Hey buddy, sad to see you both apart. However, you did change and try to control her. You used to be happy, laughing and didn't care because you loved your wife. Somewhere that changed for you and I am sorry for that. I really enjoyed the both of you when you came onto Orange County. But you really changed and tryed to control witch you lost. Bummer not to see you anymore. Yes, take the time and focus on your childern because that is the most important. Good Luck to you

Simon man you're awesome. I got nothing but mad respect for you man. I wish you nothing but the BEST of luck and success to you Simon.

-Mongo

Cool, it's well, to be in the future ...

I really enjoy reading you blog which spirit me up and pursue for future.You really an outstanding person just the same as your articles.I really have a nice time with you.Thank you very much!http://www.blurty.com/users/allon7217619

I hope you find a good woman that compliments you with no desire to be first in the marriage. Good wishes. S

Hi Simon,
I am not sure if you will read this since you are not blogging anymore. I do not know what is going on with your marriage but I really do pray you can go to counseling and work things out. I am a wife who listened to a toxic friend point out all the negatives in my husband. After about 5 years I left him. It took until I met someone to remarry that I realized who she was. She started in on my new relationship before she really ever knew him. OMG. Now I look back and realize how damaging she was to my marriage. BUT you are not going to be able to tell that to Tamara and that does not mean you do not have room for some improvement. Just do everything in your power to keep your marriage. My children have suffered soooo much. One is so screwed up and now I blame myself. If my husband had not be so stubborn and proud, if he would have tried to date me and romance me back, if he would have given me sometime (he gave me 30 days to get back in the house) I would have come back and saved myself and my children soo much pain. He was a lot like you. So I pray you can romance her back. Think of your children first, do not be too proud to admit some fault. Simon after abut 3-4 months I begged my husband to get back together and he refused. He said, "I gave you 30 days to make up your mind and you did not move back in so we are going on with the divorce".
I was confused, hurt, hanging on the the toxic girlfriend, TRY to stay loving and give Tamera time. She will realize what she is doing to her children. Be open to change.

Simon,

I'm sorry to hear of your separation. I know it must be difficult and very hard to endure.

Between the footage of you both in the closet - deciding what Tamra "should" wear, in what is and isn't "appropriate" and the limo ride to the party, it was sad to see you belittle her and expect her to hold it together for the party. Is it any wonder she broke down? And what did you do? Leave? Big of you.

Should she wear a paper bag and become a hobbit?

It was apparent you were judgmental and critical of Tamra from the way she dressed, to how she mothered, down to personality traits which you claim she obtained from Vicky and that she treats you like Vicky treats Don. You attacked her and it was unfair.

Vicky and Don seem to have a mutual respect for each other and hold each other in high esteem and they work it out.

Vicky is a strong and successful business woman. Don does not get in her way of being who she is, and doing what she does in the way of her business and he supports her. An admirable trait.

They both have admirable traits, and if Tamra picks up on that, how can that be a bad thing? If she is stronger, if she doesn't put up with your critical crap like she has, how is that wrong?

Why can't you support and respect your wife?
Why do you belittle her on national tv?
Why try to control her?

It is apparent you are insecure and that is your issue not hers.

Wearing a dress doesn't make her less of a mother or wife.
Being strong doesn't mean she is any less respectful.

Put on your big boy pants and own up to what you have done to contribute to this rocky road you are on.

I'd suggest one on one therapy and couples therapy if you both desire to reconcile at some point.

You have to admit, that people change. People evolve. You either grow together or grow apart. It takes work to remain committed to goals you both have.

It takes acceptance. If you don't accept Tamra for who she is, that is the end.

If you are willing to see how she has blossomed and grown in a good way, you may have a fighting chance.

You cannot command respect. You have to earn it.

Simon, I understand this is a difficult time for you and your family. I hope all works out best. You should be thankful that you are in a position to get out. I have been married going on 15 years with a 14 year old and twin girls that are 5. I am forced to stay because I have no where to go. My mother passed when the twins were born and I have no family. I have always dedicated my life to family first.I wish I could have somewhere to go and the money to get out and away from this dysfunction family for the sake of my children.I have M.S in the starting fazes and I am unable to work, which me I hate to see the children divided but sometime it is for the best.If you ever need a nanny and have a inlaw suite, email mail and get me and my kids out too!!!

BEST OF LUCK SIMON! MOST OF ALL...TRY TO MAKE IT WORK BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR WIFE...EVEN IF IT TAKES LOOKING AT YOUR IMPERFECTIONS ,CHANGING YOUR WAYS, SEEKING COUNSEL, GETTING AWAY FROM THE DRAMA, PRIVACY, AND TURNING THE CAMERAS OFF! YOU A GOOD HUSBAND, AND FATHER. TAKE CARE.

IT'S NOT THE LETTING GO THAT HURTS, IT'S THE HOLDING ON.

Yes Simon, you do have control issues, trying to hold onto control in your relationship.

Holding on too tight causes pain and frustration. Everything in life is temporary, you have to let go of everything eventually, even life itself. To be happy, you have to give up trying to force things to be different from how they are. If you had accepted Tamra for who she is, which is a beautiful, sexy, vivacious, bubbly woman, she might still be your wife today, as she clearly loved you.

Letting go of the belief that there is only one way that things should work out, and only one outcome that will make you happy frees you to go with the twists and turns that are inevitable in life. Going with the flow frees you from the pressure of trying to control things which are beyond your control.

In every aspect of our lives, letting go of a rigid idea of how things should be sets us free to find fulfillment in the endless choices and chances that life offers us. And enables us to simply appreciate the beautiful people in our lives.

Holding on tightly to beliefs and expectations prevents you from attaining happiness: it creates tension which is a barrier to freedom and joy. People can become rigid with too many fixed ideas of what they want, what they need, how their lives should be. And you are waaaaay too rigid to be happy, Simon! Honestly. So rigid that it is uncomfortable to watch you as we can feel that tension right through the tv ...

It is such a human tendency to tightly clutch the things we have for fear of losing them. We even hold tight to negative beliefs, unhappy relationships, and unsatisfactory jobs. We do this out of fear. Fear that if we let go of what we have, we won’t find anything better, or even as good. Fear that somebody else will get what's 'ours'.

Not only is it impossible to hold on to anything, as everything in life is impermanent, but squeezing too hard can cause the thing you love to become damaged, suffocated, or even a shadow of what it was. It can also cause the object of your smothering to want to escape. I firmly believe Tamra left to escape you.

If you will just let go of trying to control things and people, I have no doubt you will find another amazing woman because you do actually seem like a decent guy, but right now your insecurities are owning you.

If someone is staying with you only because you are trying to make it impossible for them to leave, you should expect negative effects. When someone feels trapped by a partner, they will either retreat emotionally, become disempowered, or leave.

We all need space to be ourselves, and to stay with a partner because we want to, not because they make us feel we have to.

Also, when you are busy holding on tightly to things in your life, your hands are full so you won't be able receive new gifts and opportunities from life.

IT'S NOT THE LETTING GO THAT HURTS, IT'S THE HOLDING ON.

The only way you can ever truly have control, Simon, is to simply release it :)

It is that easy. Best wishes.

Dear Simon,
Im sorry that what happened to you on your show cause to me I think that you are a very nice man who just Loves his family and that your wife did what she did is wrong. She should have stayed more at home then out and about with all of her friends. I do hope that you find someone that will treat you right and love you the way you should be loved.I hope the best for you.

Simon if your still reading blogs, please know in some ways you r understood. It suxs when a spouse's attitude changes when u least expect it to. I'm sure u blame it all on Vicki. But when a husband is controlling as it seems you were a bit and she hangs around friends who's husbands aren't it made her resent that she doesn't have that relationship and start the rebel just as a teenager does. Kinda like when u say don't do that and they do. If you just let that leash lose and stop with the con tolling a bit it would be a better relationship. Think about it for your next relationship. Don't be in denial about it u played a part in it as well. I wish u both the best.

Simon if your still reading blogs, please know in some ways you r understood. It suxs when a spouse's attitude changes when u least expect it to. I'm sure u blame it all on Vicki. But when a husband is controlling as it seems you were a bit and she hangs around friends who's husbands aren't it made her resent that she doesn't have that relationship and start the rebel just as a teenager does. Kinda like when u say don't do that and they do. If you just let that leash lose and stop with the con tolling a bit it would be a better relationship. Think about it for your next relationship. Don't be in denial about it u played a part in it as well. I wish u both the best.

Simon

I wish you well and I was a fan of yours, the series has just finished here and I think you deserve better than what you got.

All the best Fiona

I am so sorry your marriage ended as it did. On days when you are trying to figure out what went wrong, think of Vicki. Tamra and you were fine until she inserted her negativity into the scene. It was unfortunate that Tamra couldn't see her for what she was. Unfortunately your whole family will pay as a result of Vickis manipulating and Tamra's blindness. One day she will realize it is Vicki who has the control problem, not you.

All the very best for the future. Some day one lucky woman will have you in their life and you can look back on all this wiser and stronger than you were before.

Hi Simon,

I am sorry to hear about you and your wife, I think you two are a fantastic couple and we are for sure not all perfect, some viewers only seen what they wanted to see, Drama and BS, I seen how much you truly love your wife and family, to be honest this show for you was the worst thing for your marriage and Vicky should not have put her two cents in either the way she treated her husband Don was a disgrace, When she seen it she fixed it, I am sorry that you are getting all the crap, uneducated people do not understand it take two to make it and two to break it, hope life give you everything you are wishing for, Take care

Farwell Simon. I don't blame you for leaving the blog since no one is on your side regarding your divorce from Tamara.

Simon you are a good man with integrity and honesty. You only wanted the best for your family and they turned their backs on you. You are better off making a new start with a woman who will appreciate who you are and love you unconditionally. A bright future is ahead for you. Best of luck to you Man!

Simon, Bye, Bye, Tamera endured all she could of your belittling control. After seeing current pictures of Tamera, the look of happiness on her face is amazing. Realize what you did and please don't put the children through the same misery or they will run too.

Hi Simon i do wish u the best and ur children to as well as tamara i do think conceling could work i think u are more private then she and sometimes the people we love we have to let them be them and stand by them no matter what and she loved u i just think u couldnt let her be her sorry and i hope u two work it out not only for the kids but for all those years of love that u two have at the end of the day u two want family not a show family is for ever maybe she can see that and u two some day God Bless

Sad to see the break up of a once happy family. I hope Tamra raises your younger children with a better work ethic than she did Ryan. He acts so spoiled, resentful and self centered. It is hard to believe people can't see that they are really making their children's lives harder by enabling them to be so pampered. Best of luck to you, maybe Tamra will realize what she is losing and change her mind.

Simon, you are a family man and I admire that. Tamra made a big mistake by blaming you and calling you controlling. You were so good to her son Ryan and you were right in attempting to discipline him. Tamra didn't seem to appreciate your efforts at all, in fact she only seemed to thwart them. You put family first and Tamra put her vanity first. Ryan needs a good kick in the butt and put out to work at a job. He's clued out.

Simon, my sense of all of this was that the cameras were there at a time in your lives when you needed some space. You looked uncomfortable and it was sometimes hard to watch. My feeling from watching the show was that Tamra wasn't willing to let the show go if it meant saving your marriage. I think that was a mistake for her. You seem like a decent guy. I hate it every time she calls you controlling. It seems like that is the first thing women say and it isn't always true. You seem like a great guy and the only one that had his eyes open the entire time. I think, in the end, Tamra will regret this when she sees how fleeting her fame is. Keep your feet on the ground and I hope you recover quickly from this. I'm am sure life has some great things for you and I wish you well.

Simon and Tamara,
Heres hoping that the both of you will live your lives as though your children are the cameras and are there 24/7. Peeping through keyholes, listening through walls, recording everything you say, both negative and positive. Because little ears are connected to big eyes and kids do see and hear 1000% more than adults want to admit. If you and Tamara choose not to be together, then so be it. Both of you need to be in therapy, separately, by yourselves, once a week and then just you and your children once a week. I know if Simon reads this he will shrug it off and he will say that I do not know what I am talking about, etc. If I could talk one on one with Simon I would tell him I work with adolescents, most of whom have gone through divorce and the one thing they all have in common...telling their side of the story and feeling someone is listening empowers children to talk and not internalize their feelings. If your child walked in on beating the crap out of Tamara, they would still think it was their fault. That is what children do.

Simon,
You are a real trooper and a real man!! Tamara was a nut to act like she did at the end and will live to call her days with you the good old days. She will never find another you !! I agree with you about Vicki, I wouldnt call her a friend, she is more like a nighmare !! Good Luck you you.

Vicki is not responsible for your breakup-Tamra and Simon are-people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones-and hug and love your better half everyday-stop blaming others for your own unhappiness-Simon -you're hot even though you're you .

Why is it always so easy for some to blame others for their problems?

I think it's a good idea that you're stopping your blog. Your behavior on the show seemed ridiculous. Tamara is a grown woman, a great mom, and a beautiful person. You seemed like you wanted to stifle that. Your comments toward her were SO not necessesary. Didn't you marry her when she had the big boobs, rockin body, blond hair, and bold sense of humor? It seems to me like you're one those guys who find a woman who's sexy and smart and witty and you love that about her, but then once you get married you don't want anyone else to look at them the way you once did, and everything you used to love about her, you want to change now that she's a wife and mother. It's annoying. I hope she finds someone who loves her for who she is, and not someone like you who wants her to sit down, shut up, and look pretty...as long as she's not showing any clevage. Ugh get over yourself Simon.

Simon, just be strong and move on!!!!! I'm a 40 Year old mom from Canada..... Not everyone believes what "We" see on a reality show..... It's entertainment! It allows us to escape from our own world for just an hour. Thanks for letting us in......:)

Believe NOTHING you Hear and Half of what you See, It is Just so Well said !!!! Family is the most important!Not faime, not money, etc....no Family and Health.

Simon,

Good luck with all your future endeavors. As for you and Tamra
your relationship was just oil and water. No matter how much you
try to mix it up to work it will never be a happy blend.

Your more reserved and relaxed, Tamra wants to be the center of attention and wear a lamp shade on her head all the time. It's fine for some husbands to accept that, however, when it becomes more of an embarassment to you then no matter how you address it to be a problem, the other person just starts to build resentment and begins to tune you out.

As far and financial, well the timing for the Auto industry and Real Estate to basically take a nose dive did not help your situation any, but again had you and Tamra been more equally compatiable for each other, then your relationship may have endured.

Again, Well wishing to you and your children.

Renee

It was very sad to watch you and Tamra as your marriage was coming apart. I related to what was happening because I often feel like my husband is controlling of me. After watching you Tamra I realized that I often blow things out of proportion and read into what he is saying to me things that just aren't there, like Tamra was doing with you. It was obvious to me that what she was experiencing wasn't reality. I wanted to tell you that I am impressed with how you continue to forgive her over and over again. You will find a woman who appreciates you but I think that Tamra will revisit these same issues in another relationship. Best of luck to you.

Simon-

It is with great regret that I read about your impending divorce. It had been my experience that if two people want to work it out, they can - period. My advice, as a counselor,(not that you care) would be to seek family and marriage counseling before pursueing the divorce proceedings any further. Take time to separate and work things out amongst yourselves. Divorce is brutal on children. Yes, children are resilient creatures, but they are also vulnerable creatures. Divorce is confusing for them, and it cuts like a knife. I speak from personal experience as a child from a divorced family (not a grown child).
I am a wife of 18 years and in her late 30's, and believe me there have been MANY times that there have been trying times. We married young, and we have fell in and out of love with one another for lack of a better phrase a few times over the years. I promised to love him, but I didn't promise that I would always like him. There have been times when we simply coexisted together. However, when I look at the faces of my two beautiful boys and the face of the man I call my lover and my best friend, I can't help but be so glad that we have stuck it out over the years.
I wish you and Tamra the best of luck. Please take care of yourself and those beautiful children.
Good Luck and God Bless!

Seek counseling. It will help you all and you might save your marriage. Your wife shouldn't be afraid of you at anytime. You seem like a good person Simon. A little change never hurt anyone. I hope you seek guidance whether threw psychology or church. God will never steer you wrong.

Good luck

Simon please do not stop reading your blogs. I think you are a great man. Tamra is the one who messed up everything. Also you are a great father to your kids. I know you tried your best with the older one. But sometimes you cant help people who do not want to be helped. You still have your number one fan which is me. You are sososososososossososososo right about Vikki.

I think and of course this is just an opinion,had you not done the show things would be fine.I've seen the dramatic changes that have taken place with Tamra since you guys first appeared.She was down-to-earth and dressed more so as well.Now everything seems artificial and just snobby, I'm sorry to say.Regardless you guys are real people with real children so I hope you find the strength to move forward.Change is hard no matter where you come from.Good Luck

Simon,

I have no right judging you're marriage, and I won't. But I suppose this blog has opened up to me the opportunity to share my perspective.

At the end of this you were, by her standards, controlling. She was, by your standards, perhaps a bit immature or less composed than you might have preferred. I imagine at one point she appreciated the stability you provided and you appreciated the excitement of her unpredictability. Sadly, at some point, the perspectives on those traits changed. I think it had a lot to do with being broadcast on national television. I doubt you minded her venting to her friends in private. I suspect she was fine with your advice until she feared others might view her as weak.

I imagine you're sorry you agreed to be on the show. I'm sorry for you that you were. No one is knocking down the door of my husband and I to be on television (we are both very unglamorous accountants), but if they were we would quickly refuse. I think people underestimate the pressure of the public eye.

It's all very sad for both of you and I wish you both(and your entire family) the best. Good luck.

My dad always said "believe NOTHING you hear and half of what you see"

Simon,

You are a great father and a hard worker. Don't let the show get to your head, or what negative people have to say. Reality TV can be a kick in the butt and you and Tamra deserve best. Your both good parents!
Take care

Simon,

I do not know you. Therefore, what I see on TV is probably not even 1/4 of what really happens. I know this is a tough time for you and Tahmra, but it will get better. You seem like a strong person and that's great. Situations like these, you have to be strong. I wish you nothing but the best..

Bye Simon. Be good to yourself and be good to your kids. Let and anger go.
Peace.

simon, think u do come off like your trying to control your wife, however some ways she acts, is easy to understand. i think you were right about the whole vicki thing. wish u the best of luck.

Simon,

You made the correct choice. Vicky "I have to work" was responsible for your breakup.

You strike me as a great dedicated father.

Simple Simon,

I'm sorry that you've become such a sad, insecure, little, angy man. Now that the dust has settled and Tamra has found happiness with another, it's your turn to find your true soul mate. Maybe Alexis has a twin sister for ya. Good luck in your future.

Simon, just wrote a blog to Tamara. Sorry to see you guys split but I think it is best for you both. You are one of the most controlling men I have ever seen, much like my boyfriend when I was 16 yrs. old. What does that say about you? You are cute and very smooth but if I'm going to watch the program give me a strong man!!!

simon, so sorry for your family that it did'nt work out. guess you'll have to wait on yourself from now on.

So sorry you got pictured like you did. Tamera wants to be Free, Fun, and Happy. Maybe its a mid life crisis. Maybe she'll realize you wanted to protect her image. I think compromise is whats need. It's never to late!

You are right things aren't always what they seem. I just say spend as much time with your kids especially your son. I have a 15 yr old son who's father is just not there like he should be and it is really affecting him. Once the anger and any bitterness subsides between you and Tamra you guys will probably have a great parenting partnership. Believe it or not one day you will be friends. Take Care

Ok Simon I have to say, I wasn't too fond of you, or how you came across on the show, but lately, man I feel for you, and my feelings about you have changed; for the good! Divorce I know is horrible! I wish you the Best of luck in the future! Hang in there!

Good Riddance!!!!