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Gretchen shouldn't be judged until you've been there. Even if Jeff did make an agreement with Gretchen, it was clear that both of them were quite fond of one
another.

Being a caretaker is very difficult. One has to stay emotionally balanced, reassuring and comforting even when one wakes up and doesn't feel like it. For Gretchen, or any caretaker, to take a break when others are available, such as children visiting, is quite
helpful. It refreshes and lets one spend time in hospital rooms and the suffering again.
Gretchen said it best when she stated that she felt like life was passing her by.
She's a young, beautiful, single woman who was spending most of her life with Jeff.
She's not married to him. Many gfs or bfs would have left.

Try to walk the mile in Gretchen's shoes. You have been mean spirited.

Tamra,

I am completely embarassed that women like you exist. Regardless of Gretchen's situation, it is not up to you to "expose" her. That's her private business. Not to mention, the comments made at the reunion show after Gretchen announced his passing were so inappropriate. All of my friends who watch the show and my fiance agree you are simply just another jealous woman, and it is so ugly. There is no other reason to attack someone like you did. You are pretty, but would be alot more attractive if you acted like a lady more often. I'm sorry but I think that was just a low-class move. No longer a fan, sorry.

You were totally out of line and it really was not your place to "out" Gretchen. In no way would it make you a righteous person. Somethings should be left unsaid and let the people figure it out on their own. I was shocked at the way you and Vicki attacked her and then turned it around to be the victims. It really was a coward way out. I'm sorry you felt that way about Gretchen's situation but everyone handles difficult situation differently and have to deal with the consquences on their own. She knows what she did and she will deal with the true reality of what she did later in life. Please next season don't show your evil side so much, be an example of how to handle things gracefully.

Who made you the Morality sheriff? I think you are a jealous witch who acts like a 15 year old rather than a 40 something Mom of 3. With or without editing you are a self righteous, wannabe who pretends to be famous. You aren't a celebrity and never will be. Go back to etiquette school and learn to be a lady.

Your are a back stabber and it is so obvious that you are jealous of Gretchen. You talk crap about everyone behind their back and really have no right to say anything about her situation with Jeff. Selling your old implants on Ebay??? Now THAT is tacky!

Tamra , money can't buy class and you my dear have none , get over your jealously of Gretchen you made a complete fool of yourself , .........LOL@ YOU !

Tamara.

I have been watching you since the Housewives was started, and I can not believe that lack of respect and class the both you and Tamara have – both of you are EXTREMELY small minded and lack true respect for your fellow man or woman, but of you look down on everyone else as you seem to be perfect in everyway and no one else really matters. Your lack of respect for Lynne and Gretchen is appalling one day I want to see you in their shoes and see how you handle it. But, I am sure your way to handle it is drinking and cutting down everyone around you, how in the world does anyone put up with you is beyond me. Your lack of class you have or the respect you have for your fellow human being you are so far from perfect yourself that you shouldn’t judge – as everything that you give out comes back to you. Seeing you and Vicki at the races and acting like high school girls was the reason most people hated High School and that is do to people like you always thinking you are better than everyone being overly opinionated and thinking you are always right. You need to take a step back and accept people for whom they are and not what you want them to be. I don’t even really think you love yourself once you can do that you can accept someone for being themselves and not what you want them to be. So you started a chapter in your area and think you are a great businesswoman but you are someone I can see right through being a business owner myself if I EVER treated anyone the way you do, I wouldn’t be in business – GROW UP and LEARN --- this world isn’t a Tamara world we are all different LEARN!! And your comment about the Gay community is totally unacceptable no matter how much you want to take it back you said it -

I really don't see why anyone cares about such a show that obviously wants this kind of drama to play out and how everyone has an opinion on such nonsense. It's there more important things in life, especially now than commenting on this show. I have learned to turn the channel, especially this season when it started to get so ridiculous.

Tamra,
You and Viki are A-typical!! You are both mean and nasty but you two always explain it away! If you want to admit to mistakes then just admit and go on...stop explaining and justifying being so mean. You should look deep within yourself(if that's possible) and just be proud of who you are and what you are. You don't have to be so vindictive and cruel...very sad...what are you teaching your children?????

jealous woman!!! Why are you so obssesed with Gretchen focus on your kids marriage and your insecurities

Maybe Gretchen wasn't telling the entire truth but.....Why do you care so much? Even though you may have made Gretchen look bad you did just as much damage to yourself. Stop obsessing over what Gretchen does and doesn't do!

Tamra--
I would have called her out too :)
K

Gretchen bothered me from the start - something just didn't seem right with her. My best friend died of cancer and in the six months leading up to her death, with the exception of an occasional dinner out or one night sleeping in my own bed instead of the hospital cot, I never left her side. I stayed with her because she was scared & in pain & I didn't want her to die alone. When Gretchen spoke of Jeff, she spoke of how his illness was affecting her & very little about how he may be feeling. Gretchen said that everyone needs a break, and that's true - but it was very selfish for her to leave for such extended periods of time. Caregiving to the dying really does wear you down emotionally, but you suck it up & do it, you remember that no matter how hard it is that time with them is short, and you definitely don't sign up to film a reality show at the same time. Give me a break.

Gretchen pretty much outted herself when she called Jay an old friend, then a stalker, then a friend again. She probably should have gotten her story straight in her head before sitting down for the reunion show. I'm glad you confronted her, Tamra.

Tamra,
It's sad how jealous you are of Gretchen...You can tell you just hate how happy Gretchen is at times so you try to burst her bubble as if it will bring you happiness....Causing her pain wont make your life any better...You poor thing.

Tamra,

You are the best! I am proud of you to stick up for yourself and expose Gretchen's ways on the reunion episode. Everyone says that you are jealous, but what could you possibly be jealous of? You are way hotter and, more importantly, you have a beautiful family, an amazing husband, and great friends. Gretchen should have nothing but a guilty conscience. My father recently was terminally ill and passed away. If he had a girlfriend who behaved like Gretchen taking care of him, my sister and I would have been 10 times more upset at the situation. The way she behaved was SOOO inappropriate. Anyone watching the show could see that Jeff was very sick and unfortunately did not have much time left. She should have stayed with him and his kids instead of going on vacation and you were 100% right in calling her out on that. You are the most honest housewife and I think the most real. I love you and will be watching next season!

No matter what your beef with Gretchen is, you should be ashamed of yourself for attempting to get her drunk and sicking your son on her. What if that was your daughter someone did that to. I think you are great, but your problem is, you are obviously jealous of her. You shouldn't be, you have a lot going for you, way more than her.

Tamra-

First off, YOU are the HOTTEST wife of the OC! Nuff said.

Ok, let's talk about Gretchen. She is a fake! She has an education, but act's like she doesn't. I agree, I think that her relationship was arranged and I am sure that Jeff loved her. It wasn't up to us to decide how deep/why. It's just hard to sit on the side and observe her behavior without saying anything! It was quite clear that she didn't care for him the way we (probably you/I would love our husband). I'm tired of hearing, you don't know what it would be like - B.S. - My husband had cancer at 21 and I didn't leave his side to go to the lake and shake my aXX, drink and flirt, etc. An occasional dinner would be okay, but c'mon she acted like an idiot! I think it's interesting that this guy was "stalking her, but he ends up at the same places she's at - and she does nothing about it. Seriously, a Restraining Order should of been in place.

Okay, I'm ill thinking of her and her antics. You and Vicky are the coolest (I miss Lori, too).

Can't wait until next season. By the way, I love your family. Your kids are sooo cute and Simon, well you already know!

Tamra, Hell Yes you should have called out Gretchen!!! From get go you could tell she was after his money. What she was saying and doing were two different things.The calls to your husband about her boyfriend,did she not think anyone would say anything? I don't even know why she was even on there. I'm still puzzled about that. My husband and I love the show. We can't wait for next season.

Tamra,

Should we hand you an Oscar for that attempt at explaining what you "meant" about Gretchen?

Tamra,
Bottom line is that you are jealous of Gretchen.

Tamra,

I admit - there were times during the season where I thought you were being pretty petty and neurotic. That was until the reunion show.

I am so glad you cleared up why you had so many ups and downs with Gretchen. Of course, I was really smelling a rat throughout the whole season. Then I would start buying her story again. Man, that girl can put on a routine.

To me, you confirmed everyone's suspicions. I'm glad you did it.

I honestly cannot believe how mean you are. I have so many comments and questions but you are not worth all the time it will take to type them.

The only question I have is regarding the situation with Jay. Why would you ever believe someone who had just called you out of the blue instead of Gretchen who was supposed to be your friend? That makes no sense to me that you would automatically go to the defense of a stranger and not to a friend. That is just sad. With friends like you Gretchen does not need enemies!

What Gretchen did was much worse than anything Anna Nicole did. At least she didn't embarrass/expose family like Gretchen did. She made a mockery of Jeff's kids, his ex. wives, and the whole show by making everyone feel sorry for HER....No matter what Jeff agreed to or not, she was a vamp/flirt, and spent a ton of his money on herself while getting all of the camera time/attention, making the rest of the cast look "jealous"?? I don't think they were "jealous". I think they were sick of being thrown into her story line and having to deal with a girl the ages of their won daughters and watching her make a fool of all of them!!!! Gretchen is a Narcissistic Actress ... She didn't care about anyone but herself.. and, you all fell for her act...just because of her "beauty". Read the blogs... half of you stuck up for her because she was "so young, so pretty, so "sweet", so "caring", so nice... Bulll!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've watched all 4 seasons religiously- especially when I was on bedrest while pregnant with my twin boys, it was one of the things I really looked forward to weekly...and still do! Tamra, I think you made a great addition to the show; I can't believe so many people are so down on you. For one, the shows are edited to sometimes look a whole different way than how it happened in "real life"...reality tv isn't complete reality, and anyone who thinks that is a fool.
I agree with you, this season was my least favorite too- because of Gretchen..(and I didn't care for Lynne either, but that's a different story) I think she is a tacky & classless person, and I was SO glad when you called her on it during the reunion. I KNEW from the first episode, there was no way she was really with Jeff, there had to be something more to it.
Don't listen to any of this criticism- you are pretty than Gretchen, and I never saw any jealousy, because what was there to be jealous of? Can't wait for next season!

You have no idea what it is like to have a loved one with cancer, so you should keep your mouth shut. You are like too many others who love to judge while sitting on the sidelines. You looked like a complete fool on the reunion show. I also think it's funny how you have the audacity to judge how Gretchen could be doing a reality show while she has sick loved one, but yet you have small children at home that need a MOM to take care of them and all we see is you acting like a 21 year old. So what's the difference? I hope next season you decide to take the LORI route and LEAVE!!! I mean seriously it isn't entertaining to watch anymore - all the drama you create gives my friends and I headaches! LEAVE LEAVE LEAVE!!!!!!!!!!

I am glad that you saw right through Greedy Gretchen. She is a manipulative person. Obviously she is good at what she does, she deserves an oscar for the pity me performance that her fan base is eating up. Get real! I'm ready for next season may be the fog will clear and every one will see her for exactly what she is.

I will start to say, Tamra you are my favorite housewife. But when you started your first show with the O.C housewifes, I did not like you, Lori was my favorite. You are open and honest and I appreciate that. I do believe all women have some form of jealousy, you are in a small way jealous of Gretchen, you love Simon and your kids but I am sure parts of you miss the young carefree life that Grethcen has. Hopefully you two can be friends someday! :)

Tamara:

Why do you care how Gretchen lives her life? Why do you care who calls her? Until you have been in that situation you should say nothing. That all aside, how she lives her life is none of your business. Why don't you take a look in the mirror before you judge someone else. You owe Gretchen an apology. You and Vicki can have each other you are two peas in a pod. You are both mean.

I thought it was wonderful how you put Gretchen in her place at the reunion show. She came across as a more manipulative Anna Nicole Smith! There is no way that I'm buying she was in love with Jeff; perhaps his money, but not him! When did you ever see them kiss with any type of passion? I really wish you'd spill all the beans on her . . . 1) we're all curious and 2) I'm sick of that poor me victim act she tries to pull off. And a a final catty note . . . her Farah Fawcett hair do isn't working either!

Gretchen probably wouldn't have left Jeff's side. It is just that the show had her going to bass lake and other places. It is called part of television. If she had stayed in a hospital room the whole season then that would have not give her much of a part. I think Gretchen is great regardless of what the jealous women think she has done. I really understand Gretchen and I think she really has a good heart. She made Jeff happy before he died and that is all that really matters.

As a mother who's son survived cancer, I have to side with Gretchen. Although, I never left my son's side while he was in the hospital, the toll it takes on the caretaker is draining both emotionally and physically.
So Tamara, you don't know, and it was insensative for you to judge Gretchen. I really don't care if Gretchen is a golddigger or no; honestly you all are overly concerned with material things. Never mistake honesty with the right to just critize and belittle others. If you were honest with yourself, the footage does not show you to be drunk when you set out to get Gretchen bombed. We all say things about other people, the difference is you really seem to get pleasure out of causing others pain. Trust me, it won't make your pain go away.

Tamra, I adore you!!!! watching the reunion special, you can see the truth on gretchen's face. she was not happy you called her. she should have seen it coming!!!!! gretchen maybe pretty on the outside, but tamra, i think you're gorgeous inside and out!!!! sometimes people are portrayed in a bad way. just because you said the truth does not make you a jealous or insecure woman.

I also want to say that i admire you for confronting your father like you did. i'm dealing with a similar situation, and i'm having difficulty doing what you did!!! Just know you do have fans out there and i back you 110%

Thank you for your apology to the gay community. I was outraged by your ignorant comment about the way he was dressed. Wtf? I can deal with bitchy, I can deal with witty, I can deal with fun comments and even some down right gut punching jabs at people, it's great television and funny as hell... BUT ignorant comments and bigotry is not funny, or great television. I normally love your personality and my friends and I are like you in that witty, bitchy way... Thanks again for your apology. See you next season!

Tamara,
For one, I would like to say how much I loved you during the first couple seasons during the show. You were beautiful, outgoing and was someone who I would have loved to be like. However, during this season you seemed to feed into Vicki's bullshit far too much and even started acting like her. All of a sudden you were caddy, jealous and petty. The way that you downgraded Gretchen may have been deserved in the end with her secret relationship, but in the beginning you had no idea and you came off completely jealous. Suddenly there was a housewife that was younger, more beautiful and more lovable than you and you couldn't handle it. Don't get me wrong, I feel that you're a great mother and friend but don't you think your energy should have been directed towards them instead of hating on someone that you were threatened by? I honestly believe you and what you said on the confessions show but I feel that you brought yourself down by constantly worrying about what the new girl was doing and how she dealt with her relationship. You're a beautiful woman with a great family and I fee that you need to focus on that instead of constantly feeling the need to tear down the threats around you. Do you.

You said you live your life honestly and you hate liars but your the only housewife that i found lied in several episodes.One big lie was at the day of the races episode when you and simon and vikki and donn went off in the other room by yourselves and you talked about gretchen behind her back several times and she peeked in real quick from the balcony at some point and she says are you guys talking about me and you say behind her back on no we would never talk about you honey and i shouted out tamara you fricken liar! yes you guys have been talking about her and when you went out to lunch with gretchen and your friend and told gretchen about the hazing you all did in the limo,well you tell her during that luncheon unless im wearing that black robe i do not judge,ugh what a lie too!,you were judging gretchen over and over again,oh and another lie when you confronted gretchen at dinner with the girls about her going to bass lake,your whole point was you would never go on vacation if your husband was sick in the hospital,you said that several times and when gretchen says to you wait till your husband gets cancer someday and then say that,first thing out of your mouth was no i'm not saying that,thats not what i'm saying,yes that was exactly what your were saying!.Say what you mean,mean what you say,you said unless your wearing that black robe you will not judge,well stop judging the actions of gretchen.

after watching the reunion I realize that gretchen story is confusing. everyone is saying how much she loves her fiance. well if she did love her fiance she would not be on vaca with some guy that she claims is stalking her. Gretchen is a sad sorry and Tamra you are not a jealous person.

Also, the funny part is if she was really trying to use Jeff, why did Vickey have to be the one to tell her to get Jeff to set her up financially in case he passed away...think about it....you truly are not a nice person.

I first would like you to understand what Gretchen did for Jeff. Jeff was a very sick man that wanted the last days of his life to be filled with beauty, love and fun. Thus why he began a relationship with Gretchen. He was trying to leave this earth with grace and his manhood all that in your pathetic vendetta and sad agenda fueled by your jealous against Gretchen all but destroyed. You lack the maturity and understanding to let the situation be and be respectful to a dead man by allowing him his dignity and his caretaker/fiancé Gretchen to go on in peace and heal. I will not say more on the topic other than it is a shame that you will never have the empathy to know what it is like to know that the person you are with is leaving you/that you will have to leave them.
The main thing I would like to address with you is your actions on the night of your etiquette story. First let me give you my back story, over a year ago I was raped. A “friend” of mine intentionally got me drunk so that her boyfriend could rape me. She had several different reasons for this, none justified. Alcohol is considered a date rape drug and while your intention was simply to embarrass Gretchen you did it in a disgusting manner. Over this last year I have wondered why this happened to me and I realized it is to educate incredibly ignorant and just plain stupid women like you who take these things lightly. What is wrong with you? Are you that evil? Are you that petty? That you would let a fellow women be left at the mercy, unable to make sound judgments, defend herself or get out of a situation if need be?
I am sorry you story and your reasoning for your behavior towards Gretchen is no excuse. You are an adult. In fact, you are older enough to be my mother and my nephew’s grandmother. You are in your mid-life. Wisdom is supposed to come with age. You owe not only Gretchen but the women who have been raped while intoxicated a huge apology for your actions and then sit down and tell your son something you should a told him years ago and that’s how a real man acts when dealing with a drunk woman, by leaving her alone and allowing her to go to bed. You are a sad sick woman.

In reality Tamara Gretchen is not a married woman! I believe that she loved Jeff I am assuming that Jeff told Gretchen to go on and live her life. That was nasty that you brought that up about a males clothes being on her bedroom floor how do you know that they did not belong to Jeff,Jeffs son or one of Gretchens family members? I think Gretchen did the best that she could under the circumstances do you know how hard it is to watch someone you love suffer with cancer? I am gonna cut you some slack on that since I have seen a better side to you at some points in the show. Now for the rest of yours and your families lives this show will forever be around I just hope it does not bother your children. I hated that remark you made that maybe Gretchen wasnt breastfeed. I believe that Gretchens beauty did make you feel very insecure. I think the thing that bothers me the most is how you got her drunk on purpose thats not a joke that only made you look bad. Jeff's kids really seemed to care about Gretchen and the lunch that Gretchen,Lynn,Viki and Jeana were at they when they tried to encourage her to cover her back on money from Jeff but then seem to call her a gold digger I dont know about Jeana but anyway How would you feel if Gretchen kept bringing up about you and Ryan like where is his dad You know that type of thing?
I dont know I think you should not have stuck your nose in Gretchens business so far it was between her and Jeff I believe that he loved her so much that he told her to go have fun. It does not matter now he has gone on May God rest his soul. I am gonna take your word that you made a mistake and said some things you should have not have said and I think in the future you should avoid to much alchol as it was a sick sight to see you groping your husbands privates in the presence of everyone on the boat including your Children :0 I almost fainted. You should be happy your parents were together a long time most people dont have that privilege take care of your own man worry about yourself and your marriage and kids and repent

Why did you think it was your duty to air someone elses dirty laundry,that may or may not even be true.That guy who called could really just be an angry ex-boyfriend who pretends to be gretchen's friend to her face but behind her back he is trying to destroy her name.You know all about being two faced and saying things behind people's backs.Why couldn't Gretchen love Jeff.because he was older than her?And what the hell gives you the right to question someone else love for someone.You need to check your own moral character!!!!!!!!!

Tamra, I love you, but I also love every housewife on the show just because everyone of you do good in life, and you guys just are like a lot of fun. I learn a little bit from each of you each time I watch the show, and my dream is to become one of you someday. Hope to see you on the next show :)

Tamra, if you really are willing to learn from your mistakes, take this time to do some self reflection and think about resolving the issues you have with yourself.

I think Gretchen is not only the hottest housewife but the nicest as well. She probably has the most integrity of anyone on the show and it showed by the simple fact that she isn't mean spirited or insecure like Tamara and Vicki; which by the way, were the meanest, most insecure, least likable and most aggravating women to watch of all. They would be better off to shut their mouths and learn from Gretchens' ways, instead of trying to cram their misguided and warped self satisfying beliefs down everyone's throat. More Gretchen, less Tamara and Vicki next season would be a welcome change...

Hi Tamara,
Im glad that you and your father were able to meet again. Thank God for the new girlfriend huh! I gotta tell you I really enjoyed the real Housewives of O.C. But i dont get it, how is it called Housewives, if no one really is but you Vicki and Laurie. mmmhhh...Anyway, congratulation on all of your success. Im happy for you, i love your house. Your kids are beautiful. I think they all behave very well. Hope they keep in contact with there grandaddy. Tamara how could you have let Gretchen get to you. You are very beautiful you have so much going for yourself. You have lovely kids, a handsome husband. Gretchen can't say the same.I think Gretchen brought out the ugly side of you Tamara.I have to admit i dint like it very much, but i still love you. Everyone is letting you have it huh. I hate it. Some people dont admit that they have some evil in them. Everyone has a little bit of hater in them.

I'm just glad you're owning up to things, unlike Vicki. At least you took something from this past season and learned from it and will hopefully grow from it. It was so frustrating to see Vicki acting like she had done nothing wrong this season — when she was actually the worst offender of malicious behavior.

But you were the 2nd baddest mean girl on the block this season. Tamra, be graceful. You're a grown woman. What if you saw your daughters saying the things you've said to their friends? Wouldn't you be disgusted? There's being an honest upfront person and there's being a meany. Sadly, I think you were a little too mean. It isn't about whether or not Gretchen or Lynn had faults — I'm sure they do — but it's how one conducts themSELVES that's important.

You were honest and apologetic on the reunion show and I was impressed. You owned up to your mistakes for the most part, though it did get sticky again with Gretchen. I would just LOVE to see a lighter, happier group of friends next time around. There's too much sadness in the world. I don't think I can watch another season are mean as this one.

Tamra,

The show is my guilty pleasure. I love to yell at the TV. I guess a lot of women are feeling the same way from what I've been reading! The show really portrayed you as a negative person who is super, super jealous of Gretchen. I know they edit, find drama & so on & so forth, but from what I've seen you are seriously unhappy. Gretchen seems to really get under your skin. I know it sucks to get older, but you shouldn't hate on younger women. We are all going to age so who cares?! Don't be so insecure! All of you seem to fight for center stage. You & Vicki have been so mean-spirited. All it did was make both of you repulsive to the viewers. OH, & I highly doubt a thirty year old woman (Gretchen) is trying to copy you or is jealous of you! Are you jealous of 60 year old women? Prolly not. Who would be? Plus Gretchen has an awesome life & has a body to kill for. She is young, pretty, wealthy & leads an exciting life. No one is jealous Tamra. Bury the hatchet & be friends with her. She seems very kind & very fun.

Tamra,
I like you. I also liked Gretchen but still thought she was a gold digger. Thought it was OK concidering Jeff had been married 5 times he obviously got bored with women pretty easily and didn't mind spending his money on them. As for Gretchen cheating on Jeff and making us feel sorry for her on national television the whole time that's another thing. If it's true which I think it probably is she deserves for you to call her out for trying to dupe the viewers. I can understand why you were mad and not playing along. We want to see your lives not be taken for a ride. I know a few people who know Jay Photoglou the man she was seeing so I am sure the truth will eventually come out.

Wow! All i can say is Tamera,
Jealousy is a sickness get well soon!

Tamra,
I have to say. I liked you last season. But you hit an all time low this season. I will stop watching if you are on for the next season. I can not stand you and how you treat others. Shame on you.. I pray that the good Lord will forgive you for being so vain and hateful.

Tamra - I truly believe that this Jay guy called you. But What I cannot figure out is WHY would you "Out" this information on the Reunion show? Why would you take the word of this guy as true and try to damage Gretchen whom you claim is your friend? Also please remember that the viewers are not stupid. We know that the show is editted, but honey... They cannot edit what you do not say. So please be honest and own up to your own actions.

I just started watching this show this year.. I'm pretty sure I caught up during Sunday marathons though. I have to say- besides sad endings in a movie I rarely get emotional when I watch television. I also have to say I'm not the nicest person nor am I going to lie and say I have never gossiped about another women BUT you and Vicki actually almost brought me to tears this season. Thinking you are above people and thinking its ok to ridicule people really made me sad. I just couldn't believe someone who seemed to be given so much in life: a beautiful family, a beautiful home, could be so cruel and ugly to another human being. You may say your not jealous but it was clear that your fangs came out when you realized you were no longer the "hottest" housewife. What you and Vicki did to Gretchen and that other woman was truly the most horrific thing I've ever seen on reality television. There were times I just had to change the channel because I was mad at myself for letting you guys get me so emotional. It looks to me that you both have your own parent issues and maybe that's where your bad behavior stems. Anyway, it's not like me to find you on this site or write in like a crazy fan but I thought that maybe if you saw enough comments about how people reacted to your actions, that you might consider taking a step back and possibly consider changing your ways. I doubt you want your children to grow up to see you portrayed as such a hated villain. Although your character makes for "great" tv- I would suggest you call your 15mins a fame a day and work on yourself and being a better mother and role model to your kids. I wish you all the best.

Tamara,

like my mother always says
"Jealousy gets you no where!!!"

Thank You "TAMRA" I knew something was up with Gretchen. I just needed somone to say it. I could tell that everyone knew, but just wouldn't say it. You've got gutts.....

Tamra,
I think you are one of the best housewives on the show...I would be very upset if you left the show...You and Vicki are my favs...I already lost Lauri whom I loved...If you ever left I definatly would not watch anymore...Don't keep apologizing for what you say...You call what you see...People need to get over it...Just by watching the show I can tell Gretchen is fake as hell...
Love your fan,
Heather <3

Tamra, when I think about the Gretchen/Jeff relationship I am reminded of a comment that Melania Trump made when someone asked her if she would be with Donald Trump if he wasn't rich. Her reply was "Would he be with me if I didn't look like this?". The point is Jeff had been married five times. Jeff knew that his money, not his looks would attract Gretchen. Whatever their arrangement as two consenting adults is their business. This is why I do not understand your need to "Out" Gretchen. If you felt it was that necessary to get the story straight, then why not dig into Jeff's history too? Talk to his previous five wives to find out how he treated them, he's not married to them for a reason. In addition, I do not buy your Jay story! The question that keeps popping up in my mind is how in the world did he get your telephone number? And why would you believe this total stranger right off the bat? Truly we all know that your reason for humiliating Gretchen had nothing to do with "the lie", but everything to do with your jealousy towards Gretchen. I, like 97% of the other posters, hope you do not return next season. You made this season stressful to watch.

Hi Tamra,

So maybe you didn't pull off the outting of Gretchen in the best possible way, but don't discount the fact that it is SHE that is the bad person here, not you. You didn't ask Jay to call you. You didn't ask to be a part of her deception with Jeff. Then, on top of all of that, you were asked to remain quiet about it and for that good deed you were made to look bad on national TV. BS to that is what I say! I fell for Gretchens routine the entire season. I really thought there was a relationship there with Jeff. It sickens me to think of how she toyed with that mans emotions as he was trying to fight the battle of his life.

Lady Tamara,

You share your life as an open book. Your honesty is appreciated. Your drama makes a boring life suffer because your not happy unless you are first in all things. Your life has hooks and splinters even though it shows you have everything.You really do not appear to be happy nor content unless you lash out with an evil eye or a sharp tongue. You have a beautiful family and a husband that adores you...should that not be enough?
I wish to see more of a lady in you on the next OC show.

My Best.
Lady Claudia

Tamra,
Grow up,you and Vicki are worse than High school girls..."I wanted a pink motorcycle" are you kidding me...because you wanted one no one else could want one because you said it first...Can we say HIGH SCHOOL...Please next season act your age...Even if Gretchen is getting ideas from you, you really have to act that childish...That's like my boys who are 5 and 3 coming to me saying mommy he is copying me...Really think before you talk...You put and awful lot of focus on Gretchen and her life....and you say your not jealous...PLEASE!

TAMARA, IT TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE! MAYBE YOUR ACTUALLY GAY MAN?

This show is my guilty pleasure. While I rarely admit to watching it, I have formed some decisive impressions of the ladies, as follow:
Jeana: classy, womanly, caring and compassionate.
Vicki: insecure, still seeking fulfillment in her life, had some tough years in her young adult life so is trying very hard to make up for lost time. One thing that confuses me is that her self confidence ranges from either really low to really high. no mid-levels.
Lauri: calling in life is to be a wife and mother.
Tamra: did not fulfill her partying ambitions as a young person so we see them unravel in front of our eyes during every episode. Also very insecure.
Gretchen: Fun, fun, fun. The life of the party (- I love most of your scenes!!!) Carefree attitude but at the same time very caring and compassionate. Smart too.
Jeana: Pretty face, great physique. Very California and laid-back! Has always led a privileged lifestyle. Hasn't needed to work for much.

Tamara, you are such a sad excuse for a human being. You, Viki, have the most self esteem issues. The problem with you Tamara is that you really are the the "typical OC housewife". You are trying to play a role that you clearly don't belong in. Whatever the reason as to WHY Gretchen did what she did is none of your business...why do you feel the need to exploit her..what's it to you as to what type of person she is? You are jealous but deep down you are a sad and lonely girl who needs to have attention on her. I feel so sorry for you, you are trailer park trash, and no money, house, status will ever change that. Remember your the one with the ettiqute class's..not Gretchen. You can take the girl out of the trailer but you can't take the trailer out of the girl. Your the perfect example of that.

Why do you only post comments that either kiss your butt or aren't that mean. I know what I said about you and I know you know. Hahaha too many nasty comments coming yor way huh Tamara. Jealous girl you are.

I was confused this season and not until the reunion show when you told your tale was I able to understand , or put together the happenings of this season. Thank You! I think all of us owe you a big thankyou and we now understand why or who Gretchen is or was. It is starting to make sense now. I think that it was hard for you to go along this season knowing that most of what was being played out was not reality TV at all but someone who was just in it for her own gain. But like you said "The truth will set you free".

NARCISSISTIC!

Your apology for the Slade comment falls on deaf ears because you are always saying rude things (without thinking) and apologizing later. We know you are not perfect and know that nobody is...but when you keep making the same mistakes over and over and apologizing later it just doesn't wash after awhile. Sorry, but you are exactly what we've seen often this season. Bieatchy, jealous and mean.

As far as "outing" Gretchen: I've never seen anyone on the show lose it like you did. Your vains were popping out the side of your head. What's with the anger? She didn't hurt you or your family did she? If she's a golddigger, it will come back to her in a bad way. Ever hear of KARMA? Hope yours can be improved.

I used to love you, I think you have stooped to a low level this season though. who cares if gretchen is copying you, that is the highest form of flatering. Even if you werent able to look at it that way alot of the things you said and did to Gretchen were just soooooo childish. I hope you are both on next season and I hope you are able to act like an adult, and not be fake. you dont have to like everyone, but you shouldnt pretend like you do to their faces half of the time and talk about them behind their backs all the time, which you did with way more than just Gretchen.

Tamara don't listen to the MORONS on this board. I WON'T watch next season if you're NOT on....so take that you overpriviledged bloggers!! What a bunch of idiots on this site...feeling sorry for Gretchen? Are you kidding me???? SHE'S A FAKE PEOPLE!! Did you people watch ANY episodes??? OMG I'm trippin'!!!!

Tamara YOU ROCK!!!! You are by far my favorite housewife!! I just wanted to crawl through the TV and HIGH FIVE you during the reunion show!! Loves it!!!

Lady Tamara,

You share your life as an open book. Your honesty is appreciated. Your drama makes a boring life suffer because your not happy unless you are first in all things. Your life has hooks and splinters even though it shows you have everything.You really do not appear to be happy nor content unless you lash out with an evil eye or a sharp tongue. You have a beautiful family and a husband that adores you...should that not be enough?
I wish to see more of a lady in you on the next OC show.

My Best.
Lady Claudia

Tamra,
You are the best housewife to ever have come on the show. You tell it like it is and thats why we love you! You are a REAL housewife of the OC!

Isn't it interesting that there is no blog from Gretchen after the reunion show?

Tamra, ok, so you busted on Gretchen. But don't pretend you are her or were her friend. A friend would have tried to help a "troubled girl" privately. You had an opportunity to out someone that would make them look bad and take that negative attention you knew you had and redirect it elsewhere. Very manipulative!!! You don't fool us!

This show is my favorite!!!!!!!!!
I <3 youuu!

Tamara you rock!! I love your honesty and quick jabs. Most people don't get it. People love to hate on pretty women. So F them. Keep on being you!!!

This show is different from ACTUAL reality because it lets the people who are part of it see the other people's reactions and opinions after the fact. This DOES NOT happen in real life. This is the whole appeal of the show. So, these ladies should know when they signed up for the show that they would get their feelings hurt when they watched everything back. If the ladies held in all of their opinions, well I guess we'd have a pretty boring show to watch!! Plus, if everyone who writes here has NEVER said their opinion behind someone's back, then we must have a bunch of angels in our midst! HA! IF you think the actions are soooo appalling, then why are you watching?!?!

Tamara
Thank you for clearing up what the cause was for your resentment with Gretchen. I think she is a big flirt and needs to be the center of attention. What on earth is so attractive about a person like that. Some of the blogs are critial of the housewives. If the truth be known, if you get a goup of women together there is almost always alot of behind the scenes drama. Thanks for a great season.

I find it very funny that bravo allows you and Vicki to receive all of the bad posts....but then go to GREEDY GRETCH, and Lynn's blog comments and they never post the bad ones. Come on guys you are trying to make the most money hungry, greedy person ever on TV out to be an angel. Tamara is a tell it like it is respectible person, an honest person.....maybe Gretchin should take notes next time she is in the room with her!!

Keep your head up girl....there is nothing wrong with calling people like you see them, especially when they like to sit back and play the "poor me card"!!!

Tamra! I think your awesome and am so glad that you called Gretchen out on the finale, I knew something was fishy with her and she was only with Jeff for his money! She had no care to be there for him and everyone knows if that would have been your husband you would not have left his side! I back you up a 100% in things you said and did! If i would have been on that show I would have lost it on Gretchen she is so fake! I like the fact that you keep it real and tell people like it is..you shouldn't hide anything!
Thanks for an awesome season! look forward to next season!

I disagree with Tamara concerning why Gretchen was doing the show while Jeff only had a few months to live. Seems to me Gretchen and Jeff both believed he would get better, would survive the cancer. From small bits of tape I saw Jeff, he seemed very supportive of Gretchen doing the show. He came down with pneumonia and we all knows thats very hard to overcome when you are already battling cancer. Jeff's daughter answered a blog in which she said her dad loved Gretchen and that Gretchen took care of her dad. Gretchen said Jeff wanted her to do the show and I believe that to be true. For all you guys who didn't know. Jeff and Gretchen had taped a show on HGTV for a makeover of their backyard in Newport Beach. Where they lived together. I do question why they moved to town and if it was only to get on the show. But I did say they... she and Jeff. He was healthy at the time. One question stands out.. did she move to OC just to do the show? She wasn't a housewife. Shes a beautiful girl and felt sorry for her when she was confronted by Tamara. Tamara was put on the spot and had no choice but to "out" Gretchen. I don't beileve the RHOC producers were innocent in all of this mess! I feel sorry for Tamara and Gretchen.

Tamra,
Just remember, always, always own up to it and the truth will set YOU free! Think before you speak and maybe you can gain some respect back, though, that will be tough. Vicki is not your friend. She is bad for you.

I just watched the reunion show, and wow talk about some drama!!! To those with the harsh comments, lets all be reminded yes to about 80% of the show it is reality TV which has without a doubt sucked a lot of us in. Let's not forget the fact that just like everyone here commenting, that everyone is human we all make mistakes, say things we don't mean, hell we all without a doubt talk $hit!! As a female, trust me you are never innocent from never talking crap about someone else. I love how Tamra acts, I don't think it should be criticized....I mean really just calling her trailer trash or insecure is that really making you look any better?! or just jealous as well trying to belittle someone else!! It makes sense that there is definitly something going on with Gretchen's story...How many of us would be on vacation or for that matter letting a team of cameras and new girls into your life at a time of such pain and suffering...Hearing Gretchen say that you don't know what it is like and how you would act until you were in "her shoes, is really sad, I know people in her shoes and have been in her shoes and I know for a fact that I would not miss a moment of time without them knowing that the person I loved were dying...I mean really come on, all of these women on the show are gorgeous and most of us are envious of the fanices they have...So let's not forget that we are all human, we all make mistakes, and we all have feelings!

I guess nobody has figured out that without all this drama going on, there wouldn't be another season of life in the OC. It's a show people. That's all.

Tamara, You rock girl! I admit I was not so much of a fan of you last season but you truly have came into your own. I am very proud of you for airing the trash on Gretchen. She signed up to share her life with us and the fact that she tried to hide her relationship with Jay is ridiculous! Please, someone, explain to me how your "ex" happens to frequent Bass lake the exact same time you do, why would you even give this man your time when the man you "love" is dying? Why in God's name would you even go on trips at all... my man gets sick and you'll have to pry his cold hand from mine. I will not leave his side, especially to go out and party... with my ex.
Go figure. I for one am all about team Tamara!

My husband and I have watched every episode of the OC Housewives since the very beginning. We enjoyed seeing the woman lead their lives in OC and it was fun to see the woman interact because you could tell they geniunely liked each other. This season was a disaster!! I was disgusted at the behavior of Tamra and Vicki. I have never seen two grown woman behave in such a way. Evil!! I'm surprised by Vicki because in the past she seemed very caring... but this season she was just plain mean and judgemental. Tamra, well she's a different story. I'm not sure how she made it onto this show. Her behavior was embarressing time and time again. She was appalling to watch... the final episode and the reunion special were particularly hard to watch. If BRAVO chooses to bring her back next season I am done!! The OC cast should be embarressed!!

Gretchen is beautiful! Why and the heck Jay or whoever would call you or your husband should be questioned in the first place! You never had Gretchen's best interest in mind. So I don't believe anything that this Jay person had to say to you was the truth! I think that what Gretchen had for Jeff was true love. What you have for Gretchen is pure hate that comes from pure jealously and it showed all over your face! That look makes you old and ugly - please give it up!

Tamra,

If Jeff's own family likes Gretchen, why are you still in her business? Besides, she's single now and can do as she pleases.

You have an unnatural fixation with Gretchen. Why don't you go worry abut what your own husband is up to instead. He really seemed to like that shooting lesson with Jeana's daughter. LOL

Tamra,

I think you're the pot that called the kettle black!

Jeff's kids love Gretchen and I as a viewer don't care what Gretchen does in her spare time. She's a beautiful, sexy, young woman and I think Tamra has too much time on her hands so she is engaged in a smear campaign. Sad for you Tamra, you used be interesting, now Gretchen is!! You came across as desperate for attention on the Reunion show..sorry for you. Face it ,Gretchen is fabulous in ways you will never be.

like someone using the n word and saying they are not racist. if you arent against gays how is that word part of your vernacular.. just own it. it was horrible to say and said with vitriol. its clear where you stand. no words in a blog can change that.

It did sound like you were obsessed with Gretchen's life. Whether or not she's a liar, who cares? How does this affect your life and who are you to judge? I can understand being annoyed with people who lie (and I think she did), but you were filled with rage to a degree that was way over the top. I could see mocking her, laughing her off, but exploding with rage as though you were the one she wronged? It's weird. She wronged Jeff, not you. Why all the rage?

I don't know why everyone is being so critical of Tamra's behavior...if you are all looking for PC, well behaved role models for your children and mainstream society...turn off Bravo!!! This is juicy reality TV at it's best and Tamra and the others have done their job...they have kept us entertained all season long. Good job ladies.