Heather: I Don't Hate Aviva, I Hate Her Behavior
Heather believes that Ramona is once a s--- stirrer, always a s--- stirrer, but she tries to focus on what's really important: her anniversary.
What is important?
We kick off tonight’s show with a cocktail party I hosted at my friend's beautiful downtown store, jewelry designer Karen Karch. Jon and I bought our wedding bands from Karen (which is how we met her) and have been friends ever since.
As weddings, babies, and anniversaries have come and gone, my friendship with Karen has grown so much, that she was inspired to design a capsule collection based on our friendship, our struggles, and her desire to give back. A percentage of the profits from the capsule collection benefit The Kellner Pediatric Liver Foundation, a charity I co-founded. I urge you all to go on the Kellner site and learn more!
Packed to the hilt, the event brings a full house to Karen Karch and I'm so happy you get to see the beautiful pieces she designed. They are extraordinary. All the girls are out to support the cause and Ramona practically came straight off the plane from Africa -- I am so grateful to see her that I give her a big hug and kiss. I am delighted Ramona and I are finding our way and truly becoming friends. I bring her up to speed on the Aviva issues and she seems to understand and agree that Aviva just goes in too hard and too deep. The pattern I see with Aviva concerns me, and I have to be honest about my feelings. We are not in a good place because the hard hooks I continually see her throw at people are recurring and something we all recognize.
The next scene finds Kristen, Carole and I on location in NYC at the spring photo-shoot for Yummie by Heather Thomson. This is not the first time we have used Kristen to model and she always delivers. The first time I hired Kristen years ago, she and Josh had just moved back to NY and I didn't even connect the dots that she was Josh's wife! She won us over on her own merit! Kristen is gorgeous and such a great representative for Yummie. She loves my leggings and I'm glad you get to see her rock them! Of course, everything looks great on Kristen -- but my leggings are a favorite and it feels good that she not only models for me but genuinely loves my products. I feel the same about Josh's EBOOST-- it’s the real deal. Carole often pops in on my photo shoots. It's always good to have her around. I am so happy Radz and Kristen are developing a genuine bond of their own.
While we are taking a break, as if on cue, I get a call from Ramona who is now suddenly dead set on forcing a peace between Aviva and me. And it certainly feels forced. . .Why do I feel as if I am being ambushed? But I agree to drinks with Aviva in hopes of setting the record straight. Who knows, maybe she misunderstood my intentions, feelings, and outrage and maybe we can put this behind us and move forward, or in the least have a better understanding of each other.
Drinks with Aviva -- right out of the gate, she wants to set ground rules. After last week I am not happy I lost my temper. However, I know myself and can't promise not to swear in a conversation of this nature. I do need to work on that but this is not the time. We are both arch and ready to attack. Maybe I am programmed this way because I now have so much experience with Aviva and her tactics and know I am next in line.
The idea that Aviva thinks a comparison with the late Anna Nicole Smith, (R.I.P) and Sonja is a compliment just shows how different we think. To me it is outrageous, even egregious. As glamorous as Anna Nicole was, her alleged addictions drove her to the grave too soon -- not cool Aviva! It also wasn't cool that Aviva twisted my words around to make it sound like I don't appreciate stay-at-home moms, which is typical Aviva. REWIND girl! I said nothing in reference to mothers at all. I don't name drop. My career includes working for well-known people who have greatly impacted my life and just so happen to be famous. It's always a tit-for-tat with Aviva and yet again, instead of taking any responsibility for her actions she tries to turn it around to support her negative argument, just like she did with Carole.
I said nothing about working mothers vs. stay-at-home moms. What I did say is that Aviva doesn’t respect the careers people build, or the people that have built them. After two glasses of wine and several lipstick applications, I come to the conclusion that only one thing that truly matters remains: Do Aviva and I care enough about one another to try to move ahead? I have said it and I mean it -- I do not hate Aviva, but I do hate her behavior. I met and grew to care about a person who is of value, but that person doesn't come out much anymore. Come on Aviva. . .be honest, be real, and then we can have fun!
I do leave drinks with an open mind about inviting her to our anniversary party, but unlike Aviva, I am honest. And even with the pressure from Sonja and Ramona to invite her, I know in my heart that it's too early to go there. I need to navigate through moving forward honestly. Of course, I also need to run it by Jon and I believe in going with your gut, and clearly made the right decision. This night is about me and Jon, not me and Aviva.
Jon and I have had 10 wonderful years as husband and wife. The time flew by but our years have been marked with some exceptional moments especially having our kids. We have so much to be thankful for and to celebrate and I really wanted to share and mark our first 10 years on the actual date, with a very special occasion full of many of our true friends that you don't get to see. I was a bit disappointed that Sonja and Ramona decided to not only to skip the party (after RSVPing yes) but to do so without any heads up to me. Instead, they designated LuAnn as their emissary of regret. There is more to this story than solidarity with Aviva, I might add. Wow. . .but you know this behavior is completely in character for the both of them.
Ramona, I guess once a s--- stirrer, always a s--- stirrer and that stinger of hers, is ever present. I try not to sweat the small stuff and that is exactly what their behavior was. I don't have time or energy for worrying about these two ladies who live at the fringe of my life. I just continue to learn about them both, warts and all.
What's important tonight is friends. One of our besties, Carole, wrote and delivered the most wonderful speech to Jon and I but you don't get to see it -- like a lot of the party -- but I can assure you it was a celebration! The best celebration of good friends, good food, lots of Ciroc, and thanks to my dear friend and DJ PeterPaul, who was also at our wedding 10 years ago, good music! The tunes were rocking and we got to do just that! Everyone here is where they want to be at this very moment and that is what is important to me.