Bethenny: I Was Frustrated Beyond the Brink

Bethenny explains what prompted her to try and help Sonja.

Turks, here we come. Put us on an island and just add water, and the craziness begins!

Let me back up and clean up the Kristen mess. I said it best at Luann's party: I may have an opinion on the choices that someone makes in business, but that doesn't mean that I'm going to walk up and get in someone's face about it.

If Kristen had something she wanted to discuss with me or ask me, there is a way to do it. Starting with a negative tone certainly doesn't motivate me to have a conversation. Kristen is a beautiful and fashionable girl who cares a lot about looking pretty, and no doubt she knows a lot more than I do about nail polish. I wish her all the luck and success in the world. I am no expert in anything. I just go by my personal experience and my gut.

Ramona was getting my back, and I understand where it came from. As she said, she feels like Kristen has had a hard on for me and just wants to get in the ring.

Now we get to Turks. I was shocked and had forgotten how getting to a rental house is akin to the running of the bulls in Pamplona. Ramona felt that she and Sonja had some seniority or special privilege and that they deserved first choice of the rooms. It turned me off a little bit. We are all beyond grown women, and no one is more entitled than anyone else to a certain kind of room. None of us besides those two even cared; the principle really got to us. And karma got involved, because Luann got the best room by just "being cool" and sashaying into her pool and ocean front piece of heaven. I slept in a twin bed facing the driveway and couldn't have cared less.

Ramona, aka "Swiper" from Dora the Explorer, was in rare banana-colored bikini form. She was classic Ramona, and I loved every minute of it. Watching her awkwardly exercise while trying to heist Carole's shoes could entertain me for days and actually did.

There was a tiny moment with me talking to Heather about her brand. Perhaps this is to lay the groundwork for me being a know-it-all, but I think she has talent and is a great fashion designer. I was merely suggesting that she really focus on fitness, because there is a lot of opportunity there. She seemed to take offense to that. Everyone is a little sensitive and touchy. I think I'm missing that chip, so I often say something to offend them. As Kathy Griffin says, "You can't be who you're not".

It really is me at this point, because I don't need to insert myself into Sonja's life. I'm just trying to be constructive, because she seems to have alienated the other women at this point. I hope this isn't a shame-on-me-for-trying moment, but I can only do what I can do.

I understand Sonja feeling very paranoid and not trusting of this group. I genuinely want the best for her and for her to succeed in all areas of life. There really is a lot going on for many women in this group emotionally.

It is not my job to fix anyone, and I'm not Dr. Drew. I care about and genuinely like Sonja, and I was trying to break in and make some sense of the situation. I had no right to tell her or anyone to shut the f--- up. I was frustrated beyond the brink. In watching this episode, I see how intense I can be. If you knew the half of what was going on with me personally, you might understand. That said, we all have our sh--.

I was glad to hear that Luann is having good sex, and I was genuinely excited for a great girls' trip. We're all blessed to have these amazing opportunities. What happens next on this island is definitely one for the books. In the words of the late Karen Carpenter, "We've only just begun..."

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