Kelly Dodd: What a Hypocrite!

"Clearly MEghan just wants to stir shit up."

First and most importantly, our family’s prayers go out to all the victims of hurricanes Harvey and Irma. I am at a loss for words to convey the heartache we feel for those struggling to put their lives back together. God Bless.

About this week’s episode…

I have restrained myself for weeks now from commenting on Peggy’s apparent complete inability to understand colloquialisms. I won’t review the entire litany of idioms that Peggy doesn’t understand, since every week there is a new revelation of Peggy being perplexed by common “figure of speeches” (credit Diko). Just keep watching. It gets worse, and funnier, you’ll see. What I don’t understand is how the hell Peggy was accepted to and graduated from ULCA as an English major, when I couldn’t get in? I know UCLA is an amazing school, but I have some advice for Bruin undergraduates studying English. Change majors immediately!!!! Forget about Shakespeare, Yeats, Steinbeck, Maya Angelou, Richard Wright, et.al. Study anything else. God forbid that, after you graduate, you won’t understand that bad kids get lumps of coal in their Christmas stockings, or that bears really do shit in the woods. Live by my mantra…C’s get degrees!

Only gay on Tuesdays! I thought Tuesdays were for tacos? I don’t understand why Tamra is so indignant about the rumor that Eddie is gay. What’s her agenda here? Does she just want to use that as an excuse to continue to ostracize Vicki? Really? Personally, I don’t care. A person’s innate sexuality is just that. Straight, gay, bi, try, trans, I don’t judge and I don’t care. If Eddie wants to be gay “only on Tuesdays”, fine. When Eddie imitates giving a bj with a Popsicle, its just tongue in cheek, right? If Eddie wants to “sword fight” with guys, “no girls allowed”, go ahead, have fun. Our best friends are gay, as are several family members, on both sides. They are amongst the most genuine people we know. We love them all, unconditionally. So long as loving and/or sexual acts aren’t hurting anybody and don’t involve children or animals, knock your socks off. Tamra’s reaction to people questioning Eddie’s sexuality makes absolutely no sense to me, unless infidelity is involved, which, as I understand the timing of things, for Tamra and Eddie, isn’t the case. I don’t care what happens in the privacy of a couple’s bedroom as long as all parties involved are consenting adults. Eddie seems like a great guy, he loves Tamra and treats her well. Most importantly, he makes her happy. 

On to MEghan’s loose lips and pot stirring. I have already established for a FACT, that MEghan initiated our text exchange, when she texted me out of the blue, stating she heard a rumor about me cheating on Michael. A rumor she attributed to a twitter source (wow!). Such nonsense. I was not going to let her get away with it. I definitely retaliated by disclosing that I had heard from a mutual friend of ours, that Jimmy had been having an affair for 10 years, including the time he has been with MEghan. That apparently hit too close to home. It is a FACT that she perpetuated the rumor of my alleged cheating by raising the issue to Vicki after their lunch. Unbelievably, during that lunch MEghan told Vicki, “You don’t perpetuate a rumor”. What a hypocrite! It’s also a FACT that she brought the issue up again during our night out at Hamburger Mary’s. Yeah, “It’s not hard to be a good friend”, is it MEghan? 

This week, I was shocked to see MEghan get flustered and play the victim of our affair text exchange yet again when hiking with Lydia. Lydia questioned her about what had happened at Hamburger Mary’s and Meghan immediately spun the story by saying “[She] said my husband was having a 10 year affair on me when I was seven months pregnant.” She claimed that what I texted about Jimmy was not the same as what she texted about me. Somehow what I said was worse. Huh? Cheating is cheating. At the time, MEghan admitted she was “out of bounds” and “was sorry”. I responded, “I am sorry too”. I thought we were done with these rumors! DONE!! I never discussed our text exchange or the rumor with anybody, until MEghan decided she wanted to give it new life.

Clearly MEghan just wants to stir shit up. Even if it means airing and calling into question Jimmy’s alleged indiscretions.  She must have thought her original disclosure to Vicki, and then to the ladies at drag queen bingo, lacked impact and didn’t garner her the sympathy she was seeking. So, she then tries with Lydia to sell her story in a more dramatic way, with righteous indignation and crocodile tears.

Let me first say that I never experienced post partum depression or whatever psychotic, delusional, hormonal paranoia MEghan was going through. In any other situation, absent breastfeeding and lack of sleep, watching MEghan break down in front of Lydia, I would have considered her a complete whack job. A very thirsty whack job.

MEghan said again to Lydia, “She came after my marriage when I was seven months pregnant”.  I have already made my case that she can’t legitimately hide behind a pregnancy excuse. There are over four million mothers who give birth every year in the US.  Ninety-nine percent do so without the benefits of the privileged life MEghan enjoys. As Tamra said previously, “drink your champagne and cry me a river”. Apparently, per MEghan, she cannot handle the “emotional burden of a newborn”. Keep in mind that Aspen was born in St. Louis, where MEghan had Jimmy and her family for support. While in the OC, she has her cousin for a nanny. I personally have never heard any of my girlfriends claim their baby was an emotional burden. What the hell? What else is going on here? Are there issues in her marriage that are causing her to stress and act out? Is that why she complains Jimmy is never around? No wonder Jimmy isn’t home, instead of dealing with all of her drama, Jimmy ships her off to the OC to annoy the locals.

Back on the beautiful Crystal Cove trail, MEghan is still trying to spin the texting story to her favor. In the process, she is trying to browbeat Lydia into accepting only her version of the story. When that doesn’t work, she then pressures Lydia to take her side. Meghan says, “You are on Kelly’s side, what does that even mean?” We’ve seen this tactic before. Any time Tamra, Shannon, or MEghan let down their guard, and even think about talking to, forgiving or making amends with Vicki, the other members of the alliance pressure the outlier to toe the line. MEghan to Lydia: how dare you stand up for the truth and represent Kelly!!! Lydia, you have to be team MEghan! 

Lydia is no dummy. She is a person of great moral character and she saw right through MEghan’s obfuscation. Kudos to Lydia for having the guts to stand her ground, correct MEghan and stand up for what she believes to be true. Don’t let Lydia’s polyanna persona, rainbows, and fairy dust fool you. A lesser person would have caved to MEghan’s emotional blackmail. As a mom, Lydia can’t be faked out by hysterical crocodile tears.

Let’s talk about what happened at Barton G’s. During dinner, Tamra told Shannon and MEghan that she had talked to Vicki and she felt like, for a moment, they were friends again. Immediately, Vicki is verbally dismissed and Tamra is pressured not to fraternize. They have to stay a cohesive unit. To borrow from our future Viking theme, there can be no chinks in the armor. No wavering. No breaking ranks.

I don’t want to say much about Shannon’s conversation with David other than I feel for her, for them, and their family.  Shannon has a sweet, wonderful soul and I want her to know I am always here for her.

Michael and I had a great time at Vicki’s birthday party. Michael says that I cannot have a gun, for obvious reasons :).

It was funny watching Jeana tell the story of how, within the first few minutes of meeting her date, I started talking about my breasts. This was around the time I was first contemplating breast reduction. Once I realized my faux pas, I was so embarrassed. It happened because just a week or two earlier I was talking to Jeana on the phone and she told me she was dating a plastic surgeon. I thought for sure the guy I met at the party was that surgeon guy. Oops. It’s a good thing I didn’t whip out my boobs and request a consultation (Like Vicki did to Terry Dubrow in Ireland). Although, I’m pretty sure that, as a realtor, he would have given me a decent appraisal.

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