Eddie's childhood was less then perfect. He was raised by family members and foster homes. So having his own kids has been a difficult subject for him to talk about. Even though he says he would be happy with or without a biological child, I feel in my heart he really deserves a child of his own. Which leads us to a very difficult situation. I am 43 and recently had a procedure to remove cancer from my cervix, with talks of a possible hysterectomy if it returns. I need to do what's right for kids, myself, and my health. I don't know what the outcome will be, but I'm sure everything will fall into place, it always does.
The market in Marbella was so much fun, I wish they would have shown more of it. The guy at the counter was SO rude, I was there waiting for fifteen minutes and he wouldn't even acknowledge me, just sat there on his computer. The rest of the vendors were so nice and really got a kick out of the cameras.
Our picnic at the beach was beautiful. I wish they would have shown more of our talk. At one point Eddie asked me how I was dealing and if I missed Simon. My answer brings tears to my eyes. Yes, I miss him, he was in my life for a long time, and I hate where we are at now. Most of all I miss our family unit. I hope one day that we can be friends and do things with our children together. The bottom line is we are different and things didn't work out. I drove him crazy, and he drove me crazy. I feel very lucky to have a guy like Eddie in my life that wants to talk about these things.
Two of my cast members have taken to the blogs and press to constantly rip me apart. I think your blog shows your true colors, since there is no editing, alcohol, or outside influences, just speaking from the heart. I will continue to keep my negative thoughts in and will only defend myself if needed. It's been a long journey for me, and I am finally in a good place in my life. I want to keep on a positive road to happiness.