Ramona: "When I get involved fireworks happen."

Aviva: "Don’t turn your back on me you wimp."

Ramona: "If she had long fingernails 10 inches long I would have marks and blood up and down my body."

George's response to Aviva not setting him up with Carole because they are like sisters: "Incest is best."

Aviva: "It’s a metaphor, metaphor. m-e-t-a-p-h-o-r"

Ramona to Aviva: "Having you around drives me to diarrhea, you upset my stomach."

Ramona: In my opinion, and I'm usually right. . .

Sonja, on Aviva: "Let’s be clear here, this woman did not split the Adam. She got on a plane with her husband, which she’s obviously done numerous times. She did go to school in France. You don’t get their by boat normally."

Carole: "I rarely drink to the point of no return, but after that trip I can’t wait to get bombed with Heather."

Sonja, on vacations: "That’s what people do on vacation. They party. They get their period. They break glasses. Things happen."

Ramona: "I didn’t get the memo, I don’t like surprises."

Aviva, on trying to give up fighting with Ramona and Sonja: "We’re agreeing that we cannot penetrate these brains."

Sonja, on Aviva's arrival: "Can I get a return to sender?"

Ramona on who LuAnn is allowed to bring home: "Who cares who she brought home? It could have been a two legged pig for all I care."

Ramona to Aviva: "Take a Xanax, calm down."

Aviva: "I’m very sorry for the words that I used -- that’s what Rush Limbaugh said when he called someone a whore."

Sonja, on Carole's thoughts on firing the chef for not prepping a dipping sauce: "Don't fire him, I'll f--k him."

Ramona on Sonja's state after Le Ti: "Oh she’s coma toast."

LuAnn: "I’m not just any pirate woman."

LuAnn: "Shopping for bathing suits is like masturbating. . .it's something you want to do alone."

Aviva: "It wasn't about my charity, it was about the children who are missing legs!"

Sonja on her time of the month: "If we threw Aviva's leg in here, and my blood, they’d be like, 'Murder!'"

Ramona, on the food at Carole's: "The only thing on the table was a bowl of M&Ms. I can't live on M&Ms, I guess Carole does."

LuAnn on Ramona's appearance at Sonja's photo shoot: "I wouldn't want you there, you’re a pain in the ass!"

Carole on Ramona: "I've yet to be at a party where Ramona has either caused or been part of some big drama."

LuAnn on her Native American heritage: "Careful for your scalp baby."

Ramona: "I'm going to hold the fifth on answering that."

Sonja and the band at LuAnn's party: "I'm sure a part of The Countess died that night because that was definitely not in the book of etiquette."

Carole on Ramona and Sonja's behavior during facial yoga: "I wish that Sonja and Ramona took it a little more seriously because they can both benefit from it -- but it's not my job to teach them good manners."

Sonja on George's methods of love-making: "What happened to the old-fashioned way? Doggie style!"

And -- Sonja: "I turn around -- it's George, with an erection. How do you like that? Gross. But at least we know it works."

George: "It's your America, Mario."

Sonja, on being set up with Aviva's father: "This could be really good or it could be really bad; Sex addict may be good, father bad."

Ramona: "I don't like being blindfolded. I won't even let Mario blindfold me. And trust me, he's asked."

LuAnn: "Who knew my eyebrows were just OK. I mean, I've always been told that they’re fabulous."

Sonja: "There's three things for the bidet: washing the lingerie, icing your face, and the obvious."

Carole on LuAnn's cape: "The b---h stole my look!"

Carole on the difference between childbirth and fiction writing: "When you give birth nobody criticizes the baby. Even an ugly looking baby everyone says is so cute."

Ramona to Heather: "Just because you smile, doesn't mean you're nice."

Carole to LuAnn: "Move over pumpkin head!"

Sonja, on her financial future: "I always envision myself on the subway, shaking a can, for money."

Heather: "The Countess seems to be wearing on the Princess. . .I think we may have the royal wars."

Heather on Aviva and Ramona's friendship: "When did Aviva crawl so far up Ramona's ass? I mean don't go there, it's not nice. It's dark and it's not good."

Sonja on her interns: "My interns don't charge me, my attorneys do. My interns listen to me, sometimes, but my attorneys never do. So it's a win/win."

Carole: "I like to date men my exact, own age -- between 37 and 45."

Carole: "When people ask me if I'm a princess I usually say 'Yes, and don't fuck with Cinderella."

Carole: "Do you think we're part of the one percent?"

Ramona: "Oh my God, light bulb on my head, Pinot on my head!"

Carole, on LuAnn: "It's like she has Royal Tourette Syndrome."

LuAnn on having another child: "I think Fertile Myrtle has taken a little wander into the pasture."

LuAnn: "Ramona and I agreed to make peace, but I am walking very slowly over the ice filled pond."

Aviva on her phobias: "Because I lost my leg being trapped in a conveyer belt, I'm just always afraid of being trapped in other kinds of machines."

LuAnn: "What other tricks do you have to pull out of your Pinot-filled hat?"

Aviva: "Say what you mean, just don't say it mean."

Heather: "I will remain Jewish by injection."

Sonja: "I don't stir the pot, I stir the drink."

Aviva: "I don't want us to become mean girls."