Geez, get over yourself and stop worrying about the she said she said crap. Tamra is her own person, and you should be your own person too. And how could you not know that calling Slade a "chubba wubba" would hurt his feelings??

How people treat you is their karma, how you react to them is your Karma. Remembering that makes it so much easier to do the right thing. From what I see on the show, it seems you are really trying to grow as a person. Stay on that path and you will be just fine. You have nothing to be embarassed about. Stay positive :-)

Gretchen, it's great you cleared the comment on Simon, you are not a mean person. I don't want to hurt your feelings, but you both don't match. You are doing well in not engaging in marriage. Take it easy and enjoy life, forget of the other envious persons from OC.

I have to admit, you were really rubbing me the wrong way with the way you were talking to Slade, I guess that's how they wanted to portray you in this particular episode. But you are right, it's annoying when someone only wants to complain instead of actually doing anything about it. I am so sorry to hear what Slade is going through. You're spot-on when it comes to Vicki AND Tamra! Sending good vibes your way!

Gretchen, you definitely seem more "hardened", which isn't necessarily a good thing. And please, for the love of God, stop picking on Slade and his weight. In hindsight you must recognize that no one wants to be called something like "Tubba Wubba" by the person who loves them. It's mean and hurtful.

I really hope you can get back to being you...

Girl!!! I know you are friends with Alexis but she is a big girl and can handle her own. Break it down Gretchen! You went to Tamara's party and did pull the evil eye move. When she asked you if you were calling her an evil bitch. You did answer VERY snotty "yeah I guess I was" do you believe what you did is ok? Now you say it was a joke. What????? When Tamara went to Alexis party everything was fine. She made the joke when she was leaving. Alexis is blowing it out of perportion. So you were in attack mode at Tamara's party the whole time. Was Tamara like that at Alexis party? NO You and Alexis both feed off eachother. Then to hear you say Slade is fat your dogs etc... You know your Mother is a VERY VERY BEAUTIFUL woman. Anything that you want to say to your Mom? Of course not. From your Mom looks you are going to be stunning when you get older. But get off people regarding weight it can creep up on you too someday.

Why would you ever think that using the word tard is okay?

It will NEVER help someone to tease them about their weight. You should know that as a personal trainer. -A psychotherapist in Santa Barbara

Peggy and the husband did not ask you abou Tamra, YOU and your bf started talking and dishing her!

It is never useful to insult people about their weight, in fact, it could have the opposite effect than the one you intended. -A Psychotherapist in Santa Barbara

Gretchen, your explanation for why you were calling Slade "Tubba Wubba" comes across as disingenuous. You have been heard on numerous occasions referring to him as fat, and even cited that as a reason not to renew your hypothetical "lease" on him. (BTW, the discussion of having a "lease" instead of a marriage with someone was terribly insulting to Slade.) If he was complaining about being fat, it was probably because you gave him a complex about his weight - which, by the way, looked pretty incredible to me. Maybe the problem is that your standards are impossibly high. If you were watching a show in which a guy repeatedly called his girlfriend fat names, you would be outraged.

While your efforts to maintain your body are admirable, understand that it's an incredible luxury to be able to spend a lot of time and money on maintaining the perfect body. Meanwhile we live in a celebrity-obsessed culture in which an extra 5-10 pounds qualifies someone as "fat". This is not just absurd, it's destructive.

In a few days I'll be on my way to a treatment program for food addiction, so I'm under no illusion that being overweight isn't a serious health problem. BUT, our culture's absolute contempt for fat people and ridiculous standards for acceptable body sizes make it doubly hard for people who have problems with food and weight.

If you haven't see the movie, "Food, Inc.," I highly recommend it.

Ouch! Sorry, but am still cringing about the the weight remarks made to Slade. Editing may have made it look more excessive, but it still seemed harsh. People are going to say things when they are uncomfortable about their appearance, that doesn't mean you have to echo them and add to their insecurities. The idea of helping someone when they want to lose weight is to support them and build them up, not to tear them down. This episode was disappointing to watch after watching the episode where you planned such a nice surpirse for your parents. Just sayin'.

Ouch!! Even IF editing made your weight comments to Slade look excessive, it still made me cringe. When people are insecure with their appearance it is normal for them to say negative things about themselves. This doesn't mean you echo them. They should be built up instead of torn down. Especially disappointing after following the wonderful episode where you surprised your folks. Just sayin'.

Gretchen, love the necklaces you have been wearing this season, are they your designs and if so, where can we buy them?

Gretchen,I think anyone in a relationship knows that you do not really think Slade is fat. I think yall are the most real couple on the show.You are a just a little doll.And I think Slade is awesome.And things will work out. God Bless

Great blog! Both you and Alexis seem like honest people, who would not intentionally hurt anyone. Unfortunately, I can't say the same for the rest of your cast. What a bunch of witches!

Gretchen,I think anyone in a relationship knows that you do not really think Slade is fat. I think yall are the most real couple on the show.You are a just a little doll.And I think Slade is awesome.And things will work out. God Bless

Big fan of yours. Wish you the best of luck!!

Gretchen, you are a beautiful, smart, and self-supporting woman. Why are you wasting your time with Slade? Seems to me he is just using you as a free ride. Do something wonderful for yourself and find a man who will take care of you, while you make your own money. You need to find a man who makes you want to say no more lease option I'm ready to buy.

I LOVE you G....Tam is very unhappy, and sadly wants your life.......keep up the good work with your business...As vicky would say..Go to work!!!...

Gretchen, Peggy's husband is right about the B---Job. My husband is going to be 80 he doesn't get one evey night but twice a week I don't want to kill him. Been married to him 25 years so I guess it works. I didn't get any bling just beautiful teeth from Beverly Hills. Slades is a nice man cut him some slack.

Yay Gretchen! Everything you said about that 'certain cast member' is spot on! I can't even stand to look at her anymore, she just looks so hardened ... she never has anything nice to say about anyone, ever. I'm sure hoping that Jeana puts her in her place on the next episode.... looking forward to it!!!

If you were to roll back last years episodes you would see a difference in your relationship. Although you say you love and have fun with each other(and the sex is good). Your missing respect or at least that is what it appears like. Could it be his lack of funds? You might want to think about it though.

I adore you Gretchen! I find it funny Tamara claims you talk about her all the time and yet she is babbling about you and everyone else constantly!! Stay true and be you! This season you and Alexis are by far my favorite!!

PS I joke with my boyfriend all the time with his belly, and so does he! And every now and then he throws that same fit about it hurting his feelings. Haha

Your blog would be much more enjoyable if half of it didn't focus on Tamra. Take the high road and talk about something else. We get it, you don't like her.

Hi Gretchen

Is someone on the show still having jealousy issues with you on the show? You know before you came along that person used to look in the mirror and say those famous words "mirror, mirror on the wall" I will say no more as we (and the individual) know who we mean lol. Anyway, as you always look FABULOUS on the show, will you consider bringing out a clothing range? I just love your dresses and tops. If there was one slight negative I would add it would be remember you don't have to be so loud when you go out because your beauty creates an avalanche where ever you go. Best wishes

Gretchen, I love you! You're awesome!

Well I saw the last show last night and I felt really bad and sorry for slade that he had to run all the way home did he make it though? He lost weight that is so good and excellent. How are the dogs doing? Your parents looked really happy and excited I am so happy and excited that I got to see their reaction to everything that they were going through they deserved that happiness. I was kind of shocked that tamra went inside alexis house and started throwing her trash about the whole mace thing and her text messages and all that other bs shet! She literally needs to get married with eduardo or something like that and have a little eduardito lol! Good luck with your makeup line and your purse line girl! God Bless!

I watched the show last night and you have definitely changed from before and that truly and honestly inspires me like for real. I was going through your blogs and no i am not like a stalker or like tamra at all lol! How is slade and the dogs doing? I am so excited that he lost weight that is good for him. I was kind of hurt and sad when tamra went inside alexis new house and started to throw all this trash and stuff to her at her face. That was not a very lady like thing to do at all. Hopefully now that she has edward she can change and be more of a lady. Good luck on the makeup line and on your purse line. I checked the websites and they are so amaing! God Bless!

Go Gretchen!

I was annoyed by tubba wubba.Glad you guys are doing good.

Get a grip.

Your joke at Tamra's function was inappropriate because it made the hostess uncomfortable. Just as Tamra's joke was inappropriate because it made Alexis uncomfortable. It doesn't matter if everyone or no one finds it funny. Honestly, yes, I got both of the jokes, and may have laughed, but just because people laugh, it doesn't make it okay. Also, sometimes people laugh at comments ("Tubba Wubba") because they are uncomfortable with telling the person they love that it bothers them. And maybe it was okay for Slade to make the comment about himself, but not you. Whatever the case, to keep hammering into him that he should watch his diet and to keep calling him that name isn't very kind. Deep down, as you've admitted, you meant for him to take it to heart. That is why he became so hurt, and told you "enough". Anyways, congrats on your parents anniversary surprise - it was lovely! And good luck with "Gretchen Christine"!

Gretchen, I love Slade. I think you should prove everyone wrong and you two write a book together on making it throught tough times. Explain how it is on having to live up to what "THE OC" expects for you to have and look like always. My favorite is that you two are so real. Be patient with eachother, he seems to really love and adore you. We in Texas want to see you work and have more success then all the others!!! Together yall are a POWER COUPLE

It seems to me like you take all of your hatred for Nik Richie out on Tamra.

You wanna point fingers at "mean girls" you came off VERY mean in this episode and pretty much this whole season. I used to like you and feel bad for you but now you just seem cruel and vindictive. Now I feel bad for Slade, I don't care how much you're frustrated if you love someone you support him, and joking or not don't call him hurtful names like TubbaWubba - that's not funny. You're not funny. You think you are and you think you're evil eye joke was funny but it wasn't either. Let Tamra stick to the funny she's better at it, it's her personality, you just try to hard and it comes off way wrong.

Just keep being you! Your seem to be a warm and loving person who has dealt with a great deal in the last few years and still are a survivor.

Slade and Gretchen obviously have a great time together. Their relationship seems more real and down to earth than any other housewife. He admitted he does not have the money he used to but money can't buy a good marraige look at Vicki!

Gretchen~ What is going on with you? You were so down to earth the last season. It was obvious the other girls were jealous of you...It seems like you have lost a little of your confidence and your taking it out on Slade and Tamara...Although that was a nice thing you did for you parents, good job! Alexis is a bad person to be friends with. I used to have a friend that had the same character. You'll see:)

Gretchen, There is nothing wrong with wanting a significant other to be healthy. There may be more positive ways to go about it but hey, life happens! My hope for you is that you find an independent man who is more your equal. Now that's a turn on!

I think its time to leave Slade behind. What does he do, exactly? He runs your errands. Really? Is that the kind of man you want? If you marry him, you also marry all his problems from his past marriage....the kids aren't the problem, but the finances are. I would walk carefully through that mine field. If he was someone you were truly in love with, you would have married him already. Be the third and last housewife with this guy -- he is going no where fast.

So now you are a personal trainer? Ok.

Dear Gretchen,

Dear Gretchen,

Dear Gretchen,

I think you are the only genuine person on the show! I love watching it because of you! You are so beautiful!!! Don't get married til Slade gets a job and loses weight! It will only get worse! I know unfortunatley! I hope to see you at an appearance soon! Love Bunzy

you need to stop dating old men that is why you are always grouchy .....

That's what I thought! A degree in psychology, real estate agent, personal trainer, what else?

I think its great that you and Alexis are friends.She seems to be very funny and has a really good heart.You and she allow each other to be yourselves and you dont have to think alike or agree to gang up on someone if one of you have a problem with another cast member.It appears Tamara doesnt understand how to be a friend.She tells Vicki I got your back and she wont allow you to say anything about Vicki,wait til the fact that Vicki called you and apologized about the mace sinks in.She'll be back on the Slame Vicki train.

totally agree with the nik richie comment

Wow, personally I think the whole fight between you and Tamra is silly, and for Alexis to get all upset over the mace thing, give it a break, she didn't bring a gun. (although the way this has blown up, you would think she did) I think the 3 of you need to make up, life is too short. Hugs from the midwest !!!