn't grow up privileged. We didn't spend summers in Europe or Christmas in Palm Beach. A day spent at the town pool or playing in the woods behind our house was great. Much like Heather, I was taught strong values and decent manners. I learned to live with integrity and honesty. I'm proud of my upbringing and the woman I became, as was my husband. As is his family to this very day. I've known people who lived in what Aviva would consider the "ghetto" who have more class and decency than she shows.

All this talk about class and ghetto -- you'd think we were living in communist Russia. Here is the thing. This is America. In our country it doesn't matter a lick where you are from, it only matters where you're going. So don’t let anyone tell you that you aren't good enough because you didn’t grow up on Park Avenue or in a family that had some history, or because you enjoy saying mother-f---er now and then. I’ve met people from all walks of life. I spent time in refugee camps in Southeast Asia, and in the projects of Chicago. I've been to State dinners with Presidents. I met the Queen of England on a beach in Anguilla. No one is any more valuable or important than you are. No one is more important than your family and your friends.

Let the elitists go slow into the night.

In spite of the BookGate dust up I had a great time this season. I made wonderful new friends in LuAnn and Kristen and my friendship with Heather is more special and important to me than I could have ever imagined just three years ago. Friends have each other's backs. I love her, madly. And while we didn't always act appropriately, we had a lot of laughs. I hope you did too.

Thank you all for your supportive and funny and brilliant tweets. And while we didn't all agree on everything all of the time I enjoyed your participation in the show. Even the mean tweets about my skinny neck and my overbite were amusing. Like I said, I've stolen some tweets already. You may see others as dialogue in my next book, and yes, you can all say you were my ghostwriters.

As always,

With love, Writer Girl xoxo

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