Gretchen, you're great. I've liked you since day 1. Vicki and Tamra showed their true colors last season and from the first episode this season, they haven't changed. Too bad you have to associate with them. Keep standing your ground and defending yourself. It was great to finally see you tell Tamra to F off! I read Slade's blog. He is a great guy. I love the way he defended you. The things he said about Tamra and Vicki are what most of us viewers feel and wish we could say to their faces! Well atleast I wish I could, lol.

where did u get that dress that you're wearing at the end of this episode?? (it's a navy(?)colored tank dress) i LOVE it; great style!!

Gretchen, I'm your biggest fan ever!! I totally agree with you on all accounts! xoxo

Hi Gretchen,

As someone who also lost a partner, it doesn't get easier - you just learn to live with the loss and accept the reality of it. Some may call that easier, but the void is there, and that is ok - it means that person was that important to you and unique. There is a part of your heart that Jeff will always hold - and no one will be able to get inside place - nor should you feel guilt about having that place in your heart that you can not share. But that doesn't mean your heart doesn't have room to create another special place for someone else and no one has a right to deny you that except yourself should you choose. I don't know the details of your behavior/decisions after Jeff's death, but that is all part of the grieving process and that is a personal and individual process. It is different for everyone. Sometimes we are at a loss of how to express the emotions we are feeling while grieving - heck, some are emotions we probably can't even put a name or description to. But it seems like you have gone through that period and have re-centered your life to being you again...that's not to say you don't still have strong emotions, - but rather you are at a place now that Gretchen can deal with them and not the Demon called Grief.

Gretchen- Please let us know what colors and brands of makeup you use. I love love love your makeup!! THanks

Gretchen- Please please post what makeup you use, colors and brands. I love your eye makeup! Thanks

Gretchen, I would just like to say I admire you for your strength and determination. You handle your haters so well. It still appauls me when people say you were with Jeff just because of his money. I watched cancer take my mom from me at the age of 19. I know there is nobody on this world that would stand by someone's side while cancer over takes their body just for money. You have a beautiful heart and spirit about you. Keep being the classy woman you are and inspiring us all!

Gretchen, I just wanted to encourage you to keep being the person that you are. I also wanted to say how sorry I am for the loss of Jeff, to you and the rest of his family and friends.

Gretchen:

I read your blog and also I follow you in Twitter and FB. I am a fan! so sad about what Tamra called you and then people were searching for your photos it was sad....just because that's not the way we (housewives) see you.

Youth, beauty and talent are hard to take for some people causing them to be "ugly". Ignore her...I am sure you know how much we all like you and wish the best for you.

Stay cool! Suport Gay people! Be real!!! :o) We all wish you the best! and keep that man close to you! he's so cute :o)

Hey Gretchen! Just wanted to let you know that you are my favorite housewife. So glad to see you all back. None of the other housewife shows even compare to the OC. I was so happy to hear you put Tamraaaaa in her place. She really needs to quit being so jealous and worry about her own man. Maybe if she put as much time and effort into her relationship with her husband instead of worrying about yours, she might have a happier marriage. I have also seen alot worse things on the internet about her than you so, she totally lost on that arguement.

You are a great person because you take full responsibility for your actions. I have never heard you blame others, and for that you are great to watch. Keep being yourself, you dont owe any one an apology for the way you choose to live your life. So live it loudly, proudly, and love however the hell you want to love Girlie.

I just wanted to say... I had my beloved pass away and no one understands that pain unless they've been through it themselves. No one has the right to tell anyone else how to grieve. The housewives are this guilty pleasure for me and my new beau.

Don't let anyone tell you how to grieve, it is different for us all. I went through a deep depression but to look at me, no one would have ever guessed. I was destructive to my self for a good 6 months and I only have myself to answer to.

I think it's especially hard when you are younger (I'm 30 now but my experience was 3 years ago). The people around you have not yet experienced the pain you have nor can they understand... empathy, yes... a true understanding, no. Especially after a disease like cancer. I found my love, dead, and it will forever change me and if someone says shit about my experience, you bet they'll hear about it from me. There's only so much guilt and mourning I can put on myself and certainly don't need anyone other than my close circle of friends telling me what to do or how to feel.

She deserved an eff-off. She can experience that kind of pain and then have shit to say.

You truly wear your heart out there for everyone to see and you are true to who you are and don't fake it for the cameras. From what I see on this show, you are a wonderful, warm person with a lot of class and sass! :) Don't let T and V's bitterness and cruelty get you down. Everybody can judge, but not everyone can empathize. People should think about that before they open their mouth to criticize. Keep your head high and smile. We all do things we wish we would not have done when the bottom of our world falls out and we have no idea how to cope in the immediate aftermath. You made a mistake and took responsibility for it. Go out and enjoy the life you have been blessed with. Jeff would approve.

You are my favorite housewife because you are beautiful both inside and out and your antics make me laugh!!! :)

MJ I absolutely love your pink dress and makeup! You look fabulous.

Gretchen, You truly wear your heart out there for everyone to see and you are true to who you are and don't fake it for the cameras. From what I see on this show, you are a wonderful, warm person with a lot of class and sass! :) Everybody can judge, but not everyone can empathize. People should think about that before they open their mouth to criticize. Keep your head high and smile. I know I speak for myself and I think for a lot of women out there-WE all did things we wish we would not have done when the bottom of our world fell out and we had no idea how to cope in the immediate aftermath. You made a mistake and took responsibility for it. The person/people who capitalized on your vulnerability and pain are truly heartless and only looking to make some $$$/fame off of your mistake. People who keep bringing it up on the show have no respect for you. We all do crazy things, we just don't all have them plastered on the front page of the gossip magazines. Go out and enjoy the life you have been blessed with. Jeff would approve.

You are my favorite housewife because you are beautiful both inside and out and your antics make me laugh!!! :)

MJ I absolutely love your pink dress and makeup. You look fabulous!

I'm so proud of you for standing up for yourself!! Don't let the "mean girls" win! I know what it's like to take care of a loved one that is terminally ill and then carry on after their passing. I admire that you were loving and caring enough to stand by Jeff during his illness. There aren't many young women your age that would be willing to do what you did. Live, love and laugh as much as you can, as that will be the biggest tribute you can give to Jeff!!

Gretchen, I think you are just such a wonderful, loving and caring person. As someone who has lost a partner and also previously lost my mother, I know what you were going through last season when you spent all your time at the hospital with Jeff. I did that for a year with my husband and then for a year and a half with my mother. It is devastating. It galled me so much last season when Tamra had the nerve to judge you because you went to Bass Lake. I liked your response. Until she has been faced with the situation, she has no idea what it is like to have your own life taken away from you and having to devote all of your time to caring for someone else. You are truly a wonderful person for what you did for Jeff, and he will always have a place in your heart, and you will think about him every day. There is, however, room in your heart for someone else, so good luck with your relationship with Slade. I hope things work out well for you. Slade, don't hurt Gretchen, she's too nice a person. I could see all the tension in this season's first episode and all I can say about Tamra is that she needs to pay more attention to her own family and her own problems. Looks like she has some of her own to deal with and she needs to stay out of your business and not judge you. Where does she get off judging you anyway with her own life being what it is. She's just catty and vindictive. So is Vicki. Jeana I can deal with and Lynne is a sweetheart, but Vicki and Tamra make my skin crawl.

Anyway, just wanted to tell you how much I love you and keep being you and don't worry about what other people think. You are a much bigger person than they are as you have always tried to make peace with everyone, and they are just catty and vindictive. Take care of yourself and look forward to seeing you more this season.

Gretchen, you're so beautiful. I love all your clothes, your energetic personality, charisma, and outlook on life. You are true inspiration to me. I LOVE you girl!!! You the prettiest housewife among ALL the housewifes, atlanta, new york, new jersey, etc. LOVE YOU!!! you are drop dead gorgeous! We love your hairstyles! We love watching you and Slade; you make such an attractive couple!

I just wanted to say you are young beautiful and you have alot going for you don't let anyone get you down!! It is nobody's business what you do or with who you do it! Tamara is just jealous and unhappy !!!

Gretchen, You are a gorgeous person-inside and out. I admire your energy, spirit, and most of all, class. You are truely a great role model :)

Gretchen, you're amazing (: you are definitely my favorite!! There is so much I'd love to say to Tamara and Vicki!! For now just keep standing up for yourself (: you're doing great!!

Gretchen, So glad you are healing. Losing someone is so heartbreaking. Be strong and keep your head up. Watch out for alcohol, you are so tiny that even one drink may affect you very, very quickly and leave you vulnerable. Your sweetness and kindness shows through each time you write and speak, and you are so doggone funny! Blessings.

u rock

Jyst wanted to say good luck to you and Slade if that's what you want from life. You seem very nice even if sometimes mistakes are made... Heck we all make mistakes but most of us are lucky enough not to be "celebs" who get posted on the internet! Right? Right! Be happy.

You are the best, my favortie housewife! I think you deserve to be happy, have to admit I am a little concerned about Slade, but if you are happy that is all that matters! Don't let the negativity get to you!!

Team Gretchen! As they say in the ATL, "let your haters be your motivators!"

Gretchen,

I see I am not alone, being a fan of yours. First of all, I think you are genuine and true, which is not easily said for the other housewives. Praise to you for keeping things as kosher as can be with a bunch of jealous, catty women. Don't let the judgments of other women affect your happiness. Everyone will always have an opinion with regards to grieving, when is the appropriate amt of time to move on, etc. I am so happy you have found Slade. And damn he is hot :) You two seem perfect for each other. I am so excited to watch this season.

I just wanted to say that I, too, have gone down a similiar dark path at one time in MY life, as you, & it was hard & embarrassing to have others see me in that light. (And then on top of it, have them GLOAT about YOUR PAIN) Keep your head up. You WILL be OK. God Bless, Tam. E.

Go girl! Stay strong and keep taking the high road :) Don't let them break your spirit!

Gretchen, I know all the pain of losing someone to cancer. My mother and I lost my dad almost 2yrs ago to cancer it was and is extremely painful. Everyone does say it gets better but it hasn't for us and honestly I don't think it ever will. But one thing we always tell people is you'll always have that place for that person in your heart and you'll always miss them specially when you hear or see their fav. songs/movies/or things they enjoyed. Like my dad was a race car driver since he was 15yrs old so its pretty hard for me and my mom to go to the local race track where he raced. I always tell people that lose someone that I honestly can't say it gets better but I can say you will be okay. And it doesn't matter what people think about you its what you think about yourself. And i think you and slade are absolutely adorable me and my mom hope ya'll stay together!! lots of love and prayers

TiffanyR

Gretchen, I have been watching RHW ever since the show began with Lori and everyone. You are hilarious and inspiring, and you don't let what other people think about you rule your life. Tamra is green with envy. I think you are true to yourself and you speak from the heart. The other wives say that you are trying to play the victim, but based on what I see on the show, you are not. xoxo

What happened to Slade's blog? It was there a day ago.

TEAM GRETCHEN

Gretchen, I think you're the biggest sweetheart in the world. It was clearly obvious that you weren't with Jeff for the money because of the relationship you had with his children...they definitely wouldn't have warmed up to you like they did if you were after their dad's money! We all make mistakes and you just happen to be unfortunate enough to have your mistakes displayed to the world. Keep your head up and keep being who you are. You're a beautiful person both inside and out....take care of yourself!

I think you are awesome. You make the show. Even though you are not a housewife is ok. The other ladies are extremely jealous of you and it shows. Glad you put the older blonde in her place, next comes the grandma blonde Vicki. Watching you makes me laugh cause you are always so happy and go with the flow. You are a great person and sorry your pics got out on the internet, but you are still on the show not letting it get you down. Way to go!

gretchen, keep doing what you do and ignore the jealousy. your counterparts on the show talk mad sh!t but continue to whisper about your beauty and age. i see through it, i hope you do too!!

Gretchen, My 12 year old passed away 2 1/2 years ago and I was in so much pain. I was talked about for showing up at my other kids' activities and not looking pained enough for quite a long time. Little do those people know I don't remember a single games or activity that happened in the first year of his passing. My ex started all kinds of crap and there are still those today that continue to hassle me. Not one of those woman have any right to tell you anything because they don't know what that feels like. It is so easy to slip into a bottle or anything else to take away those feelings that don't ever go away. You will feel better but like you said there will always be something that will make you remember and eventually I hope the memories will be fond memories and not ones that cause grief. And to be honest, when you told Tamra to F off, I instantly though. FINALLY! I thought she deserved it about the Bass Lake thing, but you stayed above it then, and finally it snapped. Good job! Love that you continue to share with all of us! xoxo

Gretche~

I like that you are real and honest, and make no apologies for who you are. You own what you do and accept responsibility for your actions, unlike MOST of your cast mates... Don't worry about "the haters", keep true to yourself and forget the rest. I am happy that you and Slade have found each (although you have been friends for many years) and I wish you too good luck with your relationship. He seems to really care about you and your wellbeing. I look forward to watching the rest of the season! Take care!

Gretchen, you are my girl! By far, the most "real" housewife in the OC. I like you because you don't try to be something you are not and you are not trying to put others down to try to boost yourself up. Nobody is perfect and you are not afraid to show this side of yourself. Keep your head up and continue to be you. Don't let the cattiness get to you, and for pete's sake, don't get sucked into it.

Gretchen, I luv luv luv ur hair!!! Will u plz post a video of how you do it! From just out of the shower to walking out the door. What products you use, blow drying, what rollers, etc the whole sha-bang!! Thank you so much!

CaSandra

I just wanted to say to Gretchen if you read these blogs I hope you know how many people who watch this show adore you. You have been through a very hard situation the loss of any loved one is devastating. No one is perfect yes you made some bad choices but who really can judge anyone. I watched the whole last season and could see how much you cared for Jeff. I can see that some people are just really jealous of you and that's sad that they have to be so cruel in the process. One of the best quotes I always remember when I deal with mean people is: "Remember what's in the bottle is in the well". Keep in mind when dealing with these mean ones that the well is definatly poisoned for some. I've said me peace Big time team gretchen and now slade (why are they such haters to him?) team!

Hey girl..ya know you just have to kick some people to the curve..don't be nieve and thinking they are in you best interests, I know jeana is, and not sure about the new girl? But she appeats sincere, men are more the best of friends in your case..trust me.

Gretchen

You are my fav! I encourage you to stay strong and know who you are at the end of the day. People are going to talk no matter what but just keep your head up! I was so glad to see you stand up for yourself against Tamara.

can't wait for tonights show!!

More power to you Gretchen, I can see that many of your fans have lost loved ones as well hopefully you will gain some strength from them. Don't let Tamara or Vicki get to you, they have no lives and obviously get some sort of kick out of making fun and talking about others. Rise above them, as you have in the past! Best to you Gretchen

You are great!! You are so pretty it radiates out that you are a great person!! You laugh have fun and everyone makes mistakes! Vicki and Tamara look a little rough around the edges and I am sure when they were broke single moms they were making mistakes they just didn't have press following them around!! You are by far the prettiest housewife EVER!! My husband thinks so too :) You should do FB like Dina RHW of NJ It is neat to see what she is up too. Take care and live your life to the fullest!!

Gretchen, I just watched the first episode of season 5, and I wanted to let you know that I think you are awesome. You are truly an inspiration for me. You have had to go through so much. Yet you are still generous, honest, fun, real, happy, carefree, etc. More of the ladies on the housewives could learn a lesson from you. Nice job on sticking up for yourself and believing in yourself. I know that I could use that courage! I hope that you find whatever it is you are looking for in life!

Gretchen, I LOVe YOU!!!! Ok but anyways i think your a great person, i dont care what Vicki and Tamra says about you.. I think you make the show and if it was for you i wouldnt watch it... BTW you and Slade make a great couple,ur hot he is hot soo two hot people make a great couple and yes Gretchen i am gay soo tell Slade he doesnt have to worry, lol.... Hope i get to see more from you on the show... Chris

I don't believe you made the best choices after Jeff's passing but I agree with you when you say people make mistakes and everyone desesrves a second chance. It's wrong for Tamara and Vicki to judge you and to talk about you. Its none of there buisness they have no room to talk because they are the least liked on the show

Dear Gretche,

You are a breathe of fresh air amidst all the fakeness and silicone in the O.C. Keep being true to yourself and make no more mention of trying to get a boob job--you are perfect and an original.

I wanna shirt that says "TEAM GRETCHEN"!! I hate Tamara and honestly think she just talks about you because she is jealous of you! YOU GO GIRL!!!

I cried when you were on the beach. I do not know why you would want to be in the same room with Vicki or Tamra. She does not have a job. You made Jeff happy and that is all that maters. he knew what you too had. I had almost the same thing happen to me ( mine was not as wealthy as yours). He was older than me. No one knows how difficult life is after someone you love dies. Slade is what you need now