You have the right to be offended by what Tamra has said about you, but you didn't have the right to be rude to her at her party. You really just shouldn't have gone to the party at all.

You were wrong for going to Tamra's party and attacking her.

I agree that you should not have been rude to Tamra at her party. You both have said horrible things about each other. I think you two should just get over it and be friends or not be friends at all anymore. If you think you deserve and apology, so does she.

Don't forget Tamra, to this day, says horrible things about Slade, and she really hasn't changed. Tamra might be ready to forgive and forget, but I'm not sure why it needs to be done according to her timetable.

I love you gretchen! Tamra deserved what you said to her at that party. She can dish it but she cant take it.

I dont think you shouldve expected an apology from Tamra, that was kind of a rude expectation... If you both discussed moving on apologies are not really in order you should have moved on and been polite you both went through rough times so show a little respect because she did to you

HEY GIRL. TAMRA WILL NEVER CHANGE JUST BE YOURSELF.YOU SHOULD HAVE STARYED HOME.

Totally agree! It was rather tacky of Gretchen to act that way.

There is a time and a place and this was not one of Gretchen's best decision to apporach Tamra at her party.

Tamra had it coming but it would have been better to air your grievances out in a more private setting without alcohol. That said I think you are honest in saying you hang out with her b/c she's in your circle of friends and it's understandable you went to the party in light of that. You got your revenge. She was a B to you from day one. Ideally like you said it would have been great if she apologized right off the bat but you didn't give her a chance and I don't think she would have anyway. I'd just steer clear from now on. I hope you're reltionship and business ventures go well. I think some of the women are jealous of you for many reasons so f them.

Totally agree with the above post. It seems like tamra was trying to make a better change, but it's like your taking two steps backwards and not being the bigger person. more like being a bigger B.

I agree. You were out of line. It was her event and she invited you. If you can't forgive her you shouldn't have gone.

Its good to see you stand up to other ppl. And I must say at least you have the guts to tell everyone how you feel to their face and not say it behind their backs.. Congratulations on your business.. Im sure you will do well. Dont let Vicky bring you down..

Dont forget guys..they are on a "reality show" what Gretchen did makes good tv. No one wants to watch a show where everyone gets along. Stop being so niave.

Gretchen, you have to build up some manners. Tamra invited you to HER house and the first thing you did was to attack her in front of everybody. It doesn't show that you become a stronger person, you become a rude lady.

A strong person could say " Listen, I want to say that I'm still very hurt by the comments you made against me". If you want to have a social friendship with me, I need to work with you in this issue first".

You don't need to attack her. Be strong is synonimous of being assertive.

I understand why you are not able to let go of how you were hurt by Tamra. You felt that she wronged you resulting in a big impact to your life and she has not sincerely apologized for it. I hope that you are able to let go of the resentment and put it behind you (easier said than done given your experience) - you have such a great disposition and attitude. Good luck with your business ventures.

Don't forget...you get more bees with honey! Loved the sweet, sensitve, understanding and most of all loving Gretchen the last two seasons. I hope you don't change to much this season and become the nasty housewife??? It's just not becoming on any woman. Best of luck on all the future has to hold.

You keep saying that you want an apology from Tamara, but I think you owe her one to. It takes two to tango!! Just because she says something you don't like doesn't mean you should be mean either. I mean making those hand gestures and telling Tamara to "suck it" I mean come on you to are grown women!!!

Tamra is in a happy place now and she just wanted to attempt to make amends with you since you both have one huge thing in common.. the SHOW. Simon was probably a negative influence in her life which caused her to act so harshly towards you, and even Vicki. But she's in a better, positive place now, and happy! Shouldn't you know this because you were a psych major???

Team Gretchen! You rock! You are the reason I watch this show, you are hot and on fire girl. Love that you are giving the women a piece of your mind finally. Love reading your blog, keep them coming.

agree with this,i think you are great gretchen but don't confuse being strong with getting revenge. being rude only puts you on the same level as tamra. good luck to you, you really are adorable!

Gretchen, You have always been a favorite of mine. I have always thought that in the fight between you and Tamra, she did things that were unnessesary and uncalled for. However, I thought you were WAY out of line yesterday. The fact that you can't be bygones be bygones, to me, shows more about your character than it does about Tamra's. Badmouthing her at her house (or her friends) gets you nowhere. What do you really get out of continuing this fight other than grief? Just think about it. It is really not worth it. Trine

Gretchen, I completely get why you have animosity towards Tamara. She's been gunning for you from the very beginning and I think it was because of jealousy. In retrospect, it may have been because of her marriage to Simon, but I don't think that is any excuse to take it out on you. You are a beautiful, joyful, woman - don't let any bitterness ruin that. The best revenge is being you happy, successful self!

Good for you Gretchen Christine! Every HW show has the ONE woman who is "normal" and nice - obviously that woman is you on the OC. Tamra and Vicky are so ridiculously jealous of you it's kinda sad to even watch. They are a lot older than you and probably realize that they will never have the opportunities to do many of the things that you will. I'm glad you at least have Alexis as a friend. Let Tamra and Vicky be the mean ones - they always have been and always will be. Good luck with all your new endeavors!

Bravo.... for not wanting to take crap from those two witches tamara and Vickie .but I would have not gone to her party and then explained to her later ; You need an apology from her ...but am sure it felt good to give it to her !

Gretchen it would have better suited you to decline politely rather than go to Tamara's. If you were ready to bury the hatchet accept, if you are not grow up and decline.

Gretchen, girl, you need to be the bigger person and forgive Tamra for everything she's done to you. Kill her with your niceness!! I love your craziness and I love Tamra"s bitch personality, but you girls are looking like teenagers on this show, or is this basically the script? But I love you guys and I could not wait for this season to start!! Where can I purchase your handbags?

I have to say I have always been on your side, but I wasn't a fan of how you acted last night at Tamra's party. You knew going into it there may be a confrontation and instead of acting civil, you showed out. Also with all the drama going on in between you and her, I'm not exactly sure why you got "liquored up". It just showed no class at all. Very disappointed. I think looking back you should've just stayed home. What was the purpose of going anyway?????

Gretchen, Please check your facts before you make a comment you know nothing about. As a licensed insurance agent, I can tell you there is much more required than going online and getting a license. There are a lot of hours / classes required, with testing for each area of insurance for which you want to obtain a license. In addition, there are mandatory continuing education classes required every two years. Making comments like this just makes you appear ignorant.

TEAM GRETCHEN!!! Looking at the "Whole person" concept, TEAM GRETCHEN all the way!!! Gretchen rises to the top, as usual. I wish that people could see the humor in the situation. Gretchen handled it with grace and humor. In my opinion, Tamra "baited" Gretchen and Gretchen did the Charlie Sheen, "Bring it!". Gretchen brought it! Did you see Watch What Happens Live? Vicki and Tamra are teamed up against Gretchen and whomever they don't like these days. In other words, whomever they are jealous of. Lastly, re: Internet Insurance, Regardless of the classes, hours, etc., on-line, yes, you can get licensed on-line, that's all. Back when I first started watching, I was interested in Vicki's business so I contacted them. You can become a travel agent for them, as well, All over the internet. Nothing wrong with that, just a fact. It is what it is. Gretchen is marketing herself, making the brand, won't be long before she's the next Jessica Simpson (that's a compliment). Can't stop, as for Slade, he seems to be the "ground", the "foundation", the "stability" that these ladies, Jo and Gretchen need in their lives, as we all need stability! Stop hating, Gretchen is too blessed to be stressed AND she's much smarter than any of us realize!

Gretchen, if you still had issues with Tamra you should not have accepted her invitation. You should have been a "big girl" & met with her to air it out prior to the party or not attend. When you do things like that it makes everyone there feel the tension & ruins their time. You are too old to be acting that way. It makes you appear to be seeking attention & drama. You are a beautiful girl who could get far in life if you would just stop all the high school antics & get a man with a real job who pays child support & doesn't want to be in the gossip.

PS, Gretchen, forget about the "apology from Tamra". Just forgive her, no matter what, move on. It's like drinking poison and expecting the other person to get poisoned. We all know Tamra is toxic, whether it was last night's show or on Watch What Happens Live, Tamra is toxic!

I want to know where to buy that green necklace she was wearing in her interviews. I loved it.

Gretchen,

You need to forgive Tamera.....it doesnt mean you have to accept her as a friend....it just means you can let it go...and move on!...This anger u have towards her is just holding u back from enjoying your life...Let it go!

I want that green necklace. How do I get it?

Great blog. I have always appreciated you being so introspective in your blogs. I also think it's easier for someone to tell someone they should move past something when it's not them. Tamara may be in a new place but that doesn't mean you are right now, and she was very hateful for 2 years. I also am aware that there is a certain obligation to attend parties together and film together. So maybe that's why you went to the party. I know I would not have.

She went to the party because she was sure that she would of get an appology How come Tamra can not say i'm sorry !!!!!! WHY.I do not get that. Gretchen as always been nice to everyone.

By the way I love slade, I hope they get married

Gretchen, I agree you should have declined the invitation. I was shocked when you said that to Tamra when she came outside, I just couldn't believe you said that. I do understand your wanting to be a stronger person and that you want to stand up for yourself but I do think that was rude. I think Tamra took the higher road because she did not come back at you. I have been waiting for the show to start and I'm excited for Sunday nights to come, I will continue to watch the show because I love it but I do think you and Tamra should burry the hatchet. Last season she did talk to Simon about being friends with you again so I do believe she wanted to put the past behind, not sure she's going to feel the same now. BUT THE SHOW MUST GO ON !

Gretchen was right Colorado - you'd be amazed what you can do over the internet in California; insurance, mortage/loan broker etc....Yikes right?! good to know other states comply with the law though.

Gretchen you just be you ! .... I thought you handled yourself the best way you knew how ! ... sure looking back you could have done this - not said that BUT this is REALITY ! ....and itsn't hind sight always 20/20 !! .... so lets first assume that due to filming -- Gretchen probably HAD to attend the party regardless of her past with Tamera .. and in all honesty -- giving that they haven't spoken in months and filming had started - Tamera probably HAD to invite ALL the ladies of the show for the party . READ BETWEEN THE LINES VIEWERS !!! ... the show wouldn't work if the ladies didn't interact with eachother -- and as stated before Gretchens re-action to Tamera made for a GREAT first episode ! .... But I honestly disagree with the majority of you as far as Gretchen "attacking " Tamera . I didn't see it that way at all ! ... she made a joke -- ok perhaps a jab at Tamera in the house in front of friends , BUT it was Tamera who came outside to find Gretchen and in front of everyone "call her out " on her comment --- funny how she waited for Vicki to arrive ! ... any who -- she asked and Gretchen answered ! ... it wasn't as if Gretchen searched for Tamera at the bar in the back of the house and attacked her -- Tamera came to her looking for a fight ! ... re-watch the show if you disagree ! ... its all there ! ... so give Gretchen some slack for her lack of judgement and instead give her probs for FINALLY standing up to the big bad bully of the show --- Tamera !

kuddos Gretchen --- I was proud of you !

Gretchen, I really liked you during season 4 but my opinion is kind of waning. I can't say that I've been in the same situation as you, having someone talk about me the way that Tamra and Vicki have, but you should not have gone to Tamra's party thinking she was going to apologize and then taking jabs at her in front of everyone. It makes you look bad and her innocent(or at least the less guilty party), especially when you've been knocking back drinks. Be the bigger person and forgive her; that doesn't mean you have to be her friend. Talk to her in private and get your closure and move on.

Gretchen,

Move on from Tamara and Vicki and all the crapola. You are fighting a losing battle and you come out looking small and ridiculous. If you want to be treated well, act the part. Right now you are acting like a silly girl. Good luck with your business ventures. Good for you!

After reading most of the comments posted here, it's obvious to me that most of you don't realize that Gretchen HAD to go to that party. It's part of her job. Gretchen, don't beat yourself up about it. Things happen and we are all human. As beautiful and funny as you are, you cannot always be perfect. Your behavior at the party wasn't "perfect" - but it wasn't the end of the world, either. And compared to the way Tamra has treated you in the past, this was nothing! You have a right to be pissed and on guard. Yes, it's always better to forgive and get past things, but everyone has their own timeline for each situation and it doesn't always happen instantly. If I was in your situation, I probably would have been in the same "mood" when I got there. The comment with the evil eye hat was funny - and I think you meant it with a bit of humor, but Tamra CHOSE to take it further than that. Given the emotional space your were in at the time, if it was my party, I would have taken you aside to talk to you privately when you arrived, to try and clear the air -- instead of egging-on a fight and stirring up drama to make you look bad. It's very clear to me that it was deliberate. Chin up! You're still the best and you're like a ray of sunshine in all of that green jealousy!

This message is actually in response to LMM in Colorado. I am also an insurance agent and have been licensed for several years. It is actually as easy as going online, taking the madatory class, passing the class exam, and then sit for the state exam. I understand that you feel that Gretchen insulted "our" careers, but in hindsight, she is correct. I did not feel threatened or insulted by her comment because I feel like Vicky has made "low blows" to Gretchen several times. This was just her way to get back at her. I feel like Gretchen needs to stand up for her self. Vicky needs to get off her "high horse" and realize that she is NOT the only FEMALE that works and makes a good living. She condems all the "house wives" just because she has a full time job. I run my business and am very successful. I also still have a personal life and a great one at that. I don't need to insult or badger my friends who don't make as much as me or who are house wives, to make myself for more important.

Hello Gretchen, I wanted to say I could relate to your comments to both Tamara and Alexis. You may not realize it or maybe you do, but I thinkk you may be grieving. It takes years to heal if ever. You are in my prayers. I too lost my husband of 23 years to leukemia. If you get my email address Please write. God bless you and yours.

Gretchen, I thought it was about time you showed that you were not taking their crap anymore. What you said and did on the show last night showed me that you are an honest and authentic woman. I am happy to see that your healing is making you a strong woman! I love you on the show, you are like a shining star in a pool of stinky women.

Honestly Gretchen I think your just mad because Tamra didn’t keep quite about u being with someone other then Jeff, so face up to it and stop blaming her for ur mistake. Like u at 1st but ur really becoming a nasty girl =(, please go back to when u 1st start the show.

Gretchen, you went to that party spoiling for a fight. You should not attack someone while they are hosting a party. When you did not get enough of a reaction out of Tamra you went for Alexis. When Alexis tried to explain or apologize for her offending "princess" comment you were too drunk to listen. I am glad you were able to work it out later, presumably when you were sober. Regarding Tamra,I personally believe you both have behaved poorly and the apology should go both ways. You may not have been drinking any more or less than the other attendees but your behaviour was more rude than everyone else's. You made others uncomfortable, and looked boorish in you treatment of the bartender. Overall you didn't pay her back, you made yourself look foolish and immature. If you truly want to move forward, as you say you do, meet with Tamra privately and make your demands in a mature and sober fashion.

Hi Gretchen, I totally understand where you are coming from, to tell the truth every women who has ever been slighted by a woman should! I am with an older man (frankly, they are way way better) so I have to deal with the gold digging BS myself. Tamara has been jealous of you this whole time. When jealousy sets in, women do really terrible things. It's sad. I wish you all the best and I want you to know that you are an inspiration!!! Keep your head up and keep moving!!!

Gretchen, I can think of a lot of words to describe you, but fragile is not one of them. You need to rethink your behavior. In the past you have been passive aggressive. Last night, you were straight aggressive and rude. Let's keep it real precious, you owe Tamara an apology.