I felt left out by my girlfriend LuAnn and didn't feel the commitment to commit from Harry. However, I don't feel that LuAnn did it to spite me -- as Kristen asked when she came to visit. LuAnn and I had a heart-to-heart at Heather and Carole's party. We discussed how I want her to have a guy thats her "forever guy." Even though I love Jacques, I told him at the Life and Style party that I love LuAnn a lot more. I knew that the relationship was not going to be forever. I am very intuitive. I have a Pisces moon.
Harry should have checked with me before taking off to the club to see if I wanted to go -- and if not to make sure I got home OK. I realize they were both drinking and that Lu after her break up that she just wanted to have a good time, but she knows Harry's my sidekick.
That morning when the girls came over, I was feeling very sad and confused. Tyler rarely speaks. He's like E.F Hutton, when he says something, everybody listens. He heard LuAnn say "I am single now, let's go Harry." That didn't include me. I foolishly chased after both of them, because I wanted to be with them, and sprained my ankle on my fishtail dress. The train on that dress was from here to St. Tropez. I knew I had to get to the bottom of it with LuAnn before I spoke to Harry, because I already had my doubts about Harry's ability to commit. This was not a good sign that Harry was going to commit to commit.
One of the reasons Harry wants to nail me down right now (no pun intended) is because he knows I am ripe for the picking. I have had a fabulous year! I am feeling strong, and I have never felt better about everything! After that morning I was feeling so grateful to all the people who support me and want to see me do well.
As I said last year, when my ex husband didn't show up for the settlement meeting with the lawyers -- it wasn't about the money, it was about not having my best friend and father to my daughter in my life. I can take care of myself and my daughter on my own. I have always been independent and was a full-time partner in my relationship. I have come full circle since the film distributer secured the 7 million dollar judgment against me and have learned so many valuable lessons over the course of this experience.